How to prevent deleting edges when deleting a node

[ZachHaber]

The issue I'm running into is that I can't determine if an edge deletion via onEdgesChange is due to a node being deleted or a user purposefully deleting an edge. Especially since the edge Change events run before the node one does.
Is there any way to prevent those extra edge-change events from being sent out (or at least attributing them to the coming node change event)?

For reference, I am using :applyDefaults="false" set so that I can use an async call to apply the relevant change using onEdgesChange and onNodesChange. My graph is modeled as rows in a DB with a parentId column. When a user deletes an edge, I null out the parentId from the relevant row. When a user deletes a node, I want to make it so that whatever chain exists gets re-connected between the parent and the child to avoid disruptions in my graph - hence why it becomes an issue for me that the edges are deleted before the node deletion. I also tend to prefer keeping things as atomic transactions - so while I could make it so that I treat any set of edge changes with >1edge removal as a no-op for the node change to handle, it runs into an issue if there's only 1 edge on the node and then the node removal fails for whatever reason.