transcripts/en/Joe_Rogan_Experience/srt/ELUCUFQp1_k.srt

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I just do a podcast,
say I sound like Joe Rogan,

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but I'm not totally same voice 
everything.

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Hello,

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nobody.
I'm live here with Super Yogi.

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Bert Kreischer,
newly sober athlete.

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Resting heart rate of 47,

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47.
That's pretty crazy,

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man.
I talked to her.

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I called my cardiologist right after I 
talked to you guys.

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Am I dying?
I literally was like,

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Hey,
Joe Rogan said I'm dying.

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And he was like,
first of all,

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he's like,
I respect to a Rhogam but please don't 

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listen to about your blood pressure 
medicine.

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But I read somewhere that blood pressure
medicine and I'm,

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uh,
anti anxiety medicine lowers your heart 

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rate.
Uh,

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yes,
those are Beta blockers.

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Yeah,
I don't,

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I'm not on that.
Okay.

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Which by the way,
I spiraled out and then.

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And I couldn't get my heart rate up as I
was spiraling.

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So I was like,
I was like,

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I'm freaking out.
Normally my pulse will be through the 

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roof.
I call my doctor.

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He's like,
no,

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you're healthy.
He's like,

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this is what we've been shooting for if 
you just stopped drinking.

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So he's like,
let's just do what you're doing.

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He's like,
have a good time with it,

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and so,
uh,

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but yeah,
my resting heart rate's low.

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My,
I've never felt better in my fucking 

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life to be dead serious with you.
How many days in or you were 12 days in?

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Say the twelfth.
I'm one day ahead of that because I quit

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the day before I quit the day before 
because I was,

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because I listened to you guys and all 
the fucking armed tier doctors who were 

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like,
you're going to die.

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You need to be medically induced into a 
coma.

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Well,
you were telling us that you were 

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drinking six doubles a day by the way.
I,

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I,
I talk out of my ass when I'm drunk,

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so I don't know how much I was really 
drunk because I was dead.

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I was definitely terrified.
I was definitely terrified coming into 

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the homestretch of getting sober because
I was like,

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I was like,
man,

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am I,
am I going to die?

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Like I literally am.
I talked to Dr drew about it.

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I was like,
hey man,

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can I like die and stuff?
And he was like,

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well,
you can have seizures.

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But I,
uh,

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I stopped drinking,
I didn't even have withdrawals.

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It just felt good the next day.
It's amazing.

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It's killed amy winehouse,
you know,

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I try,
I've googled all this shit,

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but I think amy winehouse was just over 
the top.

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You've got to be the second you wake up 
until the second you pass out drinking.

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Um,
and by the way,

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there on the Australian tour,
there were hints of that.

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Like there was not,
I was flying and performing every night 

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and I drink on planes.
I hadn't flown sober at that time.

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And so there was,
I was,

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I was,
I've always been very measured with my 

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boobs,
so I wasn't,

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I wasn't going nuts.
Did you feel good when you're doing 

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that?
Like how did you feel when you drink it 

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in flying and you felt bad?
I felt,

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I actually felt really bad and I think,
and I think we all tweeted this,

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but I was like,
I was ready for this fucking month after

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that Australian tour.
I was definitely ready.

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That's a great way to go into not 
drinking is flight Australia.

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Do a tour for two weeks and then fly 
back.

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I was like,
fucking bring it dude.

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You know what man?
I don't drink that much,

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but I feel way better too.
It's weird.

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It's like I would have like maybe a shot
before I go on stage some nights,

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but some nights not.
And then you know,

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maybe someone go,
you want a beer?

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Yeah.
Beer may have one or two and then maybe 

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I'd have a glass of wine with dinner.
So you know,

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on a regular Friday night I might have 
four drinks and now nothing for 12 days 

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and no pot.
I went off the pot too because Ari was 

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giving me such a hard,

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your current queer poet,
you're not or cuts with roderick.

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I was like,
alright.

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I told Tommy,
I was like,

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I'm just going to quit.
Not tell them and then break it at the,

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at the end of the month like it.
It's easy.

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The pots have been easy,
but the dreams have been different.

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It is really interesting how when you 
don't smoke pot your dreams like ramp 

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up.
It makes me think like,

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what?
No,

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honestly like I just completely 
objective,

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I mean white death can be good and not 
be dreaming like right.

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Probably something happening.

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I,
I was my first few days of not drinking,

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I couldn't get out of lucid dreaming who
I was.

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I was having intense lucid dreams where 
I was well aware I was asleep,

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but I knew that if I could just,
I knew,

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but I knew that I was dreaming and I was
like,

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don't get out of this.
You're having fun.

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And so,
um,

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yeah,
but dreaming has been intense by the way

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that really my favorite thing is just 
sleeping good.

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Like waking up at six in the morning and
go and like feel good.

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Oh that man.
And by the way,

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and I,
I know that you like a fucking Uber Fan 

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of podcasters.
There's like a lot of people I have been

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introduced to through your podcast and 
like Brenda shots,

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one of my favorite people.
I love that guy.

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He's awesome and he gets coffee all the 
time.

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Now I look at that,
that gives me panic when I see him get 

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getting coffee for the past year.
I've been like,

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dude,
how the fuck is he doing that?

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I mean,
when I drink I can't drink coffee 

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because I start shaking.
I get way too blood sugary.

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Like really?
Yeah,

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just regular coffee or coffee.
I haven't had like a cup of coffee and 

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probably like maybe like eight months 
now.

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What is it about coffee?
Is it,

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do you put some in coffee?
No,

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it's just coffee.
Just black coffee is so.

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Yeah,
because it's my blood sugar's low from 

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drinking.
I didn't sleep well.

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I have a cup of coffee and just.
And then that I would be like,

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how does Brendan take naps in the middle
of the day?

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Like I could understand that dude.
I enjoy getting up and going to 

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starbucks and getting a coffee more than
I ever enjoyed going to a bar.

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It is.
I get up and I feel like I'm part of the

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community.
I like say hi to people.

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We landed from that first sober flight I
took Dan.

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I know that I'm going to sound like a 
child.

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When we landed it was me and Brendan.
Brendan Walsh was on my flight and he 

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and he was like almost randomly,
he random moves that my flight.

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I talked to him through text the night 
before and I was like,

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dude,
I'll see you on the plane.

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We got to lax,
and he was like,

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yeah,
I'm hitting up sober October with you.

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I'm not gonna drink either.
And I was like,

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awesome man.
Really?

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Yeah,
and I said this and I've never said 

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this.
I go,

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Hey,
do you want to get a cup of coffee?

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And he was like,
sure.

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We both got coffees at like 10 in the 
morning at the airport and I was like,

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oh,
I got a whole day ahead of me.

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Like I got coffee to me.
Like,

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dude,
I had the funniest Sunday I've ever had 

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that.
When I got home that night I like,

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I won't be able to see about a cup of 
coffee.

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Went right to sleep.
Are you worried

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that that this is like right now you're 
in this really great place,

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right?
You're healthy,

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you're feeling good,
you're sleeping good,

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but are you.
Are you thinking that this is just a 

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vacation from your other life or are you
changing your life?

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My therapist,
my therapist,

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when this started,
he said,

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do not do this challenge.
I think it's a really bad idea.

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I was like,
really?

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He goes,
yeah,

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asshole therapist you have.
I've heard this like Christine was mad 

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at him yesterday that my therapist fuck 
is this therapist telling him to because

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she's got a good therapist that she 
really likes,

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but I just don't.
Maybe you therapist doesn't trust you.

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No.
He said.

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He said to me at one point,
he goes,

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uh,
so how you feeling?

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I said,
good.

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I'm not having any epiphany.
I wish I had an epiphany,

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but I don't know,
but epiphany.

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I'm just enjoying it.
I'm really having a good time.

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I was like,
I don't know if I don't know how I'm 

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gonna get back into drinking.
And he's like,

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that's why you shouldn't have done this.
If you want to quit drinking,

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you should've just done it for yourself.
You shouldn't do it out of spite for Tom

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Ren Cho spite.
It's a fun little challenge.

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Like,
look,

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I don't want to do 15 fucking yoga 
classes in a month.

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I'm loving,
but we're doing yoga.

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It's great,
but do you really want to have an 

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obligation to have to do three a week?
Yeah.

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Do you do it?
Dude,

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I can only work in those parameters.

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I can obviously work to the extremes.
Like when we said no pot,

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no booze,
I was like,

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I'm cool because I'm not going to smoke 
pot if I'm not drinking booze.

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I'm a teetotaler.
Like I take things too.

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I take things to an extreme because 
that's the way I can help 

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compartmentalize things,
but I think my question was like at the 

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end of this month with November first 
rolls around,

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are you going to just go get fucked up?
A will obviously be with Orient New 

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Orleans in New Orleans.
We're doing the impractical.

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I'm going on a cruise November,
first lowery,

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big J.
Tony Hinchcliffe,

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seretse Khama like we're all going to be
on the cruise of the impractical jokers.

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Those impractical jokers guys are 
killing it.

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Dude.
They did the Greek.

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I saw 6,000
people fucking insane mobbed and I would

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love to have sat in the front row where 
they sat me and shit on their show,

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but I can't man,
I would love as a comic to be like,

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I'm better than this,
but then they forget up there and they 

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have such great chemistry and they're 
showing like inside clips and it's just 

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a multimedia event.

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Oh.
So it's not like stand up.

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It's like a bunch of different stuff 
that they do.

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Like they show like pranks.
They play on people.

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No,
they don't show it.

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They show more pictures from their 
childhood or like things that are 

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because they've known each other 
forever.

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Then when they were younger they tell 
stories about them traveling together.

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It really,
she's really a great show.

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Like imagine if I'm me and Ren Tom did a
show with the store and we talked about 

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sober October.
Tom and I would have a bunch of stuff 

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very quickly that we could talk about 
our hot yoga classes and red and all her

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texts.
Like,

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like one of my favorite things ever is 
when the eve of sober October Ref 

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fucking puts.
Oh sorry.

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Such a cunt.
He puts out all our texts privately 

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behind

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that we haven't been sharing with you on
instagram and Tommy,

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tell me that isn't giving you panic 
right now because I don't know what I've

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said.
Like we've all been like,

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joe is not quitting weed.
And then Ari man had already managed 

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this coup d'etat against you for pray 
for Joe already.

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Look,
I look,

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I know he gets a lot of shit online and 
everyone's fucking with already,

229
00:09:15,211 --> 00:09:16,044
but I will tell you this has been 
exponentially fund because of his 

230
00:09:19,081 --> 00:09:22,530
involvement because this is right in his
little swing zone.

231
00:09:22,710 --> 00:09:23,510
Yeah.
When,

232
00:09:23,510 --> 00:09:26,120
when you said your.
When you said I'm not,

233
00:09:26,630 --> 00:09:29,460
I'm not quitting,
we'd already then branched off to me and

234
00:09:29,461 --> 00:09:30,294
Tom.
He's like,

235
00:09:30,330 --> 00:09:31,163
gentlemen,
get ready for the assault on Joe and 

236
00:09:33,770 --> 00:09:35,340
both Tom and I are like,
I don't think that's a good idea.

237
00:09:36,290 --> 00:09:39,120
Order like know what's happening.
I want you to get your comments ready.

238
00:09:39,120 --> 00:09:39,953
I want them to send in.
We're going to workshop each other's 

239
00:09:41,041 --> 00:09:41,874
comments.
I want you to be the first comments on 

240
00:09:43,021 --> 00:09:43,854
this video that I post on this thing 
saying joe is not taking part of sober 

241
00:09:46,291 --> 00:09:48,660
October,
so I'll send you Tom.

242
00:09:48,780 --> 00:09:50,630
I love Tom to death.
He's such a cook.

243
00:09:50,850 --> 00:09:53,490
He his first draft or he's like,
this will not be working.

244
00:09:53,760 --> 00:09:55,170
It's too,
too pleasant to.

245
00:09:55,171 --> 00:09:56,820
Joe.
We're going to report and I will rewrite

246
00:09:56,821 --> 00:09:59,190
this for you.
Well Ari has been.

247
00:09:59,310 --> 00:10:01,800
He,
I think he's handling this the least.

248
00:10:02,340 --> 00:10:03,173
Like he's,
he's struggling like he saying this is 

249
00:10:05,701 --> 00:10:07,050
harder for me than any of you.
And I'm like,

250
00:10:07,080 --> 00:10:07,913
I think he's being serious.
I think he likes to marijuana for self 

251
00:10:10,431 --> 00:10:11,264
medication.
He does and you know he has said his 

252
00:10:13,891 --> 00:10:16,290
life up and I think if anyone looks at 
it from the outside in,

253
00:10:16,500 --> 00:10:18,510
he said in his life up for him.

254
00:10:18,620 --> 00:10:19,860
Yeah.
He's got his.

255
00:10:19,861 --> 00:10:21,590
He's got a nice piece of cake.
Yeah.

256
00:10:21,750 --> 00:10:25,950
Great apartment in east village.
He got all his friends.

257
00:10:25,951 --> 00:10:27,440
They all go out every night.
He'll get it.

258
00:10:28,800 --> 00:10:29,810
He's got,
you know,

259
00:10:30,330 --> 00:10:31,860
he's.
And he's one of the funniest guys.

260
00:10:31,861 --> 00:10:34,200
Do you ever go to New York to just call 
them up and go,

261
00:10:34,201 --> 00:10:35,170
what's the plan for today?
And he's like,

262
00:10:35,171 --> 00:10:36,270
I dunno,
let's get lost,

263
00:10:36,420 --> 00:10:39,450
let's go find some lobster somewhere.
But he's taken it seriously.

264
00:10:39,451 --> 00:10:40,284
He got mad the other day when I was 
fucking with them and I sent that text 

265
00:10:42,630 --> 00:10:43,451
saying that,
uh,

266
00:10:43,451 --> 00:10:47,520
I listened to your podcast and it seems 
you haven't been doing all the poses,

267
00:10:47,820 --> 00:10:48,653
but a good news is there's still plenty 
of days in the month to make up for 

268
00:10:51,451 --> 00:10:54,060
this.
The 15 different hot yoga classes.

269
00:10:54,210 --> 00:10:58,590
And he took it seriously fucking 
superman that struck panic and me,

270
00:10:58,620 --> 00:11:00,330
if you had told me,
Hey Bert,

271
00:11:00,540 --> 00:11:02,330
those ones don't count but you can start
over.

272
00:11:02,340 --> 00:11:03,570
You still have 15 days.
I would have been like,

273
00:11:03,810 --> 00:11:04,950
fuck off.
Like dude,

274
00:11:05,130 --> 00:11:05,963
I was the only fucking with them.
And then my second I had to a two wing 

275
00:11:08,011 --> 00:11:08,844
attack.
That was the first level and the second 

276
00:11:11,131 --> 00:11:12,150
level was like,
look,

277
00:11:12,360 --> 00:11:13,193
just go to classes and whatever things 
that you didn't do from the other 

278
00:11:17,011 --> 00:11:18,160
classes,
you could just redo.

279
00:11:18,161 --> 00:11:20,160
I'm on the honor system.
We don't have to do the whole class,

280
00:11:20,940 --> 00:11:23,940
just stand around like I was totally 
fucking with him,

281
00:11:23,941 --> 00:11:26,940
but he took it seriously.
He's also by himself in this.

282
00:11:26,941 --> 00:11:28,710
I feel like he's in New York.
Yeah.

283
00:11:28,770 --> 00:11:31,500
So like we'll text messages are weird,
man.

284
00:11:32,160 --> 00:11:35,370
It's not a good way to fuck with people 
because you know,

285
00:11:35,371 --> 00:11:37,200
you look at it as this motherfucker 
serious.

286
00:11:37,230 --> 00:11:37,980
Yeah.
He like,

287
00:11:37,980 --> 00:11:38,850
look at it and go,
no,

288
00:11:38,851 --> 00:11:39,684
listen asshole.
We're all professional comedians and 

289
00:11:41,970 --> 00:11:45,810
you're the rudest one out of all of us.
He said he hoped you rallied.

290
00:11:46,050 --> 00:11:46,990
Oh yeah.
Yeah.

291
00:11:48,740 --> 00:11:50,820
I understand the context.
I go,

292
00:11:51,120 --> 00:11:52,980
I hope you Ralphie to like.
And he was,

293
00:11:53,200 --> 00:11:54,070
no,
I hope you Ralphie.

294
00:11:54,070 --> 00:11:54,460
And I was like,

295
00:11:54,460 --> 00:11:55,450
Oh,
you want me to die?

296
00:11:55,620 --> 00:11:59,490
Yeah.
What the fuck he is.

297
00:12:00,100 --> 00:12:04,120
He is the most flame throwing.
Burn the bridge down Kinda Guy.

298
00:12:04,780 --> 00:12:06,190
Awesome.
Yeah,

299
00:12:06,340 --> 00:12:07,173
he's hilarious.
But I think that one of the things that 

300
00:12:08,891 --> 00:12:11,320
stinks and I wish this had been part of 
the better we should have stayed in.

301
00:12:11,650 --> 00:12:13,750
I wish he had.
You had gotten in that yellow corvette.

302
00:12:13,920 --> 00:12:16,630
Yeah.
And I wish that he had stayed in La this

303
00:12:16,630 --> 00:12:19,390
entire month and been able to be in a 
part of it because there is a communal,

304
00:12:19,890 --> 00:12:22,300
like when like today you're like,
Hey podcast at 1:31

305
00:12:22,301 --> 00:12:23,620
to go to yoga at 10:30.
And I was like,

306
00:12:23,650 --> 00:12:24,640
fuck,
I got a meeting at 10,

307
00:12:24,910 --> 00:12:25,743
but I would've loved that.
And like I love Tom will text me and go 

308
00:12:28,880 --> 00:12:29,713
like,
and this is the fun little of this gun 

309
00:12:32,710 --> 00:12:34,210
competition is like toms.
Like,

310
00:12:34,211 --> 00:12:35,530
Hey,
I can only go to 4:30,

311
00:12:36,340 --> 00:12:37,490
are you going to 1230?
And I'm like,

312
00:12:37,491 --> 00:12:38,800
yeah.
And then Tom will be like,

313
00:12:38,801 --> 00:12:39,880
well no show.

314
00:12:42,720 --> 00:12:47,170
Everyone looked at the distillery that 
donut factories to video is hilarious.

315
00:12:49,250 --> 00:12:53,470
Check all the hamburger joints.
He is by the way,

316
00:12:53,520 --> 00:12:55,510
we're having fun fucking with each 
other.

317
00:12:55,511 --> 00:12:58,560
But honestly I think Ari's taken 
seriously,

318
00:12:58,561 --> 00:13:00,120
like all that.
Pray for Joe Joseph,

319
00:13:00,130 --> 00:13:01,570
we'd addict.
It didn't bother me.

320
00:13:01,870 --> 00:13:03,340
I thought it was funny.
I was laughing.

321
00:13:03,341 --> 00:13:04,450
I reposted a lot of it.

322
00:13:04,630 --> 00:13:05,463
Oh that was,
that was the biggest dude I went on 

323
00:13:07,651 --> 00:13:11,460
stage on in DC that first night.
And people were like,

324
00:13:11,500 --> 00:13:13,360
people are like,
we should take a moment of silence.

325
00:13:13,361 --> 00:13:13,831
And I was like,
yeah,

326
00:13:13,831 --> 00:13:15,190
I'll take a moment of silence.
Everyone bowed their head and.

327
00:13:15,210 --> 00:13:15,500
And

328
00:13:15,500 --> 00:13:19,190
for you it was so much fucking fun.
Me.

329
00:13:19,370 --> 00:13:20,203
Wow.
It's been like not smoking weed for 11 

330
00:13:22,131 --> 00:13:24,500
days is one of the easiest things I've 
ever done in my life.

331
00:13:24,920 --> 00:13:27,530
It's not hard at all.
I just don't smoke pot.

332
00:13:27,740 --> 00:13:28,880
It's not like,
wow,

333
00:13:28,881 --> 00:13:31,910
how do I go on?
I've been having some great sets.

334
00:13:31,970 --> 00:13:36,740
Sets have been fun.
I've done probably in the 12 nights,

335
00:13:36,741 --> 00:13:38,410
I've probably done like nine,
eight,

336
00:13:38,430 --> 00:13:39,530
nine,
eight or nine sets.

337
00:13:40,130 --> 00:13:42,530
There's a most sets I've done.
No,

338
00:13:42,531 --> 00:13:47,531
we'd ever really since I started smoking
pot like 20 years ago.

339
00:13:48,890 --> 00:13:49,723
I've real.

340
00:13:49,760 --> 00:13:50,451
Uh,
I did.

341
00:13:50,451 --> 00:13:52,400
Uh,
I did spots of the story the other night

342
00:13:52,730 --> 00:13:55,700
and I had great set stone sober and not,
you know,

343
00:13:55,701 --> 00:13:56,534
it's so funny is I,
I have a lot of apologies to issue on 

344
00:13:59,811 --> 00:14:03,800
this podcast.
There's a lot of things that I said when

345
00:14:03,801 --> 00:14:07,700
we were drinking that I then did and 
went,

346
00:14:07,730 --> 00:14:09,620
oh,
I guess I was a little wrong about that.

347
00:14:09,650 --> 00:14:10,483
Like what?
Like for number one is I don't drink on 

348
00:14:11,331 --> 00:14:12,164
stage,
like I didn't realize that there's a 

349
00:14:13,611 --> 00:14:16,760
difference between not drinking on stage
and having a drink with you on stage.

350
00:14:16,850 --> 00:14:17,683
There's a little bit of a comfort level 
knowing I can kill this drink and I 

351
00:14:20,361 --> 00:14:23,150
don't have to deal with this.
Like and that first night,

352
00:14:23,510 --> 00:14:24,343
that Saturday night I went home with no 
booze for both shows and on that last 

353
00:14:27,051 --> 00:14:27,771
show I was like,
oh,

354
00:14:27,771 --> 00:14:30,740
I could use a cocktail and I definitely 
drink on stage.

355
00:14:30,900 --> 00:14:32,960
Like I was like,
I wouldn't mind a cocktail right now.

356
00:14:32,990 --> 00:14:35,610
So you were thinking before that you 
didn't drink on stage?

357
00:14:35,840 --> 00:14:36,673
I say I go,
it's the truth is I don't mind before 

358
00:14:38,211 --> 00:14:39,530
being sober.
I enjoy it.

359
00:14:40,070 --> 00:14:42,980
But I would say like if you had said so,
do you get drunk on stage?

360
00:14:42,981 --> 00:14:43,311
I'm like,
no,

361
00:14:43,311 --> 00:14:44,144
never.
But I definitely bring drinks on stage 

362
00:14:45,681 --> 00:14:47,830
with me and I didn't like it

363
00:14:48,150 --> 00:14:51,290
had a breathalyzer.
Tests have been on stage.

364
00:14:51,291 --> 00:14:52,090
Was driving.
What'd

365
00:14:52,090 --> 00:14:53,770
you get arrested?
Uh,

366
00:14:53,980 --> 00:14:54,980
yeah,
yeah,

367
00:14:55,130 --> 00:14:56,450
like a bullet point eight.
Yeah,

368
00:14:56,451 --> 00:14:58,170
I definitely would go stage,
uh,

369
00:14:58,171 --> 00:15:01,810
that's number one apology issued a 
number two is a treadmill's.

370
00:15:01,820 --> 00:15:03,410
We're not real running.
No,

371
00:15:03,470 --> 00:15:05,880
I told you,
dude,

372
00:15:05,890 --> 00:15:08,600
you got to come do my course.
Do the chorus I do with me.

373
00:15:08,601 --> 00:15:10,590
It's fucking ruthless.
Oh,

374
00:15:10,670 --> 00:15:12,590
running hills.
That's where it's at,

375
00:15:12,591 --> 00:15:13,424
man.
Dude,

376
00:15:13,580 --> 00:15:17,060
let's just say um,
I didn't really like,

377
00:15:17,061 --> 00:15:18,860
I run on the treadmill all the time and 
I'm,

378
00:15:18,950 --> 00:15:19,783
oh,
I can easily run under a 10 minute mile 

379
00:15:21,680 --> 00:15:22,513
A.
I go on the road and my first set of 

380
00:15:25,311 --> 00:15:26,850
models was like 12 minute miles and I 
was,

381
00:15:26,930 --> 00:15:29,240
I was in pain and I was like,
Whoa,

382
00:15:29,241 --> 00:15:32,030
this is not the same.
And then I got to a 10 minute mile.

383
00:15:32,031 --> 00:15:33,770
I was like,
that feels like a fucking sprint.

384
00:15:33,980 --> 00:15:35,090
But you know,
you can get.

385
00:15:35,180 --> 00:15:37,960
Do we show you those treadmills that are
like running?

386
00:15:38,010 --> 00:15:39,330
They're really expensive.
Yeah,

387
00:15:39,350 --> 00:15:40,550
I've thought about getting one,
but.

388
00:15:40,880 --> 00:15:43,940
So what I do now is I'm doing some sort 
of deal with them.

389
00:15:44,500 --> 00:15:46,100
What are,
who are the sponsors,

390
00:15:46,370 --> 00:15:48,710
go to rogue,
rogue athletics.

391
00:15:49,300 --> 00:15:50,133
They're the guys who made the um,
reverse hyper machine that we have in 

392
00:15:53,151 --> 00:15:57,080
the back and I'm,
I'm actually called true form.

393
00:15:57,200 --> 00:15:57,920
Yeah,
pull them,

394
00:15:57,920 --> 00:15:59,570
pull this shit out so we could see what 
it looks like.

395
00:15:59,900 --> 00:16:02,730
But this thing is different because it's
at,

396
00:16:02,760 --> 00:16:04,920
you're actually pushing your own body 
weight.

397
00:16:05,270 --> 00:16:06,103
There's no machine behind it.
It's just got friction to it and it's 

398
00:16:08,871 --> 00:16:09,704
got like a slope and you run up on it.
And it really is like the closest thing 

399
00:16:14,391 --> 00:16:17,420
to running.
I still think actual running is better,

400
00:16:17,750 --> 00:16:21,860
but that is a very close second.
According to about 5,000

401
00:16:21,861 --> 00:16:22,170
bucks.

402
00:16:22,170 --> 00:16:24,740
They're really expensive.
Tree form hit me so expensive.

403
00:16:24,860 --> 00:16:25,920
They hit you up.
They go.

404
00:16:25,950 --> 00:16:27,590
I'm saying hey to form.
Hit me up.

405
00:16:27,610 --> 00:16:27,891
Yeah.
Hey,

406
00:16:27,891 --> 00:16:30,160
true form.
We'll fucking do a free app,

407
00:16:30,190 --> 00:16:32,210
but we do a free ad for you right now.
You know,

408
00:16:32,300 --> 00:16:34,520
who can afford that?
That's a lot of money.

409
00:16:34,550 --> 00:16:35,450
Well,
some people can,

410
00:16:35,830 --> 00:16:36,710
you know what I mean?
For sure.

411
00:16:36,711 --> 00:16:37,544
Some people would be,
it'd be willing if you had to have one 

412
00:16:40,281 --> 00:16:42,690
piece of equipment in your house,
you know,

413
00:16:42,700 --> 00:16:45,470
and you budgeted it out 5,000
bucks,

414
00:16:45,471 --> 00:16:46,304
it's probably worth it if you could 
actually use it and get in great shape 

415
00:16:48,651 --> 00:16:49,484
with it.
But I really feel like the best way to 

416
00:16:50,811 --> 00:16:52,520
do it is just go outside.
I mean,

417
00:16:52,521 --> 00:16:53,354
I think especially if you can go 
somewhere where there's like a dirt 

418
00:16:55,430 --> 00:16:59,060
trail and like a lake to look at,
it makes it more interesting,

419
00:16:59,110 --> 00:16:59,943
but it's been,
it's been one of the cool things about 

420
00:17:00,951 --> 00:17:03,960
not drinking and getting out and doing 
roadwork is uh,

421
00:17:04,040 --> 00:17:07,100
my wife calls it source energy of like 
getting out there and going like,

422
00:17:07,130 --> 00:17:08,330
oh,
it's fucking beautiful.

423
00:17:08,640 --> 00:17:10,040
Life is really beautiful.
Yeah.

424
00:17:10,220 --> 00:17:13,430
I go to the park that were Joe.
Joe used to live right by this park.

425
00:17:13,760 --> 00:17:15,070
I used to go there all the time.
It's ego.

426
00:17:15,080 --> 00:17:15,913
He and A.
and I go to this park every morning we 

427
00:17:20,541 --> 00:17:21,374
go,
my wife will walk it and I run it and 

428
00:17:23,241 --> 00:17:26,300
I'm loving it.
So what I'm doing is I'm doing road work

429
00:17:26,510 --> 00:17:29,060
probably three times a week and then 
twice a week I get on the treadmill,

430
00:17:29,360 --> 00:17:30,193
just don't,
I'm terrified of injury and then not 

431
00:17:31,671 --> 00:17:33,240
being able to run.
So I don't.

432
00:17:33,320 --> 00:17:35,810
And I'm trying to run five days a week.
What are you worried about?

433
00:17:35,820 --> 00:17:38,170
Like planner or something planned you 
had that for awhile?

434
00:17:38,380 --> 00:17:41,070
Plantar fasciitis kit is terrifying.
Dot Shin splints.

435
00:17:41,110 --> 00:17:42,860
My you get it in the middle of your 
foot.

436
00:17:42,861 --> 00:17:44,220
Like where are you getting that?
Uh,

437
00:17:44,700 --> 00:17:46,670
like if this is your foot,
like right towards the heel.

438
00:17:46,940 --> 00:17:47,681
Oh yeah.
Yeah.

439
00:17:47,681 --> 00:17:50,280
And then sometimes it'll happen inside 
the heel and you'll feel it.

440
00:17:50,281 --> 00:17:53,130
Like when your heel touches the ground,
it feels like glass.

441
00:17:53,370 --> 00:17:56,250
When you first started doing yoga,
are you noticing,

442
00:17:56,320 --> 00:18:01,320
we're noticing rather that your foot was
like a unstable and that like it hurt,

443
00:18:01,560 --> 00:18:04,560
it hurts your feet to try to balance on 
one foot and do the poses.

444
00:18:04,730 --> 00:18:07,980
Uh,
I did not notice that per se.

445
00:18:08,070 --> 00:18:08,903
I did notice that what I noticed in the 
one thing that is I've done it is the 

446
00:18:11,971 --> 00:18:15,570
reason I will continue doing hot yoga or
yoga in general maybe,

447
00:18:15,571 --> 00:18:18,460
but probably hot yoga.
So I like the sweat is um,

448
00:18:18,720 --> 00:18:20,220
my feet are stronger.
Yeah.

449
00:18:20,280 --> 00:18:22,050
Like we're a lot stronger.
Like I,

450
00:18:22,410 --> 00:18:23,243
I was going to say to Bobby Kelly,
I was going to text him and go him and 

451
00:18:24,961 --> 00:18:25,794
you should start going to hot yoga.
He has the same problem with plantar 

452
00:18:27,601 --> 00:18:28,434
fasciitis that I do and go.
It really has strengthened my feet and 

453
00:18:31,111 --> 00:18:33,120
when I run now I have no pain in my 
feet.

454
00:18:33,330 --> 00:18:34,740
Yeah.
It makes a big difference.

455
00:18:35,080 --> 00:18:36,810
Is Bobby still heavy?
Oh yeah.

456
00:18:36,811 --> 00:18:37,950
He's not,
he's going on a diet.

457
00:18:38,530 --> 00:18:40,110
I was,
I was going to say to score.

458
00:18:40,111 --> 00:18:41,730
We should fast shame him and get him 
healthy.

459
00:18:42,660 --> 00:18:43,493
Yeah.

460
00:18:44,270 --> 00:18:46,340
I'm not that close to them.
I can't fuck with them.

461
00:18:46,341 --> 00:18:47,174
I can fuck with you guys.
You gotta to know who you could fuck 

462
00:18:51,081 --> 00:18:52,310
with and who's going to take it 
seriously.

463
00:18:52,311 --> 00:18:54,110
Like I feel like I can't fuck with Aria 
anymore.

464
00:18:54,320 --> 00:18:55,153
Like he takes it seriously.
He just needs to get over the hump of 

465
00:18:58,161 --> 00:18:59,270
hot yoga.
He needs a,

466
00:18:59,300 --> 00:19:02,180
he needs to get high.
It needs a little weed in a hug.

467
00:19:02,181 --> 00:19:04,430
He might need a little weed.
We love you are.

468
00:19:04,720 --> 00:19:06,770
I love you.
Are you just fucking with you?

469
00:19:06,920 --> 00:19:09,790
But he took it to heart.
I think like when all the uh,

470
00:19:09,890 --> 00:19:10,360
res,
uh,

471
00:19:10,360 --> 00:19:13,880
Welcher Shit when people were getting 
mad at him and attacking him online.

472
00:19:14,360 --> 00:19:17,850
When people find a little sore spot or a
little area where they can attack you,

473
00:19:17,851 --> 00:19:18,684
they go after.
They don't understand like how many 

474
00:19:21,111 --> 00:19:23,450
people were going after you guys?
When you.

475
00:19:23,451 --> 00:19:24,284
Were you doing Thomas Fat Burns fat?
Like you guys were going after each 

476
00:19:26,661 --> 00:19:29,690
other for a joke,
but people were jumping in for serious?

477
00:19:29,980 --> 00:19:31,300
Yeah.
People say really hateful things.

478
00:19:31,360 --> 00:19:32,193
There's a website that some guy has.
I guess he believes it's a comedy 

479
00:19:35,380 --> 00:19:37,930
website,
but it just is really nasty things about

480
00:19:37,931 --> 00:19:39,160
me.
And then he's like,

481
00:19:39,161 --> 00:19:41,470
just websites were savages,
savagery only.

482
00:19:41,740 --> 00:19:42,760
And I'm like,
Hey man,

483
00:19:42,850 --> 00:19:45,220
I'm a professional comedian.
I know the funniest people in the world.

484
00:19:45,460 --> 00:19:46,293
Those aren't really like great jokes.
Like they're really like birth children 

485
00:19:49,121 --> 00:19:50,760
will die alone.
Like,

486
00:19:50,970 --> 00:19:52,210
like,
oh cool man,

487
00:19:52,211 --> 00:19:55,780
thanks on.
That was the one thing was like,

488
00:19:56,050 --> 00:19:59,350
I dunno,
but also you gotta realize that these,

489
00:19:59,490 --> 00:20:00,323
these people,
a lot of these people that are throwing 

490
00:20:01,611 --> 00:20:06,400
in there molotov cocktails in the party,
they don't like.

491
00:20:06,460 --> 00:20:07,293
They just want to get a response.
They just want you to hurt you so that 

492
00:20:09,581 --> 00:20:10,414
you can respond.
Like that's the one thing that I will 

493
00:20:12,131 --> 00:20:16,300
say like ours has been pretty invisible 
on my instagram comments.

494
00:20:16,840 --> 00:20:19,360
Like he's going right back at people.
Fuck you.

495
00:20:19,390 --> 00:20:20,980
I'm not a welter.
Fuck you.

496
00:20:21,400 --> 00:20:22,131
And I.
part of Me Goes,

497
00:20:22,131 --> 00:20:22,961
oh,
you don't even read them.

498
00:20:22,961 --> 00:20:25,930
I don't read the comments anymore.
Everything that with Tom and Bert is fat

499
00:20:25,931 --> 00:20:26,764
thing.
I stopped reading comments altogether 

500
00:20:27,580 --> 00:20:28,391
because I was like,
oh,

501
00:20:28,391 --> 00:20:29,320
they don't.
I make my kids.

502
00:20:29,321 --> 00:20:30,640
I go,
don't touch my comments.

503
00:20:30,700 --> 00:20:32,410
You guys all worked out some sort of a 
deal,

504
00:20:32,411 --> 00:20:34,120
right?
Like Ari is going to pay for something.

505
00:20:34,240 --> 00:20:37,210
He's already.
That's the other part is like Ari had.

506
00:20:37,870 --> 00:20:42,160
I don't know why he bounced out of Asia.
I think he wanted to go on the trip with

507
00:20:42,161 --> 00:20:42,994
us,
but he'd already planned this trip to 

508
00:20:43,661 --> 00:20:44,620
Asia.
She was like,

509
00:20:44,621 --> 00:20:49,621
I'll take care of you when we get back,
and so I think we're to the superbowl in

510
00:20:49,810 --> 00:20:50,643
February or going to the NFC 
championship in January and he's going 

511
00:20:54,430 --> 00:20:56,590
to pay for it or is nothing but fluid 
money.

512
00:20:56,860 --> 00:20:57,693
So He's,
he's got no dependence and we've all 

513
00:20:59,860 --> 00:21:04,180
known that and part of me like I,
I kind of enjoyed the.

514
00:21:04,330 --> 00:21:06,940
I kind of enjoyed the Welsh moniker.
Yeah.

515
00:21:06,941 --> 00:21:07,774
But he didn't,
but I didn't enjoy being called fucking 

516
00:21:10,570 --> 00:21:12,700
the GFC with Tom posted when Ralph,
he died.

517
00:21:13,190 --> 00:21:16,130
No one's seen it.
No.

518
00:21:16,180 --> 00:21:19,120
Can you pull up his fucking instagram by
the way?

519
00:21:21,000 --> 00:21:25,410
I didn't enjoy this figure.
Look.

520
00:21:25,450 --> 00:21:26,141
What does it say?
Oh,

521
00:21:26,141 --> 00:21:26,974
Jesus Christ.
So has had to hear about the passing of 

522
00:21:28,631 --> 00:21:30,220
Ralphie May.
His heart was bigger than his stomach.

523
00:21:30,221 --> 00:21:31,054
Honestly.
I've always been intrigued by comments 

524
00:21:31,750 --> 00:21:34,240
were kind of Larry's offstage.
What does total sweetheart?

525
00:21:34,270 --> 00:21:35,710
Every time I saw him,
a big hug Ralphie,

526
00:21:35,740 --> 00:21:38,590
and it's a picture of fucking me.
Wow.

527
00:21:38,650 --> 00:21:41,950
And you're smelling something with beer 
in your underwear.

528
00:21:41,951 --> 00:21:44,880
And drinking fireball.
We're Jack Daniels and affiliate.

529
00:21:44,890 --> 00:21:46,840
Preston and Steve,
are you on a radio show?

530
00:21:46,860 --> 00:21:48,100
You're on.
The other guys are great.

531
00:21:48,130 --> 00:21:48,963
Yeah,
they are on the other side is what are 

532
00:21:50,621 --> 00:21:54,300
those shorts?
They are Shyness d,

533
00:21:54,420 --> 00:21:57,310
a bathing suit.
It's a gene bathing suit.

534
00:21:57,790 --> 00:21:58,623
Jesus and MTI Chomolungma.
Ding Dong was on the pot on the show 

535
00:22:01,331 --> 00:22:02,410
with you.
He was on the show too.

536
00:22:02,411 --> 00:22:03,244
And he was.
He like,

537
00:22:03,280 --> 00:22:04,700
he's a really cool isn't.
It?

538
00:22:04,720 --> 00:22:06,580
Was really cool.
Really interesting.

539
00:22:06,640 --> 00:22:08,320
That guy knocked it out of the park 
once.

540
00:22:09,160 --> 00:22:11,170
I would argue twice.
I wouldn't tell you a couple of times.

541
00:22:11,270 --> 00:22:13,870
Uh,
the fucking signs with Mel Gibson.

542
00:22:14,050 --> 00:22:14,883
Oh,
I thought that one socked swinging for 

543
00:22:15,791 --> 00:22:19,130
the fences.
One wasn't bad.

544
00:22:19,420 --> 00:22:20,253
Uh,
which one is the one who plants come to 

545
00:22:21,191 --> 00:22:21,660
kill,
you know,

546
00:22:21,660 --> 00:22:22,620
split.
And that was,

547
00:22:22,950 --> 00:22:26,150
that was that good.
But this is sequel to that unbreakable.

548
00:22:26,151 --> 00:22:26,870
Oh,
you know what I'm like,

549
00:22:26,870 --> 00:22:28,060
don't say,
I'll say twice.

550
00:22:28,061 --> 00:22:30,670
I liked that elevator one.
The devil was in the elevator.

551
00:22:31,890 --> 00:22:33,040
You see that one either.
It was pretty good.

552
00:22:33,370 --> 00:22:35,230
Yeah.
But the first one,

553
00:22:35,290 --> 00:22:37,900
six cents,
that was fucking great to me.

554
00:22:37,901 --> 00:22:40,780
And a black guy sat in the lobby,
just have random black guy,

555
00:22:40,900 --> 00:22:45,310
a random black guy who's sitting behind 
me and we both realized that he was dead

556
00:22:45,311 --> 00:22:46,144
at the same time and we lost our shit 
and then walked out to the lobby 

557
00:22:49,271 --> 00:22:51,040
together and started.
I didn't know this guy.

558
00:22:51,280 --> 00:22:52,840
I said,
this is the coolest thing about a movie.

559
00:22:52,990 --> 00:22:55,230
Me and this guy had nothing in common 
where he's got covered,

560
00:22:55,240 --> 00:22:56,073
he's dreads,
tattoos and me and him sat in the lobby 

561
00:22:58,150 --> 00:22:59,500
and broke down the movie.
I didn't know him,

562
00:22:59,501 --> 00:23:01,810
but we were just sharing our 
realizations together.

563
00:23:02,380 --> 00:23:03,520
I was like,
I was like,

564
00:23:03,521 --> 00:23:03,821
wait,
wait,

565
00:23:03,821 --> 00:23:04,660
wait,
hold on one second.

566
00:23:04,840 --> 00:23:05,840
Hold on.
So what?

567
00:23:06,020 --> 00:23:07,510
And like both.
And I was,

568
00:23:07,570 --> 00:23:08,403
oh,
it was one of my favorite experiences 

569
00:23:08,981 --> 00:23:09,450
after a movie.

570
00:23:09,450 --> 00:23:11,710
It's like when total strangers get 
together and they're like,

571
00:23:11,890 --> 00:23:12,723
shut up,
hold on.

572
00:23:12,730 --> 00:23:13,570
Wait,
what happened?

573
00:23:13,650 --> 00:23:14,483
Oh,
it was great.

574
00:23:15,820 --> 00:23:16,653
Yeah.
Those movies where people don't know 

575
00:23:17,291 --> 00:23:19,320
they're dead or weird,
like beetle juice.

576
00:23:20,260 --> 00:23:21,520
Remember that?
Oh yeah,

577
00:23:21,630 --> 00:23:24,580
I remember they died in the river.
The car fell in the river.

578
00:23:24,820 --> 00:23:28,690
I don't like movies like beetle juice or
like a or like Charlie and the chocolate

579
00:23:28,691 --> 00:23:31,180
factory.
There were the new one.

580
00:23:31,450 --> 00:23:32,283
I don't like that.
I can't watch anything where there's a 

581
00:23:34,961 --> 00:23:38,500
little bit of fantasy fantasy type 
thing.

582
00:23:39,190 --> 00:23:40,540
Does that make sense?
No,

583
00:23:40,690 --> 00:23:41,523
I couldn't.
I could not watch Charlie and the 

584
00:23:42,191 --> 00:23:43,760
chocolate factory when I was a kid.
Oh,

585
00:23:43,820 --> 00:23:44,930
the old one?
Yeah.

586
00:23:45,230 --> 00:23:46,970
I never saw the new ones.
I wouldn't watch it.

587
00:23:47,360 --> 00:23:49,820
The new one was a thing.
It was just called Willy Wonka.

588
00:23:49,821 --> 00:23:52,130
Right.
Was anyone called the Johnny Depp One?

589
00:23:52,370 --> 00:23:53,420
He tied like this.

590
00:23:53,460 --> 00:23:56,340
The way around.
That came from a book called Charlie and

591
00:23:56,341 --> 00:23:58,310
chocolate factory.
The first movie was Willy Wonka and then

592
00:23:58,311 --> 00:24:01,370
the remake was the one with Johnny Depp 
is Charlie and the chocolate factory?

593
00:24:02,370 --> 00:24:02,711
Yeah.
What?

594
00:24:02,711 --> 00:24:03,544
What don't you like about those?
I don't know that like a alison 

595
00:24:05,630 --> 00:24:08,840
wonderland.
Anything about like.

596
00:24:08,900 --> 00:24:12,650
I don't know if it's like a bad trip 
type fantasy.

597
00:24:13,280 --> 00:24:14,330
They freak me out.
Man.

598
00:24:14,540 --> 00:24:15,373
Did you see the new alice in wonderland 
with Johnny Depp and he played the mad 

599
00:24:17,151 --> 00:24:18,290
hatter.
I won't watch it.

600
00:24:18,320 --> 00:24:21,050
It's great.
I enjoy the shit out of it.

601
00:24:21,320 --> 00:24:22,280
It's really fun.
Yeah,

602
00:24:22,281 --> 00:24:24,590
it's fun.
You just freak out.

603
00:24:25,100 --> 00:24:25,933
Yeah.
Like there was a movie that really 

604
00:24:26,691 --> 00:24:27,524
freaked me out.
I think it was called clown about this 

605
00:24:29,061 --> 00:24:31,120
dad who,
uh,

606
00:24:31,550 --> 00:24:33,780
gets his kid a clown for his birthday in
the cloud.

607
00:24:33,781 --> 00:24:34,614
Didn't show up,
so he goes down to the basement and he 

608
00:24:37,341 --> 00:24:40,790
finds a clown outfit and he puts it on 
and he's the clown for the kid.

609
00:24:41,420 --> 00:24:45,440
And then that night he can't get the 
nose off and it meshes into his body.

610
00:24:45,441 --> 00:24:47,810
I couldn't.
Oh,

611
00:24:47,960 --> 00:24:52,130
do this movie is pretty good.
That's a good movie.

612
00:24:52,190 --> 00:24:53,570
Fucked me.
I couldn't watch it.

613
00:24:53,571 --> 00:24:55,520
I started watching it and I was like,
no,

614
00:24:55,521 --> 00:24:57,110
I can't tell me a trailer.
Young Jamie.

615
00:24:57,260 --> 00:24:59,600
Oh my God.
He freaking out.

616
00:24:59,780 --> 00:25:00,140
Yeah.
This,

617
00:25:00,140 --> 00:25:00,973
I don't like clowns,
but see the green inferno he made about 

618
00:25:03,201 --> 00:25:06,890
the cannibals and South America,
I think.

619
00:25:06,920 --> 00:25:08,360
No,
it was fucking good.

620
00:25:08,810 --> 00:25:12,200
It's on Netflix I think.
Or is it a horror movie?

621
00:25:12,230 --> 00:25:12,710
Yeah,
yeah,

622
00:25:12,710 --> 00:25:15,200
for sure.
People are dying as gruesome.

623
00:25:15,350 --> 00:25:17,630
He's really good.
He made that a hostile movie.

624
00:25:18,050 --> 00:25:20,070
He's also in,
in his pastor.

625
00:25:20,660 --> 00:25:22,750
He was bad ass niggas.
The bear Jew,

626
00:25:23,220 --> 00:25:25,250
you know what I keep hearing is fucking 
amazing.

627
00:25:25,280 --> 00:25:26,113
Is the new blade runner movie,
but it's not doing good in the box 

628
00:25:27,681 --> 00:25:28,514
office.
Apparently they had to sign 

629
00:25:29,301 --> 00:25:30,134
nondisclosures when they went to review 
it where they couldn't reveal anything 

630
00:25:33,471 --> 00:25:34,970
about the movie.
Alright,

631
00:25:35,220 --> 00:25:36,650
give me a.
give me some volume here.

632
00:25:36,980 --> 00:25:38,880
We'll put the trailer here.
Oh,

633
00:25:47,680 --> 00:25:48,910
everything's gonna be fine.

634
00:26:19,800 --> 00:26:20,633
Whoa.

635
00:26:29,280 --> 00:26:30,340
Skin of a demon.

636
00:26:36,060 --> 00:26:41,060
Hello?
Wow

637
00:27:16,260 --> 00:27:17,860
Dude.
You can.

638
00:27:33,260 --> 00:27:36,750
The sound is very loud.
Distorted downstairs.

639
00:27:38,270 --> 00:27:43,270
I want to see my number one birthday.
Whoa.

640
00:27:43,630 --> 00:27:45,930
Uh,
fuck that dude.

641
00:27:46,080 --> 00:27:49,170
I'm watching that tonight.
Are you kidding me?

642
00:27:49,200 --> 00:27:50,033
He makes.
He's got some really good movies that 

643
00:27:51,031 --> 00:27:52,380
have come out over the last couple of 
years.

644
00:27:52,700 --> 00:27:53,520
What?
What else?

645
00:27:53,520 --> 00:27:56,460
What is he famous for?
I believe hostile is the first one.

646
00:27:56,461 --> 00:27:58,400
He made that motherfucker.
I'm not watching this

647
00:27:58,420 --> 00:28:02,290
moving then clown too.
There was a part two.

648
00:28:02,860 --> 00:28:06,920
He came back to watch the trailer for 
clown too.

649
00:28:07,160 --> 00:28:11,130
Made this looks like a joke.
Can ask.

650
00:28:11,650 --> 00:28:12,250
Oh,
is it?

651
00:28:12,250 --> 00:28:14,170
I don't know.
Look pretty fucking violent.

652
00:28:14,840 --> 00:28:16,450
Get deep in there.
See what happens.

653
00:28:16,451 --> 00:28:19,090
So ha ha ha.
I have the outfit on,

654
00:28:24,120 --> 00:28:29,120
maybe not same people.
Same people.

655
00:28:34,470 --> 00:28:38,250
This is the 2017 version.
Just time for us to binge.

656
00:28:39,000 --> 00:28:40,410
This is what we're going to do in the 
new studio.

657
00:28:40,411 --> 00:28:41,000
Bert,

658
00:28:41,000 --> 00:28:41,833
we're going to watch some fucked up 
movies and do like fight companions for 

659
00:28:44,271 --> 00:28:47,060
fucked up movies.
Funny movies.

660
00:28:48,040 --> 00:28:48,780
Oh,
it's not real.

661
00:28:48,780 --> 00:28:52,110
Oh son of a bitch fan me.
Fuck

662
00:28:52,330 --> 00:28:53,090
man.
I can't.

663
00:28:53,090 --> 00:28:55,210
I'm scary movies.
I get rugged,

664
00:28:55,211 --> 00:28:56,044
legit,
scared.

665
00:28:56,410 --> 00:28:57,243
Like I get to the point where I go,
I don't know why I'm jumping out of an 

666
00:28:59,561 --> 00:29:00,311
airplane.
I go,

667
00:29:00,311 --> 00:29:01,600
I don't know why I'm doing this.
I don't.

668
00:29:01,601 --> 00:29:03,970
I don't know if I enjoyed this.
Like I,

669
00:29:04,020 --> 00:29:04,853
I saw the when I remember seeing the 
ring in the movie theater and I was 

670
00:29:07,511 --> 00:29:09,430
screaming so bad that people were 
laughing.

671
00:29:10,510 --> 00:29:12,570
Why do you get scared?
I don't know.

672
00:29:12,640 --> 00:29:14,890
Did you see the new it movie?
No,

673
00:29:15,550 --> 00:29:17,260
I would never.
I saw the original.

674
00:29:17,920 --> 00:29:19,270
I was like,
I was.

675
00:29:19,271 --> 00:29:21,880
I was like,
Stephen King is probably pretty good.

676
00:29:21,881 --> 00:29:25,300
Thriller and the clown showed up,
but I couldn't stop watching it.

677
00:29:25,301 --> 00:29:26,860
The original homes on TV,
wasn't it?

678
00:29:27,220 --> 00:29:28,960
Yeah,
it was a mini series or something.

679
00:29:28,961 --> 00:29:29,410
Yeah.

680
00:29:29,410 --> 00:29:30,910
Yeah.
That bothered you that much.

681
00:29:32,050 --> 00:29:34,140
I don't like clowns.
Clown makeup.

682
00:29:34,141 --> 00:29:35,230
I'll never happened.
Really?

683
00:29:35,350 --> 00:29:36,183
I did once I got mauled by a bowl 
because the only time I've ever put 

684
00:29:38,141 --> 00:29:39,250
clown makeup on.
Oh,

685
00:29:39,400 --> 00:29:42,190
go to Eddie Bravo's instagram page

686
00:29:42,220 --> 00:29:44,320
and check out this new bull fighting 
thing.

687
00:29:44,321 --> 00:29:45,154
They're doing their new doing this new 
bull fighting thing where they don't 

688
00:29:48,611 --> 00:29:49,444
actually fight the bowls.
These are acrobats and they stand in 

689
00:29:52,631 --> 00:29:55,360
front of the bowl.
The bowl charges them and they flip over

690
00:29:55,361 --> 00:30:00,100
the fucking bull dude.
People are taking shit to a totally next

691
00:30:00,101 --> 00:30:01,240
level.
Watch this.

692
00:30:02,340 --> 00:30:03,480
Oh,
shut up.

693
00:30:03,550 --> 00:30:05,800
Yeah.
Nonviolent bullfighting.

694
00:30:06,430 --> 00:30:09,970
So they don't kill the bull and like 
this is probably,

695
00:30:10,180 --> 00:30:11,013
first of all,
it's way more interesting and I don't 

696
00:30:13,871 --> 00:30:16,690
feel bad watching it.
I mean I'm going to feel bad if this guy

697
00:30:16,691 --> 00:30:18,880
eventually gets a horn through his 
asshole,

698
00:30:19,000 --> 00:30:22,360
which is probably going to happen,
but I'm not rooting for the bowl.

699
00:30:22,480 --> 00:30:26,950
Like I'm kind of rooting for the bull 
when I see matadors not even kind of.

700
00:30:27,190 --> 00:30:29,020
I think bullfighting is completely 
retarded.

701
00:30:29,290 --> 00:30:32,050
I think if you want to shoot a bull and 
kill it and eat it,

702
00:30:32,290 --> 00:30:33,123
I get that,
but you should do it humanely and you 

703
00:30:34,751 --> 00:30:35,584
should,
you know,

704
00:30:36,130 --> 00:30:38,080
you should do it where you're,
you're,

705
00:30:38,081 --> 00:30:38,861
you know,
you're doing,

706
00:30:38,861 --> 00:30:40,750
you shoot the ball in the head or 
wherever you're going to shoot it in the

707
00:30:40,751 --> 00:30:42,430
heart and get it over with.

708
00:30:42,430 --> 00:30:47,050
But they stabbed those things with these
long spears and they poisoned them.

709
00:30:47,051 --> 00:30:49,480
They do a lot of shit.
But this is to me,

710
00:30:49,481 --> 00:30:53,890
way more dangerous.
Way more brave.

711
00:30:54,130 --> 00:30:57,110
Way More interesting to watch,
I would say.

712
00:30:57,190 --> 00:31:00,040
Which addresses a major concern amongst 
animal rights activists.

713
00:31:00,041 --> 00:31:03,680
What does the Bulls aren't getting hurt?
But I don't.

714
00:31:04,270 --> 00:31:06,100
This is nonviolent bullfighting.
Oh,

715
00:31:06,101 --> 00:31:07,840
I think we're just watching a loop.
That's what it is.

716
00:31:07,900 --> 00:31:10,480
So it says a Ole.
Well,

717
00:31:10,570 --> 00:31:14,980
this is the guide DPK,
DP Four K dot m.

718
00:31:15,280 --> 00:31:18,190
I follow him on instagram and he's a 
radical anti,

719
00:31:18,250 --> 00:31:19,990
uh,
like,

720
00:31:20,000 --> 00:31:22,600
uh,
anti factory farming,

721
00:31:22,660 --> 00:31:25,030
animal rights activists.
Guy Or girl.

722
00:31:25,031 --> 00:31:26,680
I don't know if it's a guy or a girl.
Honestly,

723
00:31:26,870 --> 00:31:28,830
I'm just sexist.
But uh,

724
00:31:29,350 --> 00:31:32,110
his page or this person's page,
her page,

725
00:31:32,111 --> 00:31:32,944
whatever,
is just filled with a animal rights 

726
00:31:35,411 --> 00:31:37,360
stuff.
It's always animal rights stuff.

727
00:31:37,450 --> 00:31:40,940
We went to a bullfight in Madrid or 
Barcelona.

728
00:31:40,970 --> 00:31:42,610
Me and my buddy,
we told him we were 22.

729
00:31:42,880 --> 00:31:44,230
We didn't know what it was.
We were like,

730
00:31:44,231 --> 00:31:45,120
yeah,
we got to go to a bullfight.

731
00:31:45,130 --> 00:31:46,630
Right man.
We were.

732
00:31:46,780 --> 00:31:48,600
Both of us were like,
this is really upsetting.

733
00:31:49,390 --> 00:31:50,890
We were kids.
That's when you'd be like,

734
00:31:50,891 --> 00:31:52,330
Oh fuck yeah.
But both of us were like,

735
00:31:52,630 --> 00:31:53,160
oh,
they killed them.

736
00:31:53,160 --> 00:31:57,190
Like it really is up really a sad with 
this guy put up the.

737
00:31:57,191 --> 00:32:00,220
I found out about this guy,
this animal rights guy.

738
00:32:00,250 --> 00:32:02,230
And I followed his page because he put 
up a,

739
00:32:02,380 --> 00:32:06,910
a picture of a friend of my friend Adam 
Green trees in Hawaii,

740
00:32:07,420 --> 00:32:08,890
Hawaii,
Australia,

741
00:32:09,310 --> 00:32:12,430
because in Australia they hunt feral 
cats.

742
00:32:12,880 --> 00:32:15,670
And this guy was holding up a cat like a
house cat.

743
00:32:15,710 --> 00:32:16,543
They shot and killed.
And the reason why they do that is 

744
00:32:19,271 --> 00:32:20,104
because feral house cats in Australia 
are an invasive species and they are 

745
00:32:24,820 --> 00:32:29,710
devastating the local ecology.
They destroy ground nesting birds.

746
00:32:29,711 --> 00:32:33,400
They kill everything and there's a large
population of them.

747
00:32:33,401 --> 00:32:37,390
They actually have a bounty on feral 
cats in Australia.

748
00:32:37,870 --> 00:32:40,340
See they've,
they made some terrible

749
00:32:40,340 --> 00:32:41,173
mistakes with conservation in Australia 
and one of the mistakes they've done 

750
00:32:45,230 --> 00:32:48,920
like over and over again is introducing 
invasive species to the continent.

751
00:32:49,250 --> 00:32:52,310
See Australia,
didn't the predators in Australia are.

752
00:32:52,800 --> 00:32:53,633
They used to have the Tasmanian tiger.
They have dingoes and they have 

753
00:32:56,511 --> 00:32:59,210
crocodiles which are just the fucking 
monsters.

754
00:32:59,211 --> 00:33:00,044
They ruthless.
They have like serious saltwater 

755
00:33:01,521 --> 00:33:03,770
crocodiles and then of course sharks on 
the outside.

756
00:33:04,280 --> 00:33:05,113
But um,
then they introduced a bunch of animals 

757
00:33:07,911 --> 00:33:10,250
to both Australia and New Zealand to 
hunt.

758
00:33:10,580 --> 00:33:15,410
They introduced a fallow deer and a 
stags and a lot of different things.

759
00:33:15,411 --> 00:33:18,620
Tags and mostly in New Zealand,
but in pigs,

760
00:33:18,621 --> 00:33:20,990
wild pigs and these fucking things went 
everywhere.

761
00:33:20,991 --> 00:33:21,824
They're all over the place.
They also introduced a bunch of 

762
00:33:24,321 --> 00:33:26,750
different like rabbits and things along 
those lines.

763
00:33:26,751 --> 00:33:28,910
And when they did that,
I don't know about rabbits,

764
00:33:29,090 --> 00:33:29,923
forget what it was,
but they brought in cats and foxes to 

765
00:33:33,231 --> 00:33:34,760
deal with some of the other species.

766
00:33:34,760 --> 00:33:37,430
But then the cats and the foxes don't 
just kill the species.

767
00:33:37,431 --> 00:33:39,770
They want them to kill.
They fucking kill all these other things

768
00:33:39,771 --> 00:33:43,430
that had no idea what a cat was like.
There was no feral cats there.

769
00:33:43,790 --> 00:33:46,610
And so now they have a real problem with
them where they just,

770
00:33:46,670 --> 00:33:47,180
they,
they,

771
00:33:47,180 --> 00:33:48,590
they have,
they run the risk.

772
00:33:48,591 --> 00:33:50,450
I know this guy who's an animal rights 
activist,

773
00:33:50,780 --> 00:33:54,170
his thought is he seeing this monster 
shooting someone's pet,

774
00:33:54,410 --> 00:33:58,250
but it's most likely not someone's pet.
It's most likely a feral cat.

775
00:33:58,251 --> 00:33:59,084
There's thousands of them,
hundreds of thousands of them in 

776
00:34:00,921 --> 00:34:03,290
Australia.
And they're a giant issue.

777
00:34:03,330 --> 00:34:03,710
They,
they,

778
00:34:03,710 --> 00:34:04,543
they hire people to kill them because 
they're devastating all these animals 

779
00:34:08,121 --> 00:34:12,740
that had no idea what a cat was.
So it's a much more complex issue than a

780
00:34:12,741 --> 00:34:15,590
lot of these animal rights activists 
understand.

781
00:34:15,800 --> 00:34:18,200
And I was thrown off because,
uh,

782
00:34:18,260 --> 00:34:19,093
Adam Green tree,
my buddy gave me a bowhunting magazine 

783
00:34:21,801 --> 00:34:22,634
from Australia when I was there visiting
him and I was going through it on the 

784
00:34:24,951 --> 00:34:28,880
plane and there's pictures of guys 
holding up cats and they shot.

785
00:34:29,450 --> 00:34:30,283
And I was like,
what in the fuck is wrong with you 

786
00:34:31,551 --> 00:34:32,384
Australians?
But when it's explained to you by 

787
00:34:34,761 --> 00:34:37,190
someone who lives there,
it's not like we hate house cats.

788
00:34:37,220 --> 00:34:40,790
These are not house cats.
This is like going out and shooting,

789
00:34:40,820 --> 00:34:41,653
you know,
a bobcat that's been killing all the 

790
00:34:44,001 --> 00:34:45,640
local grouse,
you know,

791
00:34:45,650 --> 00:34:46,483
like if you introduced a cat into the 
area that wasn't supposed to be there 

792
00:34:49,340 --> 00:34:51,320
and it was devastating all the other 
animals.

793
00:34:51,410 --> 00:34:52,243
So you have one of two options.
Either you just let everything go 

794
00:34:54,141 --> 00:34:54,974
extinct and don't handle it,
or you try to clean up the mess that 

795
00:34:58,131 --> 00:35:01,700
your ancestors sort of started before 
you were like nutria.

796
00:35:01,760 --> 00:35:03,410
Yeah.
Nutri is a good example.

797
00:35:03,411 --> 00:35:03,951
Yeah.
Yeah.

798
00:35:03,951 --> 00:35:04,784
It's a very good example.
Those fucking things is giant rat 

799
00:35:06,681 --> 00:35:07,340
things.

800
00:35:07,340 --> 00:35:08,150
By the way.
I,

801
00:35:08,150 --> 00:35:10,670
I have to,
I have to take two seconds talking about

802
00:35:10,671 --> 00:35:13,100
Adam Green Tree.
He's like my new favorite obsession.

803
00:35:13,160 --> 00:35:14,090
He's awesome.
He,

804
00:35:14,091 --> 00:35:16,250
uh,
you tweeted out,

805
00:35:16,251 --> 00:35:18,110
you got to watch my buddy on this hunt.
When we went,

806
00:35:18,111 --> 00:35:20,870
I was in Australia and I was like,
all my time zones.

807
00:35:20,871 --> 00:35:21,704
We're all fucked up.
And I was not sleeping and I got 

808
00:35:23,781 --> 00:35:25,310
obsessed with that hunt.
He did.

809
00:35:25,311 --> 00:35:27,380
Started in Colorado,
ended up in Montana.

810
00:35:27,410 --> 00:35:28,243
Yeah.
I got obsessed with it and it was so 

811
00:35:29,841 --> 00:35:30,674
much fun to watch.
And then when he got off the hunt I was 

812
00:35:32,421 --> 00:35:32,961
like,
well fuck,

813
00:35:32,961 --> 00:35:34,090
I guess I'll just wait for the next 
month.

814
00:35:34,120 --> 00:35:38,460
We'll explain what the thing is.
He was so low he will backpacking

815
00:35:38,520 --> 00:35:41,100
and he was covering and oh by the way,
I speak big.

816
00:35:41,260 --> 00:35:42,093
I'm probably wrong.
Views covering like 15 miles a day on 

817
00:35:45,220 --> 00:35:46,053
easily easy easily.
And not just a flat walk up mountains 

818
00:35:49,681 --> 00:35:52,130
because you gotta you gotta glass.
These things I'm about to.

819
00:35:52,150 --> 00:35:54,510
I feel like I know I'm a hunter from 
watching this video.

820
00:35:54,540 --> 00:35:58,270
Every day he would post on his insta 
stories and,

821
00:35:58,370 --> 00:35:59,203
and he was looking,
he find elk and he was hunting elk and 

822
00:36:01,981 --> 00:36:04,500
he would find elk,
but it wasn't the one he wanted.

823
00:36:04,830 --> 00:36:06,380
And like he'd see this,
how can I.

824
00:36:06,420 --> 00:36:09,920
he's like six point six,
six point.

825
00:36:09,950 --> 00:36:11,430
Yeah.
And he's like six point,

826
00:36:11,610 --> 00:36:13,290
but it's not the right one.
It was.

827
00:36:13,370 --> 00:36:15,390
They were young.
You didn't want to shoot a young animal,

828
00:36:15,410 --> 00:36:17,490
do you want her to shoot an old mature 
animal,

829
00:36:17,700 --> 00:36:20,730
and then at one point there was a bear 
tracking him and I'm like,

830
00:36:20,820 --> 00:36:21,830
yeah,
not just tracking him,

831
00:36:21,840 --> 00:36:24,060
charging him,
and he was getting.

832
00:36:24,110 --> 00:36:24,943
He was doing an instagram story of these
bears charging him and in one of the 

833
00:36:27,091 --> 00:36:27,924
instagram pictures it's him holding up a
gun and you see the bear in the 

834
00:36:31,561 --> 00:36:32,394
background standing at a time legs.
When I posted that his likes are his 

835
00:36:35,821 --> 00:36:38,910
followers went from the beginning.
When you started this quest,

836
00:36:38,940 --> 00:36:41,160
it was at 75,000
followers.

837
00:36:41,520 --> 00:36:45,060
By the end of this trip he had doubled 
to over 150.

838
00:36:45,061 --> 00:36:47,810
What is he at now?
Adam.green

839
00:36:47,811 --> 00:36:48,644
tree.
He just renewed his vowels with his 

840
00:36:49,771 --> 00:36:53,670
beautiful wife,
Kim Australia.

841
00:36:53,700 --> 00:36:55,680
I feel like I know the guy like you have
never met him.

842
00:36:56,010 --> 00:36:57,210
Oh,
I got to introduce to them.

843
00:36:57,211 --> 00:36:58,500
He's going to be here.
Yeah,

844
00:36:58,590 --> 00:36:59,550
he's gonna.
Be here soon.

845
00:36:59,850 --> 00:37:00,690
Um,
what does he got now?

846
00:37:00,691 --> 00:37:02,100
Yeah,
162.

847
00:37:02,101 --> 00:37:03,110
Is that what it says?
Yeah.

848
00:37:03,210 --> 00:37:05,730
When we started,
when he started this trip,

849
00:37:05,731 --> 00:37:06,564
rather look at those pictures of a 
grizzly bear footprints in the ground 

850
00:37:10,050 --> 00:37:11,220
right next to his footprint.

851
00:37:11,220 --> 00:37:11,941
Fucking,
hey,

852
00:37:11,941 --> 00:37:15,930
look how big those goddamn things are.
And if you're interested in these,

853
00:37:15,931 --> 00:37:17,550
uh,
instagram stories right now,

854
00:37:17,551 --> 00:37:18,384
my friend remy warren just posted 
another crazy instagram story about 

855
00:37:23,071 --> 00:37:23,904
their time on a fog neck island in 
Alaska where they got attacked by a 

856
00:37:30,181 --> 00:37:34,890
giant Kodiak bear.
They got attacked by a 1000 pound bear.

857
00:37:34,891 --> 00:37:38,070
One of the guys wound up riding the bear
on its back.

858
00:37:38,820 --> 00:37:41,520
They bear charged them.
Everybody's scattered.

859
00:37:41,521 --> 00:37:44,910
One of the guys hit the bear in the face
with trekking poles.

860
00:37:45,300 --> 00:37:46,133
One guy got knocked up into the air,
wound up on the bears back as the bear 

861
00:37:49,681 --> 00:37:51,810
was running down the hill for like two 
or three steps.

862
00:37:51,990 --> 00:37:54,420
He was literally riding this bear's 
back.

863
00:37:54,720 --> 00:37:55,511
Who's this guy?
Remy,

864
00:37:55,511 --> 00:37:56,344
what Ramey warrant.
He's another friend of mine who's a one 

865
00:37:58,921 --> 00:38:00,300
of the like.
There's like,

866
00:38:00,440 --> 00:38:01,273
there's a call with him right now,
full of the best bowhunters in the 

867
00:38:03,601 --> 00:38:03,930
world.

868
00:38:03,930 --> 00:38:06,480
And I'm privileged to know,
but Adam is most certainly one of them.

869
00:38:06,481 --> 00:38:07,980
So it was remy,
my favorite,

870
00:38:08,370 --> 00:38:09,203
my all time favorites are always gonna 
be Cameron and Cameron Hanes is 

871
00:38:11,371 --> 00:38:12,480
starting,
that's remy,

872
00:38:12,481 --> 00:38:13,314
like he's got some pictures and videos 
of the hunt that they went on in a fog 

873
00:38:16,891 --> 00:38:18,840
neck,
but he had 'em,

874
00:38:18,900 --> 00:38:22,020
they'd killed an elk and that's the elk 
down there,

875
00:38:22,021 --> 00:38:22,854
the one with one antler and uh,
he had broken off one of his antlers a 

876
00:38:26,520 --> 00:38:31,520
fighting and they were cutting this 
antelope elk up and packing it out.

877
00:38:32,011 --> 00:38:35,950
And then they set it down and they were 
just sitting down eating lunch

878
00:38:36,490 --> 00:38:38,500
and uh,
they didn't have their guns on them.

879
00:38:38,501 --> 00:38:39,334
They didn't,
they just were just unprepared and with 

880
00:38:41,891 --> 00:38:42,724
no warning this 1000 pound bear charged 
them just ran right at them into the 

881
00:38:47,801 --> 00:38:50,500
camp.
Just decided that he wanted that elk and

882
00:38:50,501 --> 00:38:54,380
it was just fucking chaos.
And everybody scattered and thank.

883
00:38:54,460 --> 00:38:55,293
Thankfully everyone was okay,
but they got as close to death as 

884
00:38:58,331 --> 00:38:59,164
possible.
I was talking to me about on the phone 

885
00:39:00,071 --> 00:39:03,520
yesterday was telling me that literally 
inches away from his face,

886
00:39:03,521 --> 00:39:06,240
he was seeing gnashing teeth like inches
away.

887
00:39:06,280 --> 00:39:08,440
Dude,
what the fuck man?

888
00:39:08,520 --> 00:39:12,420
What's even like?
I mean that's like I can't,

889
00:39:13,260 --> 00:39:15,500
I can't wrap my head around just by 
following out of.

890
00:39:15,520 --> 00:39:17,100
I couldn't wrap my head around what he 
was doing.

891
00:39:17,160 --> 00:39:17,993
The idea that he like flew to Montana 
because he didn't like the hunt in 

892
00:39:20,791 --> 00:39:22,170
Colorado.
We flew to Montana.

893
00:39:22,230 --> 00:39:25,530
He drove or drove to Montana and then he
left the car and then just went.

894
00:39:26,010 --> 00:39:27,900
He got lost.
Well he's,

895
00:39:27,901 --> 00:39:28,640
he,
he knows where he's

896
00:39:28,640 --> 00:39:32,020
going because he has,
he uses gps and he knows how to follow.

897
00:39:32,440 --> 00:39:33,273
There's a thing called onyx maps.
You could download the maps to your 

898
00:39:36,201 --> 00:39:39,260
phone and then you can,
you can stretch your phone out.

899
00:39:39,261 --> 00:39:40,820
And he was using a solar pad.

900
00:39:41,860 --> 00:39:44,510
Silence followed all his gear.
Girls Went Kevin.

901
00:39:44,511 --> 00:39:45,344
Then when I came in Sunday,
this is so silly that this is like how 

902
00:39:48,201 --> 00:39:49,670
life works.
And by the way,

903
00:39:50,240 --> 00:39:51,830
I think anyone who's a podcast fatal 
get.

904
00:39:51,831 --> 00:39:52,664
This is unfollowing Adam.
I'm watching the stories and he's shown 

905
00:39:57,111 --> 00:39:58,400
all this pack stuff.
He's got a.

906
00:39:58,450 --> 00:40:01,820
me and the girls were getting ready to 
go to a to Rei and I went,

907
00:40:01,870 --> 00:40:02,220
oh,
I'm gonna.

908
00:40:02,220 --> 00:40:04,130
Get some of his shit.
Like some of this stuff,

909
00:40:04,400 --> 00:40:05,233
because I know he's,
I know that he's only rocking the best 

910
00:40:07,041 --> 00:40:08,830
stuff and the girls were getting ready 
to go.

911
00:40:08,900 --> 00:40:10,700
I'm going to be home that next week.
I'm by myself.

912
00:40:10,970 --> 00:40:13,820
So I go and I start looking at things 
and then I'm watching this stories.

913
00:40:13,940 --> 00:40:14,773
Leanne's watching me and he's like,
he does some video of the sun shining 

914
00:40:17,841 --> 00:40:18,860
and he goes,
look Kim,

915
00:40:19,100 --> 00:40:19,933
it's cameron hanes is smile and I,
I get the joke and I started laughing 

916
00:40:22,610 --> 00:40:23,420
and lenses.

917
00:40:23,420 --> 00:40:25,100
Who the fuck are you watching and who 
the fuck's cameron?

918
00:40:25,101 --> 00:40:26,600
Hey.
And I'm like,

919
00:40:26,601 --> 00:40:28,340
other friends of mine,
I don't even know these dudes,

920
00:40:28,370 --> 00:40:30,310
but I go there but you know,
but I follow them.

921
00:40:30,330 --> 00:40:32,150
They know them.
So I'm giggling.

922
00:40:32,180 --> 00:40:33,260
Well,
you could be friends with them.

923
00:40:33,261 --> 00:40:34,570
I just have to introduce,
you know,

924
00:40:34,840 --> 00:40:35,673
I'd,
I'd,

925
00:40:36,080 --> 00:40:38,150
I'd last one night with Adam who doesn't
drink,

926
00:40:38,151 --> 00:40:39,410
doesn't do drugs.
Great.

927
00:40:39,470 --> 00:40:41,150
I'd be in his camp going.
First of all,

928
00:40:41,480 --> 00:40:42,750
we're not bringing any whiskey out of 
here.

929
00:40:42,770 --> 00:40:44,290
Adam,
we're going to sit here sober and bear's

930
00:40:44,300 --> 00:40:46,330
going to tell you sober right now.
I go,

931
00:40:46,640 --> 00:40:47,890
that was one of the things he was 
saying.

932
00:40:47,900 --> 00:40:49,400
He's like,
no drug,

933
00:40:49,401 --> 00:40:50,750
no drink.
This is what I do.

934
00:40:50,840 --> 00:40:51,673
Well,
he,

935
00:40:52,250 --> 00:40:57,110
his father had a real problem and so he 
is averse to it completely.

936
00:40:57,111 --> 00:40:59,750
I have some friends that have 
experienced alcoholism,

937
00:40:59,751 --> 00:41:03,380
like abusive alcoholism from their 
parents and they have the same feeling.

938
00:41:03,381 --> 00:41:04,830
They just don't want to have anything to
do with it.

939
00:41:04,831 --> 00:41:09,080
It's they see how it just wrecks people 
in ruins people and I'll tell you man,

940
00:41:09,081 --> 00:41:09,914
I don't feel that way because I've 
enjoyed drinking and I've never really 

941
00:41:11,811 --> 00:41:14,960
had a terrible thing happened to me 
because of drinking,

942
00:41:14,961 --> 00:41:19,961
but being sober over these last 12 days 
or whatever the fuck it's been,

943
00:41:20,931 --> 00:41:21,764
and being in comedy clubs every night 
and seeing sloppy drunks like I've seen 

944
00:41:25,941 --> 00:41:29,270
three or four like ridge,
like the other night at the store,

945
00:41:29,300 --> 00:41:33,170
some fucking unbelievably drunk guy 
wanting to have a conversation.

946
00:41:33,260 --> 00:41:35,540
Me from like two inches away.
You know,

947
00:41:35,890 --> 00:41:38,600
that sloppy drunk,
close talk type thing and I'm like,

948
00:41:38,960 --> 00:41:39,793
who the fuck?

949
00:41:39,950 --> 00:41:41,150
Who does this?
Sober?

950
00:41:41,180 --> 00:41:44,600
Zero people like this is one of the 
worst things about alcohol.

951
00:41:44,601 --> 00:41:45,434
It's like people don't understand 
boundaries or how they come off or what 

952
00:41:48,621 --> 00:41:51,320
they sound like and there's bad things 
to.

953
00:41:51,350 --> 00:41:53,370
You're a great drunk by the way,
you know,

954
00:41:53,371 --> 00:41:54,204
you're,
you're like one of my favorite drunks 

955
00:41:55,101 --> 00:41:57,350
because you're so used to it.
You manage it well.

956
00:41:57,351 --> 00:41:58,880
You're like a black belt and being 
drunk.

957
00:41:59,420 --> 00:42:03,710
So it's like with all the problems that 
you've had with your health,

958
00:42:03,740 --> 00:42:06,110
with drinking too much,
you read.

959
00:42:06,260 --> 00:42:08,360
I mean,
you come off like pretty easy.

960
00:42:08,361 --> 00:42:10,610
You're a fun guy to be around when 
you're drinking.

961
00:42:10,880 --> 00:42:11,713
It's not,
you don't have a problem in that sense 

962
00:42:13,760 --> 00:42:16,090
because like we all know like people 
that drink and then just go,

963
00:42:16,220 --> 00:42:18,380
they go dark and they get mean,
you know,

964
00:42:18,500 --> 00:42:20,810
and they get angry.
We've seen that.

965
00:42:21,130 --> 00:42:22,470
Not that,
uh,

966
00:42:22,471 --> 00:42:23,550
that was,
that.

967
00:42:23,551 --> 00:42:24,384
I never have had that.
I think that's also part of the problem 

968
00:42:25,951 --> 00:42:28,300
is that I'm a good drunk and everyone 
enjoys me and I,

969
00:42:28,350 --> 00:42:29,183
I'm a nice guy.
I'm a sweet guy and I think that's the 

970
00:42:30,841 --> 00:42:31,950
reason.
Even my wife's like,

971
00:42:31,951 --> 00:42:34,230
I don't think you have a problem.
I don't think I have a problem.

972
00:42:34,410 --> 00:42:36,320
But like the woman's with me a lot.
Yeah.

973
00:42:36,570 --> 00:42:39,270
I mean she wouldn't be the one to know,
but she's like,

974
00:42:39,330 --> 00:42:44,310
but healthwise has changed my health.
I mean I'm six miles in,

975
00:42:44,340 --> 00:42:46,060
under an hour the other day.
That's great.

976
00:42:46,070 --> 00:42:48,090
That's fast for me.
That's very good.

977
00:42:48,230 --> 00:42:50,700
And it's like.
And so health wise,

978
00:42:50,701 --> 00:42:52,170
I feel amazing.
Yeah.

979
00:42:52,920 --> 00:42:56,600
That's 18 miles in three hours.
Yeah.

980
00:42:57,300 --> 00:42:59,490
Well I couldn't keep that pace and 
imagine if you did.

981
00:42:59,810 --> 00:43:01,200
Yeah.
That's like,

982
00:43:01,440 --> 00:43:05,400
that's really fucking good at it.
In 29 minute and 20 miles of a marathon.

983
00:43:05,550 --> 00:43:08,400
Twenty six.
That's almost a marathon in four hours.

984
00:43:08,820 --> 00:43:09,990
Yeah.
That's amazing.

985
00:43:10,020 --> 00:43:12,780
I'm doing a half marathon.
I signed up for a half marathon.

986
00:43:14,120 --> 00:43:16,590
This is gonna sound silly,
but just to keep myself on the rails.

987
00:43:17,090 --> 00:43:19,470
Like I don't,
I don't want to lose the fitness.

988
00:43:19,471 --> 00:43:21,810
I like food.
I like feeling good.

989
00:43:21,870 --> 00:43:22,480
I like to think

990
00:43:22,480 --> 00:43:25,440
Straw was my question initially.
It just feels like you.

991
00:43:25,500 --> 00:43:28,650
This is a sprint,
this is not a change in your lifestyle.

992
00:43:28,830 --> 00:43:32,250
Like it feel like what I'm worried about
is it's like you're just going to like,

993
00:43:32,251 --> 00:43:33,420
this is great.
I feel great.

994
00:43:33,421 --> 00:43:34,254
I've never felt better and now whew,
off the rails there will be a week of 

995
00:43:37,780 --> 00:43:38,613
that planning,
but it was almost like you're planning 

996
00:43:41,190 --> 00:43:43,440
to go off the rails.
Like this is just like I'm going to keep

997
00:43:43,441 --> 00:43:44,760
it together for a month and then.

998
00:43:45,190 --> 00:43:45,620
No,
I,

999
00:43:45,620 --> 00:43:46,453
I,
I talked to Tom and push about this a 

1000
00:43:47,891 --> 00:43:49,930
lot,
but like I,

1001
00:43:51,100 --> 00:43:54,370
I don't want to stop partying but I 
don't want partying to be.

1002
00:43:54,430 --> 00:43:55,263
I don't want.
I think it got out of control in the 

1003
00:43:56,921 --> 00:43:57,754
sense that like I was,
it was like I get on stage and have a 

1004
00:44:01,331 --> 00:44:02,164
cocktail.
I mean I drank a soda one time on stage 

1005
00:44:03,760 --> 00:44:04,593
and they lost her fucking mind because I
can't a guild it because they just 

1006
00:44:07,451 --> 00:44:08,890
assumed it's whiskey.
Right,

1007
00:44:08,891 --> 00:44:09,610
right,
right.

1008
00:44:09,610 --> 00:44:12,610
I think I'd like to find a middle ground
of like,

1009
00:44:13,060 --> 00:44:15,250
of like where I can go and have a good 
time.

1010
00:44:15,260 --> 00:44:18,430
I want to quit drinking on planes.
That's number one.

1011
00:44:18,730 --> 00:44:20,200
That's my thing.
I'm focused on this month,

1012
00:44:20,440 --> 00:44:24,020
no booze on planes and then I wouldn't 
mind ski,

1013
00:44:24,060 --> 00:44:28,180
like working out hard.
Like I think I always say I work out,

1014
00:44:28,181 --> 00:44:31,530
but like legit working out is not what 
been doing.

1015
00:44:31,620 --> 00:44:32,100
Yeah.
Like

1016
00:44:32,100 --> 00:44:35,670
when you do a 90 minute hot yoga class,
you realize what suffering really is.

1017
00:44:35,790 --> 00:44:38,070
Ten minutes into our first class,
Tom,

1018
00:44:38,670 --> 00:44:40,600
tom looked over to me and he goes,
well,

1019
00:44:40,630 --> 00:44:42,460
you can't do this.
I'm like,

1020
00:44:43,380 --> 00:44:44,191
I'm looking at him.
I'm like,

1021
00:44:44,191 --> 00:44:44,940
what?
He goes,

1022
00:44:44,940 --> 00:44:49,940
10 minute gifts going 10 minutes.
Then you go 15 minutes an hour.

1023
00:44:51,241 --> 00:44:52,290
He goes,
I'm done,

1024
00:44:52,350 --> 00:44:53,970
I'm done.
I can't do 30 more minutes.

1025
00:44:54,320 --> 00:44:56,490
And,
and then when we go,

1026
00:44:56,491 --> 00:44:57,324
you know,
when you get on your back and you put 

1027
00:44:57,961 --> 00:44:58,794
your arms out and tom just reached over 
and grabs my hand and holds it tight 

1028
00:45:02,250 --> 00:45:03,510
like a lover.
And he's like,

1029
00:45:03,630 --> 00:45:07,620
get me the fuck out of here.
And it's gotten easier.

1030
00:45:07,710 --> 00:45:08,543
And like things that we couldn't do.
Now we can do and we've only been at 

1031
00:45:11,421 --> 00:45:14,030
like six classes but we're getting 
better at it.

1032
00:45:14,060 --> 00:45:15,240
No,
we're enjoying it more.

1033
00:45:15,241 --> 00:45:18,420
And like everyone knows us because we're
the two big fucking bears in there.

1034
00:45:20,580 --> 00:45:21,413
And uh,
but Tom got in trouble for drinking 

1035
00:45:24,061 --> 00:45:24,894
water one time.
Didn't drink water during the poses and 

1036
00:45:27,241 --> 00:45:28,074
you can't do that.
You have to wait until both poses are 

1037
00:45:29,881 --> 00:45:31,950
done.
Who set one?

1038
00:45:31,951 --> 00:45:34,980
Set Two.
He got so fucking pissed.

1039
00:45:34,981 --> 00:45:35,814
He went to go drink one of the like Tom,
no water and he was like and looked 

1040
00:45:38,251 --> 00:45:40,320
around to me like,
are you fucking kidding me?

1041
00:45:40,860 --> 00:45:41,693
He's,
he's a guy teaching the class for us 

1042
00:45:43,620 --> 00:45:44,990
guys are the ones that tell you to 
water.

1043
00:45:45,450 --> 00:45:47,940
The girls are like,
if you'd like to drink water,

1044
00:45:47,941 --> 00:45:49,920
please do it.
When we're done with the pose,

1045
00:45:50,380 --> 00:45:53,550
is that you like your.
Everyone's working together.

1046
00:45:53,880 --> 00:45:54,713
This is the idea that [inaudible] does 
is that you're all working together and 

1047
00:45:57,781 --> 00:46:01,350
that if you interrupt the work to drink 
water,

1048
00:46:01,351 --> 00:46:04,230
you're sending a bad message like you're
not in the community,

1049
00:46:04,730 --> 00:46:05,563
you know,
because there's something about those 

1050
00:46:06,961 --> 00:46:07,590
classes.

1051
00:46:07,590 --> 00:46:11,310
It's like I'm,
I've done yoga by myself.

1052
00:46:11,530 --> 00:46:14,700
You know,
I have an APP on my phone and it'll time

1053
00:46:14,701 --> 00:46:17,730
out all the poses and stuff like that.
I can,

1054
00:46:17,790 --> 00:46:20,010
I can do it,
but I do a lot of working out by myself.

1055
00:46:20,011 --> 00:46:21,630
I do a lot of lifting and running and 
everything.

1056
00:46:21,631 --> 00:46:23,550
I do by myself,
I know how to motivate myself,

1057
00:46:23,551 --> 00:46:26,850
but it's so much better to do it in a 
class.

1058
00:46:27,660 --> 00:46:31,140
It holds you accountable,
it holds you accountable and it's slick.

1059
00:46:31,141 --> 00:46:34,110
There's no bullshit you.
This is going to be your fucking to hold

1060
00:46:34,111 --> 00:46:36,330
this pose for 30 seconds,
period.

1061
00:46:36,510 --> 00:46:38,490
This is 30 seconds,
you know,

1062
00:46:38,491 --> 00:46:42,500
and you do it as much as you can and 
your fucking feet are shaking and to.

1063
00:46:42,570 --> 00:46:45,900
My favorite one is my favorite one is 
this one.

1064
00:46:46,240 --> 00:46:48,890
You go down here and sit here.
Yeah.

1065
00:46:49,080 --> 00:46:50,520
I love that fucking post.

1066
00:46:50,580 --> 00:46:51,413
That's my love that I just because I was
a catcher so it's like it goes right 

1067
00:46:54,211 --> 00:46:57,780
back to my strength was that one works.
I love that fucking pose.

1068
00:46:57,781 --> 00:47:00,420
I go deep when she goes down,
I go deep.

1069
00:47:00,450 --> 00:47:02,770
Not In the plain one where you come on.
Good one.

1070
00:47:03,150 --> 00:47:04,980
Tom.
Tom and I had been talking about doing a

1071
00:47:04,981 --> 00:47:07,970
calendar,
a yoga or yoga poses calendar.

1072
00:47:08,040 --> 00:47:10,180
Twelve months.
Me and Tom and different poses together.

1073
00:47:11,810 --> 00:47:14,100
You could sell the shit out of that 
thing.

1074
00:47:14,450 --> 00:47:17,370
It's like great idea Jamie.
You would take the for photography.

1075
00:47:17,860 --> 00:47:20,010
A couple couples poses down by the 
beach.

1076
00:47:21,410 --> 00:47:24,210
We're talking about Jamie,
we want to do a Vikrum hot,

1077
00:47:24,211 --> 00:47:25,510
sweaty,
uh,

1078
00:47:25,530 --> 00:47:27,720
maybe both of us in speedos.
Oh yeah.

1079
00:47:27,800 --> 00:47:28,410
And,
and,

1080
00:47:28,410 --> 00:47:29,860
and hold our favorite poses

1081
00:47:30,660 --> 00:47:31,493
poses.
I'd wear those in a heartbeat to the 

1082
00:47:34,630 --> 00:47:36,430
second we went in the first cost.
We went in.

1083
00:47:36,790 --> 00:47:37,820
Tom Goes,
uh,

1084
00:47:37,870 --> 00:47:40,810
he sees a guy in the speedo and he goes,
how are you not wearing a speedo because

1085
00:47:40,811 --> 00:47:41,860
like,
this is your whole thing.

1086
00:47:41,890 --> 00:47:42,910
And I was like,
I don't know.

1087
00:47:43,540 --> 00:47:48,310
My favorite Tommy Bond story in Yoga 
instructor starts telling a story,

1088
00:47:48,460 --> 00:47:50,290
you know,
like in between poses.

1089
00:47:50,291 --> 00:47:51,124
He's telling a story in the first 30 
minutes of class about his son and him 

1090
00:47:55,330 --> 00:47:59,830
in New York and his son walking and his 
son being out of breath and whatnot.

1091
00:48:00,190 --> 00:48:04,300
And then continues on with the poses.
Last 30 minutes of class,

1092
00:48:04,301 --> 00:48:08,680
we are fucking panting.
We're on our stomachs face to the left,

1093
00:48:08,681 --> 00:48:13,150
hands down by your side.
And I hear it in a silent class a year.

1094
00:48:13,220 --> 00:48:14,800
Tom Go,
hey man.

1095
00:48:15,730 --> 00:48:16,570
Hey,
what happened?

1096
00:48:16,571 --> 00:48:18,010
And he's just talking loud as shit.

1097
00:48:18,290 --> 00:48:19,123
Scared the fuck out of me because what 
happened with you and your son in New 

1098
00:48:22,310 --> 00:48:24,490
York?
They got goes.

1099
00:48:24,740 --> 00:48:25,690
Excuse me,
guys goes,

1100
00:48:25,760 --> 00:48:26,840
you never finished your story,
man.

1101
00:48:26,841 --> 00:48:29,640
I've been waiting for this end of the 
story and you just kept dragging.

1102
00:48:29,760 --> 00:48:33,290
Like he keeps talking and I am in 
shaking next to him going,

1103
00:48:33,560 --> 00:48:35,690
shut the fuck up were fucking yoga.

1104
00:48:37,900 --> 00:48:40,470
Does the guy finished?
And that was it.

1105
00:48:40,500 --> 00:48:41,970
And Tom Goes,
oh,

1106
00:48:48,410 --> 00:48:51,210
oh,
he is so fucking funny.

1107
00:48:51,211 --> 00:48:52,980
Did you see the video we did with the 
girl?

1108
00:48:53,860 --> 00:48:55,420
Oh,
did you see the girl?

1109
00:48:55,480 --> 00:48:57,300
The video we did with the girl,
Laura Ackerman.

1110
00:48:57,330 --> 00:48:59,220
She seemed so good.
She was so cool.

1111
00:48:59,260 --> 00:49:00,093
Shit.
The instructors that would know she was 

1112
00:49:00,910 --> 00:49:03,570
just a person in class.
The look on her face

1113
00:49:03,570 --> 00:49:06,000
face when?
When we go to the other machine,

1114
00:49:06,130 --> 00:49:08,880
you come coming the tank.
You haven't seen it.

1115
00:49:09,180 --> 00:49:10,270
I thought she called you.
No,

1116
00:49:10,340 --> 00:49:10,760
no,
no.

1117
00:49:10,760 --> 00:49:11,593
You're the machine here.
Play the video and watch the look on my 

1118
00:49:14,131 --> 00:49:16,470
face when I go.
We're doing with our friend Ari Shapiro.

1119
00:49:16,471 --> 00:49:17,910
Do you know her fear?
And she said,

1120
00:49:17,911 --> 00:49:18,541
no,
no,

1121
00:49:18,541 --> 00:49:19,020
no,
no.

1122
00:49:19,020 --> 00:49:19,831
Play the video.
Jamie.

1123
00:49:19,831 --> 00:49:23,160
This is the look on my me and Tom's face
when she says she knows already.

1124
00:49:23,280 --> 00:49:26,190
We fucking lose our shit.
Hot Yoga class number two.

1125
00:49:27,060 --> 00:49:27,541
Laura.
Laura,

1126
00:49:27,541 --> 00:49:28,374
how did we do?
We shocked you when you said we were 

1127
00:49:31,591 --> 00:49:33,150
doing no alcohol?
No weed this month.

1128
00:49:33,151 --> 00:49:37,550
Huh?
You got to pray for Joe?

1129
00:49:37,650 --> 00:49:38,201
Yeah.
Oh,

1130
00:49:38,201 --> 00:49:39,940
let's bow our heads and pray for God.
You Ready?

1131
00:49:40,360 --> 00:49:41,051
One,
two,

1132
00:49:41,051 --> 00:49:44,530
three.
Now I'm a stage Joe.

1133
00:49:44,710 --> 00:49:47,100
Our thoughts and prayers are with you 
this week in Vegas.

1134
00:49:47,160 --> 00:49:49,840
We know you'll be using the cannabis.
Yeah.

1135
00:49:50,120 --> 00:49:54,040
Joe's also donating 100 percent show to 
the Las Vegas.

1136
00:49:54,360 --> 00:49:57,640
You guys shout out to Joe Rogan on that.
Good job.

1137
00:49:57,670 --> 00:49:58,960
Good job,
Joe and Ari.

1138
00:49:59,720 --> 00:50:04,240
Ari Shapiro says you do,
but you know,

1139
00:50:04,270 --> 00:50:05,103
very severe.

1140
00:50:15,010 --> 00:50:18,510
Alright,
we'll see you next.

1141
00:50:19,820 --> 00:50:21,810
Hilarious.
And he said that to the instructor.

1142
00:50:22,580 --> 00:50:24,390
Oh,
he is,

1143
00:50:24,480 --> 00:50:26,160
dude.
He is so fucking.

1144
00:50:26,270 --> 00:50:28,050
There's a.
If you like to stand

1145
00:50:28,050 --> 00:50:28,883
up,
you would love being his friend because 

1146
00:50:29,721 --> 00:50:31,380
he's so dry.
Yeah.

1147
00:50:32,080 --> 00:50:37,080
As he does in that class or he's not 
trying to be funny as being tossed to do

1148
00:50:37,161 --> 00:50:40,070
that in class too.
Just talking in the middle of class.

1149
00:50:40,160 --> 00:50:40,993
Oh God,
they do tell some terrible stories 

1150
00:50:42,651 --> 00:50:44,510
though,
because they have you held hostage.

1151
00:50:44,530 --> 00:50:46,190
Yeah,
because you're in the middle of Yoga,

1152
00:50:46,280 --> 00:50:47,660
you know?
Oh,

1153
00:50:48,410 --> 00:50:50,420
I said one time the lady goes,
uh,

1154
00:50:50,780 --> 00:50:53,540
Bert,
it's the one where you pull your foot up

1155
00:50:53,541 --> 00:50:54,680
and you're supposed to kick your foot 
out.

1156
00:50:55,100 --> 00:50:56,540
She goes,
burt grabbed the bottom of your foot.

1157
00:50:56,541 --> 00:50:57,141
I go,
I can't.

1158
00:50:57,141 --> 00:50:59,420
I'm fat.
And then she goes,

1159
00:50:59,421 --> 00:51:04,421
there's people fatter than you in this 
class going because we know that fucker.

1160
00:51:05,940 --> 00:51:06,441
He,
by the way,

1161
00:51:06,441 --> 00:51:08,060
I have to say this,
I will always shit on Tom's.

1162
00:51:08,061 --> 00:51:10,040
Wait,
he's actually looking really good,

1163
00:51:10,041 --> 00:51:11,570
I think is hot yoga is really clicking 
with them.

1164
00:51:11,630 --> 00:51:12,463
Oh yeah.
You can get much deeper into poses and 

1165
00:51:14,560 --> 00:51:15,393
can.
I have a hard time getting into deep 

1166
00:51:16,431 --> 00:51:19,550
poses,
but he really has changed his life.

1167
00:51:19,700 --> 00:51:21,830
We weighed the exact same joe.
Yeah,

1168
00:51:21,831 --> 00:51:24,380
but he's probably more muscular than,
you know,

1169
00:51:26,080 --> 00:51:26,913
a lot more skin.
Something about them that seems more 

1170
00:51:28,611 --> 00:51:30,800
fit.
Being real.

1171
00:51:31,270 --> 00:51:33,860
You're down to 19 or something crazy.
What were you at?

1172
00:51:33,861 --> 00:51:38,300
The weight loss challenge was to 
probably to 19 to 22.

1173
00:51:38,360 --> 00:51:39,193
Isn't that crazy?
You're lighter now and you're not 

1174
00:51:40,581 --> 00:51:41,414
dehydrating yourself.
I took total measurements in my body 

1175
00:51:43,401 --> 00:51:45,950
because I'm curious to see at the end of
the month everyone said,

1176
00:51:45,980 --> 00:51:48,080
I looked like I'm deflated.
You look thin,

1177
00:51:48,340 --> 00:51:52,050
my face looks healthier and so I took 
measures on my stomach,

1178
00:51:52,110 --> 00:51:53,300
my arms,
my legs,

1179
00:51:53,800 --> 00:51:56,210
and just to see like,
like what the shift was.

1180
00:51:56,211 --> 00:51:59,300
I was 2:24.
The day West I stopped drinking.

1181
00:51:59,480 --> 00:52:01,580
What your face looks different like your
eyes,

1182
00:52:01,581 --> 00:52:03,980
like you used to have the.
I've been drinking bags,

1183
00:52:04,230 --> 00:52:08,090
you know that a lot of people get six 
slash one slash 2:24

1184
00:52:08,091 --> 00:52:09,020
chest,
47.

1185
00:52:09,021 --> 00:52:11,240
And Are you talking about your Dick?
Yeah.

1186
00:52:14,150 --> 00:52:14,983
So you're doing that at the beginning 
and then when you get to the end you're 

1187
00:52:17,091 --> 00:52:19,660
going to check yourself again.
Now what are you eating?

1188
00:52:19,700 --> 00:52:21,620
You eating healthy or eating?
Just whatever you want.

1189
00:52:22,730 --> 00:52:23,563
Well,
I'm eating healthy for like two thirds 

1190
00:52:26,331 --> 00:52:27,260
of the day.
Oh,

1191
00:52:27,261 --> 00:52:27,980
okay.
Like,

1192
00:52:27,980 --> 00:52:29,510
like I'm eating really healthy and I'm 
doing this.

1193
00:52:29,511 --> 00:52:33,260
I saw this on a podcast you did with 
some girl about not intermittent fasting

1194
00:52:33,261 --> 00:52:35,120
and fasting for 13,
12 hours.

1195
00:52:35,180 --> 00:52:36,013
Yeah.
That's called intermittent fasting and 

1196
00:52:36,831 --> 00:52:38,290
doing that I'm doing intermittent 
fasting,

1197
00:52:38,300 --> 00:52:41,180
but by the way,
14 is what I think they recommend.

1198
00:52:41,890 --> 00:52:44,240
Really.
Your last meal is at 5:00

1199
00:52:44,240 --> 00:52:47,690
PM or just eat at 10:00
PM and then don't eat until noon.

1200
00:52:49,070 --> 00:52:51,860
I have my last meal.
Is that mid at 8:00

1201
00:52:51,860 --> 00:52:54,170
PM last night I.
Last thing I put my mouth was at apm.

1202
00:52:54,470 --> 00:52:55,303
I do seven and nine.
I have dinner at seven and then I don't 

1203
00:52:57,501 --> 00:52:58,334
eat until nine in the morning and when I
eat in the morning I drink butter 

1204
00:53:00,681 --> 00:53:01,370
coffee.

1205
00:53:01,370 --> 00:53:02,203
Like before I work out I just have 
coffee with grass fed butter and mct 

1206
00:53:05,151 --> 00:53:06,550
oil.
That's what I've been doing that.

1207
00:53:06,580 --> 00:53:07,413
And that's your first.
Once you have that structure saying 

1208
00:53:09,990 --> 00:53:10,823
yeah.
Yeah.

1209
00:53:10,850 --> 00:53:14,030
But I,
I go 14 hours every day without eating.

1210
00:53:14,510 --> 00:53:16,670
I've been eating a lot of,
I shouldn't say every day,

1211
00:53:16,910 --> 00:53:17,990
five,
six days a week.

1212
00:53:18,200 --> 00:53:19,033
I go,
I try to do 12 hours every day and then 

1213
00:53:21,411 --> 00:53:22,244
the first thing I do is I drink a two 
huge things of water and then that shit 

1214
00:53:25,351 --> 00:53:27,600
immediately,
as soon as I have those.

1215
00:53:28,550 --> 00:53:29,910
Yeah.
And uh,

1216
00:53:30,550 --> 00:53:31,383
and then,
and then,

1217
00:53:31,410 --> 00:53:33,330
and then I'll eat.
I try to eat healthy in the morning.

1218
00:53:33,331 --> 00:53:36,690
I'll eat healthy in the afternoon after 
hot yoga.

1219
00:53:36,691 --> 00:53:38,520
Man,
I fucking,

1220
00:53:38,660 --> 00:53:41,430
I,
I cannot say no to a candy bar.

1221
00:53:41,610 --> 00:53:44,220
Like I don't know if it's my,
if my blood sugar's off probably.

1222
00:53:44,221 --> 00:53:45,060
Yeah.
But I'm like,

1223
00:53:45,180 --> 00:53:47,400
I come home and I'm like,
I need fucking something sweet.

1224
00:53:48,290 --> 00:53:50,010
I'll eat a really healthy dinner.
Yeah,

1225
00:53:50,011 --> 00:53:51,330
that's probably exactly what it is.
You know,

1226
00:53:51,331 --> 00:53:54,240
your body is craving glucose.
It must be.

1227
00:53:54,241 --> 00:53:55,370
I had a score.
Bars.

1228
00:53:55,380 --> 00:53:58,740
I eat it so quick.
Yesterday have so many calories.

1229
00:53:58,860 --> 00:54:01,260
I don't know how many calories you burn 
and 15,

1230
00:54:01,680 --> 00:54:03,330
they say that's it.
Seven or 15.

1231
00:54:03,540 --> 00:54:05,550
That sounds about right.
Well it depends on the effort.

1232
00:54:06,070 --> 00:54:08,430
You know,
I'm like if you do it 100 percent,

1233
00:54:08,820 --> 00:54:13,820
like I can coast through a class or I 
can do everything at 100 percent.

1234
00:54:14,941 --> 00:54:15,774
And I've done both.
And the difference in the way I feel at 

1235
00:54:18,271 --> 00:54:22,980
the end is significantly different.
I did one class that was a mix up.

1236
00:54:23,010 --> 00:54:25,020
It wasn't bikram,
it was hot yoga,

1237
00:54:26,010 --> 00:54:28,310
and it was a,
it was a little like,

1238
00:54:28,680 --> 00:54:31,620
a little different in that we did all 26
poses,

1239
00:54:32,340 --> 00:54:34,500
but we also did flow in between them.

1240
00:54:34,870 --> 00:54:36,420
Yeah,
that was really tough.

1241
00:54:36,510 --> 00:54:37,890
I thought that's the kind of you went 
to.

1242
00:54:37,891 --> 00:54:38,724
I was like,
I'm never going to Joe's one because it 

1243
00:54:39,811 --> 00:54:43,680
was like downward dog,
Cobra Warrior one,

1244
00:54:43,800 --> 00:54:46,290
Warrior one,
Warrior two on Wednesdays.

1245
00:54:46,530 --> 00:54:47,440
Do you really?
Yeah,

1246
00:54:47,441 --> 00:54:49,550
that's my Wednesday.
That's a hard fucking class.

1247
00:54:49,620 --> 00:54:50,700
Our class.
Yeah.

1248
00:54:50,850 --> 00:54:53,580
And then they add humidity to it.
Oh really?

1249
00:54:54,560 --> 00:54:55,580
I don't know.
They said just,

1250
00:54:55,590 --> 00:54:56,423
I said I walked in those very 
competencies with my wife's best friend 

1251
00:54:58,770 --> 00:54:59,501
and I was like,
uh,

1252
00:54:59,501 --> 00:55:00,550
they're like,
have you ever done hot yoga?

1253
00:55:00,551 --> 00:55:00,901
And I said,
yeah,

1254
00:55:00,901 --> 00:55:02,460
I do back home.
And they're like,

1255
00:55:02,790 --> 00:55:04,080
we're a little different.
I was like,

1256
00:55:04,081 --> 00:55:05,110
no,
I get it.

1257
00:55:05,130 --> 00:55:05,701
It's,
it'll be.

1258
00:55:05,701 --> 00:55:07,140
But it's the same poses,
right?

1259
00:55:07,370 --> 00:55:07,801
It's like,
no,

1260
00:55:07,801 --> 00:55:09,540
there's some flow in between and we add 
humidity.

1261
00:55:09,660 --> 00:55:10,493
So stand by the door,
like make sure you're masked by the 

1262
00:55:12,181 --> 00:55:12,510
door.

1263
00:55:12,510 --> 00:55:14,750
So they must have like a humidifier in 
the room or something.

1264
00:55:14,751 --> 00:55:15,584
And I guess that's why I was by the door
and it was so much hotter in there that 

1265
00:55:20,461 --> 00:55:23,850
it was burning my eyes and mouth and 
they would open the door.

1266
00:55:23,851 --> 00:55:24,870
And then when they opened the door I was
like,

1267
00:55:24,871 --> 00:55:25,704
thank God.
Well we got a sauna that we're putting 

1268
00:55:28,591 --> 00:55:30,390
in the new studio.
It's actually in already.

1269
00:55:30,870 --> 00:55:32,810
So uh,
can't wait to see this new siblings.

1270
00:55:33,030 --> 00:55:34,260
Oh Dude.
It's the play house.

1271
00:55:34,290 --> 00:55:35,730
We're going to have the best play house 
ever.

1272
00:55:35,820 --> 00:55:36,900
Oh,
so exciting.

1273
00:55:37,260 --> 00:55:40,320
It's happening.
We were setting set to move on Monday.

1274
00:55:40,860 --> 00:55:42,450
You're going to move on Monday.
That Monday.

1275
00:55:42,840 --> 00:55:45,600
Shit,
we got to do a podcast.

1276
00:55:45,601 --> 00:55:46,710
Maybe you telling me.
And already again,

1277
00:55:46,711 --> 00:55:49,730
one more time when we're back partying,
going to get already high first.

1278
00:55:49,880 --> 00:55:52,680
You have them down,
bring them back to baseline.

1279
00:55:52,770 --> 00:55:54,540
I tie them back to happy hour.
I will tell you,

1280
00:55:54,541 --> 00:55:56,970
I miss it.
I've never had a real,

1281
00:55:57,570 --> 00:55:59,850
uh,
one of marijuana like I'll smoke it,

1282
00:55:59,851 --> 00:56:02,340
but I've never been a guy that like gets
high on my own.

1283
00:56:02,760 --> 00:56:05,190
Ms Dot Marijuana.
Marijuana is a great thing,

1284
00:56:05,191 --> 00:56:06,024
but it's also a great thing to just be 
alive and be yourself and take a month 

1285
00:56:09,541 --> 00:56:10,560
off of everything.
I,

1286
00:56:10,561 --> 00:56:12,720
I'm enjoying this.
I'm enjoying this 12 months.

1287
00:56:12,721 --> 00:56:14,920
I have zero cravings.
You know,

1288
00:56:15,390 --> 00:56:16,223
one thing that I miss,
I wish there was nonalcoholic wine that 

1289
00:56:19,621 --> 00:56:22,170
tasted the same because I really do 
enjoy wine.

1290
00:56:22,230 --> 00:56:24,730
I like wine with a nice meal.
Like,

1291
00:56:24,820 --> 00:56:25,653
you know,
I've worked hard and when I'm done 

1292
00:56:27,191 --> 00:56:32,170
working I like to go to a restaurant and
have a nice meal or sit at home,

1293
00:56:32,171 --> 00:56:33,910
maybe cooked for myself.
Have An.

1294
00:56:34,070 --> 00:56:39,070
Was that you detoxing?
They call it the crocodile shakes.

1295
00:56:39,610 --> 00:56:44,590
I'm having a like a steak and some wind 
does have one of the great pleasures.

1296
00:56:45,130 --> 00:56:45,963
That's the only thing I'm missing.
I've only wanted booze one day this 

1297
00:56:48,790 --> 00:56:51,490
whole run and that was at the rams game.

1298
00:56:53,660 --> 00:56:56,560
Cold beer on a hot day at nice cold 
beer.

1299
00:56:56,630 --> 00:56:57,463
Oh,
it was a beautiful day and I was with 

1300
00:56:59,801 --> 00:57:01,900
two buddies and and their kid and I was 
like.

1301
00:57:02,750 --> 00:57:03,371
And they were like,
hey,

1302
00:57:03,371 --> 00:57:04,204
we're going to go to the,
the corona little bar area to get a 

1303
00:57:06,641 --> 00:57:07,930
drink.
I was like,

1304
00:57:07,931 --> 00:57:09,520
okay,
and I hung out and I was like,

1305
00:57:09,550 --> 00:57:10,383
Oh,
I definitely want a cold beer and a hot 

1306
00:57:12,131 --> 00:57:15,010
dog and some peanuts and then just,
Oh,

1307
00:57:15,240 --> 00:57:17,500
and then that trade off you do with your
friends.

1308
00:57:17,501 --> 00:57:18,460
Hey,
you're going to go out and get beers.

1309
00:57:18,461 --> 00:57:20,070
Grabbed me,
grabbed me one and then they come back.

1310
00:57:20,090 --> 00:57:21,250
You gotta Oh.
And,

1311
00:57:21,790 --> 00:57:23,560
but in the honesty,
I gotta be honest with you.

1312
00:57:23,561 --> 00:57:25,450
I,
I really enjoyed,

1313
00:57:25,800 --> 00:57:27,640
uh,
being the designated driver.

1314
00:57:27,641 --> 00:57:29,600
I've never done that.
So like I was like,

1315
00:57:30,030 --> 00:57:31,870
I'll drive everybody.
I'm responsible.

1316
00:57:33,050 --> 00:57:36,640
It was really cool to show up and see my
kids and be like that stone sober,

1317
00:57:36,770 --> 00:57:37,540
you know what I like?

1318
00:57:37,540 --> 00:57:41,890
I like a cold beer when you're fishing.
Oh,

1319
00:57:41,920 --> 00:57:46,050
come on like a Medallia or something,
you know,

1320
00:57:46,140 --> 00:57:47,590
like a Modelo,
amber.

1321
00:57:47,740 --> 00:57:48,573
Nice fucking freezing cold.
We have reached into the cooler and the 

1322
00:57:51,630 --> 00:57:55,300
ice is fallen off the bottle and you 
cracked that fucker and,

1323
00:58:00,400 --> 00:58:02,830
or Heineken.
Good cold.

1324
00:58:02,831 --> 00:58:06,670
Heineken sounds old Sam Adams.
Sounds amazing right now.

1325
00:58:08,320 --> 00:58:10,120
Cold Sam Adams.
Lager.

1326
00:58:11,780 --> 00:58:15,550
Stella tastes so good.
I want to be on the on,

1327
00:58:15,570 --> 00:58:20,260
on the water,
like fishing with a cold Sam Adams.

1328
00:58:20,350 --> 00:58:20,891
Oh,
what would it be?

1329
00:58:20,891 --> 00:58:22,030
The drink.
What would be the drink of.

1330
00:58:22,031 --> 00:58:22,864
You're sitting on the beach on a beach 
bar in like St Martin's in the son's 

1331
00:58:27,041 --> 00:58:29,530
getting ready to set in some of those.
Can I get you a drink?

1332
00:58:29,531 --> 00:58:31,120
What would be your drink right then?
Margarita.

1333
00:58:32,380 --> 00:58:33,213
Margarita,
Bro.

1334
00:58:33,670 --> 00:58:35,380
It's cold.
It's got the ice.

1335
00:58:35,381 --> 00:58:37,840
It's got the salt around the rim and I'm
going to float around.

1336
00:58:37,840 --> 00:58:38,673
And Tyla tequilas always meaning your 
party and you drink it to kill your 

1337
00:58:41,951 --> 00:58:42,731
partying.
Oh,

1338
00:58:42,731 --> 00:58:45,100
I can't wait.
I can't wait till I get started again.

1339
00:58:46,090 --> 00:58:50,620
I was going to be with Red Halloween 
night at 11:00

1340
00:58:50,680 --> 00:58:54,190
or he's like you started at eastern 
standard time that 11:00.

1341
00:58:54,191 --> 00:58:55,780
New Orleans.
We get to have our first drink,

1342
00:58:55,990 --> 00:58:58,810
so it's.
I cannot fucking wait.

1343
00:58:58,900 --> 00:59:01,630
You guys are going to be in Halloween.
You're going to be in New Orleans.

1344
00:59:01,631 --> 00:59:03,130
Halloween.
We're going to French quarter.

1345
00:59:03,190 --> 00:59:04,023
Your Kid's gonna tweak on that.
That you're not going to be with your 

1346
00:59:05,531 --> 00:59:06,364
kids on Halloween a.
They were a little upset because they 

1347
00:59:11,591 --> 00:59:15,160
weren't worth of dominic's or hey,
you want to make money or what?

1348
00:59:15,640 --> 00:59:17,570
You guys have a job.
No.

1349
00:59:17,610 --> 00:59:19,570
Well Daddy has to work.
Get over it.

1350
00:59:19,571 --> 00:59:21,140
It's just a day fucks.
Yeah.

1351
00:59:21,141 --> 00:59:22,010
They were a little upset about

1352
00:59:22,010 --> 00:59:22,843
Halloween,
but have we find in New Orleans we go 

1353
00:59:24,501 --> 00:59:25,520
out that night.
I was,

1354
00:59:25,550 --> 00:59:26,700
I was,
I ran.

1355
00:59:26,701 --> 00:59:27,620
I've been talking about it,
but I was like,

1356
00:59:27,650 --> 00:59:28,483
we'll go to a nice dinner.
We'll go out to the French quarter a 

1357
00:59:30,351 --> 00:59:32,600
little later.
See everyone hang out,

1358
00:59:32,601 --> 00:59:35,480
be sober and then come 11:00
PM

1359
00:59:36,270 --> 00:59:38,920
Coco.
Now when are you going to,

1360
00:59:38,921 --> 00:59:39,754
uh,
you're going to do Halloween with your 

1361
00:59:40,811 --> 00:59:42,730
kids at all or you just can't write it 
off?

1362
00:59:42,860 --> 00:59:44,200
Okay.
How long are you gone for?

1363
00:59:44,930 --> 00:59:45,763
Come back to.
I think ren are going to a saints game 

1364
00:59:49,781 --> 00:59:51,970
on the sixth and then me,
sal,

1365
00:59:52,210 --> 00:59:54,340
Vulcano and neighbor.
Got To.

1366
00:59:54,341 --> 00:59:55,360
You're doing the joy theater?
Yeah.

1367
00:59:55,390 --> 00:59:56,850
The evening of the sixth.
Oh,

1368
00:59:56,851 --> 00:59:57,970
okay.
So then you're at home.

1369
00:59:57,971 --> 01:00:00,070
I'm on the seventh.
Why don't you dress up like a clown when

1370
01:00:00,071 --> 01:00:01,660
you get home?
Fuck that.

1371
01:00:03,250 --> 01:00:06,460
My daughter Ella loves dressing as a 
clown and it freaks me the fuck out.

1372
01:00:07,630 --> 01:00:08,463
She buys different wigs on Amazon and 
that has upset and just throws them on 

1373
01:00:11,201 --> 01:00:13,090
and puts makeup on her face.
Are you going to wake up?

1374
01:00:13,140 --> 01:00:14,380
She's going to be at the foot of the 
bed.

1375
01:00:16,750 --> 01:00:17,583
That would freak me out.
The worst is someone dresses a fucking 

1376
01:00:19,451 --> 01:00:21,040
clown in my room.
Oh Dude,

1377
01:00:21,490 --> 01:00:23,920
I don't like that shit.
What is it about clowns and freak people

1378
01:00:23,921 --> 01:00:24,754
out?
You don't know who is really under that 

1379
01:00:26,021 --> 01:00:27,820
makeup.
There's like a weird thing,

1380
01:00:27,821 --> 01:00:28,654
right?
And also the kind of choices that you 

1381
01:00:30,581 --> 01:00:32,980
have to make in your life where you wind
up being a grown person,

1382
01:00:32,981 --> 01:00:35,110
being a clown.
Like what did you fuck up?

1383
01:00:35,111 --> 01:00:37,240
Like what?
What demons are you hiding?

1384
01:00:37,270 --> 01:00:40,180
What mistakes have you made?
John Wayne gacy really fucked up being a

1385
01:00:40,181 --> 01:00:41,014
clown.
He did because he was a guy that was 

1386
01:00:43,001 --> 01:00:43,811
like the one.
We were like,

1387
01:00:43,811 --> 01:00:44,644
oh,
there's something sinister underneath 

1388
01:00:45,191 --> 01:00:46,750
there.
Maybe that's where it started.

1389
01:00:47,720 --> 01:00:50,390
Maybe that's where it all started with 
people it had to write.

1390
01:00:50,480 --> 01:00:53,450
Didn't have fucker killed like 30 
something kids and bring them all in his

1391
01:00:53,460 --> 01:00:54,910
backyard.
Did you ever see what the.

1392
01:00:54,920 --> 01:00:56,930
They did a movie on him.
Do you ever see what he would do?

1393
01:00:57,320 --> 01:00:58,940
He would.
Oh God.

1394
01:00:59,150 --> 01:01:00,620
What?
What did he call himself?

1395
01:01:02,020 --> 01:01:05,800
He had a name for his clown.
Wasn't pennywise.

1396
01:01:05,801 --> 01:01:07,990
Pennywise is from it.
I was about to say pennywise.

1397
01:01:11,570 --> 01:01:12,403
He would take,
he would take trick handcuffs and he'd 

1398
01:01:15,200 --> 01:01:17,120
go to bring a guy,
a kid,

1399
01:01:17,121 --> 01:01:18,230
do his house and say,
here,

1400
01:01:18,590 --> 01:01:21,410
put these on me.
And then he put them on and then he'd go

1401
01:01:21,411 --> 01:01:22,970
behind his back and he doesn't do it.
And you go,

1402
01:01:22,971 --> 01:01:24,140
Huh?
I got out and the kid be like,

1403
01:01:24,141 --> 01:01:24,881
wait,
how did you do that?

1404
01:01:24,881 --> 01:01:25,551
And be like,
here,

1405
01:01:25,551 --> 01:01:26,384
I'll show you.
Turn around and then you get real 

1406
01:01:27,441 --> 01:01:30,320
handcuffs in handcuffs the kid and then 
fucking killed him.

1407
01:01:31,910 --> 01:01:35,360
So he wanted the element of fear and 
terror.

1408
01:01:35,510 --> 01:01:37,870
Not just killing the kid.
He wanted the freak the kid out.

1409
01:01:37,880 --> 01:01:40,210
You wanted to trick them.
Mother fuckers

1410
01:01:40,850 --> 01:01:42,470
the head of that shit.
I'm all,

1411
01:01:42,471 --> 01:01:43,304
I am so caught.
I got offered a threesome my last night 

1412
01:01:46,761 --> 01:01:47,930
of drinking in DC

1413
01:01:50,060 --> 01:01:53,830
across Texas to do with being a baby.
You hear me out,

1414
01:01:53,840 --> 01:01:56,120
hear me out.
These two girls were like,

1415
01:01:56,210 --> 01:01:57,000
let's go to strip.

1416
01:01:57,000 --> 01:01:57,833
But my cool,
they're dating and we get there and not 

1417
01:02:01,680 --> 01:02:02,513
my,
my spidey sense just shows up and 

1418
01:02:03,991 --> 01:02:05,250
they're like,
you're in an open relationship.

1419
01:02:05,251 --> 01:02:06,084
Right?
And I was like,

1420
01:02:06,480 --> 01:02:06,991
I was like,
no,

1421
01:02:06,991 --> 01:02:08,640
not at all.
And they're like,

1422
01:02:08,730 --> 01:02:10,770
oh,
we'll get you a drink.

1423
01:02:10,800 --> 01:02:11,880
And Martin Pardon me is like,
oh,

1424
01:02:11,881 --> 01:02:12,714
they're fucking roofing me.
Like they're gonna rob me like they 

1425
01:02:14,881 --> 01:02:16,170
don't want to fuck me.
Why?

1426
01:02:16,230 --> 01:02:17,063
Who wants to fuck me?
They're going to me get me a hotel room 

1427
01:02:20,310 --> 01:02:23,340
and then fucking take my watch off,
take my ring,

1428
01:02:23,460 --> 01:02:24,570
take,
go through my wallet,

1429
01:02:24,571 --> 01:02:27,100
take my cash out.
They didn't obviously didn't.

1430
01:02:27,110 --> 01:02:27,943
Um,
I'm a little oversensitive about shit 

1431
01:02:28,831 --> 01:02:29,664
like that,
but I,

1432
01:02:29,680 --> 01:02:30,513
they got me a drink.
I've talked to back up to the bar and 

1433
01:02:31,520 --> 01:02:31,860
go,
hey,

1434
01:02:31,860 --> 01:02:33,510
make me a new drink.
And they were like,

1435
01:02:33,511 --> 01:02:34,090
what?
I go out,

1436
01:02:34,090 --> 01:02:36,030
I didn't see this one coming to me or 
make me a new drink.

1437
01:02:36,180 --> 01:02:37,500
I'll pay for both.
I don't give you shit.

1438
01:02:37,740 --> 01:02:39,480
Made me a new drink and then I said the 
lady,

1439
01:02:39,790 --> 01:02:40,321
I was like,
Hey,

1440
01:02:40,321 --> 01:02:41,910
don't let anyone bring me a drink,
but you just,

1441
01:02:41,911 --> 01:02:43,470
you brings me a drink.
She was like,

1442
01:02:43,471 --> 01:02:45,150
okay dude,
you're a paranoid.

1443
01:02:45,240 --> 01:02:47,730
I'm very paranoid about that shit.
Have you,

1444
01:02:47,760 --> 01:02:50,350
have you ever been referred a lot?

1445
01:02:54,540 --> 01:02:55,373
A lot.
How many times you've been roofing for 

1446
01:02:57,420 --> 01:02:58,253
times when?
Just a party and I was the party animal 

1447
01:03:02,521 --> 01:03:03,660
in college.
People.

1448
01:03:03,690 --> 01:03:06,570
People would just drop it in your drink 
for the first time it happened to me.

1449
01:03:06,571 --> 01:03:07,404
It was a bar.
I think it used to be called the first 

1450
01:03:08,880 --> 01:03:09,750
eye.
They tore down the first,

1451
01:03:09,751 --> 01:03:11,880
but it was a place right next door to 
the first over,

1452
01:03:11,920 --> 01:03:12,753
uh,
on that side of campus and happened to 

1453
01:03:14,071 --> 01:03:16,170
me and my beer was fixing up and I was 
like,

1454
01:03:16,171 --> 01:03:17,460
that's odd.
I killed it.

1455
01:03:17,490 --> 01:03:18,323
Next thing you know,
I ended up in my roommate's dog bed the 

1456
01:03:21,420 --> 01:03:22,620
next day and I'm like,
what happened?

1457
01:03:22,650 --> 01:03:23,221
And they're like,
yeah,

1458
01:03:23,221 --> 01:03:24,054
you got fucking,
you got slipped something because you 

1459
01:03:25,561 --> 01:03:28,320
were out of it.
You were talking to the dog and that was

1460
01:03:28,321 --> 01:03:32,850
the first time and then it just is how 
it got slipped acid one time by a guy at

1461
01:03:32,851 --> 01:03:33,684
a party.

1462
01:03:33,810 --> 01:03:34,890
He's like,
anything you could party.

1463
01:03:34,950 --> 01:03:35,700
And I was like,
yeah,

1464
01:03:35,700 --> 01:03:36,570
definitely.
And he's like,

1465
01:03:36,630 --> 01:03:38,640
alright.
And then next thing you know he's like,

1466
01:03:38,641 --> 01:03:39,960
hey man,
enjoy the trip.

1467
01:03:39,961 --> 01:03:41,340
And I was like,
oh,

1468
01:03:41,370 --> 01:03:44,220
why would you do that?
So how did he give it to you?

1469
01:03:44,460 --> 01:03:48,190
Put it my drink and then kept drinking 
and uh,

1470
01:03:48,191 --> 01:03:49,024
I ended up in a hotel room in the mirror
and I'm looking at my eye and in my I 

1471
01:03:53,461 --> 01:03:54,294
can see my reflection of me and my eye 
and my buddy Mike Osborne and I 

1472
01:03:57,601 --> 01:03:58,630
shouldn't say his name.
Well I'm sorry,

1473
01:03:58,670 --> 01:04:01,210
said he had drank some of my same drink 
group,

1474
01:04:01,230 --> 01:04:06,180
sharing the becomes a big 32 ounce cup 
and I'm staring at my eye and my eye and

1475
01:04:06,181 --> 01:04:07,380
I'm like I don't,
I don't feel right.

1476
01:04:07,381 --> 01:04:08,214
I really don't feel right.
And I look at Osborne and he's Mike and 

1477
01:04:10,261 --> 01:04:11,670
he's sitting in the bathtub and he's 
like,

1478
01:04:11,671 --> 01:04:12,504
these aren't my feet.

1479
01:04:12,790 --> 01:04:14,490
And I was like,
I was like,

1480
01:04:15,020 --> 01:04:16,390
I was like,
I think we got slipped something man.

1481
01:04:16,391 --> 01:04:17,224
And he's like,
he's like,

1482
01:04:17,340 --> 01:04:19,410
you fucked with that one guy,
there's this Lambda Chi.

1483
01:04:19,470 --> 01:04:19,841
I said,
yeah.

1484
01:04:19,841 --> 01:04:20,251
And he goes,
yeah,

1485
01:04:20,251 --> 01:04:22,650
he was putting acid and your drink.
He put us in your drink,

1486
01:04:22,780 --> 01:04:24,270
did I drink off your fucking drink?
And I was like,

1487
01:04:24,280 --> 01:04:25,860
ah,
but it's happened.

1488
01:04:26,040 --> 01:04:29,130
I haven't one time in Phoenix.
It was about to happen.

1489
01:04:29,160 --> 01:04:29,993
I thought it was going to happen.
This kid was really adamant about me 

1490
01:04:31,981 --> 01:04:34,440
doing a shot with him and I said to him,
I was like,

1491
01:04:34,441 --> 01:04:36,660
Yo man,
you're not Ruffian me army are you?

1492
01:04:37,050 --> 01:04:38,160
Kid looked at me,
dead serious.

1493
01:04:38,161 --> 01:04:38,910
He goes,
hey man,

1494
01:04:38,910 --> 01:04:41,010
no offense.
What am I doing with his body?

1495
01:04:42,090 --> 01:04:42,451
I go,
what?

1496
01:04:42,451 --> 01:04:43,590
And he goes,
how am I getting you out of here?

1497
01:04:43,591 --> 01:04:46,500
You see a wheelbarrow like,
oh yeah,

1498
01:04:46,501 --> 01:04:47,334
good call.

1499
01:04:47,670 --> 01:04:51,450
Well he didn't have to carry you out to 
and roof you and leave you there.

1500
01:04:51,600 --> 01:04:55,620
But I think that left in the dog bed,
that's the part of the part of it,

1501
01:04:56,070 --> 01:04:59,400
of it terrifies me of like,
you know,

1502
01:04:59,670 --> 01:05:01,050
I don't get,
I don't smoke joints,

1503
01:05:01,051 --> 01:05:02,240
people give me,
I don't,

1504
01:05:02,470 --> 01:05:04,650
I don't really do coke,
but people get me coke a lot.

1505
01:05:05,070 --> 01:05:06,900
Like I don't do any weapons.
Drugs that they'd given them.

1506
01:05:06,901 --> 01:05:07,410
I'm like,
I'm,

1507
01:05:07,410 --> 01:05:08,910
I appreciate the offer,
but I'm going to pay.

1508
01:05:08,911 --> 01:05:11,610
I don't smoke weed when people anymore.
I um,

1509
01:05:11,611 --> 01:05:14,490
had a guy in Cleveland that,
uh,

1510
01:05:15,000 --> 01:05:16,200
wanted to,
uh,

1511
01:05:16,340 --> 01:05:17,980
he,
he looked like a cop,

1512
01:05:18,040 --> 01:05:21,010
like completely like their cop.
And he was asking me where to get DMT.

1513
01:05:21,360 --> 01:05:22,193
And I was like,
what?

1514
01:05:22,750 --> 01:05:23,583
And was like a,
a fit looking guy with a crew cut who 

1515
01:05:25,661 --> 01:05:27,520
was real sketchy.
I'm like,

1516
01:05:27,521 --> 01:05:28,780
what?
And he goes,

1517
01:05:28,781 --> 01:05:29,330
uh,
yeah man,

1518
01:05:29,330 --> 01:05:30,880
we're going to get some DMT.
I go,

1519
01:05:30,881 --> 01:05:32,590
what are you talking about?
And I'm like,

1520
01:05:32,591 --> 01:05:33,251
looking at him.
It was like,

1521
01:05:33,251 --> 01:05:34,180
come on man,
you know,

1522
01:05:34,270 --> 01:05:35,230
I'm not going.
I don't know.

1523
01:05:35,770 --> 01:05:37,810
Why don't you tell me what you know.
I go,

1524
01:05:37,811 --> 01:05:38,740
what are you talking about,
man?

1525
01:05:38,741 --> 01:05:39,574
What are you a cop?
I think he looked at me and next thing 

1526
01:05:41,381 --> 01:05:44,500
you know he's gone.
It was real sketchy and I was like,

1527
01:05:44,501 --> 01:05:46,960
these,
I can't be getting high with people.

1528
01:05:46,961 --> 01:05:48,000
I don't know.
You know,

1529
01:05:48,010 --> 01:05:50,770
you don't know people you never know.
You like you're running into someone and

1530
01:05:50,771 --> 01:05:53,350
they put anything in your joint.
Like who knows,

1531
01:05:53,351 --> 01:05:56,140
could be angel dust.
And I know a guy that happened to,

1532
01:05:56,170 --> 01:05:57,040
he got slipped.
Angel.

1533
01:05:57,041 --> 01:05:59,290
Dustin is weed.
Fuck that.

1534
01:05:59,410 --> 01:06:01,480
Yeah.
I had a comic.

1535
01:06:01,481 --> 01:06:03,430
I've had comics.
I'm the Goto.

1536
01:06:03,431 --> 01:06:06,940
When comics get in trouble on the road,
I always get the phone call going,

1537
01:06:06,941 --> 01:06:07,774
hey man,
I'm,

1538
01:06:07,840 --> 01:06:09,550
I need to run something by you.
I'm freaked out.

1539
01:06:09,551 --> 01:06:12,340
Something happened to me.
This ever happened to you.

1540
01:06:13,030 --> 01:06:15,040
And I had a comment.
Call me when I was in DC.

1541
01:06:15,840 --> 01:06:19,000
He was like a am I got slipped something
last night.

1542
01:06:19,360 --> 01:06:20,640
And uh,
I don't like.

1543
01:06:20,641 --> 01:06:22,090
I'm,
I'm still a little sketchy,

1544
01:06:22,510 --> 01:06:23,343
but I want to just run it by you.
I know that this stuff's happened to 

1545
01:06:25,001 --> 01:06:25,640
you.
And I talked to him.

1546
01:06:25,640 --> 01:06:27,590
We talked for about an hour and he was 
getting.

1547
01:06:27,600 --> 01:06:28,210
Then he was like,
alright,

1548
01:06:28,210 --> 01:06:29,240
I gotta go to the show.
I appreciate it,

1549
01:06:29,241 --> 01:06:30,074
man.
I feel like a lot better knowing that 

1550
01:06:30,791 --> 01:06:32,070
I'm not the only one that's happened 
too.

1551
01:06:33,370 --> 01:06:34,270
But yeah,
I mean you,

1552
01:06:34,320 --> 01:06:35,170
you're,
you know,

1553
01:06:35,440 --> 01:06:36,210
people can do it right

1554
01:06:36,210 --> 01:06:38,370
there.
You never know someone's motivations.

1555
01:06:38,371 --> 01:06:39,204
I mean you get.
It's nice to believe that almost 

1556
01:06:41,671 --> 01:06:44,060
everybody you meet is great and most 
people,

1557
01:06:44,061 --> 01:06:44,894
y'all look,
you could live your life and never made 

1558
01:06:46,590 --> 01:06:49,050
one single sick fuck wants to roofie 
you.

1559
01:06:49,200 --> 01:06:52,710
You can be really lucky or you could run
into one.

1560
01:06:53,040 --> 01:06:55,140
The first night you decided to take 
drinks from people.

1561
01:06:55,170 --> 01:06:57,360
That's happened to a lot of people,
especially women.

1562
01:06:57,750 --> 01:06:59,910
I know so many women who have been 
drugged.

1563
01:07:00,150 --> 01:07:01,740
Oh,
so many girls.

1564
01:07:01,741 --> 01:07:04,920
I've dated girls who are friends with 
people I've dated,

1565
01:07:05,220 --> 01:07:07,800
girls who are dating,
friends of mine,

1566
01:07:07,801 --> 01:07:11,220
got drugged at a bar.
It's so fucking common.

1567
01:07:11,520 --> 01:07:12,353
Every girl,
when she gets a drink from the bar has 

1568
01:07:14,851 --> 01:07:18,770
to literally keep her eye on the drink.
The whole,

1569
01:07:18,810 --> 01:07:21,390
she gets it from the bartender or some.
If somebody gives it to her,

1570
01:07:21,600 --> 01:07:22,980
boy,
you're already taking a chance.

1571
01:07:23,070 --> 01:07:25,170
You've already lost the chain of 
custody,

1572
01:07:25,290 --> 01:07:27,990
right?
Some guy grabs it from the bartender who

1573
01:07:27,991 --> 01:07:28,824
knows what he did before he gives it to 
you and there's a bunch of twisted 

1574
01:07:32,401 --> 01:07:34,050
fucking men out there,
man.

1575
01:07:34,090 --> 01:07:35,740
Really?
There's fucked up people everywhere,

1576
01:07:35,741 --> 01:07:36,574
but there is a lot of fucked up men.
I think we've been talking about this a 

1577
01:07:39,791 --> 01:07:40,624
lot.
This bill cosby thing that I think that 

1578
01:07:42,551 --> 01:07:45,400
that was a part of what men did back 
then.

1579
01:07:45,480 --> 01:07:46,840
Oh,
it was super common.

1580
01:07:46,890 --> 01:07:47,940
Yeah.
We'll uh,

1581
01:07:48,100 --> 01:07:49,150
uh,
hugh hefner,

1582
01:07:49,500 --> 01:07:51,320
he used to call him panty droppers and 
that,

1583
01:07:51,321 --> 01:07:52,290
this,
this is like,

1584
01:07:52,300 --> 01:07:54,100
noted that he like,
oh,

1585
01:07:54,101 --> 01:07:55,900
there was nothing wrong with giving a 
girl a quileute.

1586
01:07:55,920 --> 01:07:56,753
It's a panty dropper.
Some girl wrote a book and said that 

1587
01:07:58,541 --> 01:08:00,750
when she first met half,
he offered her food.

1588
01:08:01,160 --> 01:08:01,761
Yeah.
But see,

1589
01:08:01,761 --> 01:08:04,220
here's one thing.
Do you want to play loot?

1590
01:08:04,280 --> 01:08:05,090
Yes,
I do.

1591
01:08:05,090 --> 01:08:08,180
You give someone a quaalude and they 
take it and then they're fucked up.

1592
01:08:09,710 --> 01:08:10,543
Is another thing to give someone 
acquainted when they don't know what 

1593
01:08:11,901 --> 01:08:13,130
they're taking that.
Yes.

1594
01:08:13,310 --> 01:08:15,560
And I think he did that a lot and I that
was,

1595
01:08:15,790 --> 01:08:17,690
they used to call it slipping someone to
Mickey.

1596
01:08:17,691 --> 01:08:18,524
Yeah,
Bill Cosby.

1597
01:08:19,000 --> 01:08:23,030
And that's a different animal.
And there's another thing giving someone

1598
01:08:23,031 --> 01:08:25,640
something because you want to fuck them 
and they don't want to fuck you.

1599
01:08:26,010 --> 01:08:27,110
Let go.
You don't want to fuck me.

1600
01:08:27,111 --> 01:08:27,944
Hey,
you want to call a loot?

1601
01:08:27,950 --> 01:08:30,770
And then now you're gonna fuck me.
Because you know,

1602
01:08:31,710 --> 01:08:32,543
it's just,
it's just something really fucked up 

1603
01:08:34,191 --> 01:08:35,300
about wanting that.

1604
01:08:36,050 --> 01:08:38,850
Oh I,
I say to,

1605
01:08:38,900 --> 01:08:41,510
I kind of say out loud with all this 
sexual harassment,

1606
01:08:41,511 --> 01:08:43,940
all the dirt that's going around and go,
how did I dodge?

1607
01:08:44,430 --> 01:08:48,410
How did I like how like is it because I 
got married younger like,

1608
01:08:48,411 --> 01:08:50,060
but I just never was into that.

1609
01:08:50,430 --> 01:08:51,263
So you're not a producer who's holding 
employment over someone's head and 

1610
01:08:55,531 --> 01:09:00,270
trying to get them to suck your deck.
There is a big difference between having

1611
01:09:00,760 --> 01:09:01,593
unsavory male behavior that would be 
difficult to defend because you're 

1612
01:09:04,081 --> 01:09:07,920
trying to get laid versus what you're 
seeing it.

1613
01:09:07,921 --> 01:09:08,754
When people were furious about,
rightly so is predatory behavior by a 

1614
01:09:13,681 --> 01:09:17,880
person who's in power affecting 
someone's employment and career.

1615
01:09:18,120 --> 01:09:18,953
Right.
And I was talking with Whitney Cummings 

1616
01:09:20,760 --> 01:09:25,050
about this and you know,
because Whitney obviously she's a female

1617
01:09:25,260 --> 01:09:27,450
prominent actress,
comedian,

1618
01:09:27,720 --> 01:09:29,370
she's been,
she knows and yeah,

1619
01:09:29,371 --> 01:09:30,204
and she knows a lot of these people and 
she was saying what you're not hearing 

1620
01:09:32,821 --> 01:09:36,780
is how many women sucked his dick and 
got a big part,

1621
01:09:36,930 --> 01:09:39,600
sucked his dick and made it into a 
movie.

1622
01:09:40,050 --> 01:09:43,260
Got like five.
Like it was a negotiating tactic.

1623
01:09:43,440 --> 01:09:45,450
Like he,
he was just,

1624
01:09:45,900 --> 01:09:47,550
that's how he dated.

1625
01:09:47,970 --> 01:09:51,480
I mean that's how he got laid.
It's like straight up predatory shit.

1626
01:09:51,630 --> 01:09:53,610
And then her friend had a really good 
point.

1627
01:09:53,790 --> 01:09:57,240
She was like,
what's fucked up about it is not that he

1628
01:09:57,241 --> 01:09:58,021
did it.
She goes,

1629
01:09:58,021 --> 01:09:58,854
obviously that's fucked up,
but what's also fucked up is that that 

1630
01:10:01,171 --> 01:10:02,004
was the culture.
That's what those guys did before there 

1631
01:10:05,251 --> 01:10:06,084
was the internet before.
Like there was any accountability at 

1632
01:10:07,861 --> 01:10:09,600
all,
like in the seventies and the sixties.

1633
01:10:09,601 --> 01:10:10,434
Like that is what all of those guys did 
and that's what they did like in a lot 

1634
01:10:14,281 --> 01:10:15,114
of those starlets that that's how you 
got to pay to play and that's what they 

1635
01:10:18,781 --> 01:10:20,310
did.
They had to fuck these guys.

1636
01:10:20,311 --> 01:10:22,650
Like that's literally how it all went 
down.

1637
01:10:22,920 --> 01:10:23,760
It's crazy.

1638
01:10:23,840 --> 01:10:24,673
I always thought that.
I always thought that whenever I got 

1639
01:10:26,271 --> 01:10:29,810
something like Elliot Gould and I did a 
pilot together and he left his number in

1640
01:10:29,811 --> 01:10:31,340
my,
in my dressing room,

1641
01:10:31,420 --> 01:10:32,810
he was like,
we should go to dinner one night.

1642
01:10:32,811 --> 01:10:33,531
And I was like,
ah,

1643
01:10:33,531 --> 01:10:34,364
I'm gonna.
Have to fuck him.

1644
01:10:36,750 --> 01:10:37,440
And I kept.
No,

1645
01:10:37,440 --> 01:10:38,273
I kept dodging him.
I kept dodging him and he'd call and be 

1646
01:10:40,091 --> 01:10:40,690
like,
bird,

1647
01:10:40,690 --> 01:10:41,523
it's elliot.
I still would like to take you to a 

1648
01:10:42,971 --> 01:10:44,110
seafood dinner.
And I was like,

1649
01:10:44,111 --> 01:10:44,944
okay.
So then we went to seafood dinner down 

1650
01:10:47,111 --> 01:10:47,944
in Venice and it was just dinner.
It was really nice and we talked about 

1651
01:10:52,100 --> 01:10:53,620
this guy.
He's a really sweet guy.

1652
01:10:54,510 --> 01:10:56,050
Even at the end of the night I was like,
you're not gonna.

1653
01:10:56,051 --> 01:10:56,884
Try to kiss me or anything.

1654
01:10:58,540 --> 01:10:59,170
Birds,

1655
01:10:59,170 --> 01:11:01,930
not really into bears.
He was such a sweet guy and then,

1656
01:11:01,980 --> 01:11:05,350
and then randomly I saw him like five 
years later or maybe more than that,

1657
01:11:05,351 --> 01:11:06,184
maybe eight years later,
and I had Georgia and Eila and I was 

1658
01:11:07,991 --> 01:11:08,824
with Leanna and I was with my dad and we
were walking from a Baja fresh by the 

1659
01:11:13,141 --> 01:11:13,974
screen actors guild.
We were walking out of Baja fresh and 

1660
01:11:15,840 --> 01:11:17,790
Elliot saw me and he was like,
Bert,

1661
01:11:17,880 --> 01:11:19,570
it's early.
It was like,

1662
01:11:19,710 --> 01:11:20,350
hey,
Elliot.

1663
01:11:20,350 --> 01:11:21,180
And My,
My,

1664
01:11:21,180 --> 01:11:21,931
my wife's dad,
like,

1665
01:11:21,931 --> 01:11:23,430
you know,
Elliot Gold knows,

1666
01:11:23,431 --> 01:11:24,950
like he gave me.
He,

1667
01:11:24,951 --> 01:11:25,620
he,
uh,

1668
01:11:25,620 --> 01:11:26,453
we were in this pilot together and he 
was playing a blind guy and we were 

1669
01:11:29,610 --> 01:11:31,590
doing pickups.
We just couldn't get the line right.

1670
01:11:31,980 --> 01:11:33,570
The line was at,
the girl came in,

1671
01:11:34,340 --> 01:11:36,360
uh,
Liz Vassey came in.

1672
01:11:36,480 --> 01:11:37,313
She was the bride.
We were at the bout to get married and 

1673
01:11:39,271 --> 01:11:40,330
she sees us all drinking.

1674
01:11:40,350 --> 01:11:41,580
I'm the best man.
And she's like,

1675
01:11:42,120 --> 01:11:42,511
Hey,
wait,

1676
01:11:42,511 --> 01:11:44,580
can I have a beer?
And then I'm supposed to go.

1677
01:11:45,030 --> 01:11:46,680
Of course,
that's all I had to say,

1678
01:11:46,770 --> 01:11:49,320
of course,
but I wasn't getting the.

1679
01:11:49,321 --> 01:11:50,154
Of course right.
They wanted the course to really 

1680
01:11:51,631 --> 01:11:54,090
navigate that,
that me and her were cool,

1681
01:11:54,120 --> 01:11:55,650
like they wanted to make sure that we 
were cool.

1682
01:11:56,040 --> 01:11:58,290
So I mean the whole networks,
their CBS is all there.

1683
01:11:58,291 --> 01:12:00,450
It's like 1130 at night.
We've shot the pilot,

1684
01:12:00,451 --> 01:12:01,284
we just need this pickup.
I did it like 12 times and then elliot 

1685
01:12:03,750 --> 01:12:05,980
is a blind guy behind me and he leans 
into mind.

1686
01:12:05,990 --> 01:12:08,010
He was bird,
how would you say it?

1687
01:12:08,610 --> 01:12:09,271
And I said,
what do you mean?

1688
01:12:09,271 --> 01:12:11,280
He go,
say it the way you'd say it.

1689
01:12:11,850 --> 01:12:13,980
Then just stands back up.
So she comes in,

1690
01:12:14,340 --> 01:12:15,300
she goes,
uh,

1691
01:12:15,630 --> 01:12:16,470
hey,
can I have a beer?

1692
01:12:16,471 --> 01:12:19,860
I go as a duck's ass watertight.
Get over here and everyone laughs,

1693
01:12:19,861 --> 01:12:22,470
gets a big laugh.
And then the director comes up,

1694
01:12:22,840 --> 01:12:23,790
goes right into my face.
He goes,

1695
01:12:23,880 --> 01:12:24,713
hey,
you're fucking me in the fucking ass 

1696
01:12:27,181 --> 01:12:28,440
right now.
Do you understand me?

1697
01:12:28,500 --> 01:12:31,950
You are fucking me in the fucking ass.
You will never work again.

1698
01:12:31,951 --> 01:12:33,570
And he walks away.
Elliott state of mind when it goes,

1699
01:12:34,110 --> 01:12:34,943
sorry,

1700
01:12:37,640 --> 01:12:39,680
never work again.
Fucking the guy.

1701
01:12:39,681 --> 01:12:42,960
Poor guy was losing his mind,
but still the,

1702
01:12:42,961 --> 01:12:43,430
the,
the,

1703
01:12:43,430 --> 01:12:45,160
the.
So that's Kinda,

1704
01:12:45,180 --> 01:12:48,410
I mean it's not the same thing as the 
sexual harassment,

1705
01:12:48,411 --> 01:12:51,530
but as there's this thing of the power 
over you,

1706
01:12:51,770 --> 01:12:55,880
the power to like literally hold your 
career hostage,

1707
01:12:56,030 --> 01:12:58,700
you will never work again.
Like that is the,

1708
01:12:58,850 --> 01:13:00,990
that's always the big threat.
That black.

1709
01:13:00,991 --> 01:13:01,824
I mean,
how many people have you heard were 

1710
01:13:02,320 --> 01:13:03,830
blackballed,
right?

1711
01:13:04,010 --> 01:13:04,843
You always hear that.
You always see like Brett Butler was 

1712
01:13:07,140 --> 01:13:10,070
blackballed member just to be grace 
under fire.

1713
01:13:10,430 --> 01:13:11,390
She used to be on that show.

1714
01:13:11,480 --> 01:13:12,650
Then you end.
By the way,

1715
01:13:12,651 --> 01:13:13,484
let's just talk about the side stories 
you'd hear about Brett Butler that they 

1716
01:13:15,681 --> 01:13:17,810
share when you were young and you'd go 
into a meeting.

1717
01:13:17,811 --> 01:13:18,950
You don't want to turn into Brett 
Butler.

1718
01:13:19,170 --> 01:13:21,230
Stay sitting on locking yourself up in a
tree,

1719
01:13:21,231 --> 01:13:23,270
throwing oranges at everybody.
You're like,

1720
01:13:23,310 --> 01:13:25,220
what?
I can't talk about it.

1721
01:13:26,030 --> 01:13:27,050
And then you're like,
what the fuck?

1722
01:13:27,051 --> 01:13:27,884
Kind of crazy person that's propeller.
I met Brett Butler doing good morning 

1723
01:13:30,201 --> 01:13:31,034
America one time.
She was the sweetest person in the 

1724
01:13:32,211 --> 01:13:32,980
world.

1725
01:13:32,980 --> 01:13:34,810
She went through some shit.
Apparently.

1726
01:13:35,050 --> 01:13:36,710
She's been pretty open about it,
you know,

1727
01:13:36,730 --> 01:13:41,260
and she did Charlie Sheen's newer show,
the newer show and in the newer show,

1728
01:13:41,261 --> 01:13:43,270
like she was kind of like,
that was part of the premise,

1729
01:13:43,271 --> 01:13:46,300
like she was a bartender.
He was kind of alluding to the fact that

1730
01:13:46,301 --> 01:13:47,134
she'd made some gigantic mistakes and it
was kind of like a play to her to who 

1731
01:13:52,120 --> 01:13:55,300
she actually was,
but she was on that show,

1732
01:13:55,390 --> 01:13:59,770
grace under fire and Chuck Lorre,
the same guy that did two and a half men

1733
01:13:59,771 --> 01:14:00,604
with Charlie Sheen was the guy running 
it and she didn't really drink in his 

1734
01:14:02,891 --> 01:14:06,610
face and said something horrible and 
nasty.

1735
01:14:06,611 --> 01:14:08,560
I don't know what she said.
I don't want to misquote,

1736
01:14:08,620 --> 01:14:10,860
but it was something along the lines of,
you know,

1737
01:14:11,080 --> 01:14:13,540
wonder why your life left you if you 
write like this.

1738
01:14:13,840 --> 01:14:14,500
Something along those.

1739
01:14:14,500 --> 01:14:15,610
What really.
Yeah,

1740
01:14:15,611 --> 01:14:16,444
yeah,
yeah.

1741
01:14:16,540 --> 01:14:17,620
Like people.
Look,

1742
01:14:18,220 --> 01:14:19,053
I've seen people lose their fucking mind
when they go from being no one to like 

1743
01:14:25,841 --> 01:14:28,420
in a short amount of time being the 
star.

1744
01:14:28,421 --> 01:14:31,190
It's grace under fire with Brett Butler.
It's Roseanna.

1745
01:14:31,300 --> 01:14:33,250
Roseanne talked about it when she was on
the podcast,

1746
01:14:33,550 --> 01:14:35,020
she was saying,
I lost my fucking mind.

1747
01:14:35,210 --> 01:14:36,830
I went crazy.
She's like,

1748
01:14:36,850 --> 01:14:37,683
and she's,
you know,

1749
01:14:37,710 --> 01:14:40,800
Roseanne's the best by the way.
You never meet her A.

1750
01:14:40,990 --> 01:14:43,570
Yeah,
she's fucking awesome.

1751
01:14:43,571 --> 01:14:46,060
I love that lady.
I love her.

1752
01:14:46,540 --> 01:14:48,040
But she was talking about it.
She's like,

1753
01:14:48,041 --> 01:14:49,570
I went crazy.
She goes,

1754
01:14:49,600 --> 01:14:50,433
you know,
all of a sudden I went from being this 

1755
01:14:52,640 --> 01:14:53,950
housewife,
you know,

1756
01:14:53,951 --> 01:14:58,000
having no money to being the star of 
this giant Sitcom.

1757
01:14:58,001 --> 01:15:01,030
That was like at the time when she was 
on Roseanne.

1758
01:15:01,060 --> 01:15:03,280
What was it like for channels?
Uh,

1759
01:15:03,281 --> 01:15:06,230
and that was a legit show show.

1760
01:15:06,310 --> 01:15:10,060
John Goodman's or fucking husband at 
fucking show his giant.

1761
01:15:10,300 --> 01:15:13,040
She was the queen of the world.
They're redoing the.

1762
01:15:13,140 --> 01:15:16,870
I know the executive producer buddies 
was producing it.

1763
01:15:16,900 --> 01:15:17,711
That's amazing.
Yeah.

1764
01:15:17,711 --> 01:15:18,431
He was like,
he's like,

1765
01:15:18,431 --> 01:15:20,440
dude,
it's so much fucking fun.

1766
01:15:20,560 --> 01:15:21,460
I'm sure.
I was like,

1767
01:15:21,461 --> 01:15:21,851
really?
He's like,

1768
01:15:21,851 --> 01:15:22,684
yeah,
he's talked about the writing staff is 

1769
01:15:23,821 --> 01:15:26,350
like Norm Mcdonald,
Morgan Murphy,

1770
01:15:26,820 --> 01:15:29,020
just killer or killers,
killers.

1771
01:15:29,470 --> 01:15:30,303
But you know,
but Roseanne is in a position that you 

1772
01:15:32,951 --> 01:15:33,784
and I will never be in because it's not 
even possible to be in that position 

1773
01:15:37,271 --> 01:15:38,104
anymore because there's so many more 
stars now because there's so many more 

1774
01:15:41,261 --> 01:15:43,540
venues are so many more channels.
Like you were just talking about.

1775
01:15:43,541 --> 01:15:44,374
We're talking about impractical jokers.
Think about those guys were giant right 

1776
01:15:46,301 --> 01:15:47,050
now.
Right?

1777
01:15:47,050 --> 01:15:49,280
Those guys are on true TV.
W,

1778
01:15:49,290 --> 01:15:51,280
what the fuck is true tv?
Who knows?

1779
01:15:51,281 --> 01:15:52,000
Even watching that.

1780
01:15:52,000 --> 01:15:52,751
Right?
It doesn't matter.

1781
01:15:52,751 --> 01:15:54,520
They made it through a true TV.
Right?

1782
01:15:54,680 --> 01:15:56,740
Sebastian is a giant star.
From what?

1783
01:15:56,741 --> 01:15:59,410
From fucking showtime.
Who the hell saw that coming?

1784
01:15:59,411 --> 01:16:00,630
Right?
The only cents.

1785
01:16:00,700 --> 01:16:01,533
Gallagher Gallagher was the last guy to 
get giant through showtime and now it's 

1786
01:16:04,901 --> 01:16:05,734
Avastin.
Right?

1787
01:16:06,180 --> 01:16:08,570
Hen Comics in the country making money.
Sebastian.

1788
01:16:09,200 --> 01:16:10,033
Thank you.
Think about all the different 

1789
01:16:12,521 --> 01:16:15,130
possibilities.
All the different youtube stars,

1790
01:16:15,340 --> 01:16:18,070
all the different cable shows,
all of the different.

1791
01:16:18,130 --> 01:16:20,260
You know,
there's so many netflix show,

1792
01:16:20,261 --> 01:16:23,230
so many standup specials.
It's a different world.

1793
01:16:23,231 --> 01:16:27,460
Now the star,
she was one of maybe 20 stars.

1794
01:16:27,461 --> 01:16:29,520
You know what I'm saying?
Now there's 20,000.

1795
01:16:29,730 --> 01:16:32,390
It's a different world.
It is enough,

1796
01:16:32,420 --> 01:16:33,253
but I,
but I think the Hubris is still rides 

1797
01:16:35,141 --> 01:16:35,741
with it.
I know,

1798
01:16:35,741 --> 01:16:36,574
I know I'm guilty of it at times,
but you can get carried away and also 

1799
01:16:39,371 --> 01:16:41,680
the pressure of a show rides on your 
back too.

1800
01:16:41,681 --> 01:16:43,240
That's another thing to take into 
consideration.

1801
01:16:43,241 --> 01:16:44,074
You have all these other people that are
around you and they all have their own 

1802
01:16:46,121 --> 01:16:46,954
little thing.
Then they're fucking with you and it 

1803
01:16:49,330 --> 01:16:54,330
erodes your own concentration and your 
own vision and sometimes like,

1804
01:16:54,431 --> 01:16:54,940
hey,
hey,

1805
01:16:54,940 --> 01:16:56,380
hey,
it's my fucking show.

1806
01:16:56,560 --> 01:17:01,500
It's the Bert Kreischer experience.
Everybody's shocked off.

1807
01:17:01,510 --> 01:17:02,560
Fuck up.

1808
01:17:04,770 --> 01:17:06,170
Give me a drink.
You know?

1809
01:17:06,370 --> 01:17:07,570
I mean,
that's how it all starts.

1810
01:17:07,571 --> 01:17:10,040
I mean that's,
that's probably

1811
01:17:10,040 --> 01:17:11,940
what happened with Charlie Sheen.
You know,

1812
01:17:11,960 --> 01:17:13,730
it's probably what happens with a lot of
these people.

1813
01:17:13,731 --> 01:17:15,770
They just get,
they get whacked out.

1814
01:17:16,330 --> 01:17:17,163
And I think also there's a,
there's a thing that happens too when 

1815
01:17:19,911 --> 01:17:20,744
you do a bad show.
It's a particular type of off the rails 

1816
01:17:23,810 --> 01:17:26,360
when you know you're doing an 
unsatisfying bad show.

1817
01:17:26,361 --> 01:17:28,690
And I think that was one of the things 
that was happening to Charlie Sheen News

1818
01:17:28,700 --> 01:17:32,840
on two and a half men because that was a
bad show and he was a great actor.

1819
01:17:32,960 --> 01:17:36,620
Platoon treat.
I mean go back and look at his,

1820
01:17:36,680 --> 01:17:37,513
his,
his catalog of films that he was in 

1821
01:17:38,990 --> 01:17:39,823
amazing movies.
Charlie Sheen was legit and then all of 

1822
01:17:42,471 --> 01:17:43,304
a sudden he's delivering these lucky 
punchlines to a canned laff machine and 

1823
01:17:50,600 --> 01:17:55,600
he's just doing blow and he's got HIV 
and he's just fucking.

1824
01:17:55,940 --> 01:17:57,660
Who knows what he's doing.
What,

1825
01:17:57,680 --> 01:17:59,990
how do you even get HIV?
I mean he might be the.

1826
01:18:00,000 --> 01:18:01,700
If,
if he got it through straight sex,

1827
01:18:01,701 --> 01:18:04,160
he might be the only guy ever.
That's what they say.

1828
01:18:04,330 --> 01:18:05,870
Yeah.
Like literally who else?

1829
01:18:05,990 --> 01:18:09,930
You know,
they say Tommy Morrison,

1830
01:18:11,420 --> 01:18:12,560
everybody.
I've heard some things.

1831
01:18:12,561 --> 01:18:13,970
I mean I think,
who knows,

1832
01:18:14,000 --> 01:18:15,830
who knows what people are doing,
who knows?

1833
01:18:15,980 --> 01:18:19,820
But it ain't a whole lot of guys.
It's a tiny little handful.

1834
01:18:20,330 --> 01:18:22,640
I used to have a bit about it really.

1835
01:18:22,950 --> 01:18:23,910
You know,
they say sam,

1836
01:18:24,330 --> 01:18:27,000
they say aids aids is a communicable 
disease.

1837
01:18:27,080 --> 01:18:28,830
Heterosexuals.
He goes,

1838
01:18:31,880 --> 01:18:36,880
it's dance,
it's fucking dance.

1839
01:18:38,950 --> 01:18:39,783
Yeah.
That was his,

1840
01:18:39,790 --> 01:18:41,350
one of his bits.
It got them really,

1841
01:18:41,380 --> 01:18:43,390
really criticized.
But then people were like,

1842
01:18:43,391 --> 01:18:44,410
wait a minute,
is he right?

1843
01:18:45,210 --> 01:18:46,043
Uh,
I had some people from the CDC come to 

1844
01:18:47,471 --> 01:18:52,471
my show in Atlanta one time and we were 
joking around and I said something about

1845
01:18:53,890 --> 01:18:54,880
what was it,
like,

1846
01:18:54,881 --> 01:18:56,230
why,
like tell me about diseases,

1847
01:18:56,231 --> 01:18:57,064
tell me like I'm trying.
I was trying to think of a bit like 

1848
01:18:58,871 --> 01:19:00,790
trying to like pick their brains for 
something.

1849
01:19:01,750 --> 01:19:02,950
And the guy goes,
I'll tell you one joke.

1850
01:19:02,951 --> 01:19:03,970
We have said,
what's that?

1851
01:19:03,971 --> 01:19:04,804
And he goes,
you know what we call a straight guy 

1852
01:19:05,411 --> 01:19:06,071
with AIDS.
I said,

1853
01:19:06,071 --> 01:19:07,000
what?
And he was a liar.

1854
01:19:08,450 --> 01:19:09,680
Wow.
Well,

1855
01:19:09,681 --> 01:19:11,390
it could be an intravenous drug user.

1856
01:19:11,520 --> 01:19:12,353
Yeah.
I mean you could have two uncles die 

1857
01:19:13,991 --> 01:19:16,320
from HIV,
but I think it was drugs.

1858
01:19:16,940 --> 01:19:17,773
Well there's that.
And there's also the medication they 

1859
01:19:19,521 --> 01:19:20,354
give the people that was apparently a 
giant issue in the eighties and the 

1860
01:19:22,821 --> 01:19:27,821
nineties was that act that they were 
giving him act apparently used to be,

1861
01:19:28,930 --> 01:19:31,400
um,
a chemotherapy medication.

1862
01:19:31,640 --> 01:19:34,100
And we were just killing people quicker 
than cancer was.

1863
01:19:34,130 --> 01:19:34,963
So they stopped giving it to cancer 
patients and there was a lot of like 

1864
01:19:38,330 --> 01:19:40,880
real confusing when aids first came 
about,

1865
01:19:41,580 --> 01:19:45,620
there was a lot like her member.
There was some local story,

1866
01:19:45,621 --> 01:19:46,454
some story in Boston about some 
scientists was trying to say that aids 

1867
01:19:50,241 --> 01:19:53,900
was a derivative of the herpes virus.
Yeah,

1868
01:19:53,901 --> 01:19:54,734
they,
they didn't know what the fuck it was 

1869
01:19:55,521 --> 01:19:57,410
when it first burst on the scene.
And by the way,

1870
01:19:57,411 --> 01:19:58,880
dude,
everybody thought they had it,

1871
01:19:59,140 --> 01:20:00,140
you know,
I'm older than you,

1872
01:20:00,141 --> 01:20:05,141
but I got my first blood test for HIV in
1993 and I was shitting my pants.

1873
01:20:07,290 --> 01:20:08,210
I was thinking about every

1874
01:20:08,220 --> 01:20:10,970
one night stand on the road.
Every freaky girl,

1875
01:20:10,971 --> 01:20:12,510
like let's do shots.
Next thing you know,

1876
01:20:12,511 --> 01:20:14,960
your raw dog and some dirty hotel room 
and like,

1877
01:20:15,330 --> 01:20:16,560
oh my God,
am I going to die?

1878
01:20:16,561 --> 01:20:17,420
You know,
you start thinking.

1879
01:20:17,760 --> 01:20:20,280
I was so scared.
So scared.

1880
01:20:20,630 --> 01:20:22,000
And then when it came back clean,
I was like,

1881
01:20:22,610 --> 01:20:25,500
I was like,
I'm only going to wear condoms from here

1882
01:20:25,501 --> 01:20:26,130
on out

1883
01:20:26,130 --> 01:20:28,870
to good clean bill of health when you.
I got mine in [inaudible] 95.

1884
01:20:28,900 --> 01:20:30,490
My first AIDS tests.
Oh,

1885
01:20:30,491 --> 01:20:31,420
that's so nice.
Oh,

1886
01:20:31,421 --> 01:20:32,500
it was terrifying.
And I,

1887
01:20:32,501 --> 01:20:34,540
by the way,
I'd only been with two checks ever,

1888
01:20:35,110 --> 01:20:37,090
but one of the girls had slept around 
with a lot of guys.

1889
01:20:37,600 --> 01:20:40,000
My bitch gave me the clap.
Digi.

1890
01:20:40,120 --> 01:20:40,953
Yeah.
Only been with two checks and I got to 

1891
01:20:42,131 --> 01:20:43,570
clap.
That's hilarious.

1892
01:20:44,330 --> 01:20:46,110
The crabs?
No,

1893
01:20:46,320 --> 01:20:47,930
it went straight to the clap.
The doctorate.

1894
01:20:47,980 --> 01:20:50,080
I went into the doctor,
he just got back from Russia.

1895
01:20:50,110 --> 01:20:52,840
She slept with my best friend was one of
the guys.

1896
01:20:52,841 --> 01:20:54,940
She had slept with a few.
I get the clap,

1897
01:20:55,600 --> 01:20:58,540
it's burning.
I go into the doctor and I'm like,

1898
01:20:58,541 --> 01:21:00,010
uh,
I remember like a burning sensation,

1899
01:21:00,011 --> 01:21:02,050
but I'm trying to get in front of this.
I'm like,

1900
01:21:02,051 --> 01:21:02,884
you know,
I did a hike in Switzerland and I drank 

1901
01:21:04,631 --> 01:21:06,100
out of a trough so it's probably through
that.

1902
01:21:06,101 --> 01:21:07,250
And he was like,
uh,

1903
01:21:07,270 --> 01:21:08,980
no.
Did you fuck a cow?

1904
01:21:09,010 --> 01:21:09,920
He's the.

1905
01:21:14,100 --> 01:21:16,120
He goes,
you got the clap.

1906
01:21:16,121 --> 01:21:18,220
But we've been fucking around by the way
now.

1907
01:21:18,280 --> 01:21:19,113
Like I was 22 at the time.
Now I realized this guy was probably 

1908
01:21:20,681 --> 01:21:21,880
just 27,
you know,

1909
01:21:21,881 --> 01:21:23,860
he wasn't,
wasn't grown up just a kid,

1910
01:21:24,220 --> 01:21:25,540
and he goes,
have you been fucking around?

1911
01:21:25,541 --> 01:21:27,310
I said,
I just got back from Europe.

1912
01:21:27,311 --> 01:21:29,110
I hadn't had sex with anybody.
He's like,

1913
01:21:29,111 --> 01:21:30,400
oh,
your girlfriend's cheating on you.

1914
01:21:31,150 --> 01:21:32,800
I was like,
no,

1915
01:21:32,801 --> 01:21:33,634
I don't think so.
Isn't it funny to them it's like so 

1916
01:21:35,141 --> 01:21:36,790
obvious and objective,
you know?

1917
01:21:36,850 --> 01:21:37,331
It's like,
come on,

1918
01:21:37,331 --> 01:21:37,990
man,
your girlfriends,

1919
01:21:37,990 --> 01:21:39,630
it happens all the time.
No,

1920
01:21:39,670 --> 01:21:40,211
no,
no,

1921
01:21:40,211 --> 01:21:41,290
no,
not magdalen.

1922
01:21:41,950 --> 01:21:43,210
She's a rose.
She's beautiful.

1923
01:21:43,211 --> 01:21:45,880
She's the impossible.
He goes,

1924
01:21:45,881 --> 01:21:46,990
well,
let me ask you a question.

1925
01:21:47,170 --> 01:21:48,003
When you go to a bar,
Do you and your Dick Split up so we can 

1926
01:21:49,361 --> 01:21:51,520
cover more territory?
I was like,

1927
01:21:51,550 --> 01:21:52,060
excuse me?

1928
01:21:52,060 --> 01:21:53,110
He goes,
when you go to a bar,

1929
01:21:53,111 --> 01:21:53,944
when you go to young's,
do you and your dick takeoff in 

1930
01:21:54,821 --> 01:21:55,654
different territories to cover more,
more surface area and then meet up at 

1931
01:21:58,331 --> 01:21:59,800
the end of the night going,
this is who we fucked.

1932
01:22:00,100 --> 01:22:00,521
I go,
no,

1933
01:22:00,521 --> 01:22:01,840
and he goes,
then your girlfriend's cheating on you.

1934
01:22:01,841 --> 01:22:04,180
Still Horman get rid of her.
She's a hoarder.

1935
01:22:04,400 --> 01:22:05,740
She's a hoarder.
I remember being like,

1936
01:22:05,741 --> 01:22:07,840
I thought he was a grown up.
Now I know he's just a kid.

1937
01:22:07,841 --> 01:22:09,200
He's just a kid.
He's like,

1938
01:22:09,201 --> 01:22:10,034
yeah,
and I was like,

1939
01:22:10,060 --> 01:22:11,690
that's impossible.
Gives us,

1940
01:22:11,710 --> 01:22:12,730
man,
I can give you the test,

1941
01:22:13,160 --> 01:22:15,310
I can give you the test if you want or I
can just give you the medication,

1942
01:22:15,311 --> 01:22:16,990
you can get rid of it.
And I was like,

1943
01:22:16,991 --> 01:22:17,621
uh,
uh,

1944
01:22:17,621 --> 01:22:18,610
given the test,
it's,

1945
01:22:18,670 --> 01:22:21,370
I'm telling you if she's not.
And then he did that time.

1946
01:22:21,380 --> 01:22:23,380
Have you ever had the test where they 
put the q tip of your Dick?

1947
01:22:24,130 --> 01:22:25,420
You've never had that?
No,

1948
01:22:26,560 --> 01:22:29,260
it is not rough.
One of the most painful things I've ever

1949
01:22:29,261 --> 01:22:32,590
felt in my entire fucking life puts the 
QTIP.

1950
01:22:32,680 --> 01:22:36,970
How far down Downey swabs it?
He swapped how deep?

1951
01:22:37,090 --> 01:22:39,310
A halfway I guess.
So two inches.

1952
01:22:39,720 --> 01:22:40,553
Well,
I mean halfway for me it was like 

1953
01:22:40,850 --> 01:22:43,840
probably nine.
I didn't get it.

1954
01:22:45,120 --> 01:22:47,110
He probably probably about an inch.

1955
01:22:50,230 --> 01:22:52,860
He goes in and swabs it and as soon as 
he,

1956
01:22:52,861 --> 01:22:53,471
he told me,
he goes,

1957
01:22:53,471 --> 01:22:54,940
grab onto the side of the table,
it's going to hurt.

1958
01:22:55,600 --> 01:22:56,920
And as soon as he did it,
I was like,

1959
01:22:56,921 --> 01:23:00,230
she's a whore,
she's a whore.

1960
01:23:01,060 --> 01:23:03,610
I had a girlfriend and went away.
She went to spring break,

1961
01:23:03,640 --> 01:23:05,200
came back with rug burn on her back

1962
01:23:06,510 --> 01:23:07,870
or lower back.
I was like,

1963
01:23:07,871 --> 01:23:08,704
wow.
She just gave me some cockamamie story 

1964
01:23:11,111 --> 01:23:13,300
about she was drinking and she rubbed up
against a nail.

1965
01:23:13,870 --> 01:23:16,030
She was drinking and leaning up against 
the fence.

1966
01:23:16,031 --> 01:23:17,940
Like you rubbed up against a nail over 
your lower.

1967
01:23:17,941 --> 01:23:18,010
Yeah,

1968
01:23:18,010 --> 01:23:19,120
back what?
He will bear.

1969
01:23:19,121 --> 01:23:19,954
Just a drunk.
You'd have to beat a scratch up your 

1970
01:23:27,851 --> 01:23:32,020
lower back on a nail.
Like it was the dumbest excuse ever.

1971
01:23:32,021 --> 01:23:32,854
And I was like,
okay.

1972
01:23:33,130 --> 01:23:33,963
Oh I that same girl.
We went to New Orleans to Mardi gras 

1973
01:23:36,730 --> 01:23:38,470
houses with my buddies.
My Buddy Mark Osborne.

1974
01:23:38,480 --> 01:23:39,760
I was with my.
All my buddies.

1975
01:23:40,100 --> 01:23:40,933
It was the first time I ever did coke 
were all partying and having a great 

1976
01:23:42,821 --> 01:23:44,080
time.
And they're like,

1977
01:23:44,081 --> 01:23:45,220
Bro,
you got make up some chicks.

1978
01:23:45,221 --> 01:23:45,701
I go,
no man,

1979
01:23:45,701 --> 01:23:47,020
I got a girlfriend I'm not going to.
And they're like,

1980
01:23:47,021 --> 01:23:48,670
you know how many beads I go,
I don't give a fuck.

1981
01:23:48,820 --> 01:23:49,653
I'm not going to cheat on her and then 
we run into her and she was covered in 

1982
01:23:52,391 --> 01:23:53,224
fucking be

1983
01:23:53,740 --> 01:23:54,700
no,

1984
01:23:54,840 --> 01:23:56,790
and my buddies are like,
how do you think she got those?

1985
01:23:56,791 --> 01:23:57,624
I was like,
we took notes to just give them the 

1986
01:23:59,041 --> 01:24:01,120
girls.
Oh,

1987
01:24:01,190 --> 01:24:02,023
sadness.
Thank God for those road to get out of 

1988
01:24:04,651 --> 01:24:05,484
your system to get those like you.
I'm so much more grateful for my wife 

1989
01:24:09,061 --> 01:24:12,330
because she's not that type of person.
I'm glad I had those books.

1990
01:24:12,331 --> 01:24:15,600
Good to lower your expectations too,
because imagine if you married your high

1991
01:24:15,601 --> 01:24:17,730
school sweetheart.
You met when you were 16.

1992
01:24:17,910 --> 01:24:19,890
You fell in love.
She broke your virginity,

1993
01:24:19,891 --> 01:24:20,830
you broke hers,

1994
01:24:21,020 --> 01:24:24,170
and then one day when you're 35 you come
home and she's getting gorilla.

1995
01:24:24,171 --> 01:24:27,140
Fuck her personal trainer who looks like
Emmett Smith.

1996
01:24:27,590 --> 01:24:31,280
He's just stuffing her in the corner of 
a couch and just fucking hammering it.

1997
01:24:31,700 --> 01:24:33,860
You walk in the house,
it smells like Pussy,

1998
01:24:33,861 --> 01:24:34,694
like what?
It smelled like pussy and ass holes in 

1999
01:24:35,961 --> 01:24:37,340
here.
Like what the fuck is going on?

2000
01:24:37,460 --> 01:24:42,460
And you hear and she's like

2001
01:24:46,200 --> 01:24:47,640
making a noise.
You've never heard.

2002
01:24:48,120 --> 01:24:50,490
You walk in the room right when he's 
just interface.

2003
01:24:52,350 --> 01:24:55,110
Imagine the heartbreak,
see now,

2004
01:24:55,140 --> 01:24:56,700
like having gone,
you know what happened to me,

2005
01:24:57,090 --> 01:25:00,150
there's a girl that I was dating,
we've heard like kind of.

2006
01:25:00,151 --> 01:25:00,984
I don't think we were like,
we weren't like boyfriend and 

2007
01:25:02,821 --> 01:25:03,654
girlfriend,
but we were definitely having sex at 

2008
01:25:05,131 --> 01:25:10,131
fooling around and I think I was 17 at 
the time and she was 16 and she,

2009
01:25:13,160 --> 01:25:13,993
I,
I used to have a paper route or I'd get 

2010
01:25:16,201 --> 01:25:19,770
up in the morning and deliver papers and
I would deliver papers every day,

2011
01:25:19,771 --> 01:25:23,310
365 days a year.
So I was up at 4:00

2012
01:25:23,311 --> 01:25:25,560
in the morning on Sunday.
Sunday was the big day.

2013
01:25:25,860 --> 01:25:28,530
So Saturday night people are out 
drinking.

2014
01:25:28,560 --> 01:25:29,393
They're still out.
I'm getting up in the morning and I'm 

2015
01:25:30,601 --> 01:25:31,200
leaving.
Right.

2016
01:25:31,200 --> 01:25:35,130
So it,
it avoided a lot of nonsense in my life.

2017
01:25:35,630 --> 01:25:37,380
Like as far as partying when I was 
younger,

2018
01:25:37,381 --> 01:25:39,580
I've barely party when I was in high 
school,

2019
01:25:40,080 --> 01:25:40,913
barely jealous because I was fighting,
I was fighting and I was getting up in 

2020
01:25:43,681 --> 01:25:45,450
the morning and delivering newspapers.

2021
01:25:45,450 --> 01:25:48,900
So those two things just knocked out all
the booze I gives a few moment,

2022
01:25:48,901 --> 01:25:49,734
like one or two times at parties,
a handful of times maybe I drank and 

2023
01:25:52,621 --> 01:25:54,240
smoked a joint or something,
Sony.

2024
01:25:54,540 --> 01:25:58,080
But most of the time squeaky clean,
just worried about,

2025
01:25:58,260 --> 01:25:59,093
you know,
being hung over and getting my ass 

2026
01:26:00,541 --> 01:26:02,490
kicked and training and stuff like that.
So yeah,

2027
01:26:02,491 --> 01:26:04,400
it was a fucked childhood but we've 
worked out.

2028
01:26:04,430 --> 01:26:06,560
But anyway,
I get up at 4:00

2029
01:26:06,561 --> 01:26:07,820
in the morning and go deliver 
newspapers.

2030
01:26:07,821 --> 01:26:08,654
I go outside.
This girl that I was dating is making 

2031
01:26:10,491 --> 01:26:13,640
out with one of my friends in the front 
seat of a car.

2032
01:26:13,970 --> 01:26:14,803
They're both fucked up right in front of
my house because the guy was my friend 

2033
01:26:19,281 --> 01:26:20,114
who was also friends with my sister and 
my sister was friends with the girl and 

2034
01:26:23,361 --> 01:26:26,480
so the two of them were small town 
Newton,

2035
01:26:26,481 --> 01:26:29,370
upper falls.
We lived in a small town just outside of

2036
01:26:29,480 --> 01:26:32,270
Boston and they're making out right in 
front of my house.

2037
01:26:32,630 --> 01:26:33,463
So I'm,
I'm like,

2038
01:26:33,770 --> 01:26:36,410
I'm awake sober.
I'm looking at them.

2039
01:26:36,411 --> 01:26:37,244
They're probably drunk during the car,
grabbing tits and Dicks and shit like 

2040
01:26:41,631 --> 01:26:44,170
that and I just slammed my hand on the 
hood and what,

2041
01:26:46,770 --> 01:26:51,310
and they both looked at me and then I 
got in the car and drove off.

2042
01:26:51,780 --> 01:26:52,501
Oh,
he shut up.

2043
01:26:52,501 --> 01:26:53,590
Yeah,
but it was good.

2044
01:26:53,710 --> 01:26:54,820
It was good.
I was like,

2045
01:26:54,821 --> 01:26:55,391
good.
Okay.

2046
01:26:55,391 --> 01:26:57,370
Because I wasn't sure like are we 
dating?

2047
01:26:57,371 --> 01:26:59,080
We boys,
boyfriend and girlfriend.

2048
01:26:59,081 --> 01:26:59,914
Like I went up to your girlfriend,
are we going to do the answer to be 

2049
01:27:01,570 --> 01:27:02,360
boyfriend,
girlfriend?

2050
01:27:02,360 --> 01:27:03,193
Who was that kind of thing?
Like are we dating or just fooling 

2051
01:27:04,631 --> 01:27:08,190
around who definitely having sex,
but it was like I just not,

2052
01:27:08,320 --> 01:27:10,940
I just stopped having this one 
girlfriend that I had.

2053
01:27:10,960 --> 01:27:12,640
I didn't know if I wanted a girlfriend 
anymore.

2054
01:27:12,641 --> 01:27:14,920
I was like,
a lot of weird shit when you're 17,

2055
01:27:14,921 --> 01:27:17,800
but it's good to just see that early.
Like,

2056
01:27:17,880 --> 01:27:19,610
Oh yeah,
this is good.

2057
01:27:21,350 --> 01:27:22,183
Like it's good to just be Dev.
Like when I was 18 girl that I was 

2058
01:27:25,481 --> 01:27:27,160
dating,
she moved away.

2059
01:27:27,160 --> 01:27:27,993
She moved to the other side of the state
and I went to visit her and I drove all 

2060
01:27:32,081 --> 01:27:32,914
the way to visit her and when I got 
there she didn't want to have sex with 

2061
01:27:34,421 --> 01:27:35,830
me.
I was like,

2062
01:27:35,831 --> 01:27:38,140
what?
Like she was very manipulative.

2063
01:27:38,200 --> 01:27:39,990
Like she,
she was a very,

2064
01:27:40,720 --> 01:27:41,553
it was obviously she's 17.
She people are weird when they're that 

2065
01:27:44,231 --> 01:27:45,010
age.
Right.

2066
01:27:45,010 --> 01:27:45,843
But she was just clearly knowing that I 
wanted it and just deciding not to and 

2067
01:27:50,010 --> 01:27:53,010
just was,
but now I've.

2068
01:27:53,480 --> 01:27:57,970
That was a super valuable lesson of 
being like a needy Weirdo,

2069
01:27:58,400 --> 01:27:59,233
you know,
because when you're 18 you're so needy 

2070
01:28:01,211 --> 01:28:05,080
and just you can be annoying and if one 
person wants something too much it turns

2071
01:28:05,081 --> 01:28:06,580
the other person off.
You know?

2072
01:28:06,581 --> 01:28:07,414
It's like,
it becomes this weird little thing that 

2073
01:28:08,651 --> 01:28:09,370
you do.

2074
01:28:09,370 --> 01:28:12,370
Dude.
Not to segue into a very creepy area,

2075
01:28:13,200 --> 01:28:14,033
but like Eric saying that saying that 
I've been going through this a little 

2076
01:28:17,231 --> 01:28:18,064
bit.
My oldest daughter is starting to grow 

2077
01:28:19,991 --> 01:28:24,991
up and she doesn't need us as much as.
I mean,

2078
01:28:25,560 --> 01:28:28,510
it goes from being like this little girl
that just everything,

2079
01:28:28,511 --> 01:28:29,590
dad,
let's go on a bike ride,

2080
01:28:29,620 --> 01:28:30,453
dad,
let's go.

2081
01:28:30,460 --> 01:28:31,960
Let's go and catch in the front yard 
until like,

2082
01:28:31,961 --> 01:28:33,020
Hey George,
let's go on a bike ride.

2083
01:28:33,030 --> 01:28:34,150
She's like,
I'm busy.

2084
01:28:34,180 --> 01:28:35,380
How old now?
13.

2085
01:28:35,490 --> 01:28:37,150
And that's when it happens.
Hormones,

2086
01:28:37,151 --> 01:28:38,380
man.
And it's been,

2087
01:28:38,381 --> 01:28:39,214
it's been.
I think I naturally tend to that needy 

2088
01:28:41,891 --> 01:28:44,770
guy like of going like,
and I said to my wife,

2089
01:28:44,771 --> 01:28:47,440
I said,
I'm not handling this properly because I

2090
01:28:47,510 --> 01:28:48,730
want to.
I get angry.

2091
01:28:48,820 --> 01:28:50,050
I go,
come on.

2092
01:28:50,051 --> 01:28:52,210
Like I called her the other day.
I go after the,

2093
01:28:52,510 --> 01:28:53,840
after the rams game I go,
hey,

2094
01:28:53,841 --> 01:28:54,820
we're going over to the hay slips.

2095
01:28:54,880 --> 01:28:55,830
And she was like,
um,

2096
01:28:56,050 --> 01:28:57,880
she was like 13.
And she goes,

2097
01:28:57,970 --> 01:29:00,400
ah,
this is the first I'm hearing of this.

2098
01:29:00,620 --> 01:29:00,921
I'm like,
well,

2099
01:29:00,921 --> 01:29:02,670
what you mean though?
You're my fucking kid.

2100
01:29:02,820 --> 01:29:04,650
I will meet you there.
She goes,

2101
01:29:04,651 --> 01:29:05,431
dad,
it's a school night.

2102
01:29:05,431 --> 01:29:06,600
It's an early night.
We should probably.

2103
01:29:06,601 --> 01:29:07,051
And I go,
no,

2104
01:29:07,051 --> 01:29:07,291
no,
no,

2105
01:29:07,291 --> 01:29:08,000
no,
no.

2106
01:29:08,000 --> 01:29:11,520
Like she just wants her distance.
She wants to be home like reading a book

2107
01:29:11,560 --> 01:29:14,400
or she wants her own personal 
sovereignty.

2108
01:29:14,430 --> 01:29:16,080
She wants to be able to control her own 
life.

2109
01:29:16,110 --> 01:29:16,943
Right?
Yeah.

2110
01:29:17,130 --> 01:29:19,170
But I was like,
there's got to be a dad's book out there

2111
01:29:19,171 --> 01:29:24,171
of like how you deal with your child not
wanting to be around you.

2112
01:29:25,470 --> 01:29:26,303
Like she asked me to can.
I used to do this thing where I dropped 

2113
01:29:27,830 --> 01:29:29,370
them off and then I just yell,
I love you.

2114
01:29:29,371 --> 01:29:30,690
Until they couldn't hear me anymore.

2115
01:29:30,960 --> 01:29:32,910
Like until they were far away.
Like I just go,

2116
01:29:32,911 --> 01:29:35,310
I love you and I love you.
I love you.

2117
01:29:35,390 --> 01:29:38,490
And like other kids be staring at him.
She said to me the other day,

2118
01:29:38,491 --> 01:29:38,881
she goes,
hey,

2119
01:29:38,881 --> 01:29:40,650
why do you do that?
I was like,

2120
01:29:41,070 --> 01:29:42,060
I don't know.
I don't know.

2121
01:29:42,061 --> 01:29:42,894
You don't like it.
She goes,

2122
01:29:42,930 --> 01:29:43,763
I,
there's kids that don't know me that 

2123
01:29:44,520 --> 01:29:47,820
don't know that it's a joke and like 
it'd be better if you didn't do that.

2124
01:29:48,090 --> 01:29:48,923
No.
I was like,

2125
01:29:49,260 --> 01:29:50,093
okay,
I've been doing this since she was a 

2126
01:29:50,731 --> 01:29:52,770
little girl and I was just like,
alright,

2127
01:29:52,910 --> 01:29:53,211
yeah,
yeah,

2128
01:29:53,211 --> 01:29:54,270
yeah,
yeah.

2129
01:29:54,271 --> 01:29:56,520
I can see how that was creepy and I was 
like,

2130
01:29:56,610 --> 01:29:58,470
fuck man.
Like I don't like,

2131
01:29:58,590 --> 01:30:03,590
you can't do that when they're 30 dad,
dad,

2132
01:30:05,520 --> 01:30:07,690
my kids are gonna wake up.
Yeah,

2133
01:30:08,130 --> 01:30:08,963
your dad loves you.
But there is this needy dude in me that 

2134
01:30:12,361 --> 01:30:14,250
I do feel like it's part of a breakup.

2135
01:30:14,250 --> 01:30:15,083
You know,
when you go into a breakup and you love 

2136
01:30:15,601 --> 01:30:17,790
someone they don't like,
I just need my space.

2137
01:30:17,880 --> 01:30:18,780
Oh yeah.
And you'd be like,

2138
01:30:19,200 --> 01:30:20,033
but hold on,
wait,

2139
01:30:20,140 --> 01:30:21,840
does this mean we don't go to the movies
anymore or something?

2140
01:30:21,900 --> 01:30:23,820
And you start panicking.
Oh yeah.

2141
01:30:23,821 --> 01:30:25,470
I started having that with my daughter 
and I said to my wife,

2142
01:30:25,471 --> 01:30:25,880
I go,
just,

2143
01:30:25,880 --> 01:30:26,713
you know,
like I'm not processing her 

2144
01:30:28,381 --> 01:30:29,161
independence.
Well,

2145
01:30:29,161 --> 01:30:32,280
like,
like I just part of me wants her to need

2146
01:30:32,281 --> 01:30:33,120
me,
you know,

2147
01:30:33,330 --> 01:30:35,460
of course.
And she doesn't know that she needs me.

2148
01:30:35,640 --> 01:30:36,473
She wants and totally healthy for her to
establish yourself as your own person 

2149
01:30:40,081 --> 01:30:42,030
and do own stuff.
But man,

2150
01:30:42,480 --> 01:30:43,313
I,
I all I can see is this just going to 

2151
01:30:44,251 --> 01:30:45,120
get harder?
Well,

2152
01:30:45,121 --> 01:30:45,954
there's one thing to take into 
consideration that you really can't fix 

2153
01:30:47,731 --> 01:30:48,930
and that's you're on the road a lot.

2154
01:30:49,110 --> 01:30:50,100
Yeah.
You know,

2155
01:30:50,101 --> 01:30:50,934
when kids are not around you all the 
time and then when you're there you're 

2156
01:30:52,531 --> 01:30:54,090
really overbearing.
It's like,

2157
01:30:54,091 --> 01:30:54,924
Hey,
I'm used to my own space and now you're 

2158
01:30:57,031 --> 01:31:00,150
fucking with me and you're yelling,
I love you at school and stop,

2159
01:31:00,780 --> 01:31:02,190
stop.
You're ruining my thing.

2160
01:31:02,340 --> 01:31:06,090
I'm working on my thing and you're 
stepping in and fucking it up.

2161
01:31:06,960 --> 01:31:08,100
Yeah.
And it's like,

2162
01:31:08,101 --> 01:31:08,940
uh,
you know,

2163
01:31:09,000 --> 01:31:09,781
I don't like,
you know,

2164
01:31:09,781 --> 01:31:10,614
think about,
I don't think about the product I put 

2165
01:31:11,431 --> 01:31:12,264
out.
I don't think that there's videos of me 

2166
01:31:13,621 --> 01:31:15,410
and speedos or,
you know,

2167
01:31:15,480 --> 01:31:16,313
I don't think of that stuff,
but I'm sure that there's kids in our 

2168
01:31:18,961 --> 01:31:22,740
school that have googled me and he said 
something or like,

2169
01:31:22,800 --> 01:31:23,633
I can't imagine what kind of footprint I
leave behind that she's got to sweep up 

2170
01:31:27,241 --> 01:31:28,074
and go.
And I never thought about that shit 

2171
01:31:30,000 --> 01:31:30,833
before,
but now I'm starting to realize it and 

2172
01:31:32,071 --> 01:31:32,730
I'm like,
oh.

2173
01:31:32,730 --> 01:31:33,720
Like I said,
in the end of the day,

2174
01:31:34,140 --> 01:31:35,370
Georgia goes,
I want to watch.

2175
01:31:35,371 --> 01:31:38,280
I'm own watch parts of the Caribbean 
five,

2176
01:31:38,281 --> 01:31:39,350
the last one,
the six,

2177
01:31:39,370 --> 01:31:40,860
whatever,
and I was like,

2178
01:31:41,070 --> 01:31:41,903
I don't want to watch that and we start 
fighting about it and I just want us to 

2179
01:31:43,501 --> 01:31:46,650
be together as a family stone sober 
obviously,

2180
01:31:46,920 --> 01:31:48,630
and I have a moment of fucking honestly.
I go,

2181
01:31:48,631 --> 01:31:50,040
hey,
I feel like I fucked things up.

2182
01:31:50,041 --> 01:31:51,510
So I was on the road for seven years.
Okay.

2183
01:31:51,660 --> 01:31:53,220
I feel like I should've never done 
travel channel.

2184
01:31:53,221 --> 01:31:55,680
I will always feel that way.
I will always feel that regret,

2185
01:31:55,980 --> 01:31:59,140
but these are the moments that I need in
my life where we can all be a family and

2186
01:31:59,141 --> 01:32:00,880
if you guys don't want to have,
because I was gone for so long,

2187
01:32:00,881 --> 01:32:02,230
I get it.
I get it.

2188
01:32:02,470 --> 01:32:03,303
But understand that if someone could 
just give an inch so that we can just 

2189
01:32:06,431 --> 01:32:08,590
hang out and watch this movie,
it would mean a lot to me.

2190
01:32:08,800 --> 01:32:10,270
Okay.
I'm going to store,

2191
01:32:10,271 --> 01:32:12,280
I'm going to get fish.
I'll be back in.

2192
01:32:12,281 --> 01:32:14,770
Georgia just pops up and she goes,
I'll go to the store with you.

2193
01:32:14,860 --> 01:32:16,290
And I was like.
I was like,

2194
01:32:16,330 --> 01:32:17,230
oh.
And then I was like,

2195
01:32:17,560 --> 01:32:19,120
well no,
I want to go to the store.

2196
01:32:20,910 --> 01:32:22,990
So we go to the store together and we 
didn't handle it though.

2197
01:32:22,991 --> 01:32:24,070
That's what I mean.
Look,

2198
01:32:24,071 --> 01:32:25,550
you can't fix the past,
right?

2199
01:32:25,570 --> 01:32:30,570
Kevin can acknowledge that maybe it 
wasn't ideal and that's a great thing,

2200
01:32:30,641 --> 01:32:31,474
man,
to have that kind of honesty because 

2201
01:32:32,410 --> 01:32:34,690
that's a great lesson to your kid that 
you know,

2202
01:32:34,691 --> 01:32:37,480
like if you have made mistakes,
don't pretend you haven't,

2203
01:32:37,780 --> 01:32:40,060
don't gloss over it.
Just talk about it.

2204
01:32:40,090 --> 01:32:41,620
Like talk about your feelings.
Honestly.

2205
01:32:41,621 --> 01:32:42,454
I mean I think a lot of us were 
frustrated by the way we were raised in 

2206
01:32:44,231 --> 01:32:45,064
that regard that your parents never 
anybody ever saying they did anything 

2207
01:32:48,251 --> 01:32:49,084
wrong,
ever,

2208
01:32:49,450 --> 01:32:51,490
ever know.
It was never.

2209
01:32:51,491 --> 01:32:54,220
My Dad never once said,
I'm sorry they didn't say that,

2210
01:32:54,490 --> 01:32:57,460
didn't nobody said that back then kids 
shut the fuck up and go outside.

2211
01:32:57,770 --> 01:32:59,080
Yeah,
that's what you heard.

2212
01:32:59,140 --> 01:33:01,240
Like nobody taught you anything.
You just,

2213
01:33:01,340 --> 01:33:03,400
you know,
it's just like what you did.

2214
01:33:03,430 --> 01:33:05,800
Parents went to school,
our parents went to work rather.

2215
01:33:05,830 --> 01:33:06,663
And you went to school and then when you
got home from school there was nobody 

2216
01:33:08,381 --> 01:33:09,700
there.
You had a key.

2217
01:33:10,050 --> 01:33:13,390
You let yourself in the house and you 
fucking figured it out.

2218
01:33:13,391 --> 01:33:16,800
Stupid doubts.
I mean there's none of that too.

2219
01:33:16,810 --> 01:33:18,070
Daddy.
How to make one meal.

2220
01:33:18,071 --> 01:33:20,140
And that's what you ate all the time.
So that's what you made yourself.

2221
01:33:20,170 --> 01:33:21,003
Mine was a frog in a hole where you put 
the hole in the bread and put an egg in 

2222
01:33:24,251 --> 01:33:26,410
the middle of the bread and then you 
flip it.

2223
01:33:26,530 --> 01:33:27,670
You ever had that?
No.

2224
01:33:27,940 --> 01:33:28,840
He ever had that.
Jamie.

2225
01:33:29,240 --> 01:33:30,820
You don't call it that though.
What do you call it?

2226
01:33:30,850 --> 01:33:33,940
A I have something or other.
I forget.

2227
01:33:33,950 --> 01:33:34,781
Yeah,
it's really great.

2228
01:33:34,781 --> 01:33:35,614
It's the only thing I knew how to make 
you just take a cup and you cut the 

2229
01:33:37,871 --> 01:33:38,704
center out of bread and then you crack 
an egg and you do an egg inside that 

2230
01:33:41,171 --> 01:33:44,050
center and you let it grill and then you
flip it over.

2231
01:33:44,080 --> 01:33:45,010
Those.
The only thing I knew how to make.

2232
01:33:45,011 --> 01:33:47,050
I must have eaten the hundreds of those,
Huh?

2233
01:33:48,220 --> 01:33:50,740
Yeah.
We used to have to cook like one night a

2234
01:33:50,741 --> 01:33:51,490
week.

2235
01:33:51,490 --> 01:33:52,680
We'd have to cook.
Really?

2236
01:33:52,690 --> 01:33:55,660
The whole family knows in highschool.
Yeah,

2237
01:33:56,010 --> 01:33:56,950
it's.
I learned how to cook.

2238
01:33:57,190 --> 01:34:00,000
Can I tell you,
and I don't know if there's a sponsor,

2239
01:34:00,010 --> 01:34:00,843
your podcast,
but can I tell you one of the things 

2240
01:34:02,321 --> 01:34:04,330
that keeps my family together is fucking
blue apron.

2241
01:34:04,900 --> 01:34:05,960
I swear to God.
Yeah.

2242
01:34:05,970 --> 01:34:08,770
They're a sponsor.
The fact that the fact that they come in

2243
01:34:09,220 --> 01:34:10,053
and my kids will eat something different
and we cook a meal for four and my 

2244
01:34:14,441 --> 01:34:15,820
daughters will be like,
what is it tonight?

2245
01:34:15,821 --> 01:34:16,654
What's the Blue Apron?
And we have dinner at least twice a 

2246
01:34:19,210 --> 01:34:20,500
week.
We get two meals from them a week,

2247
01:34:20,770 --> 01:34:22,660
at least twice a week.
We do a blue apron.

2248
01:34:22,750 --> 01:34:23,220
Well,
the good

2249
01:34:23,220 --> 01:34:24,053
thing about it is how easy it is and 
there's no waste because everything is 

2250
01:34:26,580 --> 01:34:30,810
pre portioned and the step by step 
photographic instructions makes it super

2251
01:34:30,811 --> 01:34:32,010
easy.
It's a great,

2252
01:34:32,070 --> 01:34:32,903
great service.

2253
01:34:32,950 --> 01:34:34,150
It really is.
They started selling wine,

2254
01:34:34,210 --> 01:34:37,000
sort of southern wine out this fucking 
this month.

2255
01:34:37,580 --> 01:34:39,580
That's just this month he started 
signing for me.

2256
01:34:39,581 --> 01:34:42,010
They just started sending me one.
It's nice,

2257
01:34:42,011 --> 01:34:43,450
isn't it?
I really do.

2258
01:34:43,480 --> 01:34:45,520
Like I was.
I was.

2259
01:34:45,521 --> 01:34:49,270
I did six months sober when I first 
started dating a leanne.

2260
01:34:49,550 --> 01:34:50,383
Yeah.
You told me that we just wanted to be 

2261
01:34:51,701 --> 01:34:52,534
sober.
I wanted to be sober in the first night 

2262
01:34:53,651 --> 01:34:56,620
I drank was in Venice,
Italy.

2263
01:34:56,710 --> 01:34:58,650
Venice,
Italy were there,

2264
01:34:59,270 --> 01:35:01,190
restaurant,
tiny restaurant.

2265
01:35:01,640 --> 01:35:03,680
We were walking to the restaurant and 
start snowing.

2266
01:35:04,380 --> 01:35:07,010
It snowed two days after,
uh,

2267
01:35:07,011 --> 01:35:10,250
after New Year's Eve starts snowing and 
I'm like,

2268
01:35:10,340 --> 01:35:11,540
oh,
this is fucking great.

2269
01:35:11,840 --> 01:35:14,360
So we go to dinner and now it's dumping.
You see it out.

2270
01:35:14,361 --> 01:35:17,870
The window is dumping and Leanne's like,
let's just get lost tonight.

2271
01:35:17,900 --> 01:35:18,830
And I'm like,
Oh yeah.

2272
01:35:19,040 --> 01:35:19,873
And I go,
I need,

2273
01:35:19,910 --> 01:35:21,500
I want to drink,
I want a cocktail,

2274
01:35:21,530 --> 01:35:23,780
I want a glass of wine.
I want to enjoy this.

2275
01:35:24,140 --> 01:35:24,921
And I said to her,
I go,

2276
01:35:24,921 --> 01:35:26,180
I really want a glass of wine.
She goes,

2277
01:35:26,190 --> 01:35:27,920
have one who gives a fuck,
have one.

2278
01:35:28,400 --> 01:35:29,233
So I have a glass of wine,
have a couple glasses of wine and we go 

2279
01:35:30,471 --> 01:35:31,304
out and we get lost in the streets of 
Venice and we're just hopping in Barda 

2280
01:35:33,800 --> 01:35:34,633
bar,
having a glass of wine and then walking 

2281
01:35:35,541 --> 01:35:38,690
around one of the best nights of my 
fucking life.

2282
01:35:38,960 --> 01:35:39,860
And I was like,
thank you.

2283
01:35:39,861 --> 01:35:40,694
Alcohol.

2284
01:35:42,280 --> 01:35:46,630
Well isn't it different though in Italy?
Italy's really nice in that regard.

2285
01:35:46,631 --> 01:35:47,464
Like this.
There's just a more relaxed atmosphere 

2286
01:35:50,410 --> 01:35:52,840
like at restaurants,
places that you go,

2287
01:35:52,841 --> 01:35:54,630
it's like a different feel,
you know,

2288
01:35:54,700 --> 01:35:55,840
there's,
we,

2289
01:35:55,900 --> 01:35:59,020
we are making a mistake with the way we 
live our lives,

2290
01:35:59,170 --> 01:36:00,003
you know,
I think that the pressure that to 

2291
01:36:02,021 --> 01:36:02,854
succeed,
the hustle and bustle that people have 

2292
01:36:04,870 --> 01:36:05,703
is not counterbalanced in this country 
by relaxation and enjoyment and like 

2293
01:36:09,731 --> 01:36:14,731
family time and like a nice long meal 
and appreciating the rest.

2294
01:36:15,340 --> 01:36:16,173
We don't appreciate the rest.
We appreciate a person who sleeps three 

2295
01:36:17,981 --> 01:36:20,920
hours a night and fucking just hustling 
all day long.

2296
01:36:20,921 --> 01:36:22,120
Constantly hustling,
hustling.

2297
01:36:23,290 --> 01:36:25,930
There's something to hard work and 
hustle.

2298
01:36:25,990 --> 01:36:28,270
But man,
I think it should be counterbalanced and

2299
01:36:28,271 --> 01:36:31,450
I always feel that when I go to Italy,
I mean we've gone to Italy,

2300
01:36:31,451 --> 01:36:34,600
uh,
my family two summers in a row and every

2301
01:36:34,601 --> 01:36:35,434
time we go there it's just delicious 
food and relaxation and you're at the 

2302
01:36:39,310 --> 01:36:40,143
beach and sitting at the water and just 
having a couple of drinks and kicking 

2303
01:36:44,141 --> 01:36:44,470
back.

2304
01:36:44,470 --> 01:36:45,303
And it's like my whole being just,
just feel likes all the bullshit just 

2305
01:36:50,861 --> 01:36:51,694
goes away.
Like I don't pay attention to the 

2306
01:36:52,720 --> 01:36:55,390
fucking news.
I don't pay attention to shit.

2307
01:36:55,630 --> 01:36:57,160
I tell my manager,
my agent,

2308
01:36:57,161 --> 01:36:58,840
you can't get ahold of me.
I'm gone.

2309
01:36:59,140 --> 01:37:01,060
I'm gone for seven,
eight days,

2310
01:37:01,061 --> 01:37:02,560
whatever it is,
just leave me alone.

2311
01:37:02,561 --> 01:37:03,394
Whatever it is,
put the fire out and I'm just going to 

2312
01:37:05,351 --> 01:37:08,890
be eating pasta and just go to these 
churches.

2313
01:37:08,980 --> 01:37:12,970
Check out these beautiful places.
We went to the colosseum one year,

2314
01:37:12,971 --> 01:37:17,530
the next year we went to some beautiful 
church in Ravello and you'd just see all

2315
01:37:17,531 --> 01:37:18,364
these amazing places where you're just 
seeing places that are a thousand plus 

2316
01:37:22,121 --> 01:37:25,090
years old and fluid that's just fucking 
incredible.

2317
01:37:25,091 --> 01:37:25,924
You're eating sardines that are fresh 
right out of the water and pasta with 

2318
01:37:29,561 --> 01:37:32,920
Squid and oh,
and the wine and it's just.

2319
01:37:33,250 --> 01:37:34,083
And you're just not thinking about 
anything but just laughing and relaxing 

2320
01:37:37,061 --> 01:37:38,620
and I think that's.

2321
01:37:38,830 --> 01:37:41,230
Look,
I'm a as Gogo go as anybody,

2322
01:37:41,231 --> 01:37:45,220
but I'm learning as I get older that you
got to also have.

2323
01:37:45,530 --> 01:37:47,530
You got to balance that out and you 
can't.

2324
01:37:47,531 --> 01:37:48,364
Like,
you can't have that other shit on 

2325
01:37:50,831 --> 01:37:53,260
reserve while you're.
While you're relaxing,

2326
01:37:53,470 --> 01:37:54,303
you can't be checking your phone,
checking your twitter and checking your 

2327
01:37:56,371 --> 01:37:59,640
email constantly.
We've got a slide that bitch aside.

2328
01:37:59,641 --> 01:38:01,320
You've got to leave it in the room and 
the safe.

2329
01:38:01,321 --> 01:38:02,154
You got to do something.
You gotta you gotta just not pay 

2330
01:38:03,781 --> 01:38:04,614
attention.
You got to just somehow or another 

2331
01:38:06,181 --> 01:38:07,014
figure out a way to let go and it's 
taken me a while to learn how to do 

2332
01:38:09,511 --> 01:38:10,344
that.
Man.

2333
01:38:10,470 --> 01:38:12,600
I was always like,
if you're not moving forward,

2334
01:38:12,601 --> 01:38:14,010
you're falling behind.
You know,

2335
01:38:14,011 --> 01:38:16,110
that's,
that's always been my thought process.

2336
01:38:16,111 --> 01:38:19,860
I have this fucked up.
I'm like aggressive,

2337
01:38:19,861 --> 01:38:22,080
competitive thought process.
Do more than the next guy.

2338
01:38:22,080 --> 01:38:24,570
That's how you get ahead.
But that's not always the case,

2339
01:38:24,571 --> 01:38:25,404
especially in our business,
which is so dependent upon creativity 

2340
01:38:28,650 --> 01:38:32,010
and the mind.
And I think your mind like you want to,

2341
01:38:32,011 --> 01:38:34,200
you want your mind to be in a good 
place.

2342
01:38:34,260 --> 01:38:37,200
You know,
I think like if you're in it,

2343
01:38:37,320 --> 01:38:38,153
my mind is always in the best place when
I have good relationships with my 

2344
01:38:40,351 --> 01:38:41,280
friends,
my family,

2345
01:38:41,460 --> 01:38:42,840
that's where my mind is in the best 
place.

2346
01:38:43,170 --> 01:38:44,003
That's the most important shit that 
cultivate that as the most important 

2347
01:38:46,171 --> 01:38:47,004
thing.
But a lot of times we think the most 

2348
01:38:47,791 --> 01:38:49,610
important thing is like financial 
success.

2349
01:38:49,660 --> 01:38:51,210
The most important thing is this or 
that.

2350
01:38:51,450 --> 01:38:53,820
These things get that in order,
you know,

2351
01:38:53,821 --> 01:38:54,654
uh,
we're gonna get a new house so we're 

2352
01:38:55,771 --> 01:38:58,200
going to get a new thing or this and 
that.

2353
01:38:58,201 --> 01:39:01,650
But that's how bullshit like those 
things aren't bad to,

2354
01:39:01,860 --> 01:39:03,930
to have or to as a goal.

2355
01:39:04,170 --> 01:39:08,050
But clearly your base has got to be.
I mean,

2356
01:39:08,350 --> 01:39:11,100
I hate to sound Corny,
but it's got to be things matters of the

2357
01:39:11,101 --> 01:39:11,934
heart.
It's got to be friends and loved ones 

2358
01:39:13,951 --> 01:39:14,784
and family.
It's got to be your children and your 

2359
01:39:16,471 --> 01:39:18,390
wife.
And your mom and your,

2360
01:39:18,840 --> 01:39:19,673
your the people that you care about like
yet those people like have good times 

2361
01:39:23,401 --> 01:39:26,040
with those people like happiness,
like that.

2362
01:39:26,041 --> 01:39:28,530
You have to have that.
If you do not have that,

2363
01:39:28,531 --> 01:39:29,364
all that other stuff is bullshit.
If you don't have friends that love you 

2364
01:39:31,951 --> 01:39:32,784
and you love them and you like 
legitimately happy to see them and you 

2365
01:39:35,431 --> 01:39:36,264
have laughed together and fun together,
then all the money in the world won't 

2366
01:39:39,571 --> 01:39:42,690
mean anything to you.
It will be zero.

2367
01:39:43,190 --> 01:39:48,190
You will have a zero happiness register.
You will register zero pleasure for many

2368
01:39:49,801 --> 01:39:54,801
financial success if you know you and 
your best friends hate each other.

2369
01:39:55,230 --> 01:39:57,360
You know what I mean?
It's just you can't have that.

2370
01:39:57,390 --> 01:39:59,090
That's not,
that's not what light,

2371
01:39:59,230 --> 01:40:00,063
you know,
and a lot of selfish people lose track 

2372
01:40:02,101 --> 01:40:02,934
of that.
They don't understand how important the 

2373
01:40:04,591 --> 01:40:06,940
tribe is,
how important community is.

2374
01:40:07,050 --> 01:40:09,150
I didn't,
I didn't at all.

2375
01:40:09,240 --> 01:40:11,640
I didn't understand that at all up until
this month.

2376
01:40:12,190 --> 01:40:13,210
This month.
Yeah,

2377
01:40:13,380 --> 01:40:13,951
I was,
man.

2378
01:40:13,951 --> 01:40:18,951
I have been at a full fucking pace,
at a full clip this entire year.

2379
01:40:20,340 --> 01:40:23,100
Starting from when we did that weight 
loss challenge too,

2380
01:40:23,430 --> 01:40:26,310
when you guys that,
that Australian tour,

2381
01:40:27,000 --> 01:40:29,630
I've been at a full fucking pace and I 
had this out.

2382
01:40:29,640 --> 01:40:30,473
A couple of realizations.
One of them was if I don't talk to Joey 

2383
01:40:33,780 --> 01:40:36,420
Diaz in like a month,
then I'm working too hard.

2384
01:40:36,790 --> 01:40:38,070
Like.
Because Joey is someone that.

2385
01:40:38,300 --> 01:40:41,400
Yeah and I.
and Joe is Joe.

2386
01:40:41,430 --> 01:40:42,263
I think Christina Christina said the 
same thing to me when I did their 

2387
01:40:44,881 --> 01:40:46,920
podcast.
So if you're working too much,

2388
01:40:46,921 --> 01:40:47,754
I'm working every fucking week.
I feel like I'm very blessed to be in 

2389
01:40:50,131 --> 01:40:51,990
this situation that people want to see 
me do comedy,

2390
01:40:51,991 --> 01:40:52,824
so I'm like fuck,
I'm in there every week and joey was 

2391
01:40:55,301 --> 01:40:55,721
like,
dog,

2392
01:40:55,721 --> 01:40:57,040
I do two weeks a month.
That's it.

2393
01:40:57,160 --> 01:40:57,993
If I can't spend time with my family and
do my blog and podcast and who gives a 

2394
01:41:00,281 --> 01:41:01,114
fuck?
Who hears I'm fuck.

2395
01:41:01,470 --> 01:41:03,310
Just fucking lights up.
Yeah.

2396
01:41:03,640 --> 01:41:04,211
And I was like,
yeah,

2397
01:41:04,211 --> 01:41:05,980
I'm working too hard.
I'm working way too hard.

2398
01:41:06,370 --> 01:41:07,450
Yeah.
That's my schedule.

2399
01:41:07,960 --> 01:41:10,900
My schedule is two weeks a month.
I've been saying that forever.

2400
01:41:10,960 --> 01:41:13,690
That's all I want to do.
Two weekends a month.

2401
01:41:13,950 --> 01:41:14,711
You know,
people say,

2402
01:41:14,711 --> 01:41:15,700
Oh,
you're going on tour.

2403
01:41:15,701 --> 01:41:17,500
When do you leave?
Like when do I leave?

2404
01:41:17,560 --> 01:41:18,970
I leave Thursday.
I'm back on Monday.

2405
01:41:19,350 --> 01:41:21,820
Like when you're talking about I don't 
go for very long.

2406
01:41:22,120 --> 01:41:24,490
I usually leave Friday morning and I'm 
back on Sunday.

2407
01:41:24,780 --> 01:41:26,470
Like I'm not.
This is not,

2408
01:41:26,740 --> 01:41:27,573
I'm not touring.
I'm not going to go somewhere for 30 

2409
01:41:29,411 --> 01:41:30,140
days.
Fuck

2410
01:41:30,140 --> 01:41:31,160
that.
I can't do that.

2411
01:41:31,270 --> 01:41:32,720
Oh,
I'm doing that.

2412
01:41:32,960 --> 01:41:35,270
I am doing that coming up.
But are you going to do.

2413
01:41:35,290 --> 01:41:39,580
I'm doing two tours this year.
One's like a legit one.

2414
01:41:39,650 --> 01:41:43,420
The first ones I think starting in June,
it's the call in sick to work tour and I

2415
01:41:43,430 --> 01:41:44,570
think I'm going to do it with two other 
comics.

2416
01:41:44,571 --> 01:41:47,810
We had a tour bus and we're going to do 
some venues.

2417
01:41:48,170 --> 01:41:49,670
Did you organize it already?
Uh,

2418
01:41:49,720 --> 01:41:51,760
I'm on the process.
We're in the process world.

2419
01:41:51,900 --> 01:41:54,210
Why?
If you've already decided that two weeks

2420
01:41:54,211 --> 01:41:55,290
a month is better?

2421
01:41:55,730 --> 01:41:57,430
Um,
because,

2422
01:41:58,010 --> 01:41:58,843
because I don't do what you guys do.
So you and Tom tour very differently 

2423
01:42:01,821 --> 01:42:05,040
than I do because you guys are doing 
theaters so you can add shows and it's,

2424
01:42:05,060 --> 01:42:09,140
it's a big deal and you're getting a lot
more bang for your buck.

2425
01:42:09,141 --> 01:42:11,570
I think when you do a theater.
I'm still doing clubs.

2426
01:42:11,930 --> 01:42:14,760
I think the money's probably in the 
money's d.

2427
01:42:14,990 --> 01:42:15,823
you're getting a higher percentage but 
you gotta be there fucking Wednesday 

2428
01:42:18,141 --> 01:42:19,160
night,
Thursday,

2429
01:42:19,161 --> 01:42:20,060
Friday,
Saturday,

2430
01:42:20,061 --> 01:42:20,894
Sunday,
fly home Monday and those just add up 

2431
01:42:23,631 --> 01:42:26,720
into like fucking because you have to do
that.

2432
01:42:26,870 --> 01:42:28,370
You don't have to do that.
I don't know.

2433
01:42:28,430 --> 01:42:29,750
I never did that.
I know.

2434
01:42:29,751 --> 01:42:32,290
But you stopped doing Wednesdays in the 
nineties?

2435
01:42:32,320 --> 01:42:32,841
No,
Wednesday.

2436
01:42:32,841 --> 01:42:34,380
I fly in Wednesday to do press on 
Thursday.

2437
01:42:34,590 --> 01:42:35,423
Stop doing that.
But I feel grateful for those places 

2438
01:42:37,731 --> 01:42:38,564
that had me in when I wasn't selling 
tickets and so I know what you're 

2439
01:42:40,371 --> 01:42:40,640
saying.

2440
01:42:40,640 --> 01:42:45,080
DC wide sold out a month ahead of time,
but I go can elliot's my buddy he's been

2441
01:42:45,081 --> 01:42:45,914
supporting my whole career.
I will be there for Thursday morning 

2442
01:42:47,921 --> 01:42:49,670
pressed with him.
That's very nice of you.

2443
01:42:49,880 --> 01:42:51,560
That's very nice of you.
But it's bad for your health.

2444
01:42:52,250 --> 01:42:53,083
Very bad for your health,
what you call in call in when you're on 

2445
01:42:55,311 --> 01:42:56,650
the road,
but what I'd like to do is like,

2446
01:42:56,690 --> 01:42:59,480
I would like to do,
go ahead and get some of my friends,

2447
01:42:59,481 --> 01:43:03,410
get on a tour bus and not kill myself 
with the travel and do you know,

2448
01:43:03,411 --> 01:43:08,210
like straight out 14 dates or 10 dates,
do the tour,

2449
01:43:08,211 --> 01:43:10,130
make some money and then go and be at 
the store and.

2450
01:43:10,240 --> 01:43:12,260
Right.
And because that's what you guys do.

2451
01:43:12,261 --> 01:43:15,140
And I,
I never do the straight tours.

2452
01:43:15,300 --> 01:43:16,133
You have the straight tour.

2453
01:43:16,340 --> 01:43:18,440
I don't think they're healthy.
I don't like them.

2454
01:43:18,441 --> 01:43:20,150
They wear you out,
you're always tired.

2455
01:43:20,240 --> 01:43:22,850
You wake up in the morning like fuck,
you've got to get to the gym,

2456
01:43:22,851 --> 01:43:23,930
get to the gym,
get something to eat.

2457
01:43:23,931 --> 01:43:26,240
How many more hours before the show?
Two hours.

2458
01:43:26,241 --> 01:43:29,000
I'm gonna try to take a nap and you 
always wind up being worn out.

2459
01:43:29,480 --> 01:43:32,630
And that's the thing that I don't feel 
happy.

2460
01:43:33,050 --> 01:43:36,110
Like I feel happy when I'm home more,
you know,

2461
01:43:36,290 --> 01:43:38,090
like uh,
it just,

2462
01:43:38,450 --> 01:43:41,120
I don't like I can't go 30 days.

2463
01:43:41,300 --> 01:43:43,940
I can't do 30 days.
It was most I can do is I only,

2464
01:43:43,950 --> 01:43:44,783
this is because of the travel channel,
but I can do two weeks in two weeks and 

2465
01:43:47,361 --> 01:43:48,890
at the end of two weeks I'm like,
get me the fuck home.

2466
01:43:49,010 --> 01:43:52,550
A few years ago I switched just Fridays 
and Saturdays,

2467
01:43:52,620 --> 01:43:53,453
it was actually quite a while ago,
maybe maybe going on a eight or nine 

2468
01:43:56,751 --> 01:43:58,610
years ago,
but it was one of the best things I ever

2469
01:43:58,611 --> 01:43:59,580
did because,
uh,

2470
01:43:59,740 --> 01:44:00,573
I don't like,
I would think about like doing Thursday 

2471
01:44:03,351 --> 01:44:04,610
and Sunday and I'm like,
oh.

2472
01:44:05,490 --> 01:44:08,990
Then you just feel like it's just taken 
up too much time.

2473
01:44:09,020 --> 01:44:09,853
I would rather do Friday and Saturday on
the road and then come back home and if 

2474
01:44:12,621 --> 01:44:13,454
I want to do a set Sunday,
I'll do a fucking set at the store or 

2475
01:44:15,041 --> 01:44:17,720
the Improv or something like that.
Just driving a town,

2476
01:44:17,750 --> 01:44:19,310
have a good time.
I get home.

2477
01:44:19,700 --> 01:44:22,940
I just think there's a balance that you 
have to have.

2478
01:44:22,990 --> 01:44:27,890
Like we've all seen those guys that are 
older and really burnt out,

2479
01:44:28,370 --> 01:44:29,071
you know,
and they,

2480
01:44:29,071 --> 01:44:31,160
they just don't have any energy left for
it anymore.

2481
01:44:31,161 --> 01:44:34,190
And they feel like it's a burden instead
of a pleasure.

2482
01:44:34,670 --> 01:44:36,710
Like when I go on the road now it's a 
pleasure,

2483
01:44:36,860 --> 01:44:37,693
you know,
like I've taken most of them this month 

2484
01:44:40,011 --> 01:44:41,390
off.
I did,

2485
01:44:41,391 --> 01:44:44,750
um,
the sixth at the Mirage in Vegas.

2486
01:44:44,810 --> 01:44:48,050
I'm doing all the rest of the shows I do
in Hollywood.

2487
01:44:48,051 --> 01:44:50,930
I'm doing a shitload of shows.
I did two last night.

2488
01:44:50,931 --> 01:44:54,590
I did Largo and then I did the store the
night before I did the Improv,

2489
01:44:54,591 --> 01:44:57,290
then I did two sets at the store.
So I'm doing a lot of comedy,

2490
01:44:57,650 --> 01:44:58,850
but I'm home,
you know,

2491
01:44:58,970 --> 01:44:59,840
and I'm doing this.

2492
01:45:00,020 --> 01:45:02,300
Being home has been really enjoyable.
I go to,

2493
01:45:02,301 --> 01:45:04,050
I go to Chicago in a week and I'm,
I'm,

2494
01:45:04,460 --> 01:45:06,320
I'm excited because I'm going to be 
flying.

2495
01:45:06,321 --> 01:45:07,154
So I'm excited for that.
I'm excited to do a week sober and see 

2496
01:45:09,830 --> 01:45:12,550
like do some hot yoga and Chicago 
online.

2497
01:45:12,860 --> 01:45:14,990
Like I'm excited for Chicago.
But then.

2498
01:45:15,680 --> 01:45:17,210
But then I go like,
uh,

2499
01:45:17,270 --> 01:45:19,730
like in November it starts up hard 
again.

2500
01:45:19,731 --> 01:45:20,930
And I'm like,
like,

2501
01:45:20,931 --> 01:45:22,870
I can't cancel because I've already 
committed to these days.

2502
01:45:22,871 --> 01:45:25,160
I canceled Austin and everyone lost her 
shit.

2503
01:45:25,190 --> 01:45:26,530
How'd you cancel it?
Why'd you cancel?

2504
01:45:26,560 --> 01:45:27,393
So we were doing this month and I didn't
show up in my calendar and then it did 

2505
01:45:29,631 --> 01:45:30,570
one day I was like,
ah,

2506
01:45:30,650 --> 01:45:31,483
no I can't,
you can't get it because of the sober 

2507
01:45:33,591 --> 01:45:34,424
Mike.
I canceled because I was coming off of 

2508
01:45:35,391 --> 01:45:39,500
Australia DC and then I would have 
gotten six days off then gone right back

2509
01:45:39,501 --> 01:45:39,800
on the road.

2510
01:45:39,800 --> 01:45:40,460
And I'm like,
no man,

2511
01:45:40,460 --> 01:45:44,390
this is about getting healthy and being 
like getting my mind back about me.

2512
01:45:44,930 --> 01:45:46,460
And so by the way,
if you got,

2513
01:45:46,490 --> 01:45:49,460
if you need to refund your money,
just call the box office at Austin,

2514
01:45:49,461 --> 01:45:50,530
they'll refund your money.
Ham.

2515
01:45:50,540 --> 01:45:51,770
Dude,
it was serious.

2516
01:45:51,771 --> 01:45:53,330
That's a serious choice,
right?

2517
01:45:53,480 --> 01:45:54,260
Yeah,
I will.

2518
01:45:54,260 --> 01:45:55,220
I,
I'm,

2519
01:45:55,680 --> 01:45:56,513
I mean I talked to Tom Almost everyday 
and I talked to him about a lot about 

2520
01:45:59,181 --> 01:46:00,014
this business and uh,
like I'm at the place where they're 

2521
01:46:03,051 --> 01:46:03,884
adding to Sunday shows,
an extra Friday show and extra Saturday 

2522
01:46:06,921 --> 01:46:07,754
show,
another Thursday show and he's always 

2523
01:46:10,400 --> 01:46:12,950
used theaters.
She doing all that.

2524
01:46:12,980 --> 01:46:13,813
If you have all those shows.
I'm doing a theater to theater tours 

2525
01:46:16,520 --> 01:46:17,660
next year.
Next year.

2526
01:46:17,720 --> 01:46:19,430
Yeah.
I didn't like the money offer.

2527
01:46:19,700 --> 01:46:20,360
Oh,
I see.

2528
01:46:20,360 --> 01:46:22,340
I the money offered for me.
Do you have a good manager?

2529
01:46:23,580 --> 01:46:24,350
Will Talk.
Um,

2530
01:46:24,350 --> 01:46:25,590
yeah,
the uh,

2531
01:46:25,690 --> 01:46:27,860
I love.
I just left a meeting with her.

2532
01:46:27,861 --> 01:46:28,694
Yeah,
she's great.

2533
01:46:28,700 --> 01:46:29,533
But the problem,
I didn't like the theater tour offers 

2534
01:46:33,891 --> 01:46:36,440
this year and it was mean.
I'll be very candid.

2535
01:46:36,441 --> 01:46:38,270
It was a,
the money was just shit.

2536
01:46:38,570 --> 01:46:39,680
Right?
And I was like,

2537
01:46:39,681 --> 01:46:41,270
well this is the one year I can make 
money.

2538
01:46:41,271 --> 01:46:44,420
I can make,
I can make x amount of dollars,

2539
01:46:44,900 --> 01:46:46,070
uh,
at a,

2540
01:46:46,071 --> 01:46:49,950
at a club by doing,
by getting 90 percent of the door and do

2541
01:46:49,951 --> 01:46:50,310
an

2542
01:46:50,310 --> 01:46:51,700
sales sell $30.
So you get a,

2543
01:46:51,701 --> 01:46:53,180
you can get some real money.
Yeah.

2544
01:46:53,430 --> 01:46:55,530
Or I can do theaters and it's about 
prestige.

2545
01:46:55,531 --> 01:46:56,970
For me it would be about,
oh,

2546
01:46:56,971 --> 01:47:00,090
I do theaters as opposed to 10.
Never met Jack Shit to me.

2547
01:47:00,210 --> 01:47:02,550
But it does for some comics.
I think it's stupid.

2548
01:47:02,740 --> 01:47:05,970
It's ridiculous.
I literally had an agent tell me,

2549
01:47:06,000 --> 01:47:06,833
now that you've,
you're doing theater so you can't go 

2550
01:47:07,981 --> 01:47:09,760
back to clubs.
It's like years ago when I first started

2551
01:47:10,040 --> 01:47:11,640
particularly like,
what are you talking about?

2552
01:47:11,641 --> 01:47:12,474
Stupid.
I have to do clubs like I do the 

2553
01:47:14,011 --> 01:47:15,540
laughing skull in Atlanta.
By the way.

2554
01:47:15,541 --> 01:47:17,550
Ian Edwards there this weekend.
Go see Ian Edwards,

2555
01:47:17,551 --> 01:47:20,760
one of the best comics life.
It's only like 90 seats.

2556
01:47:21,330 --> 01:47:22,740
Less than that.
I think it's 88 does it?

2557
01:47:23,700 --> 01:47:25,890
I know that because I stopped doing.
I couldn't make my money.

2558
01:47:25,950 --> 01:47:28,650
I did that two years ago or maybe year 
and a half ago.

2559
01:47:28,680 --> 01:47:31,500
I do everything.
I do little places.

2560
01:47:31,590 --> 01:47:34,680
I do the comedy works in Denver still.
Oh yeah,

2561
01:47:34,681 --> 01:47:36,720
I do those.
I think you got to do those.

2562
01:47:36,721 --> 01:47:38,650
I think you got to do the little spots,
man.

2563
01:47:39,600 --> 01:47:42,010
House constantly.
I did wise guys in Utah.

2564
01:47:42,030 --> 01:47:43,320
I know you did that.
I remember that.

2565
01:47:43,321 --> 01:47:44,154
I remember at the time I was there when 
they put those tickets on sale and I 

2566
01:47:46,261 --> 01:47:48,240
think Keith came in and was sold out 
already.

2567
01:47:48,560 --> 01:47:49,260
I was like,
what?

2568
01:47:49,260 --> 01:47:53,670
He's like your buddy Joe Rogan just sold
out already already walked away.

2569
01:47:53,671 --> 01:47:54,600
I was like,
wow.

2570
01:47:55,290 --> 01:47:58,740
I think it's like working out.
I think you have to have weight lifting,

2571
01:47:58,741 --> 01:48:00,900
but you also have to have yoga,
you have to have running,

2572
01:48:01,170 --> 01:48:02,003
but you also should do something else.
Like I think you got to have a balanced 

2573
01:48:04,650 --> 01:48:08,790
approach to stand up and one of the 
things is like intimate rooms,

2574
01:48:08,910 --> 01:48:11,610
like being right in front of people you 
know,

2575
01:48:11,611 --> 01:48:14,550
and then also not sometimes being in a 
big ass place.

2576
01:48:14,580 --> 01:48:16,350
Like I'm doing the Belko theater in 
Denver.

2577
01:48:16,351 --> 01:48:17,670
That's like 6,000
people.

2578
01:48:18,120 --> 01:48:20,130
That's the kind of place that you,
you know,

2579
01:48:20,131 --> 01:48:22,380
you have the big show.
It's like you're,

2580
01:48:22,381 --> 01:48:24,450
it's not intimate,
but you,

2581
01:48:24,451 --> 01:48:25,284
you're,
you're act gets honed and all these 

2582
01:48:26,761 --> 01:48:29,310
other places too.
This razor sharp edge.

2583
01:48:29,520 --> 01:48:32,880
And then you go to that place just 
fucking send it home.

2584
01:48:34,080 --> 01:48:36,600
And the,
the roars of like 6,000

2585
01:48:36,601 --> 01:48:37,470
people.
It's crazy.

2586
01:48:37,590 --> 01:48:40,890
It's nice to go into a big theater and 
go like,

2587
01:48:40,891 --> 01:48:42,300
uh,
I'm doing the Wilbur.

2588
01:48:42,330 --> 01:48:47,330
I think in January I think I'm doing two
shows and I think what I love about that

2589
01:48:48,420 --> 01:48:49,253
is you go in and for me,
I can do the hour I'm working on the 

2590
01:48:51,690 --> 01:48:52,523
hour I have.
They're all our this new and then when 

2591
01:48:54,181 --> 01:48:55,200
they yelled a machine,
I go,

2592
01:48:55,230 --> 01:48:56,790
it's a theater.
It's called an encore.

2593
01:48:56,850 --> 01:48:59,100
Of course I'll do it.
Thank you for coming to my show.

2594
01:48:59,340 --> 01:49:00,720
Oh,
what about flying dildos?

2595
01:49:00,780 --> 01:49:02,790
Alright guys.
There's nothing after me.

2596
01:49:03,030 --> 01:49:04,290
You won't fly in those.
Here we go.

2597
01:49:04,530 --> 01:49:05,370
I always say,
hey listen,

2598
01:49:05,371 --> 01:49:06,204
I get.
If you have babysitters and you need to 

2599
01:49:06,781 --> 01:49:08,250
go home,
please leave.

2600
01:49:08,400 --> 01:49:10,410
You're not gonna offend me.
I did my show,

2601
01:49:10,411 --> 01:49:11,244
but these are for people,
the hardcore fans and so I've come a 

2602
01:49:14,010 --> 01:49:16,860
point in time.
We got to stop doing that story though.

2603
01:49:16,890 --> 01:49:17,723
Why Theater Online?
Because like do you think that at a 

2604
01:49:21,391 --> 01:49:22,224
certain point in time,
Bill cosby should have stopped doing 

2605
01:49:24,121 --> 01:49:25,290
that?
Noah's Ark joke.

2606
01:49:25,470 --> 01:49:26,430
I never saw it.
Really?

2607
01:49:26,550 --> 01:49:27,160
Okay.
Awesome.

2608
01:49:27,160 --> 01:49:28,710
I'll put it backwards.
How about Ron White?

2609
01:49:29,280 --> 01:49:30,113
Okay.
The.

2610
01:49:30,320 --> 01:49:31,720
Yeah,
never did her salad.

2611
01:49:31,740 --> 01:49:33,030
I doesn't do it.
Yeah.

2612
01:49:33,090 --> 01:49:35,280
Can I tell you something?
But I really want to see them do it.

2613
01:49:35,400 --> 01:49:36,233
Like if I go no,
but I want to see Ron White town to see 

2614
01:49:39,421 --> 01:49:40,380
ron white's new shit.

2615
01:49:40,440 --> 01:49:41,273
I do too.
But if you said Ron White's going to do 

2616
01:49:42,481 --> 01:49:45,510
an hour of new material,
and by the way at the end is an encore,

2617
01:49:45,511 --> 01:49:46,920
he does tater salad,
I'd be like,

2618
01:49:47,290 --> 01:49:49,330
oh sweet.
Somebody yelled out.

2619
01:49:49,380 --> 01:49:51,990
One of my shows recently,
Bruce,

2620
01:49:52,680 --> 01:49:54,070
and I'm like,
I can't do it anymore,

2621
01:49:54,071 --> 01:49:55,690
man.
I don't even know how to do that bit.

2622
01:49:55,720 --> 01:49:57,700
I literally don't know how to do that 
bit.

2623
01:49:57,730 --> 01:50:00,670
I'd have to think about it.
I have to go over it when I'm done,

2624
01:50:00,671 --> 01:50:01,504
I'm done.
I have to put that shit aside and move 

2625
01:50:02,951 --> 01:50:04,870
on.
But I think that story,

2626
01:50:05,110 --> 01:50:06,460
that story for me,
and by the way,

2627
01:50:06,760 --> 01:50:10,930
I would love to not do the story.
I would love like stopped doing it.

2628
01:50:10,990 --> 01:50:11,920
Now.
Hold on though.

2629
01:50:12,100 --> 01:50:12,933
That story for me is such a defining 
like it's the way a lot of people found 

2630
01:50:19,061 --> 01:50:19,894
me.
And for a lot of people it's my 

2631
01:50:21,461 --> 01:50:22,090
nickname.

2632
01:50:22,090 --> 01:50:25,020
It's everything about me.
It's when I go in stages,

2633
01:50:25,060 --> 01:50:27,460
the first thing they're all yelling is 
they're all yelling the machine,

2634
01:50:27,490 --> 01:50:28,690
but they just love you.
Dude.

2635
01:50:28,720 --> 01:50:29,980
That's a.
that's a great story.

2636
01:50:29,981 --> 01:50:32,290
But if you have other great stories that
love those too.

2637
01:50:32,660 --> 01:50:33,493
I,
I,

2638
01:50:33,660 --> 01:50:37,210
I do an hour plus of new material every 
show.

2639
01:50:37,750 --> 01:50:40,030
But man,
he just loved doing that.

2640
01:50:40,090 --> 01:50:41,320
I do not.
Okay.

2641
01:50:41,321 --> 01:50:42,270
Then don't do it.
Uh,

2642
01:50:42,320 --> 01:50:43,153
I don't know.
That's why I'm looking forward to this 

2643
01:50:45,611 --> 01:50:48,160
theater door.
The Wilbur is great.

2644
01:50:48,190 --> 01:50:50,360
I'm doing my Netflix special there.
Are you serious?

2645
01:50:50,361 --> 01:50:51,850
Yeah,
I'm going to do it there in April.

2646
01:50:52,570 --> 01:50:55,720
First Time I did the wilbur coming in 
for somebody at the.

2647
01:50:55,721 --> 01:50:58,630
Wilbur was a year ago,
right after the weight loss challenge.

2648
01:50:58,660 --> 01:50:59,493
Numbers were super slow.
Did the weight loss challenge sold out 

2649
01:51:01,541 --> 01:51:02,770
the next day?
Crazy.

2650
01:51:02,800 --> 01:51:05,140
So I go.
So I go to the Wilbur and I'm like,

2651
01:51:05,170 --> 01:51:07,000
this is fucking to me,
he's a big fucking room.

2652
01:51:07,300 --> 01:51:09,100
I'd never performed a room that big by 
myself,

2653
01:51:09,101 --> 01:51:10,490
like sold it myself.
Right.

2654
01:51:10,900 --> 01:51:11,733
So I was like,
I want to see what it looks like from 

2655
01:51:12,131 --> 01:51:13,930
the top.
Like I want to see like what that.

2656
01:51:14,050 --> 01:51:16,120
So I go up,
climb up the top of the stairs,

2657
01:51:16,610 --> 01:51:17,443
get it to the top.
I go stick my head out and I forget I'm 

2658
01:51:19,751 --> 01:51:20,584
the person.
Everyone came to see like I like and I 

2659
01:51:22,630 --> 01:51:25,300
call is a fucking nightmare of everyone.
Like,

2660
01:51:25,330 --> 01:51:27,160
Holy Shit,
what the fuck you doing up here?

2661
01:51:27,161 --> 01:51:29,750
And then everyone leaves while you were 
at the show.

2662
01:51:29,751 --> 01:51:30,584
I was at the show,
the fucking opening eczema stage and I 

2663
01:51:32,081 --> 01:51:32,914
just had never done that.
Like I'd always been the guy that was 

2664
01:51:34,811 --> 01:51:35,820
the feature act.
Uh,

2665
01:51:35,920 --> 01:51:37,960
so I could go in and go,
oh,

2666
01:51:37,961 --> 01:51:40,600
this is beautiful.
I've never been the guy.

2667
01:51:40,690 --> 01:51:41,523
Right.
And I fucking caused a shit show on the 

2668
01:51:43,511 --> 01:51:44,310
third floor.

2669
01:51:44,310 --> 01:51:45,190
Yeah,
you can't do that.

2670
01:51:45,220 --> 01:51:46,240
Yeah,
I didn't know that.

2671
01:51:47,830 --> 01:51:49,290
Yeah,
there's 900 people there,

2672
01:51:49,300 --> 01:51:50,830
man.
Can't do that.

2673
01:51:51,970 --> 01:51:54,070
That's a great club too,
because it's a three,

2674
01:51:54,071 --> 01:51:56,180
300 seat comedy clubs essentially.
Yeah.

2675
01:51:56,410 --> 01:51:59,470
It's three levels and it's like three,
300 seat levels.

2676
01:51:59,620 --> 01:52:00,453
So it's like intimate comedy clubs,
but there's three of them and they're 

2677
01:52:02,491 --> 01:52:04,930
just stacked on top of each other.
So you just get roars,

2678
01:52:05,110 --> 01:52:07,670
but they're also right there.
It's not a,

2679
01:52:07,680 --> 01:52:11,710
it's like one of the most intimate 900 
seat venues you'll ever work at.

2680
01:52:12,300 --> 01:52:13,930
It was,
I was one of the best shows of my entire

2681
01:52:13,931 --> 01:52:14,764
life.
I like where I just was like right 

2682
01:52:16,301 --> 01:52:17,081
there.
Bam,

2683
01:52:17,081 --> 01:52:19,450
son.
Fucking love that place.

2684
01:52:19,480 --> 01:52:22,870
The Wilbur,
I walked in that door on the left.

2685
01:52:22,871 --> 01:52:26,080
I walked right in that door and walked 
up like a fucking idiot.

2686
01:52:26,081 --> 01:52:28,780
There's a bar right up in between those 
two doors.

2687
01:52:28,810 --> 01:52:30,190
Yeah.
And I just,

2688
01:52:31,480 --> 01:52:34,510
I was doing that place in the late 
eighties.

2689
01:52:35,350 --> 01:52:36,430
Really?
Yeah.

2690
01:52:36,520 --> 01:52:37,420
There was,
um,

2691
01:52:37,510 --> 01:52:38,343
the Wilbur theater has two rooms,
so it has this room and it has another 

2692
01:52:40,991 --> 01:52:41,824
room that's downstairs.
And that room used to be called duck 

2693
01:52:44,810 --> 01:52:46,160
soup,
which is named

2694
01:52:46,160 --> 01:52:48,680
after the Marx brothers movie.
It's a hilarious movie.

2695
01:52:48,730 --> 01:52:51,920
I have never seen it.
It's fucking hilarious.

2696
01:52:52,450 --> 01:52:53,790
I have not.
I need to see it.

2697
01:52:54,230 --> 01:52:55,490
It's all a,
it's all.

2698
01:52:55,840 --> 01:52:57,140
Oh,
it was the type of comedy.

2699
01:52:57,141 --> 01:52:59,050
I don't know what it's called,
but it's like a slapstick.

2700
01:52:59,090 --> 01:53:01,280
No,
it's not even a slap tickets like a hey,

2701
01:53:01,281 --> 01:53:02,680
how about a cigar?
And the guy was like,

2702
01:53:02,681 --> 01:53:03,351
uh,
I don't have one.

2703
01:53:03,351 --> 01:53:03,980
He's like,
no,

2704
01:53:03,980 --> 01:53:05,410
go grab me one down the street.
Huh?

2705
01:53:05,660 --> 01:53:07,760
Like,
it's kind of like a,

2706
01:53:07,780 --> 01:53:08,613
it's,
it's f I fucking thought the movies 

2707
01:53:10,360 --> 01:53:11,193
period style comedy.
Like you get a sense of like the way 

2708
01:53:14,091 --> 01:53:15,710
that people thought.
Yeah.

2709
01:53:15,740 --> 01:53:16,620
Yeah.
It's like a,

2710
01:53:16,640 --> 01:53:19,070
it's like kitschy.
Almost like a,

2711
01:53:19,100 --> 01:53:21,450
like a misleading words.
Like,

2712
01:53:21,570 --> 01:53:23,340
like almost like airplane,
like a,

2713
01:53:24,140 --> 01:53:26,240
we've got to get this woman to the 
hospital hospital.

2714
01:53:26,241 --> 01:53:26,811
What is it?
Oh,

2715
01:53:26,811 --> 01:53:29,510
it's a building with a lot of windows,
but that's not bored right now.

2716
01:53:29,730 --> 01:53:31,580
Like those kind of like that kind of 
comedy.

2717
01:53:31,940 --> 01:53:33,440
Yeah.
Like Abbott and Costello.

2718
01:53:33,441 --> 01:53:35,420
Who's on first?
What's on second?

2719
01:53:35,530 --> 01:53:37,070
Yes.
Yeah.

2720
01:53:38,030 --> 01:53:39,720
Anyway,
I'm duck soup was a,

2721
01:53:39,800 --> 01:53:40,633
uh,
an experiment that the owners of the 

2722
01:53:41,961 --> 01:53:42,794
comedy connection did.
This was back when they really thought 

2723
01:53:44,330 --> 01:53:45,163
that comedy,
like clean comedy was the future and 

2724
01:53:47,871 --> 01:53:48,704
they,
so they decided to create an upscale 

2725
01:53:50,091 --> 01:53:50,924
comedy club,
a very upscale comedy club and serve 

2726
01:53:53,720 --> 01:53:57,590
really good food and have like super 
squeaky clean acts,

2727
01:53:57,591 --> 01:53:59,930
perform their only.
It was a disaster.

2728
01:54:00,290 --> 01:54:02,120
It didn't last because it was like,
everybody's like,

2729
01:54:02,121 --> 01:54:02,954
what the fuck?
Like guys like Steve Sweeney and guys 

2730
01:54:05,031 --> 01:54:06,620
like Lindy Clark who like,
you know,

2731
01:54:06,621 --> 01:54:08,990
they had a lot of dirty jokes,
they couldn't do the dirty jokes.

2732
01:54:08,991 --> 01:54:09,824
They're like,
they were trying to like somehow or 

2733
01:54:11,211 --> 01:54:12,044
another like pure,
it was a disaster is one of the owners 

2734
01:54:14,811 --> 01:54:17,840
of the comedy club had this fucking 
wacky idea in his.

2735
01:54:17,840 --> 01:54:21,020
Had that clean comedy.
Was the future really classy,

2736
01:54:21,021 --> 01:54:23,600
clean comedy.
He wanted to just squeaky clean comedy.

2737
01:54:23,601 --> 01:54:25,400
I mean squeaky clean,
no sex jokes,

2738
01:54:25,401 --> 01:54:27,170
no nothing.
It was death.

2739
01:54:27,680 --> 01:54:29,060
So they bought this,
uh,

2740
01:54:29,061 --> 01:54:29,894
they set this place up,
they spent a shitload of money on 

2741
01:54:31,401 --> 01:54:32,234
construction.
They put this thing together and it was 

2742
01:54:33,741 --> 01:54:35,270
gone within a year.
Really?

2743
01:54:35,271 --> 01:54:36,740
Yeah.
And then it became an Improv.

2744
01:54:36,810 --> 01:54:40,370
Then budd Friedman took it over as an 
Improv and I think they were in business

2745
01:54:40,371 --> 01:54:43,010
with him for awhile.
I think bill bloomin' right.

2746
01:54:43,070 --> 01:54:45,460
Might've had something to do with it.
Um,

2747
01:54:45,500 --> 01:54:48,340
and then then it went under and then,
uh,

2748
01:54:48,380 --> 01:54:50,420
the comedy connection open and Faneuil 
Hall.

2749
01:54:50,480 --> 01:54:52,130
So they had a comedy connection down the
street.

2750
01:54:52,131 --> 01:54:53,810
That was a great club at one point in 
time,

2751
01:54:53,811 --> 01:54:54,644
dude,
they had a the comedy connection in on 

2752
01:54:57,501 --> 01:54:58,334
Washington Street,
which was like 150 seats and then they 

2753
01:55:01,611 --> 01:55:03,290
had nick's comedy stop,
which is down the street,

2754
01:55:03,291 --> 01:55:08,120
which is maybe 300 seats and then they 
had nick's comedy stop at one point,

2755
01:55:08,121 --> 01:55:09,020
had three rooms.

2756
01:55:09,140 --> 01:55:09,973
They had the upstairs room,
they had a downstairs smaller room and 

2757
01:55:12,561 --> 01:55:13,394
then they had this disco that's now a 
gay bar that's at the bottom and that 

2758
01:55:17,211 --> 01:55:18,044
was something they took over.
So they had three shows going 

2759
01:55:20,031 --> 01:55:20,864
consecutively,
so they'd have like Steve Sweeney would 

2760
01:55:23,121 --> 01:55:26,090
go on there and then he would go down to
the small room and then you'd go over to

2761
01:55:26,091 --> 01:55:28,820
the big room and he would do three shows
like that.

2762
01:55:28,821 --> 01:55:33,110
So he would do six sets or a nine sets.
So like,

2763
01:55:33,140 --> 01:55:33,973
wow.
Yeah,

2764
01:55:34,310 --> 01:55:38,270
I probably six probably two shows,
but six sets of two shows,

2765
01:55:38,480 --> 01:55:39,110
you know,
to,

2766
01:55:39,110 --> 01:55:41,090
to,
to like an eight and a 10,

2767
01:55:41,240 --> 01:55:43,890
but an eight and a 10 in all the rooms.
Yeah.

2768
01:55:44,100 --> 01:55:47,160
Oh,
so you do six sets a night and then some

2769
01:55:47,161 --> 01:55:49,170
of the guys would go over to the 
connection,

2770
01:55:49,180 --> 01:55:50,540
do a set,
go over to Nixon,

2771
01:55:50,580 --> 01:55:52,140
do a set,
and then duck soup opened.

2772
01:55:52,620 --> 01:55:53,453
And so like duck soup was the greedy.
That was that they got greedy and that 

2773
01:55:56,071 --> 01:55:58,320
went under.
And when that went under bill bloomin',

2774
01:55:58,321 --> 01:55:59,610
right.
Who was the genius behind?

2775
01:55:59,680 --> 01:56:01,050
He still owns it.
Yeah,

2776
01:56:01,051 --> 01:56:02,880
he's,
he's a financial wizard.

2777
01:56:02,881 --> 01:56:04,460
He was like,
what the fuck are you guys doing?

2778
01:56:04,960 --> 01:56:06,960
Listen,
let me buy you out right here.

2779
01:56:07,500 --> 01:56:08,333
Let me take care of this.
And so bill took over the comedy 

2780
01:56:10,561 --> 01:56:14,340
connection at Faneuil Hall and that,
that became a big success.

2781
01:56:14,460 --> 01:56:15,810
And then they go,
you know,

2782
01:56:15,811 --> 01:56:18,510
he just sat and listened.
I could fill this fucking place up.

2783
01:56:18,511 --> 01:56:21,780
This is like 400 seats.
Why don't I just buy the Wilbur?

2784
01:56:22,080 --> 01:56:25,790
So he bought the wilbur and now that's 
like 900 seats now.

2785
01:56:25,850 --> 01:56:27,660
So that's,
that's the common connection now.

2786
01:56:27,661 --> 01:56:29,570
And he just brings in big acts.
But the,

2787
01:56:29,571 --> 01:56:34,200
the problem is that Boston last,
it's like local thing.

2788
01:56:34,260 --> 01:56:38,310
They lost like the local scene.
A lot of the older big time headliners,

2789
01:56:38,311 --> 01:56:41,430
they got older and older and people sort
of forgot.

2790
01:56:41,440 --> 01:56:46,260
And then the open mic night scene once 
patrice left and once burr left,

2791
01:56:46,620 --> 01:56:47,280
um,
the,

2792
01:56:47,280 --> 01:56:49,110
the,
like the guys coming up,

2793
01:56:49,140 --> 01:56:51,360
there's not as strong.
I think there is now laugh.

2794
01:56:51,361 --> 01:56:54,120
Boston has got a good scene.
Last time I was there,

2795
01:56:54,121 --> 01:56:55,860
they were pretty excited about the 
scene.

2796
01:56:55,861 --> 01:56:58,710
They're saying this a lot of up and 
coming guys coming and Gals,

2797
01:56:58,740 --> 01:56:59,573
excuse me,
and binary nonbinary people and they've 

2798
01:57:02,611 --> 01:57:03,640
developed like,
you know,

2799
01:57:03,720 --> 01:57:07,890
a good group of local people that are 
really doing the right thing,

2800
01:57:07,920 --> 01:57:09,630
trying to,
trying to really get good at comedy.

2801
01:57:09,631 --> 01:57:11,940
But Shit,
there was stitches,

2802
01:57:12,240 --> 01:57:15,180
there was a catch,
a rising star and Cambridge.

2803
01:57:15,450 --> 01:57:18,210
There was um,
a play it again.

2804
01:57:18,211 --> 01:57:20,370
Sam's had a show.
It was fucking crazy.

2805
01:57:20,371 --> 01:57:22,350
Like for a small town.
I mean,

2806
01:57:22,380 --> 01:57:25,380
Boston's not small,
but it's not a huge city like Chicago or

2807
01:57:25,381 --> 01:57:29,190
New York.
And for this relatively small city,

2808
01:57:29,580 --> 01:57:33,600
you had a fuck load of comedy and really
good comedy.

2809
01:57:34,020 --> 01:57:38,700
That's what I love about the stores that
you could hit three stages in one night.

2810
01:57:38,760 --> 01:57:40,380
I do it all the time of Trifecta.
Yeah,

2811
01:57:40,381 --> 01:57:41,214
I've done.
I've done that like three or four times 

2812
01:57:42,061 --> 01:57:43,330
this year.
Yeah.

2813
01:57:43,450 --> 01:57:47,290
I'm due to their regularly.
I love Jeremiah's new state new material

2814
01:57:47,291 --> 01:57:47,890
show.
Yeah,

2815
01:57:47,890 --> 01:57:49,560
that's,
that's where I wrote that joke.

2816
01:57:50,100 --> 01:57:51,980
The Helen Keller and frank joke.
Oh yeah,

2817
01:57:53,010 --> 01:57:54,510
yeah.
Some guy just said it on stage.

2818
01:57:54,511 --> 01:57:55,344
I saw.
I used to think they're the same person 

2819
01:57:56,490 --> 01:57:57,680
and like I was staying in the back of 
your like,

2820
01:57:57,690 --> 01:57:59,010
that better be a fucking pit.
And I was like,

2821
01:57:59,011 --> 01:58:00,540
Nah,
I'm just an idiot.

2822
01:58:01,490 --> 01:58:03,930
And then I open up flying builders with 
that and I was like,

2823
01:58:04,210 --> 01:58:06,330
that still aI.
love that show.

2824
01:58:06,450 --> 01:58:07,890
Yeah,
it's a fun way.

2825
01:58:07,891 --> 01:58:09,330
An exercise.
I just did it Tuesday,

2826
01:58:09,730 --> 01:58:10,351
I,
by the way.

2827
01:58:10,351 --> 01:58:11,184
And I just started getting the vibe,
like it took me a long time to 

2828
01:58:14,131 --> 01:58:14,760
understand the.

2829
01:58:14,760 --> 01:58:18,960
Or like the Olr for me was a little bit 
of an uphill battle.

2830
01:58:19,020 --> 01:58:20,820
The main rooms always been.
It's like,

2831
01:58:21,120 --> 01:58:23,260
so it was a great,
just a great performed,

2832
01:58:23,310 --> 01:58:26,930
but like I think I was looking at tor as
like a,

2833
01:58:27,660 --> 01:58:32,400
as like more of like less of a club and 
more of like a workshop and I was like,

2834
01:58:32,401 --> 01:58:32,631
no,
no,

2835
01:58:32,631 --> 01:58:32,911
no,
no,

2836
01:58:32,911 --> 01:58:33,744
you just got.
This is where you have to be able to 

2837
01:58:34,861 --> 01:58:36,780
selling guns.
You've got to be able to,

2838
01:58:37,080 --> 01:58:37,913
to change subjects,
moving the jet to really read a crowd 

2839
01:58:40,411 --> 01:58:42,820
and take their energy and move with it.
Like,

2840
01:58:42,821 --> 01:58:44,260
you know,
this sounds silly that I say this,

2841
01:58:44,290 --> 01:58:47,950
but like in a rich vos kind of way,
he's someone that could navigate the our

2842
01:58:48,160 --> 01:58:49,420
seamlessly,
you know,

2843
01:58:49,421 --> 01:58:52,150
because you can read an audience and 
take the energy and push it.

2844
01:58:52,240 --> 01:58:55,360
What's a very intimate room to like a 
lot of those guys from New York,

2845
01:58:55,361 --> 01:58:58,990
they used to be an on top of people 
because New York clubs are very small,

2846
01:58:58,991 --> 01:58:59,980
which is really weird,
right?

2847
01:58:59,981 --> 01:59:02,770
Because New York is so big,
but the space is small.

2848
01:59:02,950 --> 01:59:03,783
Like you have a lot of small spaces like
you ever do the stand or a stand up New 

2849
01:59:07,750 --> 01:59:08,141
York,
stand up.

2850
01:59:08,141 --> 01:59:08,974
New York is a perfect example.
Like you could barely move on stage for 

2851
01:59:11,111 --> 01:59:14,140
caroline's.
Caroline's is like a fucking table.

2852
01:59:14,510 --> 01:59:15,343
This table,
this table is bigger than the stage at 

2853
01:59:17,351 --> 01:59:19,900
Caroline's and when you're,
you're there,

2854
01:59:19,901 --> 01:59:22,270
you're on top of the people and they're 
sitting right in front of you.

2855
01:59:22,340 --> 01:59:22,890
It's,
it's,

2856
01:59:22,890 --> 01:59:24,130
it's odd,
you know?

2857
01:59:24,240 --> 01:59:25,350
Yeah.
You get used to like,

2858
01:59:25,360 --> 01:59:27,940
where are you from sir?
That's why a lot of New York comics talk

2859
01:59:27,950 --> 01:59:32,950
to the crowd and they also do like 
fairly short chunks.

2860
01:59:33,460 --> 01:59:34,293
Right?
The bits are smaller and that's also 

2861
01:59:35,771 --> 01:59:37,510
because they're sets are like seven 
minutes long.

2862
01:59:37,920 --> 01:59:38,753
Yeah.
I remember coming out here with Bobby 

2863
01:59:40,290 --> 01:59:41,123
Kelly when probably it was with Bobby 
Kelly the first night I did a spot out 

2864
01:59:42,601 --> 01:59:43,434
here and I got on stage and I was like,
I remember in my head going where the 

2865
01:59:45,931 --> 01:59:47,700
Puerto Rican.
I was like,

2866
01:59:47,701 --> 01:59:48,870
wait,
what am I going to talk about?

2867
01:59:48,900 --> 01:59:50,340
And I remember bobby getting up and 
going,

2868
01:59:50,640 --> 01:59:51,930
both of us were sitting in the back.
He's like,

2869
01:59:52,170 --> 01:59:54,990
I don't like this fucking clever shit.
He's fucking joke.

2870
01:59:54,991 --> 01:59:56,850
Clever Shit.
Be fucking funny.

2871
01:59:56,851 --> 01:59:58,020
And both of us were like,
yeah,

2872
01:59:58,170 --> 01:59:59,340
how can they be funny?
Like,

2873
01:59:59,341 --> 02:00:01,080
yeah,
but with the westerns were like used to.

2874
02:00:01,500 --> 02:00:02,333
I used to make the analogy working out,
doing standup in New York was like 

2875
02:00:04,200 --> 02:00:06,270
working out in the prison yard.
You had a,

2876
02:00:06,390 --> 02:00:09,960
you had a broomstick and cinder blocks 
and you just wanted to get big enough so

2877
02:00:09,961 --> 02:00:10,794
you couldn't get raped in the shower and
then working out in la was like almost 

2878
02:00:13,471 --> 02:00:15,360
like being at a gold's gym.
You were sculpted,

2879
02:00:15,361 --> 02:00:17,850
you look good but you couldn't defend 
yourself in a real room.

2880
02:00:18,270 --> 02:00:21,240
And so like I looked at it that way and 
then I was like,

2881
02:00:21,270 --> 02:00:22,103
Oh,
if you do the road you can do a little 

2882
02:00:22,831 --> 02:00:23,664
bit of both and you can really have fun.
I think the road is where I really 

2883
02:00:26,611 --> 02:00:30,920
learned how to do stand up.
Like for like doing an hour that were.

2884
02:00:31,000 --> 02:00:32,010
That was what I was like,
Oh,

2885
02:00:32,100 --> 02:00:33,620
you need to be able to like,

2886
02:00:33,810 --> 02:00:37,320
well you also have to do an hour.
That translates in Kansas City.

2887
02:00:37,530 --> 02:00:40,200
You could do it in Florida,
make strangers laugh.

2888
02:00:40,560 --> 02:00:41,880
Use Case said that.
He goes,

2889
02:00:41,881 --> 02:00:42,601
someone said,
why don't you do?

2890
02:00:42,601 --> 02:00:43,434
Ucb Goes,

2891
02:00:43,740 --> 02:00:44,380
oh,
because they are.

2892
02:00:44,380 --> 02:00:45,250
They're already gonna laugh.
Anyway.

2893
02:00:45,251 --> 02:00:47,350
I want the art form is making strangers 
laugh.

2894
02:00:47,440 --> 02:00:48,430
Yeah.
And you're like,

2895
02:00:48,431 --> 02:00:49,870
yeah,
you gotta make people that.

2896
02:00:50,700 --> 02:00:52,290
Well,
that's why a lot of people do like to do

2897
02:00:52,291 --> 02:00:53,124
drop ins.
They don't want people coming to see 

2898
02:00:54,601 --> 02:00:57,180
them.
They like to do a set where people don't

2899
02:00:57,181 --> 02:00:58,620
have any idea that they're going to be 
there.

2900
02:00:59,460 --> 02:01:00,690
There's a,
there's definitely a,

2901
02:01:01,200 --> 02:01:03,780
there's a thought process to that.
I did Largo last night,

2902
02:01:03,781 --> 02:01:05,010
which was,
what was that like?

2903
02:01:05,040 --> 02:01:08,340
They laugh at your setups.
The setups.

2904
02:01:08,341 --> 02:01:09,174
They,
they're fucking dying laughing at the 

2905
02:01:09,961 --> 02:01:10,551
setups.
It's,

2906
02:01:10,551 --> 02:01:12,990
it's so odd.
Say so polite.

2907
02:01:13,440 --> 02:01:16,440
It's a beautiful space.
The room's amazing.

2908
02:01:16,441 --> 02:01:18,360
It's a great setup.
Yeah.

2909
02:01:18,361 --> 02:01:19,200
I mean,
it was weird.

2910
02:01:19,600 --> 02:01:20,433
The nerdist meltdown one time and uh,
and I just told a story like just the 

2911
02:01:25,131 --> 02:01:28,190
story that I was working on and it 
murdered so hard and I was like,

2912
02:01:28,191 --> 02:01:33,050
this is a really legit comedy club fan.
They love comedy.

2913
02:01:33,110 --> 02:01:35,360
Yeah.
Any little nuance to a joke,

2914
02:01:35,361 --> 02:01:36,500
they're like,
they appreciate it.

2915
02:01:36,501 --> 02:01:37,161
They're like,
man,

2916
02:01:37,161 --> 02:01:40,040
that was well played.
I saw that movie in high school to all

2917
02:01:40,070 --> 02:01:40,903
rooms though.
The problem with those rooms is that if 

2918
02:01:43,461 --> 02:01:48,461
you just work those rooms and then you 
try to do a satiny or your Foxville,

2919
02:01:48,620 --> 02:01:49,453
like if you try to go on after Joey Diaz
in the Olr and all you do is all rooms 

2920
02:01:53,330 --> 02:01:55,340
and by the way Adam,
that sick fuck,

2921
02:01:55,341 --> 02:01:59,020
he will throw you on after Joey Diaz if 
he thinks you do a lot of rooms.

2922
02:01:59,430 --> 02:02:02,000
You know like.
I don't want to mention any names,

2923
02:02:02,180 --> 02:02:05,060
but I've seen people just incinerate up 
there.

2924
02:02:05,150 --> 02:02:05,983
You know,
because you're used to this like really 

2925
02:02:07,431 --> 02:02:10,070
polite,
set up punchline sort of crowd.

2926
02:02:10,430 --> 02:02:12,530
The comedy store.
You get a lot of this,

2927
02:02:13,150 --> 02:02:15,770
you gotta have people that are like,
come on is the best club in the world.

2928
02:02:15,771 --> 02:02:16,760
Huh?
Come on.

2929
02:02:17,060 --> 02:02:18,830
You know,
you see people that are drunk.

2930
02:02:18,860 --> 02:02:21,900
You get a surprising number of hecklers.
The,

2931
02:02:21,970 --> 02:02:25,280
the back hallway is always fucking 
talkative.

2932
02:02:25,310 --> 02:02:28,220
Like you have to shut up.
That's a terrible design.

2933
02:02:28,430 --> 02:02:30,080
Like they'd been trying to figure out a 
work around,

2934
02:02:30,081 --> 02:02:32,150
maybe you could figure it out,
I don't know what the fuck to do,

2935
02:02:32,450 --> 02:02:33,283
but that back hallway always has people 
and they're talking and then even if 

2936
02:02:36,621 --> 02:02:37,454
they're not talking to people off to the
side of the parking lot that leaks to 

2937
02:02:39,621 --> 02:02:40,454
the back of the room.
Like you'll see people that are in the 

2938
02:02:41,691 --> 02:02:42,524
back of the store and the are.
You see them turning around all the 

2939
02:02:45,531 --> 02:02:46,400
time.
Like what the fuck?

2940
02:02:46,401 --> 02:02:47,440
It's so loud there.

2941
02:02:47,710 --> 02:02:48,543
I was on stage one time and clearly 
almost agent I go clearly someone very 

2942
02:02:54,041 --> 02:02:57,580
famous just walked into the hallway 
because I get to hear everyone like,

2943
02:02:57,581 --> 02:02:58,690
Oh hey,
what's up?

2944
02:02:58,750 --> 02:02:59,583
Yeah.
And then it was loud and immediately I 

2945
02:03:01,401 --> 02:03:03,490
just go,
I'm whoever I am planning on bringing up

2946
02:03:03,491 --> 02:03:06,340
next is not going up and I get that 
light and I look over.

2947
02:03:06,341 --> 02:03:07,061
I go,
who's next?

2948
02:03:07,061 --> 02:03:08,980
I'm dying to know.
And they go eight to Louis and went,

2949
02:03:08,981 --> 02:03:09,820
okay.
That's what I thought.

2950
02:03:11,580 --> 02:03:12,413
Yeah.
You could tell telling somebody it's 

2951
02:03:13,500 --> 02:03:15,960
just a bad setup in that regard.
You know,

2952
02:03:15,961 --> 02:03:19,470
the or is a bad setup in the sense of 
that hallway,

2953
02:03:19,471 --> 02:03:20,304
but it's a great setup in sense of the 
size of the space and the intimacy of 

2954
02:03:23,581 --> 02:03:24,750
it.
The main rooms.

2955
02:03:24,751 --> 02:03:25,620
Perfect.
Main rooms.

2956
02:03:25,650 --> 02:03:26,490
Perfect.
Perfect.

2957
02:03:26,520 --> 02:03:27,353
Perfect.

2958
02:03:27,880 --> 02:03:29,380
That you've got the great hangout in the
back.

2959
02:03:29,960 --> 02:03:31,600
Can't hear you.
Can't hear shit.

2960
02:03:31,630 --> 02:03:32,463
Yeah.
Me and Santinello and bill burl 

2961
02:03:34,750 --> 02:03:37,090
Kristalina last night.
We're fucking howling.

2962
02:03:37,360 --> 02:03:40,900
Just making each other laugh.
Just talking shit and just having a good

2963
02:03:40,901 --> 02:03:43,300
time talking about nick cannon.
Standup special.

2964
02:03:43,370 --> 02:03:44,290
Oops,
sorry.

2965
02:03:44,980 --> 02:03:47,650
But it was just so much dig.
Doe.

2966
02:03:49,870 --> 02:03:50,980
Yes.
Um,

2967
02:03:51,520 --> 02:03:53,560
we're having such a good time just 
talking,

2968
02:03:54,010 --> 02:03:56,140
just shooting the Shit,
talking about,

2969
02:03:56,170 --> 02:03:57,990
you know,
clubs on the road and doing.

2970
02:03:58,150 --> 02:03:59,470
It's just,
it's like,

2971
02:03:59,500 --> 02:04:01,150
you know,
you get a chance to talk shop,

2972
02:04:01,900 --> 02:04:02,870
get silly dude

2973
02:04:02,870 --> 02:04:03,703
back there.
Look,

2974
02:04:03,740 --> 02:04:06,230
there's touchstones in your life where 
you go.

2975
02:04:06,440 --> 02:04:08,140
These conversations were meaningful.
Yeah.

2976
02:04:08,180 --> 02:04:09,013
I remember a night I was just started up
doing birth conquer again and you and 

2977
02:04:12,111 --> 02:04:12,944
Bert were sitting,
you were standing and he was sitting in 

2978
02:04:14,421 --> 02:04:16,580
that corner seat where the door opens 
over to hit you.

2979
02:04:16,940 --> 02:04:18,560
And both you.
I remember you.

2980
02:04:18,561 --> 02:04:19,790
I don't know what happened.
You go,

2981
02:04:20,150 --> 02:04:22,370
how much money is enough money and I 
went what?

2982
02:04:22,610 --> 02:04:23,443
And you're like,
and you guys looked at each other and 

2983
02:04:24,201 --> 02:04:25,034
you're like,
I mean,

2984
02:04:25,310 --> 02:04:27,020
how much money?
Like how much money do you need?

2985
02:04:27,021 --> 02:04:29,570
Like you're doing all the travel channel
again at bars like,

2986
02:04:29,630 --> 02:04:30,150
eh,
nothing,

2987
02:04:30,150 --> 02:04:31,100
nothing.
Your show socks.

2988
02:04:31,101 --> 02:04:35,150
Like I just do stand up for both of you.
Sat there and you were like,

2989
02:04:35,240 --> 02:04:36,320
you're good.
Stand up man.

2990
02:04:36,620 --> 02:04:38,010
I don't know you're doing on this TV 
show.

2991
02:04:38,011 --> 02:04:39,770
Just get back to stand up.
And I was like,

2992
02:04:40,200 --> 02:04:41,033
only at the comedy store.
You get that conversation and only with 

2993
02:04:43,231 --> 02:04:45,180
your friends.
I remember hearing that going,

2994
02:04:45,580 --> 02:04:46,500
get what the fuck.
You're like,

2995
02:04:46,501 --> 02:04:48,090
dude,
you monetize your podcast,

2996
02:04:48,300 --> 02:04:50,520
you do the road and you could hang out 
here.

2997
02:04:50,521 --> 02:04:53,140
And we all like,
what is this your show?

2998
02:04:53,141 --> 02:04:53,974
Are you really happy?

2999
02:04:54,230 --> 02:04:55,063
So important to have friends that will 
tell you that too because sometimes you 

3000
02:04:56,811 --> 02:04:58,710
don't think you can do it.
You feel like,

3001
02:04:58,711 --> 02:04:59,930
oh,
I have to stay under contract.

3002
02:04:59,931 --> 02:05:00,764
I have to have to keep working.
But I knew you were on the road for 

3003
02:05:03,320 --> 02:05:05,090
fucking weeks at a time.
Like,

3004
02:05:05,091 --> 02:05:06,380
Bert,
you don't want to do this.

3005
02:05:06,530 --> 02:05:09,320
You're a funny guy and you're not really
working.

3006
02:05:09,321 --> 02:05:10,970
I stand up that much.
Let's be honest.

3007
02:05:11,180 --> 02:05:12,013
You'd go on the road,
you wouldn't do standup for weeks at a 

3008
02:05:13,041 --> 02:05:13,610
time.

3009
02:05:13,610 --> 02:05:14,443
I'd try to put in a date like jamming 
the data in between touring but are 

3010
02:05:17,390 --> 02:05:18,223
doing travel channel.
But the truth was I'd be away from my 

3011
02:05:19,341 --> 02:05:19,830
family,

3012
02:05:19,830 --> 02:05:21,270
be a mess.
And not only that,

3013
02:05:21,271 --> 02:05:23,940
it's not enough like a date doesn't do 
shit.

3014
02:05:23,941 --> 02:05:24,900
It's just like you go,
wow,

3015
02:05:24,901 --> 02:05:25,734
I was rusty.
That's all you gotta do you know you 

3016
02:05:27,241 --> 02:05:28,440
need to be,
you know,

3017
02:05:28,441 --> 02:05:30,150
stand up comedies like running,
you know,

3018
02:05:30,151 --> 02:05:32,190
you take a month off running,
you're going to be out of shape,

3019
02:05:32,460 --> 02:05:33,091
you know,
you gotTa,

3020
02:05:33,091 --> 02:05:35,160
you gotta be fucking constantly going at
it.

3021
02:05:35,190 --> 02:05:36,023
It's,
it's,

3022
02:05:36,260 --> 02:05:39,840
it's a beautiful grind.
Yeah.

3023
02:05:40,090 --> 02:05:42,720
I'm so glad you decided to bail on that 
shit too.

3024
02:05:43,140 --> 02:05:48,140
So the best thing to watch is on.
No one's my fitbit and I ran four miles.

3025
02:05:49,130 --> 02:05:50,040
Yeah.
But I keep it.

3026
02:05:50,690 --> 02:05:52,980
I keep it just to track my try to get to
18,000

3027
02:05:52,981 --> 02:05:53,814
steps,
but you don't want the other watches as 

3028
02:05:54,260 --> 02:05:55,093
well.
It was a gift.

3029
02:05:55,770 --> 02:05:57,810
This has sentimental value.
It's not even the time isn't even.

3030
02:05:57,811 --> 02:05:58,770
Right.
Oh really?

3031
02:05:59,160 --> 02:05:59,993
It's like a bracelet.

3032
02:06:00,050 --> 02:06:01,530
The bracelet.
My destiny a girl,

3033
02:06:01,800 --> 02:06:03,480
but yeah.
You've got a bracelet on.

3034
02:06:03,610 --> 02:06:05,780
Yeah.
Guys wearing bracelets disturbed me.

3035
02:06:06,230 --> 02:06:08,580
What are you doing?
There was a period where I was wearing a

3036
02:06:08,581 --> 02:06:11,220
few bracelets.
Drives me nuts guys with three bracelets

3037
02:06:11,221 --> 02:06:12,180
on one wrist.
Like,

3038
02:06:12,181 --> 02:06:13,950
Hey,
you stop.

3039
02:06:14,700 --> 02:06:15,533
Especially like Italian guys,
like three gold bracelets and the pinky 

3040
02:06:19,141 --> 02:06:20,880
ring.
But you're not in the jewelry guy.

3041
02:06:21,840 --> 02:06:22,720
Uh,
no,

3042
02:06:23,260 --> 02:06:24,510
no.
I've been a jewelry guy.

3043
02:06:24,540 --> 02:06:25,373
Thought it was your jewelry guy.
What kind of joy do you ever have a 

3044
02:06:28,411 --> 02:06:29,940
pinky ring?
A?

3045
02:06:29,941 --> 02:06:31,560
Yeah.
You ever have a diamond ring?

3046
02:06:32,080 --> 02:06:33,200
A.
No.

3047
02:06:33,201 --> 02:06:34,034
I bought a diamond ring.
I've had a plethora of bracelets before 

3048
02:06:36,871 --> 02:06:37,750
though.
Yeah,

3049
02:06:37,800 --> 02:06:40,290
I don't.
I barely wash my car.

3050
02:06:40,800 --> 02:06:43,830
Oh seriously?
I wash my corvette.

3051
02:06:43,860 --> 02:06:46,390
That's the only one I wash that in my 
porsche.

3052
02:06:46,391 --> 02:06:48,330
I washed,
but the corvette is just.

3053
02:06:48,350 --> 02:06:50,790
It's barely a car.
The corvette is like an art piece.

3054
02:06:51,450 --> 02:06:52,283
The funny thing about you is how,
how annexter ordinary you believe you 

3055
02:06:56,471 --> 02:06:57,820
are like,
well,

3056
02:06:57,920 --> 02:07:00,340
I'll tell you that when we tell him,
and I did the first hot yoga,

3057
02:07:00,610 --> 02:07:01,443
we did the hot yoga,
we got done and we were really fucking 

3058
02:07:03,161 --> 02:07:06,250
floored and the first thing we said was 
already not doing it right.

3059
02:07:06,251 --> 02:07:07,640
There's no way he could do these in 
date.

3060
02:07:07,650 --> 02:07:10,270
And the second thing Tom said was,
you know,

3061
02:07:11,050 --> 02:07:11,883
at this point in Jos day,
it's only like 10 in the morning and he 

3062
02:07:14,171 --> 02:07:17,110
hasn't done kettlebells run or a podcast
or sets yet.

3063
02:07:17,410 --> 02:07:18,940
I was like,
I'm going home and eating candy bar.

3064
02:07:18,941 --> 02:07:19,774
I'm going to pat.
But like that's the one thing that's 

3065
02:07:23,081 --> 02:07:24,700
been pushing me through this month is I 
go,

3066
02:07:25,120 --> 02:07:26,650
all right,
I'm going to go and run now.

3067
02:07:26,680 --> 02:07:27,513
I'm going to,
I'm going to try to do more in a day 

3068
02:07:28,721 --> 02:07:30,210
than I normally do.
And,

3069
02:07:30,320 --> 02:07:35,320
and I think that is only achievable.
I've only people a real true balance

3070
02:07:36,310 --> 02:07:37,143
of like being sober and healthy and not 
just getting off the fucking rails all 

3071
02:07:39,851 --> 02:07:40,541
the time.
Yeah.

3072
02:07:40,541 --> 02:07:41,380
Because if you do

3073
02:07:41,460 --> 02:07:42,293
go off the rails all the time,
your body's just not capable of working 

3074
02:07:44,251 --> 02:07:45,084
hard and if you're it just steps right.
It's like you can't just start running 

3075
02:07:49,801 --> 02:07:53,130
six miles a day and doing kettle bells.
Then taking a 90 minute yoga class,

3076
02:07:53,131 --> 02:07:55,310
you're not going to have the energy.
Your body's not that.

3077
02:07:55,550 --> 02:07:59,670
You're not conditioned to do it,
but you can work out.

3078
02:07:59,910 --> 02:08:00,743
You could work up to those things.
Like you could start off with just a 

3079
02:08:02,821 --> 02:08:05,070
light half mile run.
You could start out with,

3080
02:08:05,260 --> 02:08:07,940
do your best in a 90 minute yoga class.
You know,

3081
02:08:07,950 --> 02:08:08,783
you could start out doing all these 
different things and then over time you 

3082
02:08:11,881 --> 02:08:14,910
build up conditioning and strength and 
health.

3083
02:08:14,911 --> 02:08:16,770
And you know,
I'm 50 years old,

3084
02:08:16,771 --> 02:08:17,604
dude,
I've never been in better shape of my 

3085
02:08:18,241 --> 02:08:19,560
life,
never been more healthy.

3086
02:08:19,860 --> 02:08:21,870
I work out all the time.
I feel great.

3087
02:08:22,320 --> 02:08:23,071
I mean,
they're really do.

3088
02:08:23,071 --> 02:08:25,070
And I just always want to tell people 
that like you,

3089
02:08:25,660 --> 02:08:27,540
you can't.
Obviously,

3090
02:08:27,541 --> 02:08:28,374
a lot of people have way more time 
requirements and I do in terms of like 

3091
02:08:30,690 --> 02:08:35,250
your day job and stuff like that.
But the more effort you put into keeping

3092
02:08:35,251 --> 02:08:37,620
your body healthy,
the better you're going to feel.

3093
02:08:37,650 --> 02:08:40,770
You're just gonna have more energy.
I feel good all the time,

3094
02:08:41,220 --> 02:08:42,053
you know,
and I feel better this week or this 

3095
02:08:43,520 --> 02:08:45,450
month is 12 days in.
I really do.

3096
02:08:45,730 --> 02:08:47,260
I do too.
I love it.

3097
02:08:48,070 --> 02:08:48,601
I don't know.
I,

3098
02:08:48,601 --> 02:08:49,434
I,
I think the first drink's going to be 

3099
02:08:50,681 --> 02:08:51,514
hard for me to take because I feel I 
feel like I'll be letting myself down 

3100
02:08:54,340 --> 02:08:55,540
because I get,
like I said,

3101
02:08:55,541 --> 02:08:56,374
I get teetotaller and I get guarantee 
that first drink I probably do a shot 

3102
02:08:59,201 --> 02:09:00,760
with red and then I'm like,
I don't think I'm gonna go to bed.

3103
02:09:00,960 --> 02:09:03,400
Does Dari do shots?
He's like a drink.

3104
02:09:03,740 --> 02:09:06,760
Have a glass of whiskey with ice or 
something like that.

3105
02:09:06,761 --> 02:09:09,430
I saw him do shots in Calgary here.
Oh yeah.

3106
02:09:09,431 --> 02:09:11,530
And then we lost him.
He didn't use to drink.

3107
02:09:11,860 --> 02:09:14,350
I know when I first met him,
he didn't drink at all.

3108
02:09:14,351 --> 02:09:16,810
He would smoke weed but he didn't drink 
and then he became a drink.

3109
02:09:16,811 --> 02:09:18,970
And when you moved to New York it was 
that really?

3110
02:09:19,000 --> 02:09:19,930
Yeah.
Yeah.

3111
02:09:20,290 --> 02:09:21,760
I never remember seeing him drink ever.

3112
02:09:21,760 --> 02:09:24,260
I remember when he lived here,
we'd go to the store,

3113
02:09:24,280 --> 02:09:25,113
do something,
like a podcast or something and he get 

3114
02:09:26,441 --> 02:09:27,190
high,
but he just,

3115
02:09:27,190 --> 02:09:28,690
he didn't have.
He would eat candy.

3116
02:09:29,230 --> 02:09:31,430
That was his thing,
was like,

3117
02:09:31,431 --> 02:09:32,770
ah,
I can't imagine candy now.

3118
02:09:32,780 --> 02:09:34,150
My,
I fucking love candy.

3119
02:09:34,240 --> 02:09:36,130
Yeah.
Well after a workout,

3120
02:09:36,131 --> 02:09:38,020
it's nothing wrong with it.
Some people actually like candy,

3121
02:09:38,021 --> 02:09:40,420
like a lot of lifters,
a lot of people lift.

3122
02:09:40,630 --> 02:09:42,220
They like to eat candy after they work 
out.

3123
02:09:42,250 --> 02:09:42,880
Really?
Yeah.

3124
02:09:42,880 --> 02:09:44,890
Replenish those sugars.
Supply the muscles.

3125
02:09:45,430 --> 02:09:46,560
It's controversial,
you know,

3126
02:09:46,570 --> 02:09:48,460
some people don't agree with that.
Some people do.

3127
02:09:48,760 --> 02:09:50,230
It's um,
you know,

3128
02:09:50,240 --> 02:09:52,660
it's dependent upon what kind of Diet 
you have normally.

3129
02:09:53,590 --> 02:09:56,740
No,
I try to stay away from bread and pasta.

3130
02:09:56,741 --> 02:09:58,090
That's to.
That's awesome.

3131
02:09:58,270 --> 02:09:59,000
Yeah.

3132
02:09:59,000 --> 02:10:00,280
Big One.
Do that.

3133
02:10:00,370 --> 02:10:01,900
You'll be healthier,
you know.

3134
02:10:01,901 --> 02:10:02,734
Uh,
my friend Cameron Hanes is running the 

3135
02:10:03,701 --> 02:10:07,360
Moab tomorrow.
He starts the Moab to 40,

3136
02:10:07,870 --> 02:10:08,703
which is a 238 mile race and he's been 
running a marathon a day for months in 

3137
02:10:15,851 --> 02:10:20,851
preparation for this.
And tomorrow he begins a 238 mile race.

3138
02:10:23,351 --> 02:10:28,351
You could track it at www dot moab,
two hundred.com,

3139
02:10:29,021 --> 02:10:30,070
m o a,
b,

3140
02:10:30,071 --> 02:10:32,150
two hundred.com.
And uh,

3141
02:10:32,190 --> 02:10:34,550
you're gonna be able to track its 
performance and where he's at.

3142
02:10:34,551 --> 02:10:39,551
And it'll take shit probably.
And also a UAE outdoor.

3143
02:10:40,740 --> 02:10:43,510
There'll be posting live video at UAA 
outdoor use,

3144
02:10:43,511 --> 02:10:45,230
outdoor,
a under armour outdoor.

3145
02:10:45,530 --> 02:10:46,820
I think that's you.
A outdoor.

3146
02:10:46,821 --> 02:10:48,410
The instagram page,
right?

3147
02:10:48,411 --> 02:10:50,000
Click on that real quick.
Yeah.

3148
02:10:50,050 --> 02:10:51,560
And there it is.
It shows all his stuff.

3149
02:10:52,490 --> 02:10:57,080
He's out there representing underarmor 
running his fucking animal.

3150
02:10:57,140 --> 02:10:59,120
It's funny it says,
when I first started off running,

3151
02:10:59,360 --> 02:11:02,540
I struggled with a five k now doing 200 
mile races.

3152
02:11:02,750 --> 02:11:04,520
It's not that I was born with this 
amazing talent.

3153
02:11:04,521 --> 02:11:06,140
Your body gets used to what you ask of 
it.

3154
02:11:06,430 --> 02:11:08,630
If you don't ask much of it,
it isn't going to give you much.

3155
02:11:08,810 --> 02:11:09,643
If you don't ask much of it,
it isn't going to give you instead of 

3156
02:11:11,490 --> 02:11:13,730
twice for some reason.
If you ask a lot of it,

3157
02:11:14,330 --> 02:11:15,163
it will give you a lot.
Somebody should tell them that they 

3158
02:11:17,450 --> 02:11:19,070
needed that sentence.
He can edit that,

3159
02:11:19,250 --> 02:11:20,960
edit that shit.
Jesus Christ,

3160
02:11:21,050 --> 02:11:23,570
under armour.
Get your shit together.

3161
02:11:23,730 --> 02:11:25,170
He's a fascinating guy,
man.

3162
02:11:25,470 --> 02:11:26,410
He's a,
you know,

3163
02:11:27,270 --> 02:11:32,180
whatever the podcast thing has done is 
introduced me to people like him and not

3164
02:11:32,181 --> 02:11:34,710
in green tree who are just,
I find fascinating.

3165
02:11:34,830 --> 02:11:35,900
Yeah.
And uh,

3166
02:11:35,920 --> 02:11:38,790
and some fan made me a table.
I picked it up today.

3167
02:11:38,791 --> 02:11:41,880
I put it on my instagram and that he 
just put like all the,

3168
02:11:42,140 --> 02:11:45,420
I guess all the stuff I dig and he,
one of the things he put on the side was

3169
02:11:45,421 --> 02:11:47,190
a no one cares work harder.

3170
02:11:47,290 --> 02:11:48,720
Yeah.
And I was like,

3171
02:11:49,200 --> 02:11:50,560
this cams t shirt.
Yeah,

3172
02:11:50,561 --> 02:11:51,640
that's his.
One of his sayings.

3173
02:11:51,641 --> 02:11:53,740
And that's real.
You know,

3174
02:11:53,760 --> 02:11:56,950
I posted something on instagram today 
that there's levels to this shit.

3175
02:11:57,370 --> 02:11:58,390
You know,
what we were talking about,

3176
02:11:58,391 --> 02:12:00,040
like I'm,
I'm very self critical,

3177
02:12:00,041 --> 02:12:00,874
like super hyper self critical.
But one of the reasons why I'm hyper 

3178
02:12:03,221 --> 02:12:04,054
self critical is I know people who are 
just real savages who really are doing 

3179
02:12:09,131 --> 02:12:09,964
extraordinary things and people who are 
self congratulatory for no reason drive 

3180
02:12:14,861 --> 02:12:17,470
me fucking insane.
Why are you laughing?

3181
02:12:18,360 --> 02:12:20,240
Congrats.
Oh,

3182
02:12:20,910 --> 02:12:22,530
it's like half joking.
Yeah.

3183
02:12:22,531 --> 02:12:23,300
Oh yeah.
But I.

3184
02:12:23,300 --> 02:12:25,590
But I have a very low threshold for a 
reward.

3185
02:12:28,020 --> 02:12:29,640
It's to drink.
But like,

3186
02:12:29,650 --> 02:12:32,010
and I had,
I think I have like a,

3187
02:12:32,550 --> 02:12:33,383
like I think that's why I'm doing that 
half marathon because I was like I need 

3188
02:12:34,861 --> 02:12:36,900
to start.
I want to start testing myself.

3189
02:12:36,901 --> 02:12:37,734
I want to start saying to myself,
let's break two hours and a half 

3190
02:12:39,721 --> 02:12:40,950
marathon.
Let's see if we can do that.

3191
02:12:42,270 --> 02:12:43,200
But you're right,
there is.

3192
02:12:43,620 --> 02:12:44,453
I think I do that with physical stuff 
because I was an athlete growing up and 

3193
02:12:47,221 --> 02:12:48,054
I just go,
I can,

3194
02:12:48,090 --> 02:12:50,520
I can always jump back in.
But when it comes to stand up,

3195
02:12:50,521 --> 02:12:52,920
man,
I am beyond fucking critical.

3196
02:12:53,010 --> 02:12:55,980
I look at some of these people that put 
out hours and I go like,

3197
02:12:56,250 --> 02:12:57,660
like,
like,

3198
02:12:58,410 --> 02:12:59,870
I'm not going to name names,
but man,

3199
02:13:00,420 --> 02:13:04,020
there's some people that people have 
said like,

3200
02:13:04,021 --> 02:13:05,670
I saw someone who,
I won't say names,

3201
02:13:05,671 --> 02:13:07,980
but they closed their specialist street 
jokes and I was like,

3202
02:13:08,300 --> 02:13:09,530
Nah,
you can't make,

3203
02:13:09,531 --> 02:13:10,920
hey,
you don't have friends.

3204
02:13:10,980 --> 02:13:11,813
I don't know.
Yeah,

3205
02:13:14,090 --> 02:13:16,070
yeah.
This will stay my friend.

3206
02:13:16,071 --> 02:13:17,370
I would have told you don't do that 
shit.

3207
02:13:17,780 --> 02:13:19,640
She wouldn't listen,
but here's the thing man.

3208
02:13:19,641 --> 02:13:22,610
A lot of people that get caught up in 
that other stuff is one of the things we

3209
02:13:22,611 --> 02:13:24,290
were talking about,
like you doing the travel channel.

3210
02:13:24,291 --> 02:13:26,000
Imagine if you're doing movies all the 
time,

3211
02:13:26,280 --> 02:13:26,970
you do one,
two,

3212
02:13:26,970 --> 02:13:28,670
three movies,
year movies.

3213
02:13:28,671 --> 02:13:31,380
You know how that grind is 16 hours a 
day on set.

3214
02:13:31,530 --> 02:13:33,720
You don't have time to hit the clubs.
You don't have time to grind.

3215
02:13:33,721 --> 02:13:36,300
You're not going over your material.
You're going over your lines.

3216
02:13:36,301 --> 02:13:37,134
You're taking naps because you're 
fucking tired all the time because 

3217
02:13:38,400 --> 02:13:41,040
especially if you're not an athlete,
you're not someone who's like really fit

3218
02:13:41,041 --> 02:13:42,780
and healthy and eating really good 
foods.

3219
02:13:43,110 --> 02:13:46,260
Your body is worn the fuck out by the 
time those three,

3220
02:13:46,261 --> 02:13:47,094
four months of filming or done and then 
you have to do press junkets and you 

3221
02:13:50,131 --> 02:13:53,190
have to do that and then someone,
Netflix,

3222
02:13:53,191 --> 02:13:56,430
Hbo comes along and offers you all this 
cash to do a special.

3223
02:13:56,430 --> 02:13:57,300
Can you do it?
Yeah.

3224
02:13:57,450 --> 02:13:59,010
You're not going to say no and by the 
way,

3225
02:13:59,011 --> 02:14:01,050
your agents,
your managers,

3226
02:14:01,440 --> 02:14:04,710
unless they're fucking top of the food 
chain,

3227
02:14:04,740 --> 02:14:09,120
they don't know shit about what it takes
to do standup because they don't do it.

3228
02:14:09,480 --> 02:14:12,540
You have to have a really good manager 
who goes,

3229
02:14:12,541 --> 02:14:13,374
listen,
we really need to manage the time that 

3230
02:14:15,790 --> 02:14:16,623
in the energy and the focus you put on 
your act because you only get one shot 

3231
02:14:19,531 --> 02:14:21,230
at doing this act.
You know,

3232
02:14:21,240 --> 02:14:22,073
and I fucked that up before and I think 
a lot of us have before we've all done 

3233
02:14:25,501 --> 02:14:28,250
sets where we weren't really prepared.
We weren't really.

3234
02:14:28,251 --> 02:14:31,980
And you don't know what,
what it takes until you do it wrong,

3235
02:14:32,130 --> 02:14:36,390
and then you feel the sting of 
mediocrity and then you realize like,

3236
02:14:36,420 --> 02:14:37,253
oh,
there's no substitute for running 200 

3237
02:14:38,401 --> 02:14:40,080
miles.
You have to fucking run everyday.

3238
02:14:40,110 --> 02:14:42,630
There's no substitute.
There's no substitute for stand up.

3239
02:14:42,631 --> 02:14:44,700
You have to fucking grind.
Do you have to grind?

3240
02:14:44,750 --> 02:14:46,880
You've got to watch your sets.
You've got to go through and say,

3241
02:14:46,881 --> 02:14:49,190
where's the lazy writing?
You've got to punch up the good writing.

3242
02:14:49,520 --> 02:14:52,670
That last hour special I did.
I think the one that really helped break

3243
02:14:52,671 --> 02:14:57,671
me to sell tickets and whatnot was was 
me looking at it from the travel channel

3244
02:14:58,491 --> 02:15:01,140
perspective of Lazy.
Just get the work done,

3245
02:15:01,170 --> 02:15:02,870
get it up.
I just get the last.

3246
02:15:02,871 --> 02:15:03,704
I don't give a fuck.
And then going and started hanging out 

3247
02:15:06,710 --> 02:15:08,270
with clubs and going,
Oh,

3248
02:15:08,271 --> 02:15:08,990
I'm,
I'm,

3249
02:15:08,990 --> 02:15:11,570
there's a lot of laziness in this act 
and going,

3250
02:15:11,571 --> 02:15:12,404
I need to.
I need to really be honest with myself 

3251
02:15:14,481 --> 02:15:15,300
and go,
this is,

3252
02:15:15,300 --> 02:15:16,970
this is hacky.
Like this is.

3253
02:15:17,150 --> 02:15:19,400
I'm not doing the work in the special.

3254
02:15:19,590 --> 02:15:22,320
I think that applies to everybody that 
does everything.

3255
02:15:22,610 --> 02:15:25,440
It's not just to our creative endeavor 
of standup comedy,

3256
02:15:25,830 --> 02:15:28,520
but if you are whatever you're doing,
if you're a fucking engineer,

3257
02:15:28,530 --> 02:15:30,420
if you're a chef,
whatever it is,

3258
02:15:30,720 --> 02:15:33,630
whatever you're doing,
where you focus on and it gets good.

3259
02:15:33,810 --> 02:15:35,910
If you focus more on it,
it'll get great.

3260
02:15:36,150 --> 02:15:36,983
I mean it's,
it's just you have to figure out what's 

3261
02:15:38,251 --> 02:15:40,170
missing in it.
Where's the weak spots,

3262
02:15:40,171 --> 02:15:42,390
where's the holes,
what could be done better?

3263
02:15:42,510 --> 02:15:44,370
Approach it from a different angle.
You know,

3264
02:15:44,371 --> 02:15:45,780
one of the things that I'll do and I've 
been.

3265
02:15:45,810 --> 02:15:48,780
This is a thing that I've been doing a 
lot over the last two years.

3266
02:15:49,080 --> 02:15:51,720
I'll take a bit that I know is killing.
It's doing well.

3267
02:15:52,020 --> 02:15:54,180
I'll take that bit.
I know it's done.

3268
02:15:54,390 --> 02:15:58,770
So now I look at the same subject with 
open eyes,

3269
02:15:59,160 --> 02:16:01,950
like completely fresh eyes and then I 
try to rewrite it.

3270
02:16:02,370 --> 02:16:05,490
I try to rewrite the bit.
I've tried to write the bit almost as if

3271
02:16:05,491 --> 02:16:06,324
I don't even know how the other big 
goals and I write a new version of it 

3272
02:16:09,090 --> 02:16:10,770
and sometimes when I write a new version
of it,

3273
02:16:10,771 --> 02:16:11,604
I'll have a whole new take that I can 
add to the first version and the only 

3274
02:16:14,701 --> 02:16:16,710
way you do that as if you're not 
complacent.

3275
02:16:16,740 --> 02:16:17,573
The only way you're willing to do that 
as if you fucking hate yourself and you 

3276
02:16:20,430 --> 02:16:21,990
want to just grind it out all the time.

3277
02:16:22,540 --> 02:16:25,860
Yeah.
Either or this hour I'm working on now.

3278
02:16:26,400 --> 02:16:27,390
Um,
I,

3279
02:16:28,830 --> 02:16:29,960
I feel like,
uh,

3280
02:16:30,760 --> 02:16:32,890
I feel like I've forgotten too 
meticulous with it.

3281
02:16:32,891 --> 02:16:34,300
Like I've gotten to the point where I 
go,

3282
02:16:34,690 --> 02:16:36,770
every job needs to have closure because 
I'm doing more.

3283
02:16:36,840 --> 02:16:37,673
I'm really doing more stories.
I'm not like doing more like premise 

3284
02:16:40,510 --> 02:16:43,180
joe.
I'm doing legit like story.

3285
02:16:43,240 --> 02:16:44,290
That's what you like to do,
right?

3286
02:16:44,530 --> 02:16:45,490
Yeah.
Well,

3287
02:16:45,491 --> 02:16:47,440
you know what I have to credit already 
on,

3288
02:16:47,441 --> 02:16:50,140
this is a,
I didn't realize I was doing,

3289
02:16:50,500 --> 02:16:52,240
I was doing like material,
you know,

3290
02:16:52,241 --> 02:16:52,531
like,
hey,

3291
02:16:52,531 --> 02:16:54,820
if you ever put a vegetable in your 
chick's house,

3292
02:16:54,821 --> 02:16:56,820
make sure to use a carrot and cucumber,
cucumber,

3293
02:16:57,200 --> 02:16:58,250
you know,
like those kinds of like,

3294
02:16:58,420 --> 02:17:02,020
fun boy party stuff,
a mediocre man comedy at best.

3295
02:17:02,021 --> 02:17:03,700
And I think it was the first one there 
was like,

3296
02:17:03,701 --> 02:17:05,470
dude,
your stories are really good.

3297
02:17:05,800 --> 02:17:09,130
And we started talking about when he was
doing started doing this not happening.

3298
02:17:09,131 --> 02:17:11,650
We started talking about stories and I 
was like,

3299
02:17:11,651 --> 02:17:12,371
yeah,
I got really into it.

3300
02:17:12,371 --> 02:17:12,761
And was like,
yeah,

3301
02:17:12,761 --> 02:17:16,000
I'm much better at stories than trying 
to do what everyone else is doing,

3302
02:17:16,300 --> 02:17:19,960
if I can do my shit and just be me that 
like I felt like I was.

3303
02:17:20,220 --> 02:17:23,230
People were stealing material from me.
So I do a premise and I was like,

3304
02:17:23,820 --> 02:17:25,150
it's,
it's common ground.

3305
02:17:25,151 --> 02:17:27,330
Like get pulled over by a cop or you 
know,

3306
02:17:27,331 --> 02:17:27,851
those.
It's like,

3307
02:17:27,851 --> 02:17:29,630
who's stealing material from you?
Well,

3308
02:17:29,720 --> 02:17:31,150
you know,
I'm not getting into this.

3309
02:17:31,590 --> 02:17:32,520
So,
uh,

3310
02:17:33,780 --> 02:17:36,640
but you get into stuff and you're like,
and then I was like,

3311
02:17:36,641 --> 02:17:37,360
oh,
these,

3312
02:17:37,360 --> 02:17:38,193
these stories about me,
like the machines story taught me so 

3313
02:17:40,811 --> 02:17:44,530
fucking much.
Like I remember I've said this a million

3314
02:17:44,531 --> 02:17:46,060
times too.
I'll say it a million times more.

3315
02:17:46,900 --> 02:17:49,040
I did this podcast and you were like,
that's your store.

3316
02:17:49,041 --> 02:17:51,190
That's your closer.
You need to fucking figure that out.

3317
02:17:51,580 --> 02:17:52,413
And I went to Columbus,
Ohio that first time I was at that next 

3318
02:17:55,661 --> 02:17:57,370
weekend,
there was a kid in the front rows,

3319
02:17:57,380 --> 02:17:58,360
I can tell the machine.
Right?

3320
02:17:58,361 --> 02:17:59,410
And I was like,
no,

3321
02:17:59,411 --> 02:18:00,131
it's not.
And he's like,

3322
02:18:00,131 --> 02:18:01,030
Rogan said,
you should tell it.

3323
02:18:01,031 --> 02:18:01,864
Bert.
Bert,

3324
02:18:01,900 --> 02:18:04,090
we understand it won't be good.
That's okay.

3325
02:18:04,600 --> 02:18:06,700
I remember being like,
oh these are the fans I get like,

3326
02:18:06,760 --> 02:18:07,593
okay.
But I learned so much at a telling that 

3327
02:18:09,431 --> 02:18:12,550
story about how to write stories and how
to do stories.

3328
02:18:12,551 --> 02:18:13,830
And I think,
you know,

3329
02:18:13,831 --> 02:18:14,664
when people come see my show,
they want to have a good time and they 

3330
02:18:16,031 --> 02:18:18,100
don't want to hear my view on fucking 
feminism.

3331
02:18:18,540 --> 02:18:19,373
They don't even.
Last year view on feminism is really 

3332
02:18:20,501 --> 02:18:21,040
funny.
Yeah.

3333
02:18:21,040 --> 02:18:23,570
Unless it's funny even you feel.
Yeah,

3334
02:18:23,760 --> 02:18:24,593
but like,
like if you feel like saying so many 

3335
02:18:25,751 --> 02:18:29,060
comics right now are so like a lot of 
liberal comics are like,

3336
02:18:29,350 --> 02:18:31,330
agenda first,
comedy second.

3337
02:18:31,960 --> 02:18:32,480
And I'm like,
no,

3338
02:18:32,480 --> 02:18:33,313
I'm not that guy.
I'm not going to push that agenda on 

3339
02:18:34,901 --> 02:18:35,734
you.
I'm just going to make sure you have a 

3340
02:18:35,861 --> 02:18:37,750
good time to tell you.
By the time I got fucked up,

3341
02:18:37,751 --> 02:18:39,540
I pissed on the table.
I'd fucking frogger.

3342
02:18:39,550 --> 02:18:40,130
Train

3343
02:18:40,130 --> 02:18:43,730
what ever your agenda is.
It happens to be hilarious.

3344
02:18:43,731 --> 02:18:45,050
Like it's got to be organic.
Right.

3345
02:18:45,051 --> 02:18:46,300
And that's,
you know,

3346
02:18:46,310 --> 02:18:49,220
I mean I don't think you should put 
yourself in any sort of a box.

3347
02:18:49,221 --> 02:18:49,810
Yeah,

3348
02:18:49,810 --> 02:18:50,280
I,
I,

3349
02:18:50,280 --> 02:18:53,320
I feel like I feel like if it,
if I like it,

3350
02:18:53,920 --> 02:18:54,970
I'll do it.
Yeah.

3351
02:18:55,210 --> 02:18:58,750
But then I this bit about cat calling 
that I thought it was so fucking good,

3352
02:18:59,120 --> 02:19:00,850
but I was like,
I was like,

3353
02:19:00,851 --> 02:19:02,230
well,
what are you doing to it?

3354
02:19:02,430 --> 02:19:04,200
If you like it,
don't worry about it,

3355
02:19:04,201 --> 02:19:05,500
man.
You can't box yourself.

3356
02:19:05,560 --> 02:19:07,320
Like you remember won a Tony 
Hinchcliffe.

3357
02:19:07,350 --> 02:19:10,170
Ex-Girlfriend's was like,
I think Tony should be all dark.

3358
02:19:10,770 --> 02:19:11,603
What I think,
I think you should just stick to all 

3359
02:19:14,641 --> 02:19:16,770
dark and I have a,
what the fuck are you talking about?

3360
02:19:16,771 --> 02:19:18,960
Why would he do that?
How about just be funny all the time.

3361
02:19:19,230 --> 02:19:20,580
And then I had to talk to him about.
He was like,

3362
02:19:20,581 --> 02:19:22,500
oh,
she hates my bit about squirting.

3363
02:19:23,180 --> 02:19:28,180
Like she didn't.
The fact that he was doing

3364
02:19:28,190 --> 02:19:29,023
sexual jokes,
she was trying to like give him some 

3365
02:19:32,871 --> 02:19:35,690
really shit advice.
Like he should be all dark.

3366
02:19:36,030 --> 02:19:39,260
She's been moody and dark.
The fuck.

3367
02:19:39,660 --> 02:19:40,493
It's like when you say

3368
02:19:40,770 --> 02:19:42,880
in a green room and then you and your 
toe,

3369
02:19:42,920 --> 02:19:43,753
you don't know one of the comics.
Then he gets up and leaves another 

3370
02:19:45,210 --> 02:19:46,020
common goes,
Oh,

3371
02:19:46,020 --> 02:19:47,410
just so you know his dad's gay and 
you're like,

3372
02:19:50,350 --> 02:19:51,183
you're like,
why wouldn't you tell me that in the 

3373
02:19:53,720 --> 02:19:54,070
middle of it?
He was like,

3374
02:19:54,070 --> 02:19:56,030
I wouldn't see where you took it.
When you go places,

3375
02:19:56,031 --> 02:19:57,620
do you get like a crowd in the green 
room?

3376
02:19:57,621 --> 02:19:59,750
Like weird guys show up?
Like yeah,

3377
02:19:59,840 --> 02:20:01,640
that's not good.
Yeah.

3378
02:20:01,910 --> 02:20:02,743
And they always want to like reach into 
the fucking cooler and grab beers and 

3379
02:20:05,571 --> 02:20:07,580
talk too much.
Oh yeah.

3380
02:20:07,670 --> 02:20:10,430
Oh Dude.
Nine slash computation problems.

3381
02:20:10,490 --> 02:20:14,420
So I just would just leave myself a 
green room.

3382
02:20:14,450 --> 02:20:18,650
I've had that a number of times.
That's the worst man when you show up on

3383
02:20:18,651 --> 02:20:21,680
the road and like the green room becomes
like a hangout.

3384
02:20:21,740 --> 02:20:22,730
Hey,
this is my buddy.

3385
02:20:22,940 --> 02:20:25,020
He's a big fan and this is his 
girlfriend.

3386
02:20:25,021 --> 02:20:25,550
They're going to.

3387
02:20:25,550 --> 02:20:26,520
Okay,
let me ask you a question.

3388
02:20:26,521 --> 02:20:27,480
How do you write your jokes?

3389
02:20:29,670 --> 02:20:30,730
Just happened so much

3390
02:20:31,330 --> 02:20:32,590
material.
You know,

3391
02:20:32,591 --> 02:20:33,424
it's funny,
I've been thinking about doing standup 

3392
02:20:34,441 --> 02:20:35,274
for a while because a lot of people 
weren't telling me I'm really funny and 

3393
02:20:36,971 --> 02:20:37,751
uh,
you know,

3394
02:20:37,751 --> 02:20:38,890
I mean,
I watched you and I go,

3395
02:20:38,891 --> 02:20:39,850
hey,
maybe I can do it.

3396
02:20:41,610 --> 02:20:44,550
I get the thing I get the most is uh,
people in the meet and greet line going,

3397
02:20:44,670 --> 02:20:46,560
ah,
I've got to tell you my machine story.

3398
02:20:47,530 --> 02:20:50,990
I'm in.
There's a hundred 50 people behind you,

3399
02:20:50,991 --> 02:20:51,920
sir.

3400
02:20:52,080 --> 02:20:54,330
Oh,
I get these long ones.

3401
02:20:54,331 --> 02:20:55,650
I,
these ids lesbians,

3402
02:20:56,010 --> 02:20:58,320
we wouldn't stop playing with my Dick.
Nice.

3403
02:20:58,590 --> 02:21:01,130
I didn't mind that we're doing the 
picture.

3404
02:21:01,131 --> 02:21:02,580
As long as they're lesbians,
you're barely counts.

3405
02:21:02,610 --> 02:21:03,460
Good girls like,
uh,

3406
02:21:03,461 --> 02:21:05,680
I haven't felt a dick in a while and was
doing a picture.

3407
02:21:05,681 --> 02:21:08,310
I used to be a.
She used to be a non lesbian.

3408
02:21:08,460 --> 02:21:09,690
Yeah,
she used to be a breeder.

3409
02:21:10,080 --> 02:21:11,700
What happened?
Why don't you go to the dark side?

3410
02:21:12,060 --> 02:21:14,760
Did you ask her a job?
She got me hard.

3411
02:21:15,880 --> 02:21:18,930
He wouldn't have stopped doing.
She definitely did.

3412
02:21:19,050 --> 02:21:20,700
Dirty girl,
terrible girl.

3413
02:21:21,230 --> 02:21:22,470
I love that.
When you find someone who's like,

3414
02:21:22,500 --> 02:21:24,030
who pose power,
sexuality,

3415
02:21:24,300 --> 02:21:25,350
like there was a girl one time.
It's like,

3416
02:21:25,351 --> 02:21:25,831
Hey,
can I,

3417
02:21:25,831 --> 02:21:26,910
uh,
like people always go,

3418
02:21:26,911 --> 02:21:27,890
hey,
can I go?

3419
02:21:27,891 --> 02:21:29,120
Can I pinch your nipple?
And the pictures,

3420
02:21:29,130 --> 02:21:30,240
my shirts off.
I go,

3421
02:21:30,241 --> 02:21:30,631
Oh yeah,
yeah,

3422
02:21:30,631 --> 02:21:32,190
whatever.
This one girl goes,

3423
02:21:32,191 --> 02:21:32,911
hey,
coupled with the nipple.

3424
02:21:32,911 --> 02:21:33,610
And I was like,
yeah,

3425
02:21:33,610 --> 02:21:38,580
she did some sex stuff to my nipple that
I literally knocked my wind out of me.

3426
02:21:38,581 --> 02:21:41,310
I went home and then I was like,
Hey,

3427
02:21:41,311 --> 02:21:43,170
can you tell me how you did it?
So I can tell that to my wife.

3428
02:21:43,171 --> 02:21:44,340
Like,
that was fucking amazing.

3429
02:21:45,170 --> 02:21:46,670
You're slammed my nipple in a bank 
vault.

3430
02:21:46,671 --> 02:21:51,530
I don't feel shit useless.
They don't work.

3431
02:21:51,760 --> 02:21:54,780
Don't work.
Goddamn things.

3432
02:21:56,450 --> 02:21:58,600
Delegate elbow,
that's what it's like.

3433
02:21:59,020 --> 02:22:02,180
It's like Balsa simpler.
Very similar to an elbow.

3434
02:22:02,210 --> 02:22:02,940
I Dunno,
man.

3435
02:22:02,940 --> 02:22:04,200
Ball sack.
I couldn't like.

3436
02:22:04,250 --> 02:22:05,610
You could pinch my ball sack with 
buyers.

3437
02:22:05,611 --> 02:22:06,444
I wouldn't feel it.

3438
02:22:07,290 --> 02:22:08,820
Yeah.
The skin's not very sensitive,

3439
02:22:08,821 --> 02:22:10,290
but it is.
When they go like this,

3440
02:22:10,291 --> 02:22:12,210
right?
When they tickle my go right up in me,

3441
02:22:13,110 --> 02:22:14,240
they suck up.
Oh yeah.

3442
02:22:14,400 --> 02:22:16,440
Really liked like a witchy.
Roommaster.

3443
02:22:16,470 --> 02:22:17,303
Like if someone gets what they would do,
they would suck their balls up into 

3444
02:22:20,191 --> 02:22:22,640
their bodies so you can kick them in the
knots and it doesn't even hurt.

3445
02:22:23,550 --> 02:22:24,810
Really know,
Oh,

3446
02:22:25,750 --> 02:22:26,010
did

3447
02:22:26,010 --> 02:22:26,843
those fucking idiots.
But there are a bunch of guys that get 

3448
02:22:28,641 --> 02:22:30,920
kicked in the balls and they somehow or 
another can endure it.

3449
02:22:31,850 --> 02:22:32,571
Oh,
we did a.

3450
02:22:32,571 --> 02:22:33,404
We had a,
we had a bid on a TV show where there 

3451
02:22:34,431 --> 02:22:36,410
was a strap.
You put diversity.

3452
02:22:36,460 --> 02:22:39,950
This now it looks like a seatbelt,
but it goes around and conquer it.

3453
02:22:39,951 --> 02:22:40,784
Goes knows for some spike show.
It goes around your feet and then it 

3454
02:22:43,671 --> 02:22:46,820
rides your inseam.
So it looks like a seatbelt,

3455
02:22:47,060 --> 02:22:50,360
but it's.
It's an inch shorter than your inseam.

3456
02:22:50,361 --> 02:22:53,360
So theoretically when you kick it,
your foot,

3457
02:22:53,361 --> 02:22:55,640
the foot strap stops the foot before 
history balls.

3458
02:22:55,690 --> 02:22:57,080
Okay.
So does that make sense?

3459
02:22:57,140 --> 02:22:59,060
Yes.
So imagine if you had really,

3460
02:22:59,061 --> 02:22:59,894
really strong inseams and you couldn't 
get to the balls because the ncm didn't 

3461
02:23:02,301 --> 02:23:03,470
move because you're strapped on your 
feet.

3462
02:23:03,920 --> 02:23:08,920
So we get a punter and a professional 
punter and the whole gag is.

3463
02:23:09,141 --> 02:23:10,550
If I get it,
I'll get kicked in the balls.

3464
02:23:10,551 --> 02:23:12,620
But I got this.
This is what I got the strap on a fine,

3465
02:23:12,621 --> 02:23:13,310
right?
Right.

3466
02:23:13,310 --> 02:23:14,880
So I'm like,
alright,

3467
02:23:14,960 --> 02:23:17,180
I got kicked in the balls so I'm 
standing like this.

3468
02:23:17,330 --> 02:23:18,163
But as he goes to kick,
I squat down and I then loosen the 

3469
02:23:20,391 --> 02:23:24,680
tension and then I got kicked in the 
balls by a pro uponor oh my.

3470
02:23:25,200 --> 02:23:30,140
I went down and you could lose a ball 
from that man very easily.

3471
02:23:30,260 --> 02:23:30,890
I know a couple.

3472
02:23:30,890 --> 02:23:33,170
Well guys have lost a ball.
A couple.

3473
02:23:33,920 --> 02:23:36,230
Yeah.
They get kicked in the nuts and sparring

3474
02:23:36,470 --> 02:23:38,780
and they lose a nut.
I thought I lost it.

3475
02:23:38,781 --> 02:23:39,614
Not once in a tournament.
My Ball swole up like a fucking golf 

3476
02:23:41,931 --> 02:23:44,430
ball.
It was more of a golf ball,

3477
02:23:44,450 --> 02:23:45,283
I guess it was.
It was big and bread and it turned 

3478
02:23:48,261 --> 02:23:49,460
purple later.
Oh,

3479
02:23:49,480 --> 02:23:50,720
it was awful.
Yeah.

3480
02:23:50,721 --> 02:23:51,554
I really thought like,
because I had in the old days the cups 

3481
02:23:54,051 --> 02:23:54,884
that you would have where like they were
cops that would sit in jockstraps and 

3482
02:23:59,331 --> 02:24:00,164
when you would throw a kick like a lot 
of times the ball would like poke out 

3483
02:24:03,561 --> 02:24:06,290
from underneath the cup.
So when you get kicked in the nuts,

3484
02:24:06,500 --> 02:24:10,130
that cup was slamming into your balls.
It's not good.

3485
02:24:10,470 --> 02:24:12,530
Now.
They have really good compression shorts

3486
02:24:12,531 --> 02:24:16,160
and the balls get received is a thing 
called diamond mma cups.

3487
02:24:16,161 --> 02:24:16,994
They looked like they suck straight to 
your body and the outside soft and they 

3488
02:24:19,641 --> 02:24:22,370
cover all your junk and it doesn't go 
anywhere.

3489
02:24:22,371 --> 02:24:24,920
You could literally get kicked in the 
balls these things on and be okay.

3490
02:24:25,400 --> 02:24:28,790
Then they had these steel tie cups which
are the most ideal,

3491
02:24:29,030 --> 02:24:31,220
most uncomfortable,
but the most ideal because they,

3492
02:24:31,221 --> 02:24:33,860
they tie up through your asshole like a 
g string,

3493
02:24:34,120 --> 02:24:36,330
like fucking crank up back there time 
and I thought,

3494
02:24:36,350 --> 02:24:37,850
but it's a steel cup.
Really.

3495
02:24:37,890 --> 02:24:40,070
Everything is just fucking shoved in 
there,

3496
02:24:40,071 --> 02:24:40,580
man.

3497
02:24:40,580 --> 02:24:41,413
I remember when I was a kid and they 
just pulled a cup out of the out of the 

3498
02:24:43,191 --> 02:24:46,580
bag and it by itself and go throw it in 
your underwear.

3499
02:24:46,640 --> 02:24:47,473
Oh yeah.
They do that and you'd have to raw dog 

3500
02:24:48,771 --> 02:24:53,120
the cup in your underwear.
Just sand all of your Dick.

3501
02:24:53,690 --> 02:24:57,580
But designed balls are on the outside.
Right.

3502
02:24:57,680 --> 02:25:00,470
And everybody knows it.
Everybody knows how bad they hurt.

3503
02:25:00,471 --> 02:25:02,540
Like this is not the thing that hurts 
other than your eyeballs.

3504
02:25:02,840 --> 02:25:05,900
Things that hurts like your balls.
Everything ball hurts.

3505
02:25:06,530 --> 02:25:07,760
Right.
Then your ipod,

3506
02:25:08,120 --> 02:25:10,590
was he ever been posting the Iheart?
Horrible,

3507
02:25:10,591 --> 02:25:12,630
right?
Fuck yeah.

3508
02:25:12,910 --> 02:25:14,250
That's.
That's your balls man.

3509
02:25:15,120 --> 02:25:16,890
I said to someone one time,
we were about to do this,

3510
02:25:16,891 --> 02:25:19,380
a snowball fight for professional stobo 
fight.

3511
02:25:19,590 --> 02:25:23,820
So they make them with snow pack them 
and they're basically ice rocks and it's

3512
02:25:23,860 --> 02:25:27,640
called Yukigassen in Alaska and so we're
about to do it.

3513
02:25:27,850 --> 02:25:29,560
And I.
The night before I had said to someone,

3514
02:25:29,920 --> 02:25:31,860
I don't like you can hit me on the deck.
It was.

3515
02:25:31,900 --> 02:25:33,760
I'd rather be hitting the dick then in 
the balls.

3516
02:25:34,060 --> 02:25:35,510
And they're like,
and there's this girl,

3517
02:25:35,610 --> 02:25:37,750
and she was like,
you're telling me you have no feeling in

3518
02:25:37,751 --> 02:25:38,171
your neck?
I go,

3519
02:25:38,171 --> 02:25:38,981
no,
I feel in my Dick.

3520
02:25:38,981 --> 02:25:42,220
But like if you punch me in the deck,
like just deck,

3521
02:25:42,221 --> 02:25:45,460
if you holding my dig my hand a punch,
me I wouldn't hurt as bad as if you held

3522
02:25:45,461 --> 02:25:46,660
my balls,
my hand punched me.

3523
02:25:47,110 --> 02:25:47,943
So the next day we're doing.
This year he is somewhat of a snowball 

3524
02:25:50,051 --> 02:25:52,900
right when it starts and it hits me on 
the head of the day.

3525
02:25:52,960 --> 02:25:55,870
Dick.
And I thought it exploded in my pants.

3526
02:25:55,960 --> 02:25:59,290
I thought when I and my hands were cold 
so I couldn't feel.

3527
02:25:59,710 --> 02:26:01,270
I was like,
when I touch this dick,

3528
02:26:01,300 --> 02:26:06,300
it will be in pieces like a trick cigar 
and it hurt.

3529
02:26:06,641 --> 02:26:09,250
I've never felt a pain.
And then she came up as I'm riding,

3530
02:26:09,251 --> 02:26:10,084
she goes,
I thought I could punch you in the Dick 

3531
02:26:11,081 --> 02:26:11,980
and it wouldn't hurt.
And I was like,

3532
02:26:12,480 --> 02:26:16,300
well what about animals?
Like animals all have their balls in the

3533
02:26:16,301 --> 02:26:17,920
outside world.
They've never figured it out.

3534
02:26:18,280 --> 02:26:19,870
Like I think chimps probably figured it 
out.

3535
02:26:19,871 --> 02:26:20,704
I bet they when they fight other chimps,
they attack the balls because I know 

3536
02:26:23,081 --> 02:26:25,000
they do that with people.
When chimps attack people,

3537
02:26:25,001 --> 02:26:27,280
they rip your Dick off and then bite 
your fingers off,

3538
02:26:27,290 --> 02:26:28,990
right,
your fingers off and rip your Dick off.

3539
02:26:28,991 --> 02:26:30,970
They pull your eyes out.
It's one of the things they do.

3540
02:26:30,971 --> 02:26:33,280
They know what to attack.
They're not trying to kill you.

3541
02:26:33,281 --> 02:26:34,091
They're trying to.
Maine.

3542
02:26:34,091 --> 02:26:37,090
You try to take away what you need and 
want.

3543
02:26:38,690 --> 02:26:39,850
Bruce was little animals

3544
02:26:39,930 --> 02:26:43,340
I did a podcast with and the other day 
and I go and I just,

3545
02:26:43,350 --> 02:26:46,050
I love the way his brain works and the 
first things out of his mouth.

3546
02:26:46,230 --> 02:26:49,440
Have you ever seen a hairless chimp?
As I know,

3547
02:26:49,710 --> 02:26:50,543
and he pulls it up and I'm like,
he's like the woman was bathing with 

3548
02:26:53,041 --> 02:26:54,060
that thing.
Bathing.

3549
02:26:54,190 --> 02:26:55,200
Like sleeping with him.

3550
02:26:55,340 --> 02:26:56,180
Yeah,
having sex with it.

3551
02:26:56,181 --> 02:26:57,140
Most likely.
Oh,

3552
02:26:57,141 --> 02:26:57,951
hi too.
She,

3553
02:26:57,951 --> 02:26:59,840
yeah.
She would just give the chimp xanax.

3554
02:27:00,650 --> 02:27:02,450
Yeah.
She gave him a xanax and red wine.

3555
02:27:02,480 --> 02:27:04,760
The one that tore that lady's face off 
in Connecticut.

3556
02:27:04,770 --> 02:27:06,560
She was giving him xanax and red wine.
Yeah.

3557
02:27:06,650 --> 02:27:08,570
Look at the muscles on that thing.
Blocking.

3558
02:27:08,600 --> 02:27:11,780
Not only that,
the problem is we look at that and go,

3559
02:27:11,781 --> 02:27:12,890
oh yeah,
that's like a bodybuilder.

3560
02:27:12,910 --> 02:27:13,191
No,
no,

3561
02:27:13,191 --> 02:27:14,810
no.
That's a chimpanzee.

3562
02:27:15,020 --> 02:27:17,420
Like those muscles are like courted 
steel.

3563
02:27:17,450 --> 02:27:20,690
They might be the same size as a 
bodybuilders muscles,

3564
02:27:21,050 --> 02:27:25,100
but the density of those muscles is off 
the fucking charts.

3565
02:27:25,400 --> 02:27:28,010
Look at those arms.
Oh Dude,

3566
02:27:28,070 --> 02:27:28,903
believe me,
I've spent years of my life staring at 

3567
02:27:31,131 --> 02:27:34,490
naked chimps,
but that's the chimp would mange.

3568
02:27:34,540 --> 02:27:36,830
That's what that is there some sort of a
disease,

3569
02:27:36,831 --> 02:27:39,170
whereas hair falls off where you really 
see their anatomy.

3570
02:27:39,860 --> 02:27:40,693
Yeah.
It's a stunning difference between them 

3571
02:27:41,991 --> 02:27:42,680
and us.
I mean,

3572
02:27:42,680 --> 02:27:45,770
there's a lot of similarities,
but what's really,

3573
02:27:45,771 --> 02:27:48,530
really interesting is that that is an 
intelligent animal.

3574
02:27:48,770 --> 02:27:51,540
I mean,
it's an intelligent animal that now uses

3575
02:27:51,560 --> 02:27:52,393
tools,
so much so that anthropologists are now 

3576
02:27:55,281 --> 02:27:57,680
thinking that,
or biologists rather.

3577
02:27:57,810 --> 02:27:58,643
What would it be?
What would it be that studies chimps 

3578
02:28:04,120 --> 02:28:06,470
don't know.
Definitely as anyway,

3579
02:28:06,500 --> 02:28:09,390
whoever the fuck studies chimps,
they have A.

3580
02:28:09,770 --> 02:28:10,603
I think they've universally concluded 
that chimpanzees have entered the stone 

3581
02:28:14,331 --> 02:28:15,164
age,
so they are using tools without being 

3582
02:28:18,201 --> 02:28:21,050
taught so by other chimps.
Um,

3583
02:28:21,170 --> 02:28:21,980
they're using tools

3584
02:28:21,980 --> 02:28:22,813
independently and they're using tools 
constantly and they using all kinds of 

3585
02:28:25,911 --> 02:28:26,744
different tools and so they think that 
what's going to happen is eventually 

3586
02:28:29,871 --> 02:28:30,704
they're going to figure out a lot of 
other stuff and it could take hundreds 

3587
02:28:32,361 --> 02:28:34,730
of thousands of years,
but chimpanzees,

3588
02:28:34,731 --> 02:28:36,110
literally,
chimpanzees,

3589
02:28:36,180 --> 02:28:37,790
monkeys have entered the stone age.
I mean,

3590
02:28:37,791 --> 02:28:38,624
this is from the BBC.
They're using rocks and tools and 

3591
02:28:42,261 --> 02:28:45,020
they're cutting things and breaking 
things open with tools.

3592
02:28:45,920 --> 02:28:48,820
And C would say it's not the 
worksmanship,

3593
02:28:48,870 --> 02:28:50,930
uh,
that makes them special.

3594
02:28:51,260 --> 02:28:53,480
If anything,
a casual observer might struggle to even

3595
02:28:53,481 --> 02:28:54,314
identify them as ancient tools.
It's not their antiquity that's 

3596
02:28:57,081 --> 02:28:57,914
exceptional either.
They're only about the same age as the 

3597
02:29:00,561 --> 02:29:01,394
Egyptian periods.
What makes these tools noteworthy is at 

3598
02:29:03,421 --> 02:29:06,230
the t,
the hands that held them weren't human.

3599
02:29:06,560 --> 02:29:09,200
These stone tools were wielded by 
chimpanzees.

3600
02:29:09,201 --> 02:29:11,900
Competence and macaques.
How do you say that?

3601
02:29:12,470 --> 02:29:13,850
Macaques.
Hightails monkeys,

3602
02:29:15,140 --> 02:29:18,290
but I thought that's a bird.
Anyway,

3603
02:29:18,680 --> 02:29:19,513
monkeys,
I'm the sites where they have been 

3604
02:29:21,261 --> 02:29:24,140
unearthed or the basis of the brand new 
field of science,

3605
02:29:24,141 --> 02:29:28,490
primate archaeology.
So what they're saying now is,

3606
02:29:28,850 --> 02:29:30,290
if you think about human beings,
right?

3607
02:29:30,291 --> 02:29:33,500
That one point in the history of human 
beings,

3608
02:29:33,900 --> 02:29:34,733
uh,
we were far more primitive than we are 

3609
02:29:37,131 --> 02:29:37,821
now,
right?

3610
02:29:37,821 --> 02:29:41,330
If you go back and if you're one of 
those people believing the illusion,

3611
02:29:41,870 --> 02:29:43,920
if you go all the way back,
you know,

3612
02:29:43,940 --> 02:29:45,590
we were some sort of,
um,

3613
02:29:45,680 --> 02:29:46,880
Australia pithy,
right?

3614
02:29:46,881 --> 02:29:47,714
It's like some sort of a chimpanzee like
humanoid thing and that we got more and 

3615
02:29:52,701 --> 02:29:56,450
more intelligent for whatever reasons.
And over the period of 2 million years,

3616
02:29:56,451 --> 02:29:57,284
the human brain size doubled and they 
think that hunting may played a part of 

3617
02:30:01,161 --> 02:30:03,220
that cooking food might've played a part
in that,

3618
02:30:03,230 --> 02:30:04,820
have a bunch of factors,
played a part in that,

3619
02:30:05,660 --> 02:30:09,560
but they think that if chimpanzees keep 
going the way they're going,

3620
02:30:09,561 --> 02:30:14,390
now that who knows what the fuck a chimp
looks like in a million years.

3621
02:30:14,780 --> 02:30:15,613
I mean,
it's entirely possible that they could 

3622
02:30:17,031 --> 02:30:20,510
grow to be a new type of 
superintelligent primary.

3623
02:30:20,540 --> 02:30:21,680
Wow.
Yeah.

3624
02:30:21,710 --> 02:30:22,251
I mean,
look,

3625
02:30:22,251 --> 02:30:23,330
it was us,
right?

3626
02:30:23,331 --> 02:30:27,080
If you believe evolution,
obviously I do,

3627
02:30:27,140 --> 02:30:27,973
but if you believe scientists the most 
studied in the field believe that human 

3628
02:30:32,271 --> 02:30:33,104
beings in this forum,
we've existed in this forum for 

3629
02:30:35,510 --> 02:30:38,750
somewhere in the neighborhood of half a 
million years plus,

3630
02:30:38,810 --> 02:30:41,030
right?
I don't know if that's the right number,

3631
02:30:41,031 --> 02:30:43,970
but it's some.
I think it varies back and forth,

3632
02:30:44,330 --> 02:30:49,330
but who knows how many hundreds of 
thousands of years before that we looked

3633
02:30:50,211 --> 02:30:52,490
exactly like these motherfuckers.
I mean,

3634
02:30:52,730 --> 02:30:57,260
we've been around relatively recently.
I mean if you look at the history of the

3635
02:30:57,261 --> 02:30:59,210
human race versus the history of the 
world,

3636
02:30:59,211 --> 02:31:01,070
the world is like four and a half 
billion years old.

3637
02:31:01,400 --> 02:31:03,350
The humans haven't even been around a 
million years.

3638
02:31:03,351 --> 02:31:04,184
I don't think that's crazy.
So it's four and a half thousand 

3639
02:31:08,991 --> 02:31:11,360
dollars,
million years old for the,

3640
02:31:11,450 --> 02:31:14,330
for the earth.
Humans less than a million.

3641
02:31:14,780 --> 02:31:16,280
So we're fucking.
We're recent.

3642
02:31:16,880 --> 02:31:21,690
Recent people are recent things that 
have figured out how to radically change

3643
02:31:21,691 --> 02:31:25,830
our environment with tools.
So now these things have figured out how

3644
02:31:25,831 --> 02:31:26,664
to start using tools on a regular basis.
So this is what happened with us 

3645
02:31:31,410 --> 02:31:33,240
millions of years ago or whatever it 
was,

3646
02:31:33,720 --> 02:31:37,050
and this is what's happening with them.
And this is fairly recent.

3647
02:31:38,220 --> 02:31:43,220
We have now recovered buried stone tools
from activity areas of the stone tool of

3648
02:31:43,321 --> 02:31:46,970
all the stone tool using primates.
Ooh,

3649
02:31:46,980 --> 02:31:47,670
it's going to be weird,

3650
02:31:47,670 --> 02:31:48,503
man.
I still can't understand how they can 

3651
02:31:50,051 --> 02:31:52,480
teach them sign language and talked to 
them crazy,

3652
02:31:52,860 --> 02:31:55,210
but had it like crazy.

3653
02:31:55,800 --> 02:31:56,610
Yeah.
Um,

3654
02:31:56,610 --> 02:31:57,530
he,
you know,

3655
02:31:57,600 --> 02:32:02,600
humans have a very weird relationship 
with primates to it's we,

3656
02:32:03,060 --> 02:32:03,660
you know,
we,

3657
02:32:03,660 --> 02:32:06,190
we expect them to be pets.
You know,

3658
02:32:06,210 --> 02:32:07,043
that's what this crazy lady in 
Connecticut where a friend got her face 

3659
02:32:09,001 --> 02:32:11,070
ripped off.
That's what they thought.

3660
02:32:11,400 --> 02:32:13,950
And the people,
the guy that got his balls ripped off,

3661
02:32:13,970 --> 02:32:16,410
his face ripped off and the chimps 
towards feed off.

3662
02:32:16,411 --> 02:32:17,244
You remember that guy?
That guy had a pet chimp and that chimp 

3663
02:32:20,551 --> 02:32:21,384
got too old and when they get old 
they're incredibly strong and super 

3664
02:32:24,361 --> 02:32:25,194
aggressive and that they don't 
understand the consequences of biting 

3665
02:32:27,271 --> 02:32:28,104
someone's finger off.
They just decide I'm going to bite your 

3666
02:32:29,880 --> 02:32:30,840
finger off,
whatever.

3667
02:32:30,960 --> 02:32:34,260
Give me that finger.
And that's what the chimpanzee is mean.

3668
02:32:34,500 --> 02:32:38,070
They're wired to survive in the jungle,
you know,

3669
02:32:38,071 --> 02:32:40,880
it is an insanely harsh environment.
It's a little baby champion.

3670
02:32:40,881 --> 02:32:41,714
You look at that hand,
it's a little baby and they're wired to 

3671
02:32:44,761 --> 02:32:47,370
survive in an incredibly harsh 
environment.

3672
02:32:48,060 --> 02:32:53,060
And that includes like fits violence and
retribution violence.

3673
02:32:53,970 --> 02:32:56,310
They're fucking ruthless man.
You know,

3674
02:32:56,311 --> 02:32:57,144
they,
they gang up on other chimps and they 

3675
02:32:58,321 --> 02:32:59,154
plot out war,
like they go after tribes of other 

3676
02:33:02,161 --> 02:33:06,690
chimps and kill them and target them and
they somehow or another figure out a way

3677
02:33:06,691 --> 02:33:09,360
to communicate how to ambush other 
chimps.

3678
02:33:09,660 --> 02:33:11,180
There's a lot of video on it too.
It's,

3679
02:33:11,210 --> 02:33:13,200
it's fucking ruthless,
man.

3680
02:33:13,590 --> 02:33:15,570
It's really hard shit to watch.

3681
02:33:16,130 --> 02:33:16,963
I,
uh,

3682
02:33:17,810 --> 02:33:20,870
I made a gorilla laugh one time.
I was at the,

3683
02:33:21,430 --> 02:33:23,210
I think it's called monkey kingdom in 
Miami.

3684
02:33:23,750 --> 02:33:25,160
And they have this depressed gorilla 
because,

3685
02:33:25,161 --> 02:33:26,240
uh,
this,

3686
02:33:26,570 --> 02:33:27,403
uh,
this circus had them before and they 

3687
02:33:30,201 --> 02:33:32,390
took out his canines.
Oh Jesus.

3688
02:33:32,400 --> 02:33:34,220
Because they wanted to,
they wanted to use him.

3689
02:33:34,490 --> 02:33:35,510
So they removed this.
Yeah.

3690
02:33:35,511 --> 02:33:36,470
They didn't want anything.
People.

3691
02:33:36,530 --> 02:33:38,450
Yeah.
So they took the canines,

3692
02:33:38,451 --> 02:33:42,940
but apparently canines in the gorilla 
kingdom are a sign of a.

3693
02:33:42,950 --> 02:33:46,010
that's how you can become a.
like if you don't have canines,

3694
02:33:46,011 --> 02:33:47,870
then you were just shunned.
You'll never get a partner.

3695
02:33:48,490 --> 02:33:51,320
And so they could never get this one 
gorilla partner.

3696
02:33:51,380 --> 02:33:53,720
I forgot to you.
Google dental implants.

3697
02:33:54,130 --> 02:33:54,963
Uh,
I don't know.

3698
02:33:55,310 --> 02:33:56,940
They can do that.
The hockey players handle.

3699
02:33:57,070 --> 02:33:59,490
No know.
No they didn't.

3700
02:33:59,640 --> 02:34:02,790
It doesn't seem like they could do that.
Get him some nice videos.

3701
02:34:03,000 --> 02:34:03,833
Let's give them a fucking operation.
Human teeth and throw a little gas bomb 

3702
02:34:07,110 --> 02:34:09,620
in his cage.
He doesn't know what the fuck's going on

3703
02:34:10,060 --> 02:34:11,420
them up.
So they're like A.

3704
02:34:11,421 --> 02:34:12,350
Yeah.
Was with the dogs.

3705
02:34:12,380 --> 02:34:14,750
He's really depressed.
And uh,

3706
02:34:15,200 --> 02:34:18,100
I think it's called monkey kingdom is.
What is the name of the place in Miami?

3707
02:34:18,490 --> 02:34:19,420
They go,
he's really depressed.

3708
02:34:19,421 --> 02:34:20,254
He's just a depressed a gorilla.
I Bet I can make them laugh and they're 

3709
02:34:23,771 --> 02:34:24,604
like,
you definitely aren't going to make a 

3710
02:34:25,091 --> 02:34:27,670
primate laugh.
And I swear to you,

3711
02:34:27,671 --> 02:34:28,504
I swear,
and this did not get included on my 

3712
02:34:29,471 --> 02:34:31,000
show.
I swear to God.

3713
02:34:31,300 --> 02:34:33,040
I started doing an impression of a 
gorilla.

3714
02:34:33,220 --> 02:34:37,810
I just started going and then slamming 
my chest and then I went number one like

3715
02:34:37,811 --> 02:34:39,160
this,
and he went,

3716
02:34:39,170 --> 02:34:41,440
Huh,
shut up.

3717
02:34:41,530 --> 02:34:43,360
I literally lost my mind.
I was like,

3718
02:34:43,560 --> 02:34:44,171
I just.
And they're like,

3719
02:34:44,171 --> 02:34:45,280
I can't believe you made them laugh.

3720
02:34:45,460 --> 02:34:47,850
And I was like that.
And then travel channels I go to.

3721
02:34:47,851 --> 02:34:49,480
Let's see why that's pertinent to the 
show.

3722
02:34:49,630 --> 02:34:50,463
I was like,
I just made a fucking like real 

3723
02:34:53,470 --> 02:34:54,700
depressed one.
Yeah.

3724
02:34:54,800 --> 02:34:55,633
How,
what?

3725
02:34:56,360 --> 02:34:57,600
Oh,
oh,

3726
02:34:57,760 --> 02:34:59,080
how frustrating was at.
Oh,

3727
02:34:59,081 --> 02:35:00,680
you have no fucking idea.
Oh,

3728
02:35:00,790 --> 02:35:01,870
I had a show.
I have a,

3729
02:35:02,080 --> 02:35:05,910
I have a clip.
This is the frustrating part is I,

3730
02:35:06,000 --> 02:35:06,833
I,
we did the last season of birth to 

3731
02:35:07,701 --> 02:35:10,360
conquer and I did the whole thing.
I,

3732
02:35:10,660 --> 02:35:11,493
everything that we shot,
it was my thumbprint because we were in 

3733
02:35:13,481 --> 02:35:16,660
between presidents and it was,
it was.

3734
02:35:16,661 --> 02:35:19,390
I'm very proud of that product and we 
showed it to them and they're like,

3735
02:35:19,391 --> 02:35:21,400
it's not all brand.
And so they buried it,

3736
02:35:21,880 --> 02:35:24,100
but in the process,
I mean it's a,

3737
02:35:24,101 --> 02:35:26,470
it was too blue.
It was too rough.

3738
02:35:26,471 --> 02:35:28,810
It wasn't about like,
there was no intro reads,

3739
02:35:28,811 --> 02:35:31,900
I wouldn't do like,
my name's Bert Kreischer and I'm outside

3740
02:35:31,901 --> 02:35:32,734
Cedar Point,
the home of thrill rides in the middle 

3741
02:35:35,711 --> 02:35:36,880
of Ohio,
like whatever it is.

3742
02:35:36,880 --> 02:35:39,140
Did you do instead?
I would be like A.

3743
02:35:40,090 --> 02:35:44,770
I would say stuff like I'm neat.
New Jersey is like a fat ass,

3744
02:35:44,830 --> 02:35:46,930
like a,
like not everyone likes it,

3745
02:35:46,931 --> 02:35:48,190
but if you're into it,
you get it.

3746
02:35:48,220 --> 02:35:49,053
Does that make sense?
And they were really fun reads and it 

3747
02:35:51,760 --> 02:35:54,190
was so irreverent that if you saw them,
there's no,

3748
02:35:54,191 --> 02:35:55,810
you're not turning off the show.
You're like,

3749
02:35:55,960 --> 02:35:57,440
what the fuck?
Like I registered it.

3750
02:35:57,610 --> 02:35:59,380
Yeah.
So uh,

3751
02:35:59,670 --> 02:36:01,180
one of the,
I said to them at the very beginning,

3752
02:36:01,181 --> 02:36:02,014
I said,
hey listen,

3753
02:36:02,200 --> 02:36:04,300
can you just,
there's some clips we have in there.

3754
02:36:04,380 --> 02:36:05,213
It'll definitely go viral.
Can you just air them to promote the 

3755
02:36:06,911 --> 02:36:07,541
series?
And they're like,

3756
02:36:07,541 --> 02:36:08,980
no,
we've got this,

3757
02:36:09,220 --> 02:36:11,140
we know what we're doing.
And so they didn't do it.

3758
02:36:11,560 --> 02:36:14,260
So one of the most,
one of them was this thing,

3759
02:36:14,261 --> 02:36:16,330
Tara dactyl.
It was a ride in Colorado.

3760
02:36:16,330 --> 02:36:18,520
That's fucking amazing.
If you go to their web,

3761
02:36:18,580 --> 02:36:19,413
if you go to travel channels,
facebook page and see how many views 

3762
02:36:21,671 --> 02:36:23,200
it's got,
I think it'll blow you away.

3763
02:36:23,560 --> 02:36:24,393
By the way,
they never heard it when the show about 

3764
02:36:25,871 --> 02:36:28,360
to air.
They aired it later on accident and it's

3765
02:36:28,361 --> 02:36:29,194
the most viewed thing networks ever had 
ever in its history of being alive when 

3766
02:36:32,141 --> 02:36:32,974
the editor by accident,
by when they one girl edited by 

3767
02:36:34,571 --> 02:36:35,760
accident,
didn't know a.

3768
02:36:35,770 --> 02:36:39,400
we're trying to part ways with burt put 
it up and it's got swing.

3769
02:36:39,550 --> 02:36:40,383
Yeah.
How many?

3770
02:36:40,780 --> 02:36:42,010
Two hundred and 40.
2 million?

3771
02:36:42,200 --> 02:36:43,680
Yeah.
Two hundred $42.

3772
02:36:43,681 --> 02:36:46,120
Million views.
Got One point 3 million shares.

3773
02:36:46,580 --> 02:36:50,060
Two hundred and 42 million views.

3774
02:36:50,330 --> 02:36:52,190
Yeah.
Well let me see that.

3775
02:36:52,390 --> 02:36:54,850
Oh my God.
I told them,

3776
02:36:54,851 --> 02:36:55,684
I said is insane.
I've never been seen something with 

3777
02:36:58,631 --> 02:37:00,190
$242,
million views.

3778
02:37:00,220 --> 02:37:01,053
I said,
hey,

3779
02:37:01,130 --> 02:37:03,590
got some viral videos.
And they were like,

3780
02:37:03,591 --> 02:37:04,850
no,
we know better than you,

3781
02:37:04,870 --> 02:37:05,210
dude.

3782
02:37:05,210 --> 02:37:08,930
Eight hundred and 34,000
likes.

3783
02:37:10,970 --> 02:37:13,490
They know better than you fucking idiot.
Look at,

3784
02:37:13,670 --> 02:37:16,430
look at the fucking screen.
Picture me falling

3785
02:37:16,430 --> 02:37:18,740
off a cliff on a chair.
Let me see this.

3786
02:37:18,770 --> 02:37:21,230
Play it out a little bit

3787
02:37:21,270 --> 02:37:26,270
thing to your thing.
So this is all the free for 100 miles an

3788
02:37:28,051 --> 02:37:32,200
hour into the canyon on the terror door.
How do you free fall?

3789
02:37:32,201 --> 02:37:33,034
How's it work?
What do I hold onto when you're in this 

3790
02:37:35,461 --> 02:37:40,461
chair?
It's strung out to a full pro tips.

3791
02:37:42,750 --> 02:37:47,750
Advice.
Let's print out what is.

3792
02:37:49,010 --> 02:37:51,060
I don't understand what's keeping you 
alive.

3793
02:37:51,150 --> 02:37:52,920
It's a string.
A cable

3794
02:37:53,540 --> 02:37:55,400
struggle across the canyon.
Oh my God.

3795
02:37:55,460 --> 02:37:59,990
That is tied to a string in the middle.
You See Colorado?

3796
02:37:59,991 --> 02:38:01,460
Fuck Dude.
By the way,

3797
02:38:01,461 --> 02:38:04,520
there is one that is 10 times funnier 
than this.

3798
02:38:04,700 --> 02:38:07,970
They took me into a spook house and it 
is the spook house.

3799
02:38:08,000 --> 02:38:09,500
Please don't say it involves black 
people.

3800
02:38:11,030 --> 02:38:13,180
No,
it did not blame people.

3801
02:38:14,140 --> 02:38:15,600
It's in.
It's in.

3802
02:38:16,610 --> 02:38:17,443
It's in A.
I wonder if I W I tried to post it 

3803
02:38:19,701 --> 02:38:24,530
online because he used to let me post 
all the content and then once we parted,

3804
02:38:24,770 --> 02:38:26,900
once they realized they were ready to 
part ways with me.

3805
02:38:27,360 --> 02:38:29,980
So it was their idea or your idea.
They asked me what I wanted to do,

3806
02:38:30,020 --> 02:38:32,090
the president at the time,
it took me out to lunch,

3807
02:38:32,091 --> 02:38:33,050
said,
so what do you want to do?

3808
02:38:33,051 --> 02:38:34,620
And I'd said to my therapist,
I was like,

3809
02:38:34,621 --> 02:38:37,040
I think I don't want to ride roller 
coasters.

3810
02:38:37,040 --> 02:38:40,760
I'm done riding roller coasters.
I'll do something that is my idea,

3811
02:38:40,940 --> 02:38:42,680
like I'll do something if you want to do
something,

3812
02:38:42,681 --> 02:38:43,514
we could do something,
but I don't want to just be a host for 

3813
02:38:45,321 --> 02:38:47,470
hire.
I want to have a focusing on standup,

3814
02:38:47,510 --> 02:38:48,343
a focus on my podcast.
I want to do stuff that means something 

3815
02:38:49,971 --> 02:38:51,090
to me.
Like last year,

3816
02:38:51,350 --> 02:38:56,350
this is a last step for a full year ago,
a year ago on roughly probably today.

3817
02:38:57,980 --> 02:38:59,300
I'm like,
yeah,

3818
02:38:59,301 --> 02:39:00,134
like it was October.
It was before we had done the weight 

3819
02:39:01,581 --> 02:39:03,620
loss challenge.
I was the fattest I'd ever been.

3820
02:39:04,010 --> 02:39:06,110
I'd wrapper to conquer.
It was about to start airing.

3821
02:39:06,111 --> 02:39:07,340
So yeah,
I think it was October.

3822
02:39:07,820 --> 02:39:12,050
My special hadn't narrowed my specials 
there in November and she said,

3823
02:39:12,051 --> 02:39:12,771
what are you want to do?
And I said,

3824
02:39:12,771 --> 02:39:14,000
I don't want to ride roller coasters 
anymore.

3825
02:39:14,001 --> 02:39:14,870
And she's like,
okay.

3826
02:39:15,500 --> 02:39:17,800
And so then the fired Bert?

3827
02:39:17,930 --> 02:39:18,740
Yeah,
pretty much.

3828
02:39:18,740 --> 02:39:20,420
Wow.
But my therapist is like,

3829
02:39:20,421 --> 02:39:23,750
don't go in and just ask for a job.
Say what you want and don't,

3830
02:39:23,930 --> 02:39:26,270
don't do anything other than that.
What did you say you wanted to do?

3831
02:39:26,271 --> 02:39:30,140
Like what was the idea that you wanted 
to do a show that I'm,

3832
02:39:30,260 --> 02:39:32,180
I think I'm doing,
I'm going to be doing.

3833
02:39:33,230 --> 02:39:34,063
You got to do another show I'm doing,
I'm going to do a show with my buddy 

3834
02:39:36,620 --> 02:39:37,453
tony.
The guy was telling you about this 

3835
02:39:37,881 --> 02:39:39,230
running Roseanne.
Uh,

3836
02:39:39,231 --> 02:39:40,064
but it's,
I can't tell it because it's a premise 

3837
02:39:40,581 --> 02:39:41,414
is pretty high concept.
We'll talk afterwards but we're doing 

3838
02:39:43,401 --> 02:39:46,310
that and then I'm doing scripted,
which is what I wanted to do.

3839
02:39:46,420 --> 02:39:47,320
Right.
But in.

3840
02:39:47,380 --> 02:39:48,213
But I had already shot this product and 
there was this one thing at a spook 

3841
02:39:50,181 --> 02:39:53,390
house where it's like spooky house.
It's a haunted house.

3842
02:39:53,390 --> 02:39:54,860
It's in Colorado.
What?

3843
02:39:54,880 --> 02:39:55,713
You know,
the place I'm talking about one pulled 

3844
02:39:57,121 --> 02:39:59,480
up here in Ohio,
but that's not from opera to conquer.

3845
02:39:59,540 --> 02:40:01,490
That's from birth to conquer.
How old do I look at it?

3846
02:40:01,730 --> 02:40:06,730
It's got to Joe Rogan shirt on if you,
I swear to God,

3847
02:40:07,731 --> 02:40:08,564
if you watch the full video of this,
it is the funniest thing you've ever 

3848
02:40:10,371 --> 02:40:11,204
seen.
I gave it to them and they just clipped 

3849
02:40:12,291 --> 02:40:13,620
it up and tried to make a.
and I was like,

3850
02:40:13,621 --> 02:40:14,454
don't air the fucking whole video 
because it's me going 25 but not the 

3851
02:40:18,271 --> 02:40:19,950
whole video is about 25 minutes or eight
minutes,

3852
02:40:20,190 --> 02:40:21,023
but it's me doing like an hour tour to 
this spook house and I am losing my 

3853
02:40:24,661 --> 02:40:26,290
shit.
Why wouldn't there?

3854
02:40:26,610 --> 02:40:27,443
Uh,
because what they bombed out at you at 

3855
02:40:28,801 --> 02:40:30,400
this point?
Yeah.

3856
02:40:30,580 --> 02:40:32,570
You were leaving.
I think they just don't.

3857
02:40:32,571 --> 02:40:34,050
They don't like them wearing a 
different.

3858
02:40:34,051 --> 02:40:35,490
You look,
they don't like to wear my shirt.

3859
02:40:35,760 --> 02:40:36,593
They're like,
what?

3860
02:40:36,840 --> 02:40:39,150
Why can't you just wear a black shirt?
Fuck off.

3861
02:40:39,750 --> 02:40:40,900
Fuck off travel.
Ciao.

3862
02:40:41,370 --> 02:40:42,630
Thank you for wearing that though.
That's awesome.

3863
02:40:42,660 --> 02:40:45,810
It's just me getting scared for you are 
so much bigger.

3864
02:40:45,870 --> 02:40:47,280
I know.
Different human.

3865
02:40:47,430 --> 02:40:49,260
I know.
That's so crazy.

3866
02:40:49,280 --> 02:40:51,120
Like do you see yourself there and go,
oh my God,

3867
02:40:51,121 --> 02:40:52,890
I'm unhealthy.
It makes me uncomfortable.

3868
02:40:52,891 --> 02:40:55,140
If you go to the very end,
I'm sweating profusely,

3869
02:40:55,860 --> 02:40:58,920
but like this is,
I get scared and I just pushed my system

3870
02:40:58,921 --> 02:40:59,754
on the.

3871
02:41:04,800 --> 02:41:07,240
Oh well I don't even look like myself.
Yeah.

3872
02:41:07,250 --> 02:41:09,780
You are.
How many more pounds are you there to?

3873
02:41:09,840 --> 02:41:13,020
Sixty to 60 2:50.
So you're 40 plus pounds have.

3874
02:41:13,021 --> 02:41:14,550
Yeah.
Wow.

3875
02:41:15,160 --> 02:41:18,130
Just drinking like crazy.
It is amazing how you've done this,

3876
02:41:18,250 --> 02:41:21,070
you know,
from January to today you've essentially

3877
02:41:21,071 --> 02:41:21,700
changed who you are,

3878
02:41:21,700 --> 02:41:23,560
who are,
you know,

3879
02:41:23,620 --> 02:41:24,310
you have.
I didn't think.

3880
02:41:24,310 --> 02:41:27,210
I think I probably wouldn't have done it
without all of us being a part.

3881
02:41:27,220 --> 02:41:28,690
Like it's been fun.
Yeah.

3882
02:41:28,720 --> 02:41:29,680
You know?
Yeah.

3883
02:41:29,890 --> 02:41:30,320
I felt it

3884
02:41:30,320 --> 02:41:32,630
guilty that you guys went through all 
that shit and I didn't do anything.

3885
02:41:32,990 --> 02:41:33,823
That's one of the reasons why I was 
willing to pay for like that's where 

3886
02:41:36,411 --> 02:41:37,244
things get fucked up.
Like my intention to pay for your trip 

3887
02:41:39,831 --> 02:41:42,560
to the basketball game was a good 
intention,

3888
02:41:42,980 --> 02:41:43,813
but it,
it put our in a weird place because I 

3889
02:41:45,951 --> 02:41:47,570
kind of stepped in for him.
Then when,

3890
02:41:47,580 --> 02:41:50,140
oh Joe,
for our or as a wheelchair.

3891
02:41:50,480 --> 02:41:51,313
Maybe if I didn't do that,
you guys would have sorted it out 

3892
02:41:53,001 --> 02:41:54,530
quicker.
Didn't,

3893
02:41:54,590 --> 02:41:55,670
didn't mean to do that.

3894
02:41:55,710 --> 02:41:57,690
You know when you said that,
you're like,

3895
02:41:57,720 --> 02:41:58,750
no,
don't worry our.

3896
02:41:58,751 --> 02:41:59,740
He's done it.
He's,

3897
02:41:59,820 --> 02:42:01,860
we've been friends a long time.
I got this.

3898
02:42:01,861 --> 02:42:03,690
I had it on my pocket.
So when you said it,

3899
02:42:03,930 --> 02:42:06,270
it was very like you didn't sound like 
you were.

3900
02:42:06,990 --> 02:42:08,790
I didn't feel like you're throwing you 
under the bus at all.

3901
02:42:08,791 --> 02:42:10,800
I didn't feel like it,
but I think he felt like a little bit.

3902
02:42:10,980 --> 02:42:11,813
But I also think there's blood in the 
water and when there's blood in the 

3903
02:42:13,681 --> 02:42:14,514
water,
those fucking online paranas they just 

3904
02:42:15,751 --> 02:42:16,380
find a week.

3905
02:42:16,380 --> 02:42:18,770
Yes.
Spot.

3906
02:42:19,900 --> 02:42:22,070
And if you show that weakness.
Oh,

3907
02:42:22,720 --> 02:42:23,553
milk for a cat.
That's why you were telling them about 

3908
02:42:24,891 --> 02:42:26,120
the comments.
Don't,

3909
02:42:26,180 --> 02:42:28,820
don't fucking respond to those comments.
You know,

3910
02:42:29,030 --> 02:42:30,290
don't,
don't do that.

3911
02:42:30,320 --> 02:42:33,170
He did.
He look love him to death,

3912
02:42:33,230 --> 02:42:35,060
but he posted something Shitty,
really shitty.

3913
02:42:35,061 --> 02:42:38,120
One time he knows it and anyone that 
knows it knows it and if they don't know

3914
02:42:38,121 --> 02:42:38,990
it,
they'll never know it.

3915
02:42:38,991 --> 02:42:42,290
I don't give a fuck,
but I watched the comments roll in after

3916
02:42:42,291 --> 02:42:43,124
that and he didn't realize what he had 
posted and I washed it and it was 

3917
02:42:45,891 --> 02:42:48,510
realized he didn't realize it's a long 
story and I'm going to get into,

3918
02:42:48,530 --> 02:42:49,363
okay,
so I love already and I don't want to 

3919
02:42:49,951 --> 02:42:50,784
end up to deal with it.
But like he didn't realize what he had 

3920
02:42:52,581 --> 02:42:53,414
posted.
He thought he was posting something fun 

3921
02:42:55,400 --> 02:42:57,440
and he.
It was super serious.

3922
02:42:57,440 --> 02:42:58,273
And then dude,
I watched these people rolling with 

3923
02:42:59,691 --> 02:43:00,560
comments,
man,

3924
02:43:00,770 --> 02:43:02,990
Tom and I've said a number of times did 
write down names.

3925
02:43:02,991 --> 02:43:06,320
Don't ever forget the guys that are 
really horrible human beings on here,

3926
02:43:06,650 --> 02:43:07,483
like don't ever forget there are some 
fucking lunatics online like legit 

3927
02:43:11,620 --> 02:43:13,300
fucking lunatics.
Oh,

3928
02:43:13,301 --> 02:43:14,530
of course.
Like when,

3929
02:43:14,590 --> 02:43:16,690
when,
when you said you weren't going to smoke

3930
02:43:16,691 --> 02:43:20,020
weed and we put the prey for Joe thing 
to this guy wrote to me,

3931
02:43:20,021 --> 02:43:20,854
he goes,
don't ever forget you are nothing 

3932
02:43:22,691 --> 02:43:24,790
without Joe Rogan.
That is our medicine.

3933
02:43:24,970 --> 02:43:27,910
We need this medicine and if you're 
going to deprive us of our medicine.

3934
02:43:27,920 --> 02:43:32,230
I was like,
who the fuck do you think you're like,

3935
02:43:33,160 --> 02:43:33,993
I was rob us of our medicine people just
because a lot of broken people out 

3936
02:43:38,241 --> 02:43:38,870
there,
man,

3937
02:43:38,870 --> 02:43:40,880
and whoever you are,
if you're.

3938
02:43:40,881 --> 02:43:43,280
That guy looked mad.
I didn't take my medicine for 12 days.

3939
02:43:43,281 --> 02:43:44,900
I'm good.
Just relax.

3940
02:43:45,760 --> 02:43:46,760
I mean,
but some people.

3941
02:43:46,850 --> 02:43:48,270
Here's the thing,
right?

3942
02:43:48,470 --> 02:43:53,120
I used to do a joke about this,
that I did have a medical marijuana card

3943
02:43:53,121 --> 02:43:56,480
before it was illegal.
It was illegal only medically,

3944
02:43:56,810 --> 02:43:59,430
but if you didn't get a medical 
marijuana card,

3945
02:43:59,440 --> 02:44:01,250
if you went to a doctor and they said,
no,

3946
02:44:01,460 --> 02:44:02,293
you should go to a fucking hospital 
because it's probably something really 

3947
02:44:04,101 --> 02:44:06,470
wrong with you because they were giving 
them away like candy,

3948
02:44:06,471 --> 02:44:08,690
like anybody can get a medical marijuana
card,

3949
02:44:09,050 --> 02:44:09,883
and someone was said to me like,
well you are throwing it in the face of 

3950
02:44:12,291 --> 02:44:16,640
the people that actually need marijuana 
for like glaucoma or ptsd or whatever.

3951
02:44:16,641 --> 02:44:18,710
Like what you're doing is skirting the 
system.

3952
02:44:18,711 --> 02:44:20,150
I might.
Yeah.

3953
02:44:20,920 --> 02:44:21,753
Yeah.

3954
02:44:22,980 --> 02:44:23,740
So what?

3955
02:44:23,740 --> 02:44:24,573
I'm still getting weed legally.
I'm not hurting anybody by getting weed 

3956
02:44:26,681 --> 02:44:27,514
legally stupid.
Just like promoting the fact that weeds 

3957
02:44:29,501 --> 02:44:30,334
awesome,
and then also there's the thing with 

3958
02:44:32,531 --> 02:44:37,531
like it's fun for just calming you down 
and giving you a perspective in life.

3959
02:44:38,170 --> 02:44:39,003
I think weed has made me and I think 
there's probably a lot of other factors 

3960
02:44:41,651 --> 02:44:43,660
as well.
I don't want to say it's all weed.

3961
02:44:44,370 --> 02:44:45,203
The weed is made me a nicer person 
because it's made me more sensitive and 

3962
02:44:47,861 --> 02:44:51,100
I think that if there's one thing that 
we could all use more in this,

3963
02:44:51,101 --> 02:44:51,934
like everybody gets carried away and 
everybody's a work in progress and 

3964
02:44:54,641 --> 02:44:57,190
people all say things that they probably
shouldn't have or just,

3965
02:44:57,520 --> 02:45:01,670
you know,
you're acting impulsively or you know,

3966
02:45:01,780 --> 02:45:02,613
just you'd go with the thought that's in
your head and you say what's on your 

3967
02:45:05,231 --> 02:45:06,700
mind.
It doesn't come out right.

3968
02:45:06,710 --> 02:45:08,050
Yeah.
We've all done that.

3969
02:45:08,080 --> 02:45:08,913
Right?
But marijuana for me highlights all 

3970
02:45:10,991 --> 02:45:11,824
those things and know almost ruthlessly 
introspective way that makes me a nicer 

3971
02:45:15,041 --> 02:45:17,080
person.
It makes me think about things,

3972
02:45:17,081 --> 02:45:18,820
especially when I'm in the tank,
man,

3973
02:45:19,240 --> 02:45:20,860
when I get in the tank,
when I smoke weed,

3974
02:45:20,861 --> 02:45:25,290
I just think about every thing.
It's like a God damn.

3975
02:45:26,120 --> 02:45:27,800
I should do that.
I should do that time.

3976
02:45:27,810 --> 02:45:29,110
New Studio.
I should do that.

3977
02:45:29,111 --> 02:45:33,190
Tank new studio has a tank.
I got to do the tag before I quit before

3978
02:45:33,191 --> 02:45:34,630
October is up.
Okay.

3979
02:45:34,720 --> 02:45:35,553
I want to try it for them.
I want to try it sober and then went in 

3980
02:45:38,680 --> 02:45:39,700
November.
I want to try it.

3981
02:45:39,701 --> 02:45:40,534
Hi.
One time.

3982
02:45:40,550 --> 02:45:41,383
Well,
it'll be installed in the third week of 

3983
02:45:43,011 --> 02:45:44,330
October.
Really?

3984
02:45:44,331 --> 02:45:44,871
Yeah.
Yeah.

3985
02:45:44,871 --> 02:45:47,750
The tanks coming soon.
So as soon as this one from your home.

3986
02:45:47,930 --> 02:45:48,211
No,
no,

3987
02:45:48,211 --> 02:45:48,891
no.
It's a new one.

3988
02:45:48,891 --> 02:45:50,630
They took the one out of my house.
Crashed.

3989
02:45:50,631 --> 02:45:52,550
By the way folks,
if you're in California,

3990
02:45:52,600 --> 02:45:53,433
you the float lab is the greatest float 
place in the world and this guy is like 

3991
02:45:59,090 --> 02:45:59,923
a lot of people credit me for.
I'm making a isolation tanks more 

3992
02:46:04,431 --> 02:46:06,680
popular.
I'm very happy that that's the case,

3993
02:46:06,681 --> 02:46:07,514
but my tank increased dramatically when 
I hooked up with crash because I had a 

3994
02:46:14,061 --> 02:46:17,990
friend who was working on my tank and he
was fixing it and I had an older tank.

3995
02:46:18,260 --> 02:46:19,093
It wasn't the best tank,
but it was good and I had great 

3996
02:46:21,471 --> 02:46:22,304
experiences in it,
but he told me about this guy in Venice 

3997
02:46:26,050 --> 02:46:28,580
that ran this place called the float lab
and I said,

3998
02:46:28,581 --> 02:46:29,330
well,
what's the difference?

3999
02:46:29,330 --> 02:46:32,000
He's like,
his stuff is just like super engineered.

4000
02:46:32,001 --> 02:46:32,834
It's like the best stuff,
like you don't have any of the issues 

4001
02:46:34,881 --> 02:46:39,000
with like the bladders at the bottom 
that hold the hold,

4002
02:46:39,050 --> 02:46:42,950
the water in breaking because he doesn't
use waterbed bladders instead.

4003
02:46:42,951 --> 02:46:45,500
He uses those things to use for ponds 
like Koi ponds,

4004
02:46:45,501 --> 02:46:48,290
like a very thick,
thick plastic.

4005
02:46:48,650 --> 02:46:51,260
Everything.
He has air pumped in it so you get fresh

4006
02:46:51,261 --> 02:46:52,094
oxygen inside the tank.
He just like that he uses to waterbed 

4007
02:46:56,481 --> 02:46:59,000
heaters and they work together 
simultaneously.

4008
02:46:59,240 --> 02:47:00,073
His like,
he has a really excellent digital 

4009
02:47:01,671 --> 02:47:02,504
calibration system for the temperature,
like he takes it to the next level with 

4010
02:47:05,991 --> 02:47:08,540
everything.
He's got an ozone filtration system that

4011
02:47:08,541 --> 02:47:10,580
kills all the bacteria.
It kills everything.

4012
02:47:10,790 --> 02:47:11,623
He uses two gigantic Jacuzzi filters 
that everything gets run through these 

4013
02:47:15,330 --> 02:47:18,500
like tiny micron.
I forget what the number is.

4014
02:47:18,501 --> 02:47:19,334
Filters where like they filter 
everything out of that water and for me 

4015
02:47:22,341 --> 02:47:23,174
it's like it's only me in the water,
but for public one it's critically 

4016
02:47:26,301 --> 02:47:28,490
important that you know,
you know,

4017
02:47:28,491 --> 02:47:29,324
that you're not gonna catch some weird 
skin disease or something when you get 

4018
02:47:30,801 --> 02:47:31,670
inside these tanks.

4019
02:47:32,150 --> 02:47:33,650
So this guy,
um,

4020
02:47:33,651 --> 02:47:35,380
I got in touch with him,
uh,

4021
02:47:35,450 --> 02:47:36,283
got a tank from him.
He installed them in my basement and 

4022
02:47:38,331 --> 02:47:38,891
then,
you know,

4023
02:47:38,891 --> 02:47:39,724
I'm just,
I can't shut the fuck up about things I 

4024
02:47:41,091 --> 02:47:44,780
love and that's part of my problem was 
I'm repetitive as fuck,

4025
02:47:44,840 --> 02:47:49,320
but it's what makes me good at things.
I get obsessive and that mindset,

4026
02:47:49,321 --> 02:47:50,154
I'm just like constantly droning on 
about the same things constantly and 

4027
02:47:52,521 --> 02:47:54,320
sometimes that becomes a problem with 
podcasts,

4028
02:47:54,321 --> 02:47:56,890
but crash that guy,
he's,

4029
02:47:56,920 --> 02:47:59,660
he's the motherfucker behind tanks.
If it wasn't for him,

4030
02:47:59,900 --> 02:48:03,200
the tanks that we have,
even not the non crash tanks,

4031
02:48:03,320 --> 02:48:04,153
non float lab tanks,
all the other tanks in the world they 

4032
02:48:07,101 --> 02:48:08,750
are.
That is the gold standard.

4033
02:48:08,870 --> 02:48:12,650
His tanks are the gold standard in all 
the other tanks since then have.

4034
02:48:13,160 --> 02:48:13,993
They've elevated in quality 
substantially because of his 

4035
02:48:16,641 --> 02:48:19,250
contribution.
When I first started using the tank,

4036
02:48:19,550 --> 02:48:22,100
which was like early two thousands,
like 2000,

4037
02:48:22,130 --> 02:48:27,080
I think I got one in 2003 and I think 
our first time,

4038
02:48:27,110 --> 02:48:27,943
first time I got in one was like 2000 
2001 and I had one in my basement in 

4039
02:48:30,921 --> 02:48:31,754
2003.
From that time the fucking whole 

4040
02:48:33,891 --> 02:48:36,710
business has gone like this.
Now they're everywhere.

4041
02:48:36,711 --> 02:48:37,544
Giant tanks.

4042
02:48:37,710 --> 02:48:38,543
There's one in Omaha.
I was in Omaha and this guy was at my 

4043
02:48:40,721 --> 02:48:41,081
show.
He goes,

4044
02:48:41,081 --> 02:48:41,914
man,
I work at a float lab where I worked at 

4045
02:48:42,961 --> 02:48:44,320
a tank place.
He's like,

4046
02:48:44,440 --> 02:48:45,430
we should go with.
I was like,

4047
02:48:45,431 --> 02:48:46,900
let's go now.
He was like,

4048
02:48:46,901 --> 02:48:49,980
let me call the owner and this is,
I got to say this to this owner and Oma.

4049
02:48:50,590 --> 02:48:51,330
Tony's like,
ah,

4050
02:48:51,330 --> 02:48:53,350
we can't go drunk.
And was like,

4051
02:48:53,351 --> 02:48:53,831
why?
He's like,

4052
02:48:53,831 --> 02:48:55,000
I think he thinks you're going to pee in
it,

4053
02:48:57,800 --> 02:48:59,170
but yeah,
I want to do it.

4054
02:48:59,840 --> 02:49:01,350
Well you will,
you'll do it.

4055
02:49:01,410 --> 02:49:02,220
I'll have you,
uh,

4056
02:49:02,220 --> 02:49:04,170
in like right after it's installed.
But uh,

4057
02:49:04,171 --> 02:49:06,910
so we're getting a new one put in 
because that's the thing about crash.

4058
02:49:06,911 --> 02:49:09,720
He's crazy.
He's constantly like innovating.

4059
02:49:09,780 --> 02:49:12,510
He's like constantly,
like even if it tanks perfect,

4060
02:49:12,511 --> 02:49:12,811
he's like,
no,

4061
02:49:12,811 --> 02:49:12,901
no,
no,

4062
02:49:12,901 --> 02:49:14,340
no.
That's the old one,

4063
02:49:14,430 --> 02:49:16,230
the old version.
We got to get rid of that.

4064
02:49:16,231 --> 02:49:17,850
We got to take it out.
We got an upgrade,

4065
02:49:17,880 --> 02:49:19,150
upgrade everything.
Like he's.

4066
02:49:19,170 --> 02:49:21,540
He's just nuts with that shit.
Wow.

4067
02:49:21,570 --> 02:49:22,920
Yeah.
He's a mastermind.

4068
02:49:22,950 --> 02:49:26,850
He's like a real mad scientist genius 
character when it comes to tanks.

4069
02:49:27,340 --> 02:49:27,791
Oh,
that's.

4070
02:49:27,791 --> 02:49:29,710
I think I,
I could fucking.

4071
02:49:30,960 --> 02:49:32,080
Yeah.
I got to get a tank.

4072
02:49:32,140 --> 02:49:33,810
You love it.
I tried to get into tm.

4073
02:49:34,180 --> 02:49:35,860
TM,
transcendental meditation,

4074
02:49:36,610 --> 02:49:38,860
transcendental meditation.
I missed the fucking class.

4075
02:49:38,940 --> 02:49:39,773
Well,
the thing about tanks is you could do 

4076
02:49:41,401 --> 02:49:44,610
all the meditation and tanks,
but you have way more,

4077
02:49:44,670 --> 02:49:47,250
um,
disconnection from your body.

4078
02:49:47,310 --> 02:49:48,143
And I think that's important.
It disconnects your mind and your 

4079
02:49:51,451 --> 02:49:53,880
thoughts and your ideas from your 
physical frame.

4080
02:49:53,980 --> 02:49:56,070
Like that's what people are trying to do
when they meditate.

4081
02:49:56,071 --> 02:49:59,640
Like you're trying to sit down in a 
comfortable spot and just concentrate on

4082
02:49:59,641 --> 02:50:00,474
your thoughts and you absolutely can 
achieve these amazing states of mind in 

4083
02:50:03,781 --> 02:50:04,614
that way.
But I feel like those states are 

4084
02:50:06,090 --> 02:50:06,923
elevated substantially from the tank and
everyone I know that disagrees is never 

4085
02:50:09,781 --> 02:50:10,614
done.
The tank.

4086
02:50:10,740 --> 02:50:12,450
People that have done the tank.
Oh yeah.

4087
02:50:12,990 --> 02:50:16,170
People that know that meditate and do 
the tank as well go,

4088
02:50:16,171 --> 02:50:17,670
oh my God,
this is a game changer.

4089
02:50:17,671 --> 02:50:18,504
It's,
it's just a completely different 

4090
02:50:19,021 --> 02:50:20,070
environment.
And the people,

4091
02:50:20,071 --> 02:50:20,904
the people that resist that have talked 
to a few people that meditate and 

4092
02:50:22,861 --> 02:50:23,700
they're like,
do you meditate?

4093
02:50:23,700 --> 02:50:24,450
I'm like,
yes,

4094
02:50:24,450 --> 02:50:26,160
I do.
I meditate in my tank.

4095
02:50:26,161 --> 02:50:26,671
And they're like,
wow,

4096
02:50:26,671 --> 02:50:27,620
that's not the same thing.
Like,

4097
02:50:27,680 --> 02:50:28,513
listen,
you fucking hippie know what you're 

4098
02:50:30,301 --> 02:50:32,340
talking about.
I've meditated regular to.

4099
02:50:32,570 --> 02:50:33,990
I just try it.
Have you tried it?

4100
02:50:34,020 --> 02:50:34,530
No,
I have it.

4101
02:50:34,530 --> 02:50:36,330
They shut the fuck up.
Shut the fuck up.

4102
02:50:36,390 --> 02:50:37,223
Because it's a.
it's a complete naturally occurring 

4103
02:50:39,511 --> 02:50:41,820
psychedelic state.
So anybody who's sober,

4104
02:50:41,821 --> 02:50:44,130
anybody doesn't want to fuck with drugs.
I always tell them,

4105
02:50:44,210 --> 02:50:48,660
get in that God damn tank and you'll 
have a drug experience without any drugs

4106
02:50:48,810 --> 02:50:50,570
or you don't have to worry about losing 
your mind.

4107
02:50:50,571 --> 02:50:51,404
You have to worry about addiction.
You have to worry about overdosing or 

4108
02:50:53,221 --> 02:50:55,110
getting something to give you the wrong 
shit.

4109
02:50:55,410 --> 02:50:56,243
You can get in that tank and 
legitimately have a psychedelic 

4110
02:50:58,951 --> 02:50:59,784
experience.

4111
02:51:00,230 --> 02:51:00,741
Uh,
yeah.

4112
02:51:00,741 --> 02:51:02,880
I got to try it.
Do well.

4113
02:51:03,100 --> 02:51:04,580
The big thing,
this is gonna sound.

4114
02:51:04,581 --> 02:51:05,450
Once again,
this is going to sound.

4115
02:51:05,660 --> 02:51:08,330
A lot of my realizations this month are 
going to sound very,

4116
02:51:09,020 --> 02:51:09,853
very childish and pedestrian.
But like one of my really hard things 

4117
02:51:12,471 --> 02:51:15,410
was going to sleep like I didn't.
We call them unassisted,

4118
02:51:15,411 --> 02:51:18,050
sleeps in our house so we can go to 
sleep without drugs or alcohol.

4119
02:51:18,380 --> 02:51:23,380
And I had seven this year total.
I pulled down fucking 13 in a row.

4120
02:51:24,360 --> 02:51:28,100
And so now the idea of sleep doesn't 
panic me the way it used to.

4121
02:51:28,490 --> 02:51:30,170
Like last night I did a podcast,
these,

4122
02:51:30,171 --> 02:51:32,480
uh,
young ladies and then I just,

4123
02:51:33,170 --> 02:51:34,430
I just like,
it was like,

4124
02:51:34,431 --> 02:51:37,640
I'm going to bed now and I got in bed 
and I just closed my eyes.

4125
02:51:38,120 --> 02:51:39,890
That's crazy dude.
You're healthy.

4126
02:51:40,160 --> 02:51:41,120
Like I was like,
I was like,

4127
02:51:41,121 --> 02:51:42,050
I'm going to bed now.

4128
02:51:43,350 --> 02:51:45,800
I'm proud of you.
I really am.

4129
02:51:46,040 --> 02:51:49,100
This is what you've done is considering 
your lifestyle.

4130
02:51:49,101 --> 02:51:51,230
And how long you've been doing it that 
way.

4131
02:51:51,470 --> 02:51:53,240
It's amazing.
And I know that you,

4132
02:51:53,660 --> 02:51:54,493
you rise to the challenge of a 
competition that sort of motivated you 

4133
02:51:57,351 --> 02:51:58,820
to do that.
Not a lot of people would have done it,

4134
02:51:58,821 --> 02:52:00,920
man.
A lot of people would have quit by now.

4135
02:52:00,950 --> 02:52:04,760
A lot of people would have found some 
excuses or figured out some way like,

4136
02:52:04,761 --> 02:52:06,010
ah,
it was my friend's

4137
02:52:06,010 --> 02:52:07,360
birthday.
I had to do a shot with them.

4138
02:52:07,361 --> 02:52:07,840
You know,
like,

4139
02:52:07,840 --> 02:52:11,980
this is all sorts of weird tricks that 
your mind will play on you to get you to

4140
02:52:11,981 --> 02:52:13,160
quit,
you know,

4141
02:52:13,450 --> 02:52:13,940
in,
in,

4142
02:52:13,940 --> 02:52:15,850
in a bunch of different ways.
But I'm proud of you.

4143
02:52:15,851 --> 02:52:16,684
You've literally changed your health.
You turn your health around in a very 

4144
02:52:19,511 --> 02:52:20,410
short period of time.

4145
02:52:20,670 --> 02:52:21,940
I appreciate it.
Thank you joe.

4146
02:52:22,480 --> 02:52:23,313
I got.
I got a lot of those people because a 

4147
02:52:23,891 --> 02:52:25,450
lot of people were doing it with us.
Yeah,

4148
02:52:25,451 --> 02:52:27,310
no,
we'll noonan is quit smoking,

4149
02:52:27,520 --> 02:52:29,260
which is a big fucking deal.
Hard one.

4150
02:52:29,261 --> 02:52:31,000
Apparently really big.
He quit smoking,

4151
02:52:31,510 --> 02:52:34,390
but it's fun to hear the guys who do did
fall off.

4152
02:52:34,620 --> 02:52:35,453
God,
I was with the until football on 

4153
02:52:37,051 --> 02:52:38,310
Saturday.
I'm sorry brother.

4154
02:52:39,030 --> 02:52:39,811
And you're like,
you're like,

4155
02:52:39,811 --> 02:52:40,411
yeah,
I know.

4156
02:52:40,411 --> 02:52:42,870
I know the feeling.
I know what it is too,

4157
02:52:43,080 --> 02:52:45,300
but you just have to make a rule,
you know,

4158
02:52:45,301 --> 02:52:46,330
and just try again.
You know,

4159
02:52:46,350 --> 02:52:48,540
it doesn't have to be sober October.
You can do it in November,

4160
02:52:49,000 --> 02:52:53,710
but there's a beautiful thing in having 
like a set schedule tomorrow begin.

4161
02:52:53,711 --> 02:52:55,290
So bratty.
I have to do it.

4162
02:52:55,291 --> 02:52:58,110
I'm going to do it for 30 days and if 
you can do it,

4163
02:52:59,070 --> 02:53:04,070
the people prayed for me and now I'm off
of marijuana going right back though.

4164
02:53:04,950 --> 02:53:05,580
Can't wait.

4165
02:53:05,580 --> 02:53:06,413
I kind of wish.
I think all of us kind of wish we were 

4166
02:53:07,921 --> 02:53:09,510
all together for that first night.

4167
02:53:09,840 --> 02:53:12,420
I know I'm kind of bummed out that you 
guys are going to be New Orleans,

4168
02:53:12,990 --> 02:53:13,830
but we'll,
we'll,

4169
02:53:13,890 --> 02:53:17,960
we'll come back for another podcast,
will get Super Jew to get on a plane and

4170
02:53:17,970 --> 02:53:18,803
come over here and we'll have some fun 
together and by then he'll have already 

4171
02:53:21,481 --> 02:53:23,580
started smoking pot again,
so we'll probably be more happy,

4172
02:53:23,590 --> 02:53:25,170
Ari.
Oh yeah.

4173
02:53:25,420 --> 02:53:27,300
We'll be at the new studio too,
but yeah,

4174
02:53:27,301 --> 02:53:28,170
we'll do that.
Well,

4175
02:53:28,171 --> 02:53:30,750
all three of us get together and have.
We should do.

4176
02:53:30,840 --> 02:53:33,810
I don't know if he's willing to do yoga 
after this challenge.

4177
02:53:33,811 --> 02:53:36,990
I think this challenge,
but for um,

4178
02:53:37,490 --> 02:53:38,940
you know,
do you think you will.

4179
02:53:39,470 --> 02:53:43,970
I love that he calls it a chore to set 
my alarm because I had a george today.

4180
02:53:44,220 --> 02:53:46,680
Did you listen to his podcast when he's 
talking about it?

4181
02:53:46,681 --> 02:53:50,610
I did.
I'm a goddamn professional comedian.

4182
02:53:50,790 --> 02:53:53,910
I'm a Jewish entertainer in New York 
City.

4183
02:53:55,080 --> 02:54:00,080
He liked to drink and do drugs because 
this mock anger is so awesome.

4184
02:54:00,430 --> 02:54:03,350
If I was howling laughing,
driving the girl's house,

4185
02:54:03,370 --> 02:54:04,203
I got there.
I go,

4186
02:54:04,350 --> 02:54:06,150
have you been living in North podcast?
He's like,

4187
02:54:06,410 --> 02:54:08,370
we don't realize the latest one was 35 
minutes ago.

4188
02:54:08,390 --> 02:54:11,580
It's 35 minutes of gold for me.
You know,

4189
02:54:11,640 --> 02:54:13,620
sort of everyone's list.
You should listen.

4190
02:54:13,621 --> 02:54:15,930
I think it's meant for us.
Well,

4191
02:54:15,931 --> 02:54:18,660
I'm glad he decided to go with it.
It's awesome stuff.

4192
02:54:18,780 --> 02:54:21,040
He was the one that said no weed.
He was the one he,

4193
02:54:21,210 --> 02:54:24,180
he texted me personally.
Goes personally,

4194
02:54:24,190 --> 02:54:25,023
I don't think you have a problem,
I love you and if you're going to do no 

4195
02:54:27,601 --> 02:54:28,434
booze,
I'm going to take away the thing I care 

4196
02:54:29,161 --> 02:54:31,930
about and that's weed and then he and 
then he texted that to me,

4197
02:54:31,931 --> 02:54:35,090
him and Tom,
and then I made that video of me running

4198
02:54:35,100 --> 02:54:38,400
thing and in it and I was like no weed,
and I said to Tom and Tom was like,

4199
02:54:38,401 --> 02:54:40,080
I don't know if joe knows about no weed 
yet.

4200
02:54:40,500 --> 02:54:41,850
And then you were like,
hey guys,

4201
02:54:41,851 --> 02:54:43,740
I'm not doing no weed.
And then always like,

4202
02:54:43,741 --> 02:54:45,270
oh,
I bullied him into a corner and see if I

4203
02:54:45,271 --> 02:54:46,104
can get them to do it.

4204
02:54:46,840 --> 02:54:48,990
That's hilarious.
It wasn't affecting me at all.

4205
02:54:48,991 --> 02:54:50,460
The bullying.
I thought it was hilarious.

4206
02:54:50,461 --> 02:54:52,980
I thought it was too,
but I was willing to do it because I was

4207
02:54:52,981 --> 02:54:53,814
like,
all right,

4208
02:54:53,850 --> 02:54:55,230
well two things.
I thought one,

4209
02:54:55,740 --> 02:54:56,573
the optics,
it doesn't look good if I'm telling you 

4210
02:54:58,111 --> 02:55:00,780
guys to quit the booze and then when it 
comes to the weed,

4211
02:55:00,781 --> 02:55:01,300
I'm like,
no,

4212
02:55:01,300 --> 02:55:02,790
no,
that wasn't a part of the deal,

4213
02:55:02,940 --> 02:55:04,010
but I'm like,
I want people to

4214
02:55:04,010 --> 02:55:07,880
know that it's not hard to quit weed.
It's really easy and yeah,

4215
02:55:07,881 --> 02:55:12,260
I know I'm only quoting it for a month,
but I'm telling you it's fucking easy.

4216
02:55:12,261 --> 02:55:15,050
Like it has literally changed nothing 
about my life.

4217
02:55:15,170 --> 02:55:18,050
Like I've,
I can do all the same things.

4218
02:55:18,320 --> 02:55:22,220
I think marijuana,
like anything can be abused,

4219
02:55:22,221 --> 02:55:23,054
but I also think it's a valuable tool 
and I think as long as you use it as a 

4220
02:55:26,421 --> 02:55:29,240
tool and I think one of the things about
this experience,

4221
02:55:29,250 --> 02:55:32,600
I think I'm going to use it more 
judiciously.

4222
02:55:32,870 --> 02:55:34,250
I'm going to,
uh,

4223
02:55:34,251 --> 02:55:36,680
I'm gonna use it less.
I think

4224
02:55:37,440 --> 02:55:39,330
I'm going to be that way with alcohol.
I want to enjoy it.

4225
02:55:39,420 --> 02:55:40,253
I want to,
I want it to be part of the party as 

4226
02:55:42,631 --> 02:55:46,090
opposed to it'd be the thing.
Yeah.

4227
02:55:46,140 --> 02:55:48,450
Like I wanted to like accept like,
like a,

4228
02:55:48,680 --> 02:55:53,100
like a very accurate statement is going 
out to the patio and the store.

4229
02:55:53,430 --> 02:55:57,300
Sometimes you do see something that I 
was just part of my night was like,

4230
02:55:57,301 --> 02:56:00,210
do my set,
go to the patio and the store as opposed

4231
02:56:00,211 --> 02:56:01,044
to like Burger.
I always think Berger uses booze 

4232
02:56:02,101 --> 02:56:02,934
properly.
He's like a get done a set and he's 

4233
02:56:04,651 --> 02:56:05,790
like,
you want to go have a whiskey?

4234
02:56:06,040 --> 02:56:06,873
You go back to that backbone,
you have a whiskey with them and you're 

4235
02:56:08,341 --> 02:56:11,310
talking about something for 30 minutes.
Not overkill.

4236
02:56:11,670 --> 02:56:12,490
It's like,
all right,

4237
02:56:12,490 --> 02:56:13,920
I just made the drive home.
Interesting.

4238
02:56:13,921 --> 02:56:14,754
I'm going,
yeah.

4239
02:56:14,800 --> 02:56:16,200
He's a disciplined guy.

4240
02:56:16,350 --> 02:56:17,760
You know,
he's a,

4241
02:56:17,790 --> 02:56:20,550
he's an interesting guy in that regard.
He works really hard.

4242
02:56:20,551 --> 02:56:21,384
He's very disciplined,
but he's also very smart and 

4243
02:56:22,651 --> 02:56:24,700
understanding the trappings,
you know,

4244
02:56:24,720 --> 02:56:26,640
where things can go wrong.
You know,

4245
02:56:27,300 --> 02:56:30,300
he's a wise man is.
There's a lot of them out there,

4246
02:56:30,301 --> 02:56:30,871
man.
You know,

4247
02:56:30,871 --> 02:56:33,690
you just got to find him and cultivated 
and we're very lucky.

4248
02:56:33,750 --> 02:56:36,060
Very fucking lucky.
I will say,

4249
02:56:36,330 --> 02:56:37,163
me personally,
I'm very lucky to have the group of 

4250
02:56:38,521 --> 02:56:40,650
friends I have because I go,
I look back,

4251
02:56:40,800 --> 02:56:43,860
I remember you telling me a long time 
ago over a shot of whiskey.

4252
02:56:44,100 --> 02:56:44,933
You don't have to have a shitty friends.
A lot of people like you just just let 

4253
02:56:48,091 --> 02:56:48,924
them be your friend,
but you had a few people in your life 

4254
02:56:50,311 --> 02:56:54,130
that were monsters.
I was not good at figuring that.

4255
02:56:54,131 --> 02:56:56,320
I remember you were like here a really 
good that we at the ice house,

4256
02:56:56,340 --> 02:56:58,710
you were really good guy and everyone's 
trying to be your friend.

4257
02:56:58,711 --> 02:57:01,200
Just let it happen.
So protected.

4258
02:57:01,230 --> 02:57:03,660
Well you had that one monster in your 
life and you know,

4259
02:57:03,661 --> 02:57:05,810
once you got rid of him,
your everything

4260
02:57:06,090 --> 02:57:08,110
kind of went smoother and you also 
realize like,

4261
02:57:08,140 --> 02:57:08,973
oh,
like other comedians actually want you 

4262
02:57:10,721 --> 02:57:13,900
to succeed.
They're not trying to hold you down.

4263
02:57:14,020 --> 02:57:14,853
They're not trying to shit on you and 
like literally remove parts of you 

4264
02:57:19,020 --> 02:57:20,620
there.
They want you to be happy.

4265
02:57:20,621 --> 02:57:21,454
They want to enhance the.
And then also you realize that there's 

4266
02:57:24,761 --> 02:57:25,594
beauty in that community of like seeing 
people succeed and being happy for them 

4267
02:57:29,710 --> 02:57:30,543
and they're happy for you and you're 
happy for each other and everybody can 

4268
02:57:32,141 --> 02:57:32,974
get together and laugh.

4269
02:57:33,580 --> 02:57:35,650
Yeah.
I mean God has called me the other night

4270
02:57:35,700 --> 02:57:39,420
and the fights on and he goes,
dog fuck spots.

4271
02:57:39,430 --> 02:57:41,380
I was watching a fight.
I want to see mighty mighty mouse.

4272
02:57:41,530 --> 02:57:42,363
I saw that.
The video of you guys all together and 

4273
02:57:43,811 --> 02:57:44,890
Joey high as fuck.
You know,

4274
02:57:44,891 --> 02:57:45,724
you've got to contact how you probably 
broke the rules by hanging out with 

4275
02:57:47,471 --> 02:57:50,140
Joey.
I definitely thought about that.

4276
02:57:50,800 --> 02:57:55,800
He's like to join us at a time.
Have you seen that video of him?

4277
02:57:57,340 --> 02:58:00,040
Joey Diaz,
like talking about like his State of the

4278
02:58:00,041 --> 02:58:02,130
Union address.
His is talking

4279
02:58:02,130 --> 02:58:03,950
about making North Korea glow in the 
dark.

4280
02:58:04,020 --> 02:58:05,430
Find it.
I think it's on.

4281
02:58:06,180 --> 02:58:07,013
It's on fucking Americans.
He's wearing a green shirt and I was 

4282
02:58:10,441 --> 02:58:11,274
crying literally.
Tears are rolling down my face when I 

4283
02:58:13,771 --> 02:58:15,690
was watching.
I think it's on the mat flavors.

4284
02:58:15,691 --> 02:58:19,760
World instagram account.
I know you can find it.

4285
02:58:21,950 --> 02:58:23,330
Show me.
Show me what you got.

4286
02:58:23,400 --> 02:58:24,980
Says October,
let me see what it looks like.

4287
02:58:25,310 --> 02:58:26,143
Uh,

4288
02:58:28,160 --> 02:58:30,620
um,
yeah,

4289
02:58:30,621 --> 02:58:32,300
that's it.
He takes the glasses off.

4290
02:58:32,450 --> 02:58:34,910
See if you just play this will.
We'll go out with this.

4291
02:58:34,911 --> 02:58:36,320
Bear Chrysler.
I'm proud of you man.

4292
02:58:36,380 --> 02:58:37,760
I really am.
We're going to leave.

4293
02:58:37,790 --> 02:58:40,130
We're going to leave you guys with the 
great and powerful Joey Diaz.

4294
02:58:48,250 --> 02:58:52,720
Tough stuff because it's all over.
We had a rough couple of months.

4295
02:58:54,140 --> 02:58:59,020
Katrina's cousin Maria,
the other one for the Rico Houston.

4296
02:58:59,680 --> 02:59:03,760
Fucking slow and listen,
it's been tough up to now.

4297
02:59:03,761 --> 02:59:08,290
The earthquake in Mexico,
you know the White House level?

4298
02:59:08,291 --> 02:59:10,840
The fuck is going on,
but it don't matter.

4299
02:59:11,710 --> 02:59:14,050
They want to shoot.
It's time to fuck this.

4300
02:59:14,051 --> 02:59:14,990
Shoot.
Ducks stuck.

4301
02:59:15,510 --> 02:59:18,970
They want to get down and dirty.
Don't forget who the fuck we are.

4302
02:59:18,971 --> 02:59:22,120
You understand me with the baddest 
motherfuckers out there,

4303
02:59:22,660 --> 02:59:24,830
you send the message to that fucking 
North Korea.

4304
02:59:25,360 --> 02:59:28,490
He's going to be sniffing my deck and 
stuck in my ass.

4305
02:59:28,590 --> 02:59:33,590
Harder focus.
Korean Americans got put the gun control

4306
02:59:42,580 --> 02:59:45,100
that sell them was done for them in the 
last three days.

4307
02:59:45,740 --> 02:59:48,620
Put the fucking whining.
Stop with the.

4308
02:59:50,310 --> 02:59:52,330
I don't give a fuck.
Where were your back?

4309
02:59:53,340 --> 02:59:56,080
Keep your eyes open and get the fuck on 
snap.

4310
02:59:56,120 --> 02:59:58,980
Chatham fucking twitter.
Stay black.

4311
03:00:03,670 --> 03:00:08,670
Oh,
he is so fuck.

4312
03:00:08,910 --> 03:00:10,320
He's the best ever,
man.

4313
03:00:10,380 --> 03:00:12,030
That's the funniest guy ever lived.
