xonizer/src.js at master · dalailomo/xonizer · GitHub

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const xonimojis = '✊ 👊 🤛 🤜 💅 💪 👀 👅 👄 💋 🩸 😆 😅 😂 🤣 😍 🥰 😘 😚 😋 😛 😝 😜 🤪 🤨 🧐 🤓 😎 🤩 🥳 😏 😒 😔 😟 😕 🙁 ☹️ 😣 😖 😫 😩 🥺 😢 😭 😤 😠 😡 🤬 🤯 😳 🥵 🥶 😱 😨 😰 😥 😓 🤗 🤔 🤭 🤫 🤥 😶 😐 😑 😬 🙄 😯 😦 😧 😮 😲 🥱 😴 🤤 😪 😵 🤐 🥴 🤢 🤮 🤧 😷 🤒 🤕 🤑 🤠 😈 👿 👹 👺 🤡 💩 👻 💀 ☠️ 👽 👾 🤖 🎃 😺 😸 😹 😻 😼 😽 🙀 😿 😾'.split(' ')
const r = () => Math.floor(Math.random() * xonimojis.length);
const rx = () => xonimojis[r()];
const y = (a, b) => r() > (xonimojis.length / 2) ? a : b;
const yx = a => (b => Math.floor(Math.random() * xonimojis.length) > (xonimojis.length / 2) ? a : b);
var xoniza = s => s && s
// frases hechas choni
    .replace(/te quiero mucho/gi, '❤️TKM❤️')
    .replace(/ puta /gi, ' so puta ')
    .replace(/mi niño/gi, 'mi niño rechulon')
// letras y combinaciones desconocidas
    .replace(/ñ/gi, 'nh')
    .replace(/ch/gi, 'sh')
// hortografia
    .replace(/b/gi, '_b_')
    .replace(/v/gi, '_v_')
    .replace(/_v_/gi, () => y('b', 'v'))
    .replace(/_b_/gi, () => y('v', 'b'))
    .replace(/z/gi, 's')
    .replace(/ca/gi, 'ka')
    .replace(/ce/gi, 'ze')
    .replace(/ci/gi, 'zi')
    .replace(/co/gi, 'ko')
    .replace(/cu/gi, 'ku')
    .replace(/ y /gi, ' i ')
    .replace(/que/gi, 'ke')
    .replace(/qu/gi, 'k')
// sintasis
    .replace(/, /gi, ` ${rx()} `)
    .replace(/\. /gi, ` ${rx()} `)
    .replace(/\: /gi, ` ${rx()} `)
// alguna e por a
    .replace(/e/gi, yx('a'))
// sustitiones de final de frase
    .replace(/a /gi, yx('ah '))
    .replace(/e /gi, yx('eh '))
    .replace(/i /gi, yx('ih '))
    //.replace(/o /gi, yx('oh '))
    //.replace(/u /gi, yx('uh '))
    .replace(/e,?\.?\:? /gi, yx('eh '))
    //.replace(/o,?\.?\:? /gi, 'oh ')
    //.replace(/u,?\.?\:? /gi, 'uh ')
    .replace(/s,?\.?\:? /gi, 'h ')
    .replace(/s/gi, 'z')

// quita h del principio
    .replace(/ h/gi, ' ')
// mayusculas cada letra q sea multiplo de 4, porq si.... y porq no?
    .replace(/ a/gi,  yx(' ha'))
    .replace(/ e/gi,  yx(' he'))
    .replace(/ i/gi,  yx(' hi'))
    .replace(/ o/gi,  yx(' ho'))
    .replace(/ u/gi,  yx(' hu'))

// las i catalanas
    .replace(/ y /gi, ' i ')
// reemplazar "ll" e "y"
    .replace(/y/gi, yx('ll'))
    .replace(/ll/gi, yx('y'))
    .split('').map((e, i) => r() % 4 === 0 ? e.toUpperCase() : e)
    .join('');