After the calming wave of reality has washed over you and receded, you are left with a nagging thought:
What did that obnoxious Randy Crowder tell you in 3rd grade? Let's see...."Confucius say:
'Man who go to bed craving marshmallow awaken with no pillow.'" As your buddy looks on in amusement,
you search around for your pillow with growing panic. And there, beneath a pile of bedclothes left
tussled by an uneasy sleep, lie the torn fragments of your favorite cheetah-print pillowcase!
Thankfully you were smart enough to fill the pillow with organic California buckwheat hulls
(Surely they are nothing but pure fibrous goodness for your innards), but what about the pillowcase
itself, now reduced to shards? You fumble through its remnants and find the tag: "Made from
experimental material. Not for consumption. If swallowed, call 1-888-285-20" Wait, "experimental?"
You've chewed off the last 2 digits, and your stomach isn't feeling so right suddenly. Now what?
You recall that California is in the midst of a drought, so what will help is a nice large glass
of water. You survey the room again, looking for something cool and refreshing.