8lMKflYXWfM.txt

Speaker 1:          00:00:01       On ustream and that should be it. I'm a fucking technology monkey. Sun Low. Let's see. Second that'll go. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to a. What week is it? I don't know. Fucking one of the uh, ustream podcast and the itunes podcast, which has taken over and popularity far more popular on the itunes than the Ustream for all those fine folks out there listening on your way to work or when you're supposed to be doing work or when you're supposed to do on homework or whatever the fuck you doing. Thank you very much for tuning in. This show is now officially sponsored by fleshlight. I don't know if you knew about that, Tommy. I'm here with my Buddy Tommy Segora, Aka Tommy. Tommy is here because, uh, his, uh, well, first of all he's here because he's hilarious. Standup comedian and a good buddy of mine and because his CD comes out today, he's got a new CD called thrilled you got to where I do, I do with folks.

Speaker 1:          00:01:07       That's Tommy. It looks like Michael Jackson, but it's Tommy. Yeah, it's me. Yes. Very funny. Tommy and I met when I was doing the, uh, I was doing this tour for a maximum and Bud light and uh, me and Charlie Murphy and John Have Heffron and we would travel across the country. We did like 20 different stops and we, uh, we use local guys like every, every place we went to we had a local comic would go up and perform and Tommy was the funniest of all of them. He, he was really, I was really shocked. Like every now and then you see a comedian, it's uncomfortable. So that's why you right here. But every now and then you see a comedian, you know and you're like, oh, I didn't even know this guy was around. How's he fucking so funny. You know, most of the time, like when someone's funny, like, you know, you know who they are, you know what I'm saying here about them already.

Speaker 2:          00:01:54       Yeah. Oh totally. Yeah. I appreciate it.

Speaker 1:          00:01:56       You hear that Echo. That's my other computer in the background. But um,

Speaker 2:          00:02:01       yeah, no, I, I, when you travel and you see people and you're like, hey, where do you go up? Because I've never seen you, especially like when they live with,

Speaker 1:          00:02:09       but it's so rare when they're funny. That's the thing. It's like, you know, like most comics, like if you say like comics that you don't know what percentage of them aren't, don't make you laugh.

Speaker 2:          00:02:20       Percentage of companies don't make me laugh. Oh well. Up into like the 85th percentile.

Speaker 1:          00:02:25       It's a weird thing and I understand that comedy is different and there's, there's some things that some people like that I don't like or I liked that some people don't like. You know, there's a lot of infant tile, ridiculous, silly comedy. He can't turn up the microphone all the way to. I think it's on as loud as it can go. Ladies and gentlemen, hold on a second. Maybe there's some sort of an input. Is it really that low? Is that any better?

Speaker 2:          00:02:50       I know I need to project

Speaker 1:          00:02:53       this. I hope we're not. We're not in some weird thing here. It's on the blue snowball, right?

Speaker 3:          00:03:02       Yes, it's working.

Speaker 1:          00:03:05       Sorry. Is it really that low? Ladies and gentlemen, turn the microphone up a bit. I don't think I can. I don't think there's anything I can do other than where it's at right now. Some people say it sounds fine. Some people says it's pretty quiet. Well, do you have a volume on your motherfucking phone or whatever? You're watching this on [inaudible] work. That shit. Yo,

Speaker 3:          00:03:30       what happened? We have a little issue here. Little technological issue. Lost the screen.

Speaker 1:          00:03:41       Yeah. On with the show. Indeed. As this man said, we were just too far. All right. Well we're right up to it right now anyway. Um, the percentage of comics at suck, I would have to say it's probably like 80. It's probably like 80. Even that's just counting for district. There's a lot of people that I know are good. They're just not my style. I totally accept that and appreciate that. But like when you go on the road and you see someone and you know, you never heard about this guy before and you see them and they're hilarious. You're like, Whoa, how fun is that? It's fucking awesome.

Speaker 2:          00:04:11       It's the best thing. Yeah. Because even like sometimes you'll kind of like enjoy somebody. You can go like, uh Oh, that was a well written joke. That's good joke structure or something. But like when you actually turn up, like laughing, like you're grabbing your gut and you're just, that's hilarious. That's fun.

Speaker 1:          00:04:29       It's like you just found a gift, you know, it's because it's like, especially as Comedians, like you see everything comment or you see a lot of things come in rather. And like when you run into someone who's really funny, like it's like, oh here's another one that were out there. I know they're out there because you'll see so many guys that fucking suck and what they're talking about is just nonsense and it's just stupidity and you know, they're not even really thinking about what they're saying. It's not anything that they've really liked come to some weird conclusion. It's just a bunch of nonsense designed to make you laugh and that shit is hard to deal with over and over and over again. It makes you lose faith in it. And you wonder like for comics like shit, like what is it? Like, like, you know, coming up [inaudible] this day, you know, but when I was coming up it was, there was a lot more comedy clubs, a lot more different comedians to like to look at it. There was a lot of shit going on, a lot of action. It seems like there's way less action now. Oh definitely. Ms Dot way less good guys coming up or people coming up in general just seems to be a smaller community.

Speaker 2:          00:05:28       I think so, yeah. I mean nationwide, right? I think so, yeah. There's like, there's like a few places that are really like when you go to you're like, oh, this place has a good like comedy community. Like within it, you know, like I kind of felt that way and like Austin, I was like, they're really trying to like develop comics here, but I don't really feel that way in most places. Most places it's just like a, I don't know, it's like, it's like, uh, like the mall or you know, it's

Speaker 1:          00:05:58       fucking hard to do. It seems a lot easier than it really is. It's like once you get good at it, it kind of becomes easy. You're just kinda like, you know, you know, you understand what, what it takes to write a joke and it's, it's just a matter of putting in the time, putting the effort. But to get to a point where you're actually funny is it's such a long fucking process. Like people don't realize. I see a guy like, you know, anybody. Joey Diaz. Joey Diaz is a great example because Joey Diaz is fucking hilarious. But when I met Joey Diaz, Joey Diaz is not funny and that sounds crazy because he's one of the funniest people I've ever met in my life and he would say funny shit offstage, but he could never be that funny on stage and he could never make it happen. And somewhere along the line he just figured it out. He figured out how to be himself, who he is like in the parking lot at the comedy store. They figured out how to be that guy on stage and all of a sudden Bam. It was just, he nailed it, knocked it out of the park. But that's like the heart

Speaker 2:          00:06:50       seem to do, right? I mean that's, that's super hard. Like [inaudible] I made people now who I'm like, you, you talked to them and you're like, oh you're really funny. But then it's like they're there too forced and contrived on stage and you're there. You got to figure out how to make the guy who you are off stage just walk on.

Speaker 1:          00:07:08       There was a guy that was doing standup or I thought was really funny, but he was doing this weird thing where he was talking so fast to do take this breath in between his essays and then the government if the government want to do this Obama situation with gays in the military and they and like he was going so fast, like he kept taking this like in, but it was like audible really loud like a singer. And especially if you're begged, like you could focus on something like that. Look for. You could forget exactly what he's saying. He's saying it down five, four, three, two. I would just focus on his crazy, that little breath thing that he does. You know, it's just Joey Diaz. When, when I talked to him about it and I, you know, we've talked about it a bunch of times, he says that what happened was he just realized how to not give a fuck.

Speaker 1:          00:07:54       He, like he said he was too concerned with agents and managers and all that shit and he was too concerned with people giving them advice and he said it took, you know, like realizing somewhere along the line, just realizing that these guys were all a bunch of dummies, like seeing a bunch of them get fired, seeing managers and agents fail miserably and fall by the wayside and executives get fired and the people that hire people turn to drugs and become fucking chaos and mass. And so he just had to realize like, oh, these aren't like intelligent. This isn't like a, a really like, well set up artistic environment. They don't know what they want. They just want you to kill, you know, and they can tell you all day. They want you to be squeaky clean, you've got to do this. But if you're dirty and you destroy, they want, you know, so you've got like Katt Williams or you know, of course Eddie Murphy and Chris Rock and all these different guys who have had, you know, Sam Kennison and dirty acts that, but so hilarious that were, they were undeniable.

Speaker 1:          00:08:51       So even in the era back then, which was pre internet, you know, the Kennison days were all pre-internet, which is way harder to be dirty because you only had hbo. That was your only outlet for people to find out who the fuck you were. Which is scary if you think about it. Oh yeah. The comparison to like what we have today, you know. But even then, man, all you have to do is be so good that they don't give a fuck so good that they let it go. And Joe, he figured out how to do that, you know. But for the longest time, man, he couldn't do it. It's, it's hard to find a guy who gets it right. It hard. There was another guy, Kurt Metzger, I worked with him in Montreal this weekend. Fucking hilarious. Very funny. He's very funny. Super Funny, really good. There's just, um, there's just not enough.

Speaker 1:          00:09:30       There's not, there's not enough good guys out there and he's another guy probably awake when you saw and you're like, who the fuck's this? Well, Ari had actually already told me he was funny. He's really funny. Yeah, we were working this, this little tiny club in Montreal. I did, um, this theater called metropolis is like a thousand seats or something like that. And then the day before we did this local club called the comedy works, which I used to do when I was living in Boston. I was living in Boston, one of my first road gigs. I used to go up to the Scott. Jimbo owns this club in Montreal. It's the best club ever, man. It's fucking this tiny little room. There's only like maybe 100 people can fit in. They're all stuffed into this place and it's just old school man. The microphone sucks. The wall behind you.

Speaker 1:          00:10:14       Stupid fucking curtains over the windows behind you. And they have them covered with these old dusty fucked up curtains. But it doesn't matter. It's the best. It's awesome. It's just this little tight place and he was a headline in there this week, Kurt Metzger, and he was really fucking funny and another one we hung out, you know, me and him and Ra went out and got something to eat and like I could tell right away. Here's another comment. He's, he's a real comment. Exactly. Yeah. There's just, there's like a. and it's cool like you really feel like, like you want to, when you meet guys like that, are you still in touch with them? You will be like soldiers on the battlefield, you know, you run into each other like, wow, here we go. We've got another one. What people don't realize about comedians and it sounds, screw that we're talking about this, that and making a big deal out of it, but there's not that many of them.

Speaker 1:          00:10:59       When you look at the world, okay, look at the United States. Let's just look at our country. Three hundred million people in the United States. How many comedians there might be a thousand, might be a thousand professional comedians at 300 million. How many of them are actually funny? It might be 300, maybe 300 out of a thousand. And that's being generous. Yeah. So there's 300 people at a $300 million. That's one in a million. Yeah, that's bananas. I said bananas again early. I said bananas like Fifty Times last week. And I said I wasn't gonna say it this way, that's my latest thing, man. Whenever anything is crazy, I go 19 sixties on myself. I, I go, I repeat the shit out of, uh, out of control. Say something's out of control. And I say fired up. Well, the problem is when you do it in a two hour podcast once a week after a while, people like to, we shut the fuck up, but the bananas are, you're listening to a guy like say the same words.

Speaker 1:          00:11:56       It's like you realize when you do something like this, how important it is to vary, you know, your speech and not get locked into patterns of behavior. You know, you ever heard like rappers, who y'all. I'm saying, you know what I'm saying? I'm saying the Kimbo slice does. You know what I'm saying? Like every other word. And I'm Sam, he had to put these things on, you know what I'm saying? Like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Of course I've heard so many interviews with athletes would say that it's, it's know what I'm saying after everything. And what's hilarious is when you hear comics used nigger like, like a rapper will use nigger. And this Nigga tried to tell me, I'm like, Nigga, you better get the fuck out my face Nigga. I know what the fuck's going on Nigga. And like they'll, they'll say it's so many times and they'll say it on stage.

Speaker 1:          00:12:33       The way guys will say it offstage, you know, there's something that gets lost when you do that, you know, you got to recognize that like free speech offstage is not good enough to be bottled up and packaged. You know, you're going to sell it. You can't, you got to have a better economy of words. Like I'll catch myself sometimes saying fuck too much on stage because it's just natural because you do it in real life like this fucking guy in his stupid fucking idea. But you can't. If you do that, it, it, it fucks up the bits because you, the lows, any potential impact, you know, the concept. You people get distracted by you saying, even though this is just how you express yourself in a natural, people will get distracted if you use too many of the same words over and over again, like a swear like fuck, you know, if you use it over and over and over again, like in like more than one sentence, you could do it for one bit. Like if you're just so ridiculously upset at something, you know that you just. And it's part of what you're doing, but then you have to make sure that you, there's a peak and a valley in your app. You have to make sure that once you hit like all these extra fucks, like there's no fucks coming for awhile after that. Yeah. Yeah. Because

Speaker 2:          00:13:40       then like when you do it a lot also like in one bit, if you say fuck like 100 times, you realize that you're essentially, it's replacing other words that could make that bit funnier.

Speaker 1:          00:13:52       And it's more like an ah, it's like a replacement for a, like this a guy, um ha. So it's like you're just kind of admitting that you don't have a cohesive idea.

Speaker 2:          00:14:03       The other one, like I used to do this all the time and now I do it less, but I still catch myself going into it is saying like one of your saying a bit then going right at the end of it and you don't realize you're, you're saying it, but you're going because you're trying to basically validate what you're saying. So like, like sort of subconsciously I would say a sentence and be like, right? And then I walked in, right? And the guy was like, right? And then I listen to it. I'm like, that sounds fucking like, like an imposter

Speaker 1:          00:14:28       fucking idiot right now. That's why it's so important to listen to your shit. Oh yeah. So important to watch your stuff and listen to your stuff. And it's so painful. Like people think that comedians like, look, me up there. I'm killing when, when I watch my stuff, even stuff that I did that I like, I don't like watching it. Like even talking monkey's in space, which was like my best special. I don't like watching that fucking thing. It feels gross. I hate watching man. It's just a and, and then you start judging your bits and go, Ooh, I don't even have the new tagline when I did this. Like sometimes you'll do a bit and the right after you come up with his bed, it's like you know, you, you think you've got it nailed and you put it on a cd and then like a week later you have the best fucking tagline.

Speaker 1:          00:15:07       It changes the whole bit. It makes it so much better. You want to like go back in time. You want to, you want to rewind yourself and, and, and not release it. I started, I started on this. I already have like a few things I to too and I'm like, Oh man, I know. And people who don't do it don't understand how maddening that is. That's why I like a lot of comics have a hard time. Once you do your set, you just want to get out of there and move on with your life. You don't want to like really objective. We go over all the beats and trying to figure out what you did wrong and what you did right. But if you don't do that, man, it's, it's, it's just not as. It's not as good. You have to make sure that.

Speaker 2:          00:15:43       Yeah, you have to, you have to look at your stuff, man. This is the hope. Doesn't

Speaker 1:          00:15:50       volume meters or right. Way Up towards the red is like on the Austrian producer. That's how you get it. As loud as we can. People still complain about this shit. I, uh, you know, the, the fact that I have brian that he records almost all my sets that's so huge for that. It's helped me so much

Speaker 2:          00:16:05       that I'm super and also like there's little things that he does. Like I'm just saying, I guess it's just an all around appraiser Brian, but like, it's so cool. I always dug like the posters that you'd like, just. Yeah. Yeah. All those, those are awesome. That makes those, did they really know? And he captured a lot of cool shit offstage. Yeah, that's awesome man.

Speaker 1:          00:16:25       It's like one of the best things about the internet is being able to connect with people like that. Just Weirdo fucking creative people, you know. And then in Brian's case he brought up working for me.

Speaker 2:          00:16:33       I think you're, do you think like of all like the working like big name comics, you're probably on top of it the most, right? Like media, like Internet stuff,

Speaker 1:          00:16:44       cooks probably better at it than me. The, the whole like twitter shit. Now the reason why I even got into that is because I saw what it was doing for him. That's a fact for like I was feeling people compare, like try to compare him to other comedians with shady, uh, reputations, you know, I say Dan has done a lot more for comedy then like I was like by a long shot because he's, he's like opened up people's eyes to what you could do yourself. Sure. Because before that, the, the reality is none of us are the type of guys that are going to be self promoters. Like comics are not self promoters. It's just not normal. He's an aberration. Dane Cook is an unnatural thing, like, well, I don't know if it's an unnatural thing, but it goes contrary to what I was talking about.

Speaker 1:          00:17:26       I was doing the sit Rosenthal show on the radio before I did this and we were talking about like he was saying, rank yourself amongst comedians and comedians. That's the last thing you ever want to think about is where do I stand? You know, is this guy better than me or that guy better than me? You don't want to judge yourself. You just want to just try to concentrate all your energy on doing the best shit. The last thing you want to concentrate on is pumping up your own ego and you know, just or even judging yourself at all would judge the material. Go over the material, look at it, try to make it better, but always be focused on that. Like the like putting out the best shit. That's what you're focused on. Not like where you fit in with everybody else. That's, that's like an an enemy. That's like the enemy of creativity is that kind of ego shit. When you get involved.

Speaker 2:          00:18:11       Yeah. Yeah. And it's also like the one thing, I mean I always feel like the one thing you can control like for sure is what you're writing and doing. So it's like, like you really can't control the other shit. Like if somebody wanted to put you on the 10 best list of comics,

Speaker 4:          00:18:27       right? Or like the tendons right before you that you hate, that you hate, like you think he sucks, it's out of your control.

Speaker 2:          00:18:34       So I think it's absurd to even like I saw, I just saw a list of the 10 comics to watch and it was like, like I, you know, I mean it's all subjective but I'm like, this is, this is absolute. Like some of it was cool and so it was like, who is this? Why are they. I know that one.

Speaker 1:          00:18:48       Mercy. No, it's doing something like that. Why don't they, I mean there's always got to be a number, you know, the fucking seven comments you want to look out for. How much does do something on someone you think is funny? You know, this whole like what's the best bands? The bands that you like, I'd probably think fucking suck, you know, and there's a lot of shit that I liked that sucks. A lot of people think it's sucks, you know, like you know, that of the fray, how to save a life is one of the gay songs of all time. Alright. But I fucking like it. I like it. I know people say it sucks. I know that if I played it at a party with all my friends, they'd be live. I prayed it loud. They be like, what the fuck are you doing? But I,

Speaker 2:          00:19:26       I love it. There's a lot of like, like nineties R and B, that

Speaker 4:          00:19:31       shit like swv once swd sisters with voice, it's absurd and I will fucking crank that shit in my car and go like, give me, give me, give you a sample of it. There's, should we find it yet? There's supposedly some way that I can. I can do some fucking screenshot here

Speaker 1:          00:19:54       and drag the stuff in, but I fucked it all up so I don't know how to do that. But we'll go to youtube. The beautiful thing about youtube is you could find pretty much anything but sisters with voices are your sisters' stipend. SWV is be better that way. Okay. SWV. Yeah. You're gonna. I mean it's gonna be ridiculous to you. Okay. There's one where right here. Human Nature, man. Here we go. Ladies and gentlemen brought to you by the power of cable.

Speaker 5:          00:20:27       This is Michael Jackson. They're using a loop from that. They ripped off Michael Jackson and they're fishing the fishing and the matching brooks brothers gear on. Oh Shit. This isn't bad enough.

Speaker 1:          00:20:55       Sorry fellow. That's not bad enough that you're gonna. Show me something bad. It's got to be really bad. Not Good. Not Good. Not Good. That atrocious. Do you let you ever hear like what the fuck? It's hard out here in the D. There's a fucking rap song. Hold on.

Speaker 4:          00:21:14       Oh, and do you ever. Do you ever do dig like a. A lot of people on the Internet know what I'm talking.

Speaker 1:          00:21:18       It's hard out here in the D is like one of the worst fucking rap songs ever. Like, it's so bad. It's these. Did these Detroit people. Fuck. Where is it? It's not. That's not it. You dig this though? It's so bad. It's awesome. Yeah.

Speaker 4:          00:21:38       Do you like ever like, like a techno song?

Speaker 1:          00:21:40       Sometimes. Most of the time I find that stuff to be logged. Annoying.

Speaker 4:          00:21:44       Yeah. Yeah. But so every once in a while one will catch you. Right. You know, it's different though. If I'm hammered in matter club. Oh yeah. Then you'll just get interested in music that you ordinarily wouldn't get interested in because it's so cold in the day. Is that it? Is it so cold in the day? It might be. Right sir.

Speaker 1:          00:22:07       This is another thing. This so called in the day. Is this something that you should have never found out about that? Here it is. This is it. So cold and I'm no saint, you know, China to some dude trying to get people to watch them. There's all these kids that have shows on the Internet. It never known any. Stumble on one. Like this guy, this guy, he's got 300 fucking thousand views on one of these videos. Here it is. It's so cold in the date and this is so bad. Dude,

Speaker 5:          00:22:42       I don't know why this is broadcast. You mean

Speaker 4:          00:23:23       I didn't meet immediately. A gentleman. I don't know what I'm doing here.

Speaker 5:          00:23:27       You should have. It's so cold and z. that's for real. Wow. How'd you find those? Dude? Why don't we have to.

Speaker 1:          00:23:45       I have to figure out how to do this. There's no way, Brian, when Brian not here, Brian is off at some fucking crazy adventure and when Brian's not here, I have no idea how to work all this shit, but I do have some fucking serious high tech MP3 type recorder shit now. And these regular microphones, if you guys have any complaints, I love to hear them. You know, if you have a problem with a sound or, or, or anything else, like fucking keep it coming. I like to try and make this thing as good as I can. Anyway. So what we're talking about comedians and uh, I was telling you earlier. Oh the fleshlight that was the thing I want to talk about. Have you ever fucked one of those? No House. Can I ever fucked one of those? You know, is this really a sponsor of yours?

Speaker 1:          00:24:30       Yes. Really? Yes. I'm sponsored now by much to the fucking angst of my management company. Wow. This is Jennifer [inaudible] butthole. Magenta is butthole. Yeah. I don't know. It smells like someone's butt hole. What? Just rubber? Just, it doesn't smell. It doesn't smell good. Well, you could always put some rosy side, but um, these fucking things. My manager was. This is the craziest thing that anyone has ever given me. When they give me advice and I'm like, it's, it's a masturbation to it. What's the big deal? And he's like, well, it's pornographic because I guess it's like a rubber pussy. And I go, how's it pornographic? I, it's a masturbation tonight. How's that pornographic? It's a fake vagina. He goes, well, you use it when you watch pornography. That doesn't make sense. Look terrible places that you use it while you watch pornography. And then our, she feared goes.

Speaker 1:          00:25:25       So by that standard, my sock is pornographic. Just, you know? Yeah. What the fuck? Bad. Come on. That's, that's, that's pornographic or rubber buddle. Then my stomach is really pornographic. The idea is that we're still living in this childish world. We're supposed to pretend that you don't masturbate and if you're admitting the cms rate, which we all should, there's nothing fucking wrong with it. This is way better than jerking off. Can I see it? Oh my goodness. This is so good, man. It's way better. You squirt some lube in there and you fuck the shit out. Have you done it? Yeah, I've done it. That's awesome. Not this one. Not that I wouldn't do that to you. Thanks man. Oh Wow. It's really soft. Oh Dude. It's the. They have some sort of special patent on what the vagina and butthole rubber is made out of.

Speaker 1:          00:26:11       It's like some special fucking thing. That's great, man. It's outstanding. It's 100 times better than beating off and I'm not joking. Really. I'm not. I'm not being a sell out here. Look, don't buy if you don't want to buy it. I'm not saying that should go out and buy it. I mean, there's a lot of other things. I'm sure that you'd probably need your life more than you need a rubber vagina, but if you're in the market from rubber vagina, I fucking highly recommended. If you're the type of dude who jerks off and we all, especially if you do it, you didn't say like a daily thing to you. That's way better. It's, I can't even, without getting too graphic, I can't even describe how much better it is. All I'm saying is lazy checks. Okay. You're going to have to pick up your game.

Speaker 1:          00:26:50       This is just the beginning. Okay. Once they figured out this, what they figured out that the most difficult part, they figured out a way to master an artificial vagina. It's, they mastered it. It's really fantastic. Fantastic. I'm not bullshitting you. It's not like some hard rubber thing. It feels like a pleasant. It's incredible. I will sample one and we will get you one and we will, uh, we'll get him. One will have a Chris from a fleshlight send one over to Tommy and Tommy will come back on the broadcast in the future after he's fucked it up and it'll tell us all about it. It's, I mean, I'm telling you, man, for the longest time, and this was Chris, the guy who worked for the company was describing it to me for the longest time. Women always have vibrators and dildos and this and that and rabbits and, and the, the fucking Sybian no one ever had anything like that for dudes.

Speaker 1:          00:27:38       It's kind of weird, man. Well, not only that, it's like you're some kind of a fucking loser if you go and buy any of that shit anyway. If you're one of those dudes who goes out and buys like, like a rubber rubber pussy to fuck at some sex shop, you know, most guys are never gonna get past the embarrassment of walking through those beads in a sex shop. It's horrifying. And trying out all the different rubber pussies, you know what I'm saying? Even know which ones for you, you know, oh, this one vibrates. Do you really want your Dick to vibrate? No, probably not. It's like, it's like you're, you know, you're fucking a shaver. Why? Why? Why would you want it to vibrate? No. So you'd have to like either that or you'd have to go get what? A magazine that reviews, hi, my name is Harry and I fucked everything because this is what I think, you know, it's fucking.

Speaker 1:          00:28:27       It was difficult. But because of the Internet now all you have to do is you'd go to fleshlight.com or whatever and you order it, you know? Yeah. It makes total sense actually. Is it, is it easy to clean up to. Yes. It's very easy to clean up. I think this thing is getting me off of here. No, no. Okay. I don't understand. Yeah, it's super easy to clean up. You, uh, you unscrewed the top, you put it in the foss and cleans it out. It's fucking, it's nothing. I mean it's kind of gross. You feel like a total loser and once you just shot a load and post you never feel like a winner. But that's but actually goes along with all masturbation. I always feel like a loser when my load shooting. The whole joke about it, a whole bit about no matter what, like when it's over, like relevance, no matter who you are, you're a loser.

Speaker 1:          00:29:13       You can be Michael Jordan when you're just sitting there with a load in your stomach, you get that heavy breathing kind of comes to an end. And you know, I always say that I feel the same way after I jerk off as well as what I, uh, when I play xbox for like nine hours in a row, that same feeling, you just, what am I doing versus loser, you're a loser. You got a bunch of shit you were supposed to do and now it's two in the morning and you have to go to bed and you didn't do shit. You fucking loser. I'm weak. That's what I tell him. I said, if you're a person, do you, uh, do you struggle a lot of comics struggle with self indulgence? Do you struggle with that big time? Yeah. Well God, that's definitely probably so hard when no one's telling you what time you have to get up. It's so hard not to just get up at noon, just beat off all over yourself and go right back.

Speaker 2:          00:29:56       You're describing like the last few years of my life and I'm with that. I'm like that with everything. Like I like to. It's all about like sleeping in, jerking off, eating good food and anything that feels good. I'm surprised I don't have needles in my arms sometimes.

Speaker 1:          00:30:13       We were, you and I were on the road once and we decided to get krispy Kreme donuts at like 1:00 in the morning we went off. Where the fuck was that man? Was that Tampa? Was it? Wait, no, if it was. Yeah. Well it wasn't crispy cream though, right? Or was it Krispy Kreme? I think it was or maybe it wasn't. It was some, some awesome donuts. Whatever the fuck it was. But dude, we attack those bitches and we both knew that we really shouldn't be doing it. And you had to slip like, all right, fuck it, let's go. It was just like as if I asked you to do go do some crank with me. I haven't been doing it, but fuck it. Let's go ahead,

Speaker 2:          00:30:44       but then I'm most like, like if somebody gives me permission, that's what it's like. I'm kind of like going through life waiting for somebody to give me permission. If somebody is like, do you want to do this because I'm going to do this, then I go, I have no control.

Speaker 1:          00:30:58       Yeah. What is that man? What is that about? Comedians that just like I'm looking for any excuse to do the wrong thing. That's what feels good. What feels good to do the wrong shit? It's because what? Because what makes you become a comedian is you're resisting everything that everybody else wants you to do. You're resisting resisting, being polite because you're thinking route shit, which is why you're funny. You're saying that roots shit to get the laughs from people. So you're disturbing. Everybody know, so you're, you're, you're resisting. Like the way to become good and it become funny is to be the guy that's willing to say that shit. I mean that's why so many people say about comedians like, like, oh dude, I can't. You say shit that I think about all the time, but I never have the guts to say. I mean, how many times do people say it's absolutely about, especially if you nail some current events issue they do.

Speaker 1:          00:31:45       That's exactly what I thought, but I didn't have the balls to say that, that, that willingness to say shit that's like inappropriate or that other people would think was offensive. That's like what makes you a comic in the first place? Sure. You know, so it's like, it's all like a part of your whole system. I go, you want to your, it's almost like we're designed to like not fit in, were designed to like just step away from all of it and poke fun at it. So it makes it so hard to fucking get your shit together. Yeah, it does man. This is so hard to be disciplined and to just show up for anything on time.

Speaker 2:          00:32:18       But like, but you got to have like you have discipline though, right? I mean as a,

Speaker 1:          00:32:22       I have some, I'm not the best at it. I, I forced myself to do certain things because I know that like, like with my body, I'm a naturally, uh, like I have a lot of energy, you know, and I have a lot of aggressive energy and I, my whole life I've been doing martial arts since I was a child, so it's like literally there's

Speaker 6:          00:32:40       been no time or I haven't done it that something, whether it's kickboxing or Jujitsu or something, there's that explosive, like expenditure of energy has always been a part of my life. So if I take time off and I don't do it for like three or four days or something like that, I started getting really antsy and I get this buildup and I just fucking, I just, I just want to get it out and I get annoyed and traffic and I snap at people when I shouldn't be snapping. I get upset about things that I shouldn't get upset at, you know, but when I'm not doing that, when I'm, when I'm training all the time and I'm, I'm, I'm even down just so mellow. It's like I feel like I can be me now, go enjoy life more. I feel like there's less stress in my body so I can interpret the outside stress way better.

Speaker 6:          00:33:22       So it's almost like dictated by your, by your, the way you operate to be that way. Well, you know, and it's also, you know, the way my mind developed to growing up I, we moved a lot around a lot and I don't know, my dad, I haven't talked to him since I was six years old or seven. I haven't seen him since I was six. I haven't talked to him since I was seven. So I was raised by my stepfather and we moved around a lot so I always had to like, like fight against a lot of kids in different neighborhoods. There's always a lot of bullshit that I had to fight against. So my, my instincts are always to resist all the shit that's going on because people are just going to say stupid shit and get you in bad situations. Like, so I grew up with that.

Speaker 6:          00:33:59       And then the physical thing, like fighting thing. So it's all was resisting. Everything's resisting, which is, you know, terrible because then you resist your own direction and your own ideas and you can have like a plan like, Hey, I'm going to take care of my body, I'm going to, you know, eat certain foods because they're healthy, they're going to work out, you know, in a certain time every day because that's what I really need to get done. I'm going to start writing material every day even though it's for you and it's a good thing and you'll enjoy every single moment of all of it. You still resist doing it because it's some sort of a plan and anything that's a plan is like all the other stupid shit.

Speaker 2:          00:34:32       Yeah, yeah, exactly. Yeah. And that's Kinda like, I think every comic has that resistance to for the most part, like this is how this is the status quo,

Speaker 6:          00:34:44       a big part of it, right? Yeah.

Speaker 2:          00:34:46       That's kind of like why you're a standup because you, you, you, it's weird because like the resistance makes you a comic and at the same time to a degree, if you're resistant to too much, it will hold you back from doing well.

Speaker 6:          00:34:58       Yeah, that comedy, but you have to realize somewhere along the line that the reason why you got into comedy is probably a bad reason. And for most of us it's like we want an unnecessary amount of adulation. We want an, an, you know, we want more attention than the other people do because we feel like we didn't get it when we were young. Right? Crazy buildup. But then somewhere along the line your motivation has to switch. You have to kind of understand what it really is. You know, the way that, what I always say about it is like at a certain point in time there, there's got to be a transition in your life as a comedian where you start doing it for the work and for the art and for the creation of something that joy and making something that people enjoy instead of

Speaker 1:          00:35:38       doing it so that people will like you doing it so that you can get all this attention and adulation on stage, you know, because that's what, when you won the beginning, you just want to be the fucking man and just want to get out there,

Speaker 2:          00:35:47       kill you want, do you want approval? We want people to be like your great. And then if you have a great set and people tell you stuff and you realize how validating it was, then you, then you realize how desperate you were. You know what I mean? Like when you feel so good, like you're so valid, so happy by that, that great show early on, you just like, how bad did I need that rubbing that I fucking need people to be like, oh, you're the. You're so amazing.

Speaker 1:          00:36:19       It's weird though because that's the only thing that really creates comedy though. Otherwise you probably are not going to be motivated enough to go through the beginning. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because how brutal the beginning. It's awful. It's awful, man. People don't know how painful it is to Obama on stage and how deserving it is. Like you fucking deserved a bomb when you know you really do deserve it. You know when you're bombing, it's because you fucking really do suck and you're supposed to fill that shitty because you're not supposed to be demanding attention. You're not supposed to be with a microphone with an amplified voice. You're not hearing opinions. Not that interesting. And all these people hear that and it just drives me fucking nuts, man. You're not well thought out you. You haven't lived that much. Probably if you started young enough, you don't have that much experience.

Speaker 1:          00:37:04       You don't know what you're talking about. Fucking 21 years old. You think you're smart, but you're not. You know, because like when you. It's like being your age now. When you look back at yourself 10 years ago, he's like, I'm a fucking idiot. Is there anything worse than 21 year old kids that think they have the fucking political system? Wired talk about politics on stage. Oh, it's the worst man. It really tears you up. It's so silly. It's like it's one thing if they have a valid point or a silly point or something like that, but when they start telling you what's wrong with Republicans and the Democrats are trying to do this, but the Republicans are trying to do that and they're stopping them and they're like, what are you fucking what? Yeah, it's, it's no. It's almost like I'm at a loss for words sometimes. You asked me fucking old ass shit for me to take you serious. When it comes to politics, you have to know that you've been paying attention to this at least at least abstractly for fucking decades because you have to be old

Speaker 2:          00:37:58       in order to get to have even a somewhat objective, like unemotional opinion about it. Young people just go like, this is fucked up, man. Like they're not looking at it for what it really is. They're looking at it from their hardcore bias towards one side or the other. They're not telling you what really is going on. They're just like, I really disagree with what the other people are doing. Which is like, that's your. That's just your fucking opinion.

Speaker 1:          00:38:21       Do you guys hear that water? Is that water annoying? Mrs Rogan's running the fucking hose. Essentially low red podcast situation. Although let me tell her to stop taking.

Speaker 2:          00:38:36       Oh, Tommy talked about your childhood. My childhood, it was really bad. That was beaten and hit a lot and I did a lot of drugs. Stick to the script. Oh, that's nice. Oh Wow. That was quick. No, no water. They do

Speaker 1:          00:38:56       near the water. There was water going on in the background. This is from my days working on fear factor. We always have to check for sound issues in the background. Like occasionally it'll be planes with flowers have to stop filming. I hear that sound that it starts to distract the shit out of me, but that's how I run my house folks when I'm fucking iron fist. Right when I'm doing a podcast will be no watering the plants. God dammit. I'm, so we're talking about needy, being needy, being a comedian. The worst is when people don't recognize that and they don't change and they keep that goofy fucking ego, like into their thirties and forties, you know, and they're still trying to be the fucking man.

Speaker 2:          00:39:34       What I really hate is the, um, like, like what I call the Rah Rah comics. Like, like they have like a fake enthusiasm. Yeah. Or, or a fake. What's the worst is fake and ray.

Speaker 1:          00:39:48       Oh, I guess one dude specifically who drives me crazy and I'll tell you when I don't want to be.

Speaker 2:          00:39:54       I mean, yeah, I don't want anything. I'll tell you, I had a guy, uh, I will even tell you where. But uh, I'll tell you afterwards, uh, that opened for me that his whole thing was like, fucked up. This is man. And like it was just like they, there were these contracts contrive rants about like the man and how he was such a fucking rebel and like he got, you know, on the crowd is like, Eh, I'm like, you're like, dude, what you did is you just gave a stump speech, like, you know, you're running for office up there. But in his mind he is a brilliant revolutionary comic, you know, that's for me. Like the most pain

Speaker 1:          00:40:29       once in the dude actually said this to the audience, he said something stupid, something political. And then he paused and he goes, that usually gets an applause break. He actually said that. That's great. Could you imagine, could you imagine even thinking that way? Like thinking like why are you not giving me my claps? I deserved claps. This is that. We have to agree on this point. We should all agree on this. Like, you know, a pause, breaks have to come. You can't expect them. Oh my God, you can't be the look and forum. That's gross. Honestly, if it

Speaker 2:          00:41:01       ones that like I have gotten, are never ever like, did you think they were going to happen? They're like, it's always like just a natural thing, you know, and you're like, wow, I can't believe that's the line. Or that's the point of view that gets an applause break. It's so crazy that somebody like crafting them that craft and applause.

Speaker 1:          00:41:22       A friend of mine when I was coming, when I was covered up, he used to say when people start clapping, you got to pause and just hold it and they'll keep clapping and a lot of times you'll get an applause

Speaker 4:          00:41:34       break when you wouldn't have gotten one that's holding the fuck. Is that better for them because they're all in there together. That's ridiculous.

Speaker 2:          00:41:42       You'll see to the uh, uh, the mugging for like when the punchlines not that good. And then some, some comics will like say the punchline and then the crowd is like kind of laughing and then they'll give them the like, uh, like their cause and a smile. Like that's where it was and see if they'll come along for it. Or the worst is like set is over and you'll see somebody kind of like force, like I'm done. Like let's force how much you're going to respond at the end of my set. And those kinds of stand there. So the crowdfunding.

Speaker 4:          00:42:12       Have you ever seen a guy asked for a standing ovation?

Speaker 1:          00:42:16       It was the funniest shit ever. I can't. That's so terrible. I've seen guys like the stage to go. Ladies and gentlemen last night I had a show wasn't even as good as this. I got a standing ovation so I don't even know how.

Speaker 1:          00:42:31       What the fuck is this guy doing? He was like one of those singing comedians. He would go up and sing songs. He would pretend he was like, this guy. I like. It wasn't even like really funny. I was just like, he could sound like those guys. Oh No. Last night I was like a silly thing to worry about. You know? It sounds like. It's like, why do you care about fake enthusiasm? You know, why do you care about that? The reason why you care about that is because you realize that someone's operating on a level that only works against someone who doesn't know that it's a trick, but to everybody else who does it doesn't work. The only time it gets us is someone who really, really knows. The trick is it's got to be real. It's got to be a real genuine thought that this guy has. It's really funny and well put together and then it'll get us. So it's like when we see like an audience laugh at something that's not funny to us. Like it's almost like insulting.

Speaker 2:          00:43:24       Yeah, it is. It's exactly what it is. It's like, you fuck you trying to get me to laugh with that. Yeah. You know, you know that it's a trick. Like if you can sense, you're like, that's what he just did was he just, you know, he just waves his hands like that, you know, you know that it wasn't like genuine. That's the thing is that you can, you, when you do it long enough and you see it long enough, you can tell when it's genuine, when it's really like somebody's point of view.

Speaker 1:          00:43:47       No. Uh, one of the weirdest things about Tommy is Tommy is actually married to a comedian and she's fucking really funny. And I saw her for the first time. Was it like last Thursday? What's your wife's name again? Christina [inaudible]. Jetski. Yeah. She doesn't keep Tommy [inaudible] name. Notice that. Who's wearing the pants in the house? Huh? Let me know. She name her last name is ridiculous. Last name is completely absurd to try and keep that stupid shit.

Speaker 2:          00:44:14       She's been doing standup for like, you know,

Speaker 1:          00:44:17       eight years or something like you don't want to lose that fucking giant.

Speaker 4:          00:44:22       Maybe that's her fucking list of them. It's so funny. Maybe that's what's been holding her back. Isn't that amazing?

Speaker 2:          00:44:27       I know, I know. I've been to and I took, I had a really fucking hold her down, like to check to get even

Speaker 1:          00:44:32       like a, the do the driver's license changed and all this because she was just like, it takes a lot of work. Yeah. It was like

Speaker 2:          00:44:38       fucking changed.

Speaker 1:          00:44:41       I want to. Oh, you bitch and no hype. None of that shit. That's just, that's weak. I know a dude who was a comic in New York and he did the hyphen thing and he took her name, last ads, fucking unforgivably. He was a comic. That's not just a comic, but unestablished comic. I mean this is a guy who had a good following. Really? Yes. You had a good following. He had done a bunch of TV shows he had done like the evening at the Improv sort of circuit. He could headline, he would headline and clubs around town. So he had like, he had like a real reputation of following and this fucking guy took his wife's name last. It was ridiculous. That's the death of him, right? That's the. Eventually she wanted to break it up with them and that was the death. It was even weirder still because this guy used to get on stage and proclaimed himself to be a feminist.

Speaker 1:          00:45:30       That's great. Which is ridiculous for women. Okay. Just like, it's just as ridiculous to like be like all into being an American, you know, like in America for sure is the best country. But guess what? Douche bag, you know, you were born here, you know, you didn't do anything to make this country's awesome. Yeah. Well, what'd you do? What did you do to make this the best, you know? Did you, were you a part of the declaration of independence? Did you, you know, come on man, you're proud of being born a certain patch of dirt that's so it makes no sense. You have respecting the ideals and respecting what it, what it is to you and, and, and being proud to be a part of what's supposed to be the civilization that, that set the cost of humanity. That's what we're supposed to be where the people that moved from everywhere else, what America's supposed to be as were the people came from everywhere else and came to this one spot. So the ideal of it should be like, you should, should have some some pride in the ideal, but I think that somehow or another you're better because you're from this dirt and you've got a problem with some other dudes from that dirt, like the fuck

Speaker 2:          00:46:31       you have no credit or blame for where you're born ever. Like it's absurd to think that like it's why you can go, you know what? Like people that are born in the Congo, you're like, that fucking sucks man. That guy did nothing to deserve being born in a horrible place. But also like you didn't do anything amazing to be born in fucking New York. Great, great

Speaker 1:          00:46:51       to have a vagina. You didn't, you, you didn't ask to be a woman. It's all by chance to be a feminist, like to only like being like feminine values and pushing forth. I understand that you think that you're fighting against something. I totally understand that, but we should all be against oppression for everyone, not just oppression for women. It's like to concentrate on that. Just as a group, like every feminist I've ever met to a woman and I've only met two, have been really fucking annoying habit. Probably went more than two. I know they were horrendous. I had an argument with the comedy store, some crazy lady who started insulting me. I tried to be like super nice to her and she is a video of it online. She's like a performance artist slash feminist and she like, she fucking turned on me. I tried to like just talk to her. She was asking me questions and she actually interrupted the conversation than I was having with somebody else and she started talking to me and then somewhere along the line she was telling me to look in her eyes when I was talking to her and I just got, I got annoyed and I just started with happier, which is what I tend to do.

Speaker 2:          00:47:51       It's people or Douchey there. I think that whole like, I mean just I'm totally for like, like I said, nobody being discriminated against but like the people who really subscribed to like when it's a woman that really subscribed. So I got to be a champion of women, I find for the most part, most of the time it's women that were not ever like pursued like guys didn't really want them and they go like, it's never a really attractive woman that men like climbing all over. Yeah,

Speaker 1:          00:48:23       of course. To get to her and if she is, she's fucking crazy. It's out of her mind, her mind. It's like I always feel about the same way I was feeling about guys like Al Sharpton or guys like Jesse Jackson that are only involved in black and white issues, only involved in black people issues I'm like fucking really, really meant and they're only involved. Their only motivation fit and their only motivation is they love being on camera. Being on camera is the reason why we're going to expensive suits and driving beautiful cars. They have become the voice of discrimination. That's fucking ridiculous to have one person or two people and one of them. How about Al Sharpton? He starts his whole career, started out over a false rape accusation by some crazy chick that he got behind. They blamed it on white people. That's Tawana Brawley case, if you don't know about this. She smeared shit on her own body and claimed that she got raped and another store. You got to look it up. Google, Tawana Brawley, Al Sharpton. It's a hilarious story. It's like she falsely accused people of rape and he, you know, made his career out of getting in the public eye and you know, and making a big deal out of this and turning into this gigantic rape issue

Speaker 2:          00:49:33       that guy loves when, when any black person has something like

Speaker 1:          00:49:39       scandalous half he loves. Can you get to come on and be like, this is a travesty and he gets to talk. It's fucking bullshit, man. It's incredible. The, there's, there's two guys that are at the forefront of any like public issue that has to do with race and let's do a black and white people, but it does not race either because if there's some gigantic Vietnamese and white person issue this, I fucking doubt you're gonna. See Jesse Jackson on TV trying to support these Vietnamese people. Amen. Is that like they asked Al Sharpton one time, hey you. Because he came to the rescue of like some, I dunno, he can speak out because some kid I got kicked out of school for fighting at the school and as a black kid, of course I wouldn't care. I wouldn't show up if it wasn't a black person. So they go words, will you fucking would you do?

Speaker 1:          00:50:25       Would you care? Would you show if like if it was a white kid, he was like, absolutely. If they were to reach out to me, I would. That's complete bullshit. He will. Maybe it's not sharpton. He's so horesh. Then he might go on just for the opportunity to show that he's not just about black, but it's never happened, but nobody invites them. If a white kid gets in trouble, nobody's gonna Invite, I'm going to call them. I'm going to. Next time something happens, I'm calling and I'm going to ask him. The police show up, how do we fix that? How do we fix this ridiculous idea that black people and white people and that like, you know, there's a group of them and they're against a group of us and men against women against. I always say there's three types of people in the world, morons, assholes and people you can hang out with and that's reality and there might be some people in those people that you can hang out that you truly love.

Speaker 1:          00:51:14       There's a broad spectrum and other people that you can just tolerate. Sure, but that's the group. It's morons, assholes and people can hang out with and sometimes you can hang out with assholes if you know him well enough. He grew up with them and you can. There's a bunch of people that I grew up with but I still keep in touch with that I probably would never talk to if I didn't grow up with them because I used to do martial arts with and stuff and there's a bunch of dudes that I. I'm happy to talk to them and I'm happy to run my life. But the reality is if I met him today, then we wouldn't be such close friends. I know. Exactly. Yeah, absolutely. But the idea that we still do this in 2010, like is that going to change ever? We ever kind of like melt together to be one fucking big giant Mocha race, you know, the like a combination of everybody and just drop all the nutty diversity that causes problems.

Speaker 1:          00:52:00       I think in this country it's going to come pretty fucking close. People's love, diversity. You don't get me wrong. Like a lot of people say, oh, diversity doesn't cause problems. Racism comes problems. You know? It's actually a challenge to look at people and judge them not by, you know, as Martin Luther King said, by the color of their skin, by the content of the character. You know, that's a challenge and that's a good thing. And that's, and I agree. Yeah, definitely. For me it is. I like having a bunch of different people, but I don't know if like as a race, if we can figure out a way as a human race to not differentiate because of the way we look. I don't know if we can. I think it's unknown it like people's natural instinct is to like, and I'm adjusting well it's the judge, but it's also to be drawn to people like you.

Speaker 1:          00:52:39       That's just. And it's not even, uh, not to, not totally true because white, a white, a black guys like the fuck so many white girls sad about that. But they only go for the pigs. They know the ones they can get. Well, listen man, there's a lot of black dudes out there. Fucking a lot of white girls don't get crazy. No. Yeah, I, I agree. But they actually athletes like you ever seen like Michael Jordan, he's always with tents everywhere. He goes. Oh, but that's not Michael Jordan in his car, the 10. Oh, you know what I'm saying? But they're all white. He's got a bad ass. Like I think she's a Cuban bitch right now. She's out. Look at tiger woods. Oh, hot white chicks, you know? Yeah. Yeah. But tiger woods a amalgamation himself. But when you, when you, when you're out, you usually see the brothers with like a chick. I mean, you know, I'm, I don't go to the really good places, so

Speaker 4:          00:53:27       maybe it's running really good places, but I, I usually see them with fluff and animals, like the. Oh, oh yeah. It'll be like a chick who is driving him and be like, I just got to get some shoes and like a bad deal. Yeah. Look, I think water seeks its own level and if that other chick and get a good looking black man of fuck the shit out of her every week. And so what if he robs her every now and then, but don't even deal with that. But why do you think though, like if you were to walk into like a whatever, a room somewhere and there and it was at worst there were segregated when you wouldn't be the inclination that you would go towards the white people. I wish I wouldn't, but it depends on where I am. Even if it's a group of people, like if it's a group of comedians or something like that.

Speaker 4:          00:54:12       No, that's, it's like a group of comedians. It's like it's all the same. Right? Don't you feel like that you walk into a group, but if you don't know them, if you don't know anything about anybody. Yeah. You might go towards a white guy. Black guy would walk. It depends on how the black guys are dressed, dressed in suits and ties and they looked like a businessman and I might go to them, you know, but what if they all had on blue or red caps and Bandanas and then I will go to the white guy, I'll go the biggest, fattest white guy that stabbed behind him real close to the door. I try to angle myself trying to light up the room, you know, but I think like if you go in somewhere, I mean you'll see like, you know, Asians will be with Asians and Latin people and that's just like, well, I don't think it's also, uh,

Speaker 1:          00:54:54       a part of our natural inclination from back when we were know tribes of monkey people to, to select a group and just stay with that group and to assume that all the other groups are against you. You know, I mean, that's what we do with sports teams. That's what we do with state pride, you know, that's what we do in the north versus the south. It's really all the same thing. It's like it's all team shit. You know, there was a, um, there's a theory that we talked about on here, on the show before that this anthropologist came up with, it's called Dunbar's number and Dunbar's number is, it's all about the, uh, the number of people that you're capable of remembering and having stable relationships with and it's like 150 people is the most. And that's the theory. The theories. Oh, that's right or not, but it's pretty close in my opinion, knowing a lot of people, 50 people sounds about right.

Speaker 1:          00:55:43       It's like you can't have that many more people in your life because if you do, it's just too confusing and you don't have the capacity to remember it. It's almost like our culture has evolved so far that it's an operating system that our, our, our hard drive isn't capable of processing like, well we're, what our operating system is, is our operating system in our memory and our hardware is set up for living, you know, in fucking, you know, 10,000 BC throwing sticks with rocks, sharp rocks at the end of it. As at moving animals aren't. Our hardware has barely evolved past that. But our, our culture is just fucking light. There's 300 million of us all in this one continent and all supposed to be on the same team and there's so much disconnection that we try to get connections, like little small connections. The tribe itself is too massive, I think like thousands and thousands of years ago.

Speaker 1:          00:56:42       Like, you know, when people had, you know, we were tribes of hunters and gatherers and we're nomadic and everything like that. Like the bond between people in those tribes must've been so fucking intense, really so much better and more, more, more cooperation, more love for each other, more community than we have today. I mean, if you even fucking know your neighbors mad, you know. But I think partner not, I do not actually. This guy who lives over here is a Douche bag. I know that he lets his dogs go out and they bite other people's dogs and then, you know, I got this guy up the street. It's kind of a pain in the ass and this lady's weird and always asked weird questions. It's like I barely know these fucking people. I wave to a few of them. Some of them I like to see him, but it's not like it used to be man.

Speaker 1:          00:57:22       He used to live. I lived two doors down from other than department. Yeah. Like I live like a Jew, you know, the people next to another names. That's crazy. You live in it like a hotel. Yeah, I think it's, you know, part of it is that I feel like today it's almost like, uh, like we, we kind of almost in a weird way encourage people to be selfish. We tell people like, don't waste your time with that, don't do this and that for so and so. Like it's like, look out for yourself. Shit. Yeah. But it's kind of like, it's almost like that's because there's too many of us don't go out of your way for somebody, man, that's kind of the way it's. Our culture has evolved, uh, into this weird place to deal with the fact that there's so many of us. I mean, that's really what it is.

Speaker 1:          00:58:02       There's just too fucking many human beings in this one place. You know, for, for the way we're wired, not too many beans. I mean, obviously it's not sustainable if we keep growing at this rate, but the rate route, like right now we can, we have enough food if we concentrate on everything and do mean we're feeding people, you know, we are getting it done right now, you know, but man, it's, we're set up for much smaller groups. That shit will hypnotize me. You can't look at the. Sorry, I got distracted. Fuck with you. Then you won't be able to have a conversation in the chat. Will will blind you with its retardation.

Speaker 1:          00:58:35       There's some cool people in that trap. But there's some monsters in. There are some fucking monkeys. Um, so anyway, what the way we got onto this subject was feminism and the idea that uh, this poor fuck who changed his name was actually a male feminist. That, that's, that. That's. It's so depressing. Sad. He catch a woman being a woman, being a, uh, a mail list. Is that a, is that a word? You know, could you imagine a woman who likes ticks up for men's rights? That would be just a whore. That's all you would think about that girl, you know, maybe like a girl that survives on loads. If she doesn't have them, she doesn't live here. She's like a load vampire. Yeah. GimMe a Chug, chug, chug. You imagine what a ridiculous idea that a woman would be a mail list. You

Speaker 4:          00:59:22       know, and everybody would have such a definitive a masculine. What? I don't think there is even a word feminist is such a common part of our vocabulary. But the male pro male. Yeah. And he's like, it was as close as we got. But Eddie. Yeah. Eddie woman. That would be only into men. You would know. Chicks would trust that fucking bitch. No, she's doing, you know, like standing up for men's rights and chicken. No checks would trust her and guys would would just like, they'd be all over it, but they would also be something like, you would be like, something's wrong with this bitch. They would think it's a gimmick to which I thought with him, with this guy who would go on stage and talk about onstage, how he's a feminist and they'll just be like, oh my God. And just cheering like, yeah, like the broken ones, the broken ones that like to see a man who's fucking, who was weak and wearing a bridle and his mouth with marks on his ass.

Speaker 4:          01:00:18       Yeah, that's, you know, that's where it. Fuck this. A sad guy, man. The groups, men, you know, it's very hard to be a female comedian and this is where we all got started from your wouldn't, your wife wouldn't change her name? Yeah. So your, your wife, even though she won't change her name. Still very funny. And how long has she been doing comedy? Yeah, about eight years. Eight years. So you guys were like pretty similar timelines. How many years have you been doing though? A. Yep. What'd you meet her? I met her in a room doing a show. Yeah, fuck her. That night she ended up, she had a different boyfriend at the time. Really stole that bitch. Well now they, they broke up, I mean they would have anything to do with them breaking out now. Nothing, nothing. I always thought she was cool, you know, I thought they were cool, nice. And like I just, I thought I liked her, but I was like, that's just not gonna happen. Like they were together a while, man, like few years, you know? How did he fuck up? I don't know. I don't know how he fucked up. I mean I know that she left Tommy bonds into the picture. You just fucked up.

Speaker 4:          01:01:24       She just decided I guess that she wasn't going to marry that guy. So yeah, I came in there and I just took that shit. You just grabbed it? Yeah, just came in. Took when she was vulnerable. She got her on the rebound. Yeah, totally. I totally get. How many weeks after the breakup did you get her? I think it was like, oh, I think like a couple of months. Had past couple months. I think so she's a good person. She's thinking chicks get mad. So she gets so mad when you break up with a chick and you have a new one right away. They get angry. Yeah. Yeah. You know, a friend of ours is going through a situation like that right now. You can't really talk about it. Yeah. But his is access angry at him. Oh yeah. I've been. It's really high end. Like a motherfucker. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. She, um, whenever that can't be good man. Yeah. You know, this, the attachment that people have to each other so fucking intense that when they break, when someone breaks up with you then starts dating someone else

Speaker 1:          01:02:20       that you feel like they stole from you. Like they stole your happiness. You know? It's like, where's my fucking happiness and why am I. Why is my happiness been replaced with deep sorrow and sad, devastating feeling, man. Crushing Man. There's nothing actually like separate from that that makes you feel that quite that way. I can't think of anything. No death. Yeah, that's like death. It's like a death. A dog dies more than a dog dies. A friend die a friend. It's a devastating thing for people, man. It's because nature has its setup that we attach to each other and that we become addicted to each other and then we literally having that person in your life. It's like your whole formula. You're your whole like balance is. It's, it's. It requires having that person in the system. Did you have a whole system and that person you go to for your love and your sex and your and they like a lock into your grid.

Speaker 1:          01:03:12       Now when they're gone, it's like you have this gaping hole where that person used to be and most people just try to fill that bitch up real quick. What's the next one? Next one? Yeah, we got a leak. You know, plug it up. It's weird man, but it's all set up so that we breed. It's all these weird little biological tricks. You know, like the, the irrationality of the breakup, depression. It's so intense and you can tell people all day. It doesn't matter. There's other people out there you're going to do by doesn't matter. You can say. You can rationalize all day and, and there's gonna be times when people make phone calls. They should not fucking make, you know, it's over, but you'll have to, if I just call her, let me, maybe I never expressed myself. Maybe I never did it the right way.

Speaker 1:          01:03:53       And then you call it and then as that empty feeling where you're talking to them and they really don't want to talk to you. And they're like, listen, I think I need to be by myself. Let's see. Just give me a chance. Just try. No, I'm, I am with someone right now. And you're like, what? Then there what? Uh, and then, uh, and then you hang up and then you can't sleep and you're devastated. Like what a trick, what a terrible trick. And if you look back on some of the Times you've had those situations and how fucking happy you are that they, you broke up with that person. Sure man. How many times does that happen when you look back on? Like, like when I was 21 and my girlfriend broke up with me, I was so sad for like a week. Like I couldn't believe, I thought she was going to be the one, we're going to have babies together and shit.

Speaker 1:          01:04:31       But now I think back on what if I got stuck with her. Oh yeah. Alright. I think about just like times where like a without even, you know, when I was like wanting to pursue somebody in like maybe went out with him a few times and it didn't work out. It didn't evolve and how that was like, like, you know, it's like depressing. You're like, Oh, you've met and then you get to like, you sort of get to know the person from a distance you're like you imagined. But ended up like if it had worked out, I would be miserable today. Have you ever had an angry girlfriend? Uh, no. I've got a few angry ones. I've had a few anger ones to angry ones are so strange because you just tolerate like this, this yelling and this craziness in your life. Tolerate people getting pissed. You tolerate negativity and then you realize one day like you break up with them and you go, okay, the fucking has stopped them. I feel so much better. Like I was dating a fucking crazy person shaking your core. Yeah. I was dating some fucking, some monster, some, some deficit in my life, you know?

Speaker 2:          01:05:29       Yeah. I, I, uh, I lived with somebody. No, no, not, but not a girlfriend. Had Roommates who in one of my roommates dated a fucking monster. And uh, when they ended it, it was like the whole, like the whole apartment complex, calm down, like, you know what I mean? It was supposed to be this chill. Yeah. You were saying you were bringing in fucking devastation to this place every day. Why did you invite an earthquake in here every single day like that?

Speaker 1:          01:05:57       She roommates. Do she do any, anything? Douchey in your life? You gotta you gotTa. Figure out a way to separate yourself from that. Like that's like number one, like any shit you have to deal with. Like if you have a fuckup job and it's a bad situation, you gotta get the fuck man. Just go. Yeah. You can't just swallow that. There's a reason why so many guys go postal. You know, you hear that expression postal. I mean, there's a reason why that expression exists is because that job sucks. Yep. Job's boring as fuck. And you work with a bunch of assholes and one day you go, I'm going to get a fucking gun and I'm going to kill every last one of you. Do douchebags because they have been the source of your pain and frustration. Every god Damn Dang. He show up at work. There's negative tiffany there. And not saying that the guy who shoots him isn't the fucking the cause of it. I mean a lot of times, but it's like to them like there's, you know, they're hard wired wrong. So whatever, whatever the reason they hate it, they get there and it's just shit everyday. It's shit. And with other, there's so many people out there that just hate everyone they have to deal with everyday and they haven't bosses that fuck with them and,

Speaker 2:          01:07:01       and the. And you realize to men like after, you know, when you get like a little bit older, you start to figure out that like you're in control of, of like your own happiness and a lot of ways

Speaker 1:          01:07:11       like if you are, but you're not. When you get all locked up with debt, the thing is you get a car and you get an apartment and you know, you know, you have bills you have to pay every fucking month. That's when things get tricky because then, especially in this economy, like what do you do? Do you fucking just cast yourself off freed? You quit this without having another job. What do you do?

Speaker 2:          01:07:30       I think, well there's like borderline, like you don't be a fucking, like A. I'm just gonna quit everything. But like if you're really fucking miserable either at your job or in a relationship or even like with like with like a friend or whatever it is, you can fucking make that better. Like you can get. You can leave somebody, you can look for another job. I know it's, I'm not saying.

Speaker 1:          01:07:52       And you get your own shit together. You can get your shit together, getting your own shit together. The only way you're ever gonna really have a fun life and a fun relationship. Now, if you deal with your own personal bullshit, like you can't have a good relationship. You got a lot of personal. Absolutely.

Speaker 2:          01:08:05       Absolutely. Absolutely. Yeah. There's no such thing as somebody with a WHO's, who's got a bunch of fucking to their own issues and has great relationships. You know, like it's just, you have to straighten your shit up, but I'm just saying you can make a decision

Speaker 1:          01:08:16       to not be miserable. How many times do you ever get that speech where people ask you like, hey, how do you. How'd you get started in comedy? If I wanted to do comedy, how would I get started? And they're like 35 or $36 a month. Do it. I don't even know what to tell you. You're going to have to live like a popper. You wonder, are you ready to get that hot tub time machine going back? You can't start. I mean, you can. Robert Schimmel, did you know she started when he was 36? Sure. Fucking crazy. I'm pretty sure. Yeah, I'm pretty sure he started fairly late and I. I believe you already had a family. He did, which is a that's. That makes it even harder. He's hilarious. It's very funny. I love be sick right now. He took again, have some sort of a liver transplant or something like that. Now. It's very sad. He's a great guy. Very, very, very funny guy too. Super Fun and Super Nice Guy Too.

Speaker 2:          01:09:09       Yeah, I love that he can he be like, when you watch them, like you're watching somebody who's it? It seems like it's like effortless, like there's, there's really like a controlled, like lower amount of energy where you're like, yeah, is it this guy? Looks like he's ordering a sandwich or something and it's hilarious and the room is just fucking floating.

Speaker 1:          01:09:29       Yeah, he's a really good writer and really good at his pace and setting and he's got his own very particular style. Super. Their unique style. He's fantastic and a lot of his stuff is very juvenile, which I respect what I'm saying. I mean he's, he's got a lot of like advanced Dick Jokes. They're like, but they're really good and well written shit, you know, he so fucking fun started late in life, man.

Speaker 2:          01:09:54       That, that the likelihood of somebody being 36 and being as good as Robert Schimmel is, got to be, I don't know, like in the, it's in the billions, right? Like that.

Speaker 1:          01:10:07       Most of it's supposed to happen usually once people started on their late thirties, they just, it's too late. I started when I was 21. I started just a few weeks after my 21st birthday. I turned 21 August 11th, 1988. And uh, August 27th was the first time I ever went on stage. Wow, man, what about you?

Speaker 2:          01:10:29       I went, I started, uh, when I was 20. I just turned 23.

Speaker 1:          01:10:34       Yeah, right. That's a good time, right, because you're, you're not, you're not locked into any sort of success. Not like you're moving up the corporate ladder and you're doing pretty good and you know you don't wanna you don't want to fucking sidetrack that and try to do stand up and then have the standup not work out and then you go, well, I could have been a success here.

Speaker 2:          01:10:52       Yeah. Now I know a couple of guys that did that. I know a couple of guys that because that's hard to give up your lifestyle if you got like you're making good money in a regular job.

Speaker 1:          01:11:00       It's one of the hardest things that, that leap that untethering from the system try to make it into show business, quote unquote. Especially something as volatile as standup comedy. Especially in the beginning when you really don't know what the fuck you're doing. Oh yeah. I was lucky I was 21 and I'd, you know, I had a bunch of shit going on martial arts wise. I was teaching and stuff, but I didn't really have any money, you know? I mean I had a little. I had a car that I was making payments on it. Once I started doing comedy, I didn't have any money and I got my car, got repossessed. I had to get a car. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I went broke, but there was no, no other way around it. You know, when I think about how many times I've approached, like basically devastation is near financial devastation.

Speaker 1:          01:11:45       When you can see it without close the bank account and you go and here's the calendar, how am I going to make money happen? But then like, it's weird. It's like, it's like the universe provides, right? Like right when you're like, well, I don't know what's going to happen. Something will happen. As long as you keep working on it, as long as you don't sit around and wait for it to provide. As long as you keep hustling and keep grinding, you know? Yeah. The universe will provide no, and ladies and gentlemen guarantee you, you will laugh if you do not laugh at this. You are a Douche bag. It's thrilled. COMSA girl, you can get it on itunes. Can you get it on Amazon? Get on Amazon, Amazon.com. You can get it. I want to. Tommy's shows where you at next? I met Denver this week at comedy works downtown.

Speaker 1:          01:12:27       Oh, that's the best one. That's common warts. Downtown's the shit. I love that fucking place. Thursday through Sunday and if you're lucky it stopped snowing there. That's true. It snowed in Montreal. Saturday. Didn't really. When we were leaving, it was snowing. She seventh, May 7th, May 7th or whatever the fuck it was. 30 something degrees out and snow and all morning and I hope it's not that fucking cold. I'm not ready for that. No, I'm not going to be that bad. It's already May. It's gonna. Probably be like sixties. It'd be nice to the Colorado's beautiful in the spring. Spring, summer. It's fucking awesome. It's got to be great. Well, you went up to my house up there. You know that shit was fucking sick. That was ridiculous. Too bad a mountain lion ate my God damn dog did it. Really? And Yeah, too bad. My check doesn't have to drive in the fucking snow.

Speaker 1:          01:13:12       That's part of the problem. She hit. She hit a wall, a tree, and she hit the side of a mountain cheese as two separate accidents, snowy roads drive in the snow at all. She grew up in Texas and like after the second time it was like, I go on the road too much. I'm like, I can't leave you here. You don't have to fucking drive in the snow. So ridiculous. When the mountains, she doesn't drive. I grew up in Boston. Dude. I not only did I grow up in Boston, I had a newspaper route for five years. That means that for five fucking years it didn't matter how much snow was out. I was driving. I drove every God damn day throwing the pot. I know how to hit that slide. Counter that to stay calm and pump the brakes. I don't panic when my car starts sliding, you know, cause yeah. I had to throw papers out the window and you know, I, I got an a ton of accidents too. Just growing up. Shit, I must've been in 10 accidents by the time I was like 21 really from snow and ice and snow and ice. Just being retarded, isn't it amazing here in la or California even

Speaker 6:          01:14:12       I guess how people react to rain, they fucking panic, like really lose their minds. No idea how to drive, no idea that well, not only that, it gets slippery as fuck when the rain first starts and people don't realize this, especially if you have shitty tires and shitty breaks is because the oil in the ground is a from driving and people's, uh, engines leaking. It never gets rinsed off. Like it doesn't enormous city. It just builds up because it doesn't, it doesn't rain here for like fucking months and months and months and months of millions and millions of cars every day going over the same spot. Drip, drip, drip, drip oil gets everywhere and as soon as it rains, the first couple of hours is dangerous as fuck because that shit is just like ice. It's terrible. Panic. People really truly panic. There's so many fucking people here. That was the number one reason why I wanted to get out of call or get out of California, moved to Colorado.

Speaker 6:          01:15:00       And the reason why I moved to such a remote place in the mountains, because I think that it's not healthy to be around this many people. You know, I've seen these studies that they did with rat population density studies where they increase the amount of rats in an area and they get fucking crazy and start biting each other. Like the reason why people don't like each other as much as like what we talked about before. We're supposed to be in groups, small groups where you know, everybody, you know, and, and we're only wired for like 150. You get a place like la where you're dealing with $20 million people plus Mexicans. Nobody knows how many people there really are. You know, like they sent me the census and I'm like, get the fuck out of here with this says this is a joke. You don't how any Mexicans I know that are illegal.

Speaker 6:          01:15:40       I know a ton of them. I know a bunch of dudes. I know dudes that I work out with. I know I, I know dudes at certain stores that I go to, dudes that you know, run businesses, they run their own businesses, they're all Mexicans and they know a bunch of cooks. Guys at work at this Mexican restaurant that I go to. That's fucking awesome. They're all the illegals and they're never going to answer that census. We're never gonna have the right number on it. Just shut up. You don't know. You don't know. You know, there's no way to tell. There's no way to tell this. Well the only one that's going to tell, but by the time they can tell we're going to be so far fucked with our loss of privacy. I mean, which is coming. I mean that's, that's going to be the next stage is going to be some sort of a drastic decrease in the amount of privacy that we have.

Speaker 6:          01:16:21       The point where either it's going to be. Because technology brings this on because it's just the technology that is created is so immense and powerful that you really do have like an instant access to where everyone is sort of like google for your life. You know, like we have with Google now, you have an instant access to any sort of question you have on anything. You can immediately find out at least an idea of what the argument is, pro and con and then start researching into it instantly will eventually we're going to have something along those lines where you're going to be able to know how many people are here, who the people are, what you know, like you're going to be able to google not even google, but like someone who's not even on Google, you know, my next door neighbor, the carpenter or whatever the fuck he is, you know, I don't know anything about that gun and there's nothing about him in the news. He's not a bad guy. He's not a criminal or anything like that. You're going to be able to know everything about him. Sure. You gotta be able to know his birth date. You're going to be able to know what his childhood was like. You might be able to, you know, who knows

Speaker 2:          01:17:22       and you're going to know that people will know everything about you. Yeah. It was just the really vulnerable feeling like you're going to be. You realize that like even now things you do get tracked, you know, like your credit card purchases, you're surfing can be humble when you were, you ever use like yahoo email or something like that and you, uh, you like, you, you have like certain keywords and your email and it'll show you like ads on the right hand side you have to do with like the email that somebody sent you. What the fuck and how much more is that going to see? How much better or more invasive is that going to be? It's going to be much more. Yeah. You know what I mean?

Speaker 6:          01:17:58       About last week we talked about a smart dust. It's a new technology that they've created these little tiny things that are literally the size of a grain of sand and they will have the ability to transmit and receive data and they will have their own power supply. Yeah. And HP is working on a whole project right now. Just Google if you want to. We were not going to talk about it again, but if you're interested in the idea and what it's all about, just google smart dust. It's fascinating in hps involved in it and this is where they're going to put trillions of sensors all over the world, trillions of these things. So literally they'll be able to tell you like, where cars are parked, you know, that this house is on fire, there'll be a grid. Well, people will have access to information far beyond the reach that we have now. I already fit, feel like it's

Speaker 2:          01:18:42       pretty, uh, like um, I don't know. It's like upsetting that. I mean, I think it's necessary in a way, but it's kind of like, it makes me uncomfortable that so many places have cameras, you know?

Speaker 6:          01:18:53       Yeah. But look at how that helped, you know, that's what I'm saying. I know that it's an, it's a necessary thing, but it's like, sorry to walk away from the microphone and get my notepad, but look at how that worked in New York with that guy that tried to blow up that car and comscore and. Absolutely. Absolutely. But at the same time, you go, man, like our cameras watching me everywhere I go, right. Well that's like. And then there's the tin foil and put that shit on. You say, well, hey man, that guy's dead car didn't even blow up match. What they did was, that's all black ops do. That's all fucking cow cointelpro. What they do is, you know Alex Jones style. Well they do, but the guy that is in that van is working for the federal government. Ladies and gentlemen, we have the papers, we have the documents, he works for the government.

Speaker 6:          01:19:32       He sets up a faulty bomb. It doesn't work. It's not scientific. It, it lights on fire. They arrest him, they get him, they tell you they got him because of covert video cameras and they need to protect you to protect us. They're going to put video cameras everywhere, ladies and gentlemen. It's a scam. It's a lot. It's, it's the new world order. Did he really say all that about this made up? That was what he was saying. Yeah, that was really good. So I could see his one of you to. Yeah, that he would say, oh, it's bullshit, and you think that's nonsense. You think that's. But that's how the government thinks. I'm not saying that they did that with this. I'm saying they would do that though. I think with this guy, it's pretty documented. This guys will retard and you know, he was all upset at the world and went to Pakistan and met with the Taliban the whole deal. This guys legitimately retarded and he's not some sort of a plant, but it's very possible. There's a lot of people that believe that Oklahoma City, that the reason why Oklahoma City was blown up or was allowed to be blown up was so that they could pass new, stricter anti terrorism laws.

Speaker 2:          01:20:38       Yeah. But here's, here's my only problem with like point of views like that. Right. And I mean like with all of them, when it's like a really something that big is the magnitude of the conspiracy, if it were to be true. Yeah. Is, it's too big. You would have to have too many people keeping secrets. People are naturally reluctant to keep secrets for the most part. When you have people have like a compulsion to want to share, especially when it's something that they're not supposed to share. That is true. So it's like if we're talking about something that big, you have to have literally there would have to be hundreds of people. Almost homeless setting. Yeah. Oklahoma City. Well you know, but

Speaker 6:          01:21:20       just to play devil's advocate, do you know that the FBI removed several and detonated bombs outside of the building. They pulled them out of the building after it happened and this is. This was reported on the news and Oklahoma and that the bomb itself that they made at a fertilizer, that they're literally like, if you look at the, the evidence, like how the building was blown up. There's no way a fertilizer bomb did that kind of damage. Not only that, the building blew outward, it didn't blow from the center down. There wasn't like a big crater underneath the truck. And the idea is that there were bombs inside the building and at this guy who blew up this bomb, you know, there's this truck bomb. Yeah, he blew up a truck bomb, but that's not responsible for all that damage. The idea is that the damage was done by a bunch of bombs that were inside the building and all of them didn't go off and that's the reason why the FBI pulled them out of the building, pulled a, an unexploded ones out of the building and that could get.

Speaker 6:          01:22:12       That doesn't necessarily mean the government was involved with it. Could have been, was that the, the, you know, that he was working with other people and not only did he have this fertilizer bomb, but he had these other bombs in the building and maybe his fertilizer bomb is supposed to detonate those other bombs and blow up the whole thing. There's a bunch of different possibilities of it, but it's very rarely talked about and the, the footage of, you know, of all these different people that were involved at these different fucking Muslim guys that were supposed to be there that had, you know, worked for a Saddam Hussein and Iraq and all these different, you know, various organizations. You know, it's all, it's, it's a tricky little story. You know, when you start looking into it, you say, well, that still doesn't mean that there's some sort of conspiracy.

Speaker 6:          01:22:48       Absolutely it doesn't, but they've done shit in the past. And when you look at the stuff that the government has done that would require hundreds of people to keep their mouth shut. Like, do you know about the Gulf of Tonkin? Do you know about that? Is that the, uh, the Viet a fake? That moon has been proven now and this is something that they did to get us into the Vietnam War. So they did that and they got away with it. I mean, we went through with the Vietnam war operation. Northwoods is another one that we've talked about this on the podcast before, but for those people who haven't heard this google operation, northwoods would operation northwoods is, was a plan that was drafted by the Joint Chiefs of staff in 1962 and vetoed by Kennedy. It was signed by the Joint Chiefs of Staff. And the plan was to attack American civilians and blame it on the Cubans.

Speaker 6:          01:23:34       So we would go to war with Cuba. That's they were going to blow up a jet that was part of the idea. They're going to blow up a jet and pull the people out of the jet and fly the jet and move the people to another plane. But then they were going to blow the jet up and you know, say all these people died. Really? Yeah. This was in 1962. This is a plot by the joint chiefs of staff did. Not only did they say that they were going to bomb Guantanamo Bay, they were the lob mortars on Guantanamo Bay and assume civilian or military casualties. So they were going to kill American military to blame it on the Cubans so that people would get all fired up. So it's not like they haven't done shit like that before. Yeah, no. Um, you started talking to them about conspiracies. The real problem is when you get into him and you start researching them, you go, fuck, look at all the shit they have done.

Speaker 2:          01:24:17       Yeah, no, you're right. And, and, and I, and I don't say like that. Uh, I don't believe that the government or anybody for that matter. It doesn't have the capacity to be that morally corrupt or evil. My, my just, my natural inclination is to be like when, when these things start to get, like really massive is to go, like how can we, how in this day and age especially can that secret be kept?

Speaker 6:          01:24:43       Right. That's true. The one one way that it's kept. If you fall, put your tinfoil hat on tight. One way it's kept is by putting out information that's correct and mixing it with a bunch of stuff that's ridiculous. You know, and that's, that's how they processed this information. What they do is they attach all these legitimate ideas to something that's so outrageous that it makes the legitimate idea seem ridiculous because they're connected to them. But by relationship, you know, and that's, that's a strategy that is well documented. You know, it's, you know, if you look at the, in the 19 fifties, the CIA wrote papers about this kind of stuff, you know, cointelpro and the idea that, you know, you have to, you know, put out dumb stories that attach themselves to the real store. So it makes it ridiculous. I mean, people have, have actually had jobs where they're disinflation agents and their prior to go on blogs and websites, this is going on right now.

Speaker 6:          01:25:41       This is real shit. Or they're hired to argue certain points they're hired to, you know, stand up for government ideas and offer, you know, very well thought out. Uh, you know, uh, arguments and they do it under these anonymous assumed names and sometimes it's several people. These are real government jobs that actually exist and it's been proven. It's been talked about. We find the shit that the government has done and it makes you go, fuck, what have they done that I don't know about, you know, you gotta be pretty elaborate and be crazy. Yeah, let's see. So that's where the argument of 100 people would have to be in, on the secret. That's where it doesn't work. The reason why it doesn't work, it's because they have been, you know, there's been a lot of secrets that you know, were processed that we didn't find out about the operation.

Speaker 6:          01:26:23       Midnight. Climax is another one. We've talked on this show about before and it's a the 19 fifties, the government ran the CIA ran brothels in New York and in San Francisco and they dosed people with Lsd. They had John's would come in and they would try to get lay these poor folks and they would, they would blast them with acid whether in there trying to get their free content is so crazy. That's so far. They did it because they wanted to test the effects of LSD and they couldn't find willing patients anymore or you know, a few people did it and you know, they fucking dose people, man. They like a little bit. They're giving you like mad doses to see what happened

Speaker 4:          01:26:57       when they did the original, the what's the famous one where they were going to see if it could be like a truth serum where the CIA had. They killed people. They accidentally killed one of their own agents.

Speaker 4:          01:27:08       Yeah. They gave him too much and he fucking like they because they didn't know what kind of dosages. There's just have another little tablet and he fucking. He lost it. He, he died. Well, it makes sense that they would, that that would be possible because if you think about like, uh, experiments, you know, they didn't know I, it's not like we had like a whole database on an lsd experience, you know, we could pull from like, hey, don't do more than this amount or you'll fucking blow your, your own chemistry is also different from the next person. Yeah, like alcoholics. Some dudes can't drink at all. Other dudes can, you just drank and somehow or another they don't even get drunk. It's weird. Like an old, like some guys just pound it to all day and some dudes do that with an asset. There's some dudes that gobble that shit up and take like fucking five, six tabs and they're fine and they seem to like be better than other dudes. They get a high dose and they'll never, they're never the same again. I know a guy like that. I know a guy like that. Who Was it? What's his name? Uh, I can't say what happened, what happened to him. He took, he took a, he took a dose. This is like,

Speaker 2:          01:28:07       you know, uh, like 15, no, 13 years,

Speaker 4:          01:28:12       years ago about. Whoa. And that was it. Huh? That was it, dude. What happened? He, um, you know, he was chilling. He was in college and just partying is like doing regular, you know, drinking. And what was the effect? Uh, he, he, I think he took it like, let's say like on a Friday. Yeah.

Speaker 2:          01:28:28       And

Speaker 4:          01:28:29       everything, it seemingly wore off like the way any like, you know, when you drink, do drugs with wood

Speaker 2:          01:28:36       and then he was a, he went like the next week, went into like the, like the school and walked through the cafeteria and went into the kitchen and started like, like asking the, asking the chef to like if he could swim in the water supply,

Speaker 4:          01:28:54       like from the sink, like he was like, can I go into the pipes? And they were just like, Huh,

Speaker 2:          01:29:02       what are you doing back here? Right. Then I go into the pipes and swim to the water. And they were like, so then it was like, we need to check this kid out and then they should've let them try. Maybe could. To this day though, he's, you know, he's this, he's like, he's, he's off, like he's, he's able to work and do things, but he's not the same guy that he was. Something happened, some shit was disconnected. What was he like before and what does he like? No, um, before he was like, uh, like I would say thoughtful, you know, pretty articulate, reserved and now he's like quirky and a little more like, like he's like artsy, like a kind of an artsy guy. Um, but like peculiar, like, like when says things that like don't make sense, you know? And he's like a percentage insane.

Speaker 2:          01:29:53       Like what? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I would say now and, and, and more inclined, like you, you're like, I could see something else happening where you would go, you know what I mean? Like you're watching something went wrong. You're on the edge right now. Like you're about, you know, you could see, I could see you falling in the tech. Pretty pretty simple, crazy thing. The crazy thing is before that, there was no evidence of that at all. Zero, zero. It was totally normal as far as I knew and I knew him like I wasn't good, good friends, but I knew him fairly well.

Speaker 6:          01:30:21       The radical change, radical change. I believe it. Dude, I believe it just because of A. I hadn't experienced one of the last times I did dmt the last time I did dmt where it was a a few years ago, where for like two weeks after I did it this way I was describing it was very difficult to describe, but I say that reality got very slippery. It's like reality just didn't seem. Didn't seem like A. I could bang on it really anymore. Yeah. It seemed like it seemed like the dmt experience is so powerful and so incredibly beautiful and overwhelming and shocking that when you're doing it, it seems more real than reality itself. It seems like you're taking a look into a better, more pure, efficient next stage reality. It's like you feel like you're taking this look into what's next. You know, it's like an afterlife type of experience, but that's really what it feels like and then I would, I would come back or I did come back for him from it and then for a couple of weeks this, this life just didn't seem like it was going to hold up.

Speaker 6:          01:31:31       And so it felt like all this shit that I'm seeing everything around me. It's like I'm assuming that this is real. I'm assuming that this is hard and this is reality and this is life. But after doing the dmt experience, like that seems so much more real than reality. So what the fuck is this? You know? And then I started. Yeah, yeah. I, I started getting these weird ideas about like the structure of, of, of life and you know, the pattern of, of, of human existence and of everything that's going on on the planet the same time that it was really like much less tangible, much less real than I thought it was. And that perhaps the sleeping time when your brain is producing dmt, you know, like when you're in heavy rem sleep, that might be just a, a much more intense version of life that we only get, like in small doses.

Speaker 6:          01:32:16       And that might be real life. And this might be the crazy dream. Sounds Banana. Oop, I almost said it sounds fucking crazy. And um, and, and rightly so, but what are the alternatives? I mean, the alternative is any, anytime you start talking about what, what life could be or what drugs could be or what hallucinations really mean, you open yourself up to ridicule. Rightly so, because most of the time when you talk about the subjects, that sounds ridiculous, but what is the alternative? Well, the alternative is that we're just this biological, fleshy thing that lives for 65 years. Then you fucking die and you move on and you breed while you're here. And eventually there'll be too many of us will blow the world up because there's too many of us. That's the alternative, you know, and that this, there's nothing means anything. And you know, there is no purpose for any of this, unlike everything else in nature.

Speaker 6:          01:32:59       I mean everything else in nature is building something, supplying to something, you know, a part of an ecosystem has a very vital, vital part in the whole process, the natural process of life. Everything that we see from volcanoes and fires and predators and prey all seems to fit into this entire system that except for human beings, you know, except for how we view our life. But I think we're just a really advanced form of all that shit and that what, what we're, we're doing here and in this life is setting us up somehow or another for this next stage of existence. That's why every single culture is had this idea of heaven. Every single culture has had this idea of a better place that you're going to go to somewhere where it's going to be more pure or you know, there it'd be all love or be. There's all these different various versions of it. I think it's because there's a part of us instinctively that understands that this is a stage and that like everything else in the universe from the big bang to the formation of stars to the formation of planets to life forming on planets to life evolving and getting more advanced that are all keeps moving on towards some new, better, more improved, you know, more advanced thing and that that's what's going to happen to us too.

Speaker 2:          01:34:12       Wait, but does your, did your, did that last dmt experience though? Like that was last time you did it? That was last time I did it. Did it, does your experience afterwards also kind of make you go, well maybe I should do

Speaker 6:          01:34:24       or, or. No, no, I think, you know, the thing, the reason why I haven't done it since then, it's because I still, I still think I'm still trying to exactly process, like honestly process what happened. Like I could do it now again, I might be willing to do it now again if I had some, but I think it's just as important to try to honestly process what happened in the last experience, to try to learn as much from it as you can. You know, the, the one of the things you do experience when you have any like really extreme psychedelic experience, you, you this complete dissolving

Speaker 1:          01:34:58       of your ego. Everything like you've built yourself up to be everything. You're your language, the way you talk, you know your social structure, how you fit in with your friends and your family and your dog and all that stuff. Yourself. Definition all dissolves. Everything dissolved and your definition of the world of earth, of human beings. All that dissolves too and you start to look at things in this almost like this alien perspective. It's like I always say that like when you're taking mushrooms, it feels like, and even damn it feels like you're looking at the universe through the eyes of an alien of like a super advanced organic light form. That's far, far, far evolved from where we are at this point in time and you get to see the whole thing objectively and clearly without the context of any of the things you already understand and know about it like language and accents and you know, jobs and all that bullshit you start, you see it all like in some weird sort of way, but when you do that, the problem is a fucking.

Speaker 1:          01:35:54       Especially if you have a crazy dose, you know, a crazy dmt sort of trip, but the real problem is reassembling back into the regular world, the real problem as the like being around like regular people in mundane shit and try to take it all seriously and trying to focus on all the stuff that you do. You know, you know, you do have to do as I always say, psychedelic experiences are useless if you can't bring something back. If you don't learn something that you can apply to this world because this is the world where you're spending most of your time, you know? Yeah, that's true. Yeah, and you're, your. Most of your time is spent in the waking world. You know, so if you're having these psychedelic trips and that's what you really enjoy it a, it's like it's all, you're all enjoying, you know, these experiences and you're not, you're not enjoying the regular world at all, you know, then you're not bringing anything back with you.

Speaker 1:          01:36:44       You can, you can go and have these experiences and bring something back with you and change the world around you and make it better like that is possible. Or You could take too much and go fucking bonkers and try, try and swim in the pipe, the pipes to get to the water supply. I've never fucked with acid. You know, I don't, I don't think that I'm not into doing anything that people create. You know, I did a MDM a once. I did ecstasy once and I got really fucked up and then the next day and my brain was just useless and I think I learned from that experience. I enjoyed the experience of being on ecstasy, but the come down was just way too brutal. I was like, this is not good for you. I think shit like chemicals that the manmade stuff that doesn't exist in nature, that lsd sort of does in Hawaiian baby would drove seeds and some. Some other things. You can actually track the GHB. Know her. That's fucking. I heard that shit is a really dangerous. I iod, I was in a coma. Really? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. What happened? I took calculus so it's so dumb. When I did, I took, I took ecstasy and then I was having some drinks, like I probably had like four or five drinks, which is, you know, like

Speaker 2:          01:37:56       liquor and then I was like, I don't feel this ecstasy at all. This guy comes to you by the way. I'm a freshman in college, so 18, 19. So then he's like, I got, he's got a gallon of Ghb in the back now you're supposed to take a, like if you take, you take like a water cap. That's what we did. We would take it like this. You'd pour it into that and just that's it. And then that's it. Well, he has a milk jug so he gives it to me and I'm like, he was like, here, just take a swig. Well when I look back on it, I realized what I did to. It was just like out of like not wanting to be rude basically like politeness almost killed me is that I opened it and I can't, you couldn't. It's too heavy to like, you know, a milk jug just as like a thin little cap.

Speaker 2:          01:38:42       Right. You can't fill it. So you're trying to like, well how much. So I realized I went like this and I realized there's too much of my mouth. There's, there's six capitals in my mouth. Oh No. So I'm not going to spit it and what he's going to sell if I spit it out, it's like I'm spitting $50 on the ground, just swallow it. Oh my God. And I give it back to them. What kind of an asshole has a fucking milk jug of ghb around his house in. And then I fucking continued drinking. And that's one thing about Ghb is you're not supposed to have any alcohol with it. Like not even a drink. So you black out, you go into a coma? Yeah. Who say what do you remember? I fucking, I remember all the way up until like moments before blacking out, like I was hanging out.

Speaker 2:          01:39:27       I was, I realized that I was like fucking highest shit. Like, like Perma Grin, like, and just like wow, like we should hang out man, like buying drinks, like just being a fucking asshole. And then I remember I sat down and uh, and then I felt like that and my sister was at this bar, we're all at a bar and my sister was like, he, like everyone was like, just let him sleep it off and she's the one that fucking cold. The, uh, the ambulance, like they had to, you know, and then I woke up with tubes and all kinds of shit. Yeah, it sucked. It was really suck. Don't overdose on Ghb. It's not fun. Be Rude. Be Roots spending. Put It on the ground, man. Yeah. I've never fucked with that stuff. I've never fought with cocaine. Heroin. Here's the thing too about Ghb is that, and it's real natural form.

Speaker 2:          01:40:17       Like when, what it really is, it's like, you know, it can be regulated, it's used as an anesthetic in, in, in parts of Europe, but when you buy it from like street level people, it's obviously, it's fucked with like people will spike it with anything. Even if they didn't spike it, you drank so much of it. Oh yeah, yeah, I would have been fine, but still he used to sell that shit at Gnc for bodybuilder bodybuilder cover. And that was kind of the thing. Like when you, when, when we started like I used to sample it and stuff you would use, it was under the guise of like, well I'm lifting weights

Speaker 1:          01:40:55       guy, get fucking you fucked up. I'm lifting weight, lifting weights. Oh, that's hilarious. Um, I wanted to talk about a couple of things that I saw on the news today just because there's some ridiculous shit. Um, speaking of, uh, of lifting weights and the University of North Carolina, they, they're doing a study. Somebody put this on the Rogan Board, my message board batch put it up there. They're doing this study on shooting a ultrasound into people's balls.

Speaker 3:          01:41:24       What

Speaker 1:          01:41:25       to act as a, um, a birth control, uh, have a reversible birth control for men. They are to shoot a burst of ultrasound into your ball sack and blast on your sperm knees so that you're, you're just shooting blanks for like six months. Why would, wait? What is the point of this? He didn't want to make babies, but that sounds horrifying. Then it sounds ridiculous that you would trust them. Like you're gonna you're gonna, kill my loads, but they'll come back in six months and then what happens after those six months? I make fucking radioactive babies. What kind of Shit is that? What one of those babies going to look like? Could you imagine if I get five and a half months when your shit supposed to be like, not come back yet, but you shoot around it, some chick and you make some fucking nuclear baby.

Speaker 1:          01:42:11       It's going to be like the six aren't babies. Oh my, that's going to be Shiva. Literally will come out on fucking fire with a crazy headdress and shit. And then doctors will be like, oh, you didn't know that. I mean, come on. Think about all the autistic kids that are being created today and all the thoughts of like where this is coming from, whether it's environmental or chemicals or just all sorts of theories, vaccinations, people being older and having the kids because they're older and their. Their DNA is damaged. How about the babies that were going to have when they are shooting ultrasound into your fun sand? You have like radio waves? Yeah. No you shouldn't. I would still just pull out before four allowed. Well, you know, that's how my first daughter was born.

Speaker 1:          01:42:54       The pull out method pull out. Yeah, I did a bit about it on my last special. Totally true. Pulling out. Don't worry, man. Prayaj acculate is like. There's little swimmers. I do remember that. Boys in there, they'll fucking. They'll get the job done. The Green Moray loads at the greenbrier. That's real. You can make. You can make a baby for sure without coming inside and check. It's actually kind of makes you go, mmm. I can't believe it didn't happen so many times. Definitely. Well, don't think it's that common. I think it's probably pretty hard to do, but it's still possible to do. It really is. Yeah. Green Berets. They really like. And how many times she like squeezing that. Were you hoping nuns coming out a little. A few guys went up, popped out. That's like a tiny town. Oh yeah, like a little like a flax when he goes like, I don't really just a little bit snug.

Speaker 1:          01:43:42       Feel a little. Just a twitch and you're trying to hold it in there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well they're trying to come up with all sorts of different ways and you know with women it's all they can either shoot you up with something that makes your body think it's pregnant or they give you a pill that makes your body think it's pregnant or they put a catcher's Mitt in there, like put an Iud that shit in your snatch and it gets all infected and your loads are trying to show that. It makes me barnacles on a fucking dark. Yeah. The thought of that one that makes me uncomfortable. If they pull it out and there's all these stalagmites from your old loads that have been trying to get into this iud and they just hang out there, it's all crusty with your old loads and maybe your old loads die inside our box and that's why it starts to stink.

Speaker 1:          01:44:25       You imagine like you didn't want to get her pregnant, like maybe you should take that out, honey, I don't want to get pregnant as well. You don't know how to get extra douche up there to to kill your loads and score them out because your body's not absorbing them. So she's just walking around matching. I'm reading it now. There's an. Oh, speaking of like gross. Have you heard about that movie? Which one? The one that's supposed to be like. It's like a a guy. It's like the Senate, the human centipede. I think it's called. I've heard about it online, but I didn't look at it. I haven't seen. Obviously everybody's been talking about the human centipede and I got a bunch of twitter things like, oh, check this out. Human Centipede. But I. It looked so ridiculous. I didn't even want to try it. Really, really want to look at it.

Speaker 1:          01:45:05       Did you see what just happened there? Yeah. How far away is this image from our voice? Like look how long it takes. Yeah. It's like this is like a ten second delay. I think we're gonna have to try something else other than ustream. I'm going to have to try some other service people say live stream is really good or that's not really live right there. This is what we're projecting. This is what we're saying. Like, look how long it takes. Watch three. Bam. Let's get a count on this. Alright. Okay. Ready? I'm going to point to the camera and then I'm gonna Count One, two, three, four. About five seconds is about a five or six second. Delay it. Say they said it's fine for them. Maybe it's just whack ass gay connection. Human or we love this and see what happens. See if it works better.

Speaker 1:          01:45:54       I don't want to see the human centipede man. I hear and I'm sure it's fucked up. I'm sure. I'm sure it's good and now we're like on like a couple seconds. Wait, why? Why, why the why don't you want everything, man, I've seen too much. I'm distracting myself. I've seen it too much. Somebody sent me some videos, some Russian skinheads cutting. This dude's head off. Oh No, I don't. I don't like this shit, man. I started watching him for the first couple of seconds when I stopped it. I said, I do not need to see another dude getting his fucking head cut. It doesn't need to be in your fucking reserves. It's a waste. I know it's out there. I've already. I've already applied that data to my view of the world. I don't have to see more and more evidence of it. I know that there are some extreme examples of fucked up shit out there, especially going online and just go online changes your whole fucking view of the world. Yeah. People who don't go online to imagine how dumb are parents were much less. They knew about the big picture about what's possible.

Speaker 1:          01:46:52       What's why. If you. If you try to tell them like a lot of times it doesn't even have to be something too outrageous. Obama would. A Bama said he was talking about fucking ipods and x boxes and IPADS and Xbox, none of which I know how to use. I hate all that. First of all, I hate all that, none of which I know how to use what he was saying, that these things provide information, there's too much information and it's difficult to discern what's factual and what's not and that crazy ideas can gain traction and become problematic and he were saying that it's actually makes it hard on democracy, which I thought was hilarious. Makes it hard to run the country and it's bad for the country somehow or another, and that line just appeals to like a certain generation when they, when none of which I know how to use.

Speaker 1:          01:47:39       This is what he says. He says, you know, Ipos and xboxes and playstations, none of which I know how to use. My fucking two year old daughter knows how to use an ipod. Dude, she knows how to find the song. She likes to click on it. She knows how to go to the little apps and pick a little monkey game and play the monkey game. Do you know how to use a fucking ipod? You know, don't be stupid. That's dumb. And don't brag about about being stupid. Goddamn Harvard graduate and you're the president of the fucking United States of America. Don't give us all that our shucks bullshit. No, there's going to be a bunch of retards that always don't like you or think you're an elitist. Alright, you gotta. Accept that and just be yourself. All right? Don't fucking pretend you don't know how to work an Ipod, man.

Speaker 1:          01:48:20       Just stop. I know. It's stupid. That's gross. I agree. It's fucking dumb, man. You know, like the whole, it's like he's putting on an act. It's like he's like a comic that we were talking about earlier. We're talking about comics that are disingenuous. That's what he's doing. It's a phone. Anything. Yeah. So anyway, he's, he's trying to say that um, that somehow or another, all this access to information that people have. Now the, the problem is that these crazy ideas can gain traction and then it become a, becomes more of a distraction than it is a useless a source of information. But that's ridiculous. So who's the use, who's the useful source of information? How come there's so much shit that's in the news that we don't hear about? How about how can we have to go online to find out what's happened in Liberia to get real information about the fucking oil spill in the Gulf?

Speaker 1:          01:49:07       You know, you're not getting that shit from the network news. You're not getting that shit from the newspapers. You've got to really see the images and the videos online. There's a video online right now. This guy flew a plane over the Gulf oil spill and videotaped the whole thing and put it up and showed how massive it is and how they're being. They're not being honest about what a catastrophe it is. It's fucking shocking. It's on my twitter. Even go to my twitter feed, go to Joe Rogan on twitter and just just my name. It's not.net anymore, it's just my name. I got that back. So if you go to my twitter feed, it's like one or two twitters ago. I put it, watch that video and freak the fuck out because it's. It's horrifying looking at this gigantic fucking thing of oil in the middle of the ocean.

Speaker 1:          01:49:47       You're not hearing about that from the news. They, they're, they're recognizing that it's a big deal, but they're not showing you 10 minutes of footage so you can really get a good idea of it. You got to look online. Yeah, you got. I mean to to find out like shit, like operation northwoods or any of these other things I'm talking about. This is, this isn't getting disgusted in the newspaper. This doesn't get discussed in the news. People are hiding this kind of information. Big gigantic corporations controlled network news. They controlled the newspapers, they control g controls. NBC and Fox News is owned by Rupert Murdoch and you know, and they seize Disney and yeah, I mean these are giant fucking corporations. They don't give you all the news. You need the idea that these bloggers and these people that are like, they're, they're not less less informative.

Speaker 1:          01:50:32       They're not like, like less reliable. There are people that easily. Could it be working for NBC or CBS or ABC to their fucking journalists. They're just a new version of journalists that does shit online and yeah, there's some people that are irreparable, but then the reputation is that they suck. You know, when, when someone, uh, online, you know, when it's been proven by a bunch of different websites and this guy puts out bad information or then they become discredited. I mean it's like a natural process for Obama and saying that that's not the case and that there's something bad about all this new access to information that just shows me two things. One, he's full of Shit and two, they're dealing with a lot of pressure there. They're getting jacked left and right about all sorts of things. There's these like a video out right now, have him on the campaign trail talking about no bid contracts for like Halliburton and shit like that.

Speaker 1:          01:51:18       He just fucking gave Halliburton some giant $500, million dollar, no bid contracts. His whole fucking platform was that he was going to end no bid contracts. Yep. And it just doesn't, does it? I mean, he's a, he's no more lobbyists. We only hires a bunch of them. I mean, the, the whole idea behind being a president is that you're supposed to be some sort of a leader and what you promise us is supposed supposed to be something that you're gonna, you're gonna when you get an office, you're going to change shit. You're going to make it better, but no one does. Nobody does. It's the craziest hustle ever, but the. The thing that I think nobody ever admits is that neither side ever does ever like ever, right? The Republicans good get criticized by the Democrats when they do certain things, but once the Democrats get in office like the, there's not nearly as many people criticizing Obama for sending 30,000 troops over to Afghanistan after winning the Nobel prize.

Speaker 1:          01:52:12       Not nearly as many as were criticizing George Bush. Of course not nailing, you know, they're all just spokesperson because both sides are completely full of shit. Do you think that they're full of shit or do you think they say whatever the fuck they have to say to get the job and then once they get the job they realize that they don't have a. They don't have a say. They don't, they're not the ones who get to dictate policy. Well, it's that and it's also that the game itself of, of politics is so already dictated for you. Like you, we have this idea that like we can elect somebody like, especially like Obama, like it's going to change

Speaker 2:          01:52:46       things. It's gonna, it's gonna actually the system will change, like he's going to be a certain way and no more like spinning stuff, but you realize that it's already laid out. There is, there's a spin thing in effect job, it's a job and so it's like being a like. It's really just like being a prospective professional spokesperson. It is and there's going to be distortions of truth and manipulations and lies no matter who gets it. It's, it's too big of a thing and there's just. There's too much. Too many people that you would have to try to please. It'd be impossible. So it's just, it's the way it is. People are going to lie and no matter who is in the office, it doesn't matter

Speaker 6:          01:53:24       who were the real problem is the corporate. If you ever seen like movies on corporations, especially the document, the documentary of the corporation where they talk about like a corporation as like associate sociopath or they don't worry at all about their. It's really interesting because they basically concentrate on what the, what sociopaths do is very similar to what corporations do. They don't worry about who their actions hurt. And that being in a corporation is sort of like, there's a diffusion of responsibility because there's so many other people that are doing the same thing. You know? And I wonder like when when you get a guy like Obama, I wonder if they start out with the right intentions and they start out really thinking that they're going to make a change, but once they get an office, you know, once they get in there maybe then it's like they realize like, you know, like you don't, you don't get to change shit, you know, you don't, you really, that's what they changed a few social things.

Speaker 6:          01:54:12       It changed like the gay marriage thing, like they're getting rid of don't ask, don't tell. Right? So you're, you're going to be able to say that you're gay, you know, and he's also like the medical marijuana thing, they said that they're not going to go after, they're only going to go after the dea will only go after medical marijuana dispensaries that violate both state and federal law. So the federal law is all marijuana is illegal, the state law is very clearly defined what you're allowed to do medically and a lot of people don't operate within those parameters and they sell a bunch of shit to people that don't have licenses. So the idea was they're going to go after those people, you know? Yeah. There's a few things that do change, right?

Speaker 2:          01:54:48       But uh, but it's, it's, that's what they hang their hat on.

Speaker 6:          01:54:50       What are those things that do change? Are they because they have to give something other than otherwise people will fucking just rage up, you know, do they like give you a little just to keep democracy in tact and just resist the change as much as possible resists giving the people what they want as much as possible. Is it consciously thought out?

Speaker 2:          01:55:11       I think, I think the way that the system is set up is that this is what bothers me the most about politics, is for some reason you're not allowed to admit fault in politics. You can't be like, I did something. This didn't work out like that. That's the system that set up and that part, that part is like, it is thought out. Whatever decision you made, we're going to make it look like it was the right decision. That's the mistake. That's the major flaw in, in like the political public system. You can't admit to any floor, never, never.

Speaker 6:          01:55:48       If you do, you're going to lose traction and you and you become a flip flopper or whatever.

Speaker 2:          01:55:52       So it's always like what I did was the right thing and that is meticulous. Obviously. It's methodical. It's, it's, it's, it's very well, it's, you know, it's, it's outlined. It's, it's fucking the most depressing thing about it.

Speaker 6:          01:56:07       Oh, it is. The most depressing thing about politics is that politics are real, you know, and that you can, you could lose your fucking life paying attention to it. You know, if you start talking like there's some new Supreme Court justice nominee that Obama likes, it looks like a lesbian and everybody's all bummed out about it and there's all this debate and my God damn, do I really have to fucking think about this? Do I really have to? When you do, supposedly if you're a good citizen, you're supposed to pay attention because lives could change and you know, you could be in a situation where one of her rulings directly affects you. You know? I Dunno man.

Speaker 2:          01:56:40       I Dunno. I Dunno. We're doing that. Tommy was born to tell you about Brian Jacques.

Speaker 6:          01:56:46       Oh, let's. Do you have a story you want to do that? You went to high school or college? College.

Speaker 2:          01:56:51       I went to college with in one night, like a Saturday night. I went to A. I was not in a fraternity, but I went to a party than a fraternity. Had A, I think it was the Pi Kap fraternity, and then as I left, there is a, another fraternity next door. They had like their fraternity house. Right? And I'm walking back and this fucking guy, Brian Jack was his name, he beat up like physically pummeled seven guys and like full fucking Ninja Rambo style, like where it wasn't even like he literally punched the guy and then did like a roundhouse kick and then rolled, did like a fucking, like a somersault and like rolled up and punched another guy and, and just destroyed it were like, it was like a video game. You're like, oh my God, Oh my God. Like, just freaking out watching this guy. Just why did he get in a fight?

Speaker 2:          01:57:43       What happened? He was, he's a total fucking, like he was a very independent, like sort of a loner, like a super athlete. Like had that quality of like, like the, like the best athletes do where it's like unbelievable work ethic when it comes to like, like his working out and training and like just kind of a very peculiar independent dude. And uh, you know, didn't, I mean kind of kept to herself but also didn't like, didn't take any shit from anybody. And he was walking, I think through the yard of the fraternity guys who were dressed in their Sunday best, like they had their, their dockers on and their ties into their dressed up and to the best that I can remember. Somebody said something to him that didn't fucking hit him the right way. Like, like you know, about like maybe walking through lawn or

Speaker 4:          01:58:42       like why he was at their house or something. And I don't remember exactly how it started, but I know how it fucking ended, like Brian Jack fucking laid out everyone who was basically in this fraternity like, and it was like, it was pretty fucking impressive. And I had a front fucking row. What kind of an athlete was this guy? What he, he played football and he was. So it was a big guy. No, he was a not like super big, like, like just a lean, like, uh, I would say like six feet, like two, oh five. But like rock, fucking solid and, and, and, and a little crazy. And he actually, I think played one of the season, like he broke his neck and he kept playing. And even played like Xfl like that, that, that league that came out that was just like, you know, there's not, there aren't any rules. Like he played, he played in that league I think. Anyways, now he's a wrestler. Like I think he's trying to do wwf. And I got a video sent to me. Uh, he calls himself but wild is it on youtube? On Youtube? Yeah. Let's find this guy on youtube. Yeah. And I was like, Holy Shit. Bj. The wrestlers, what he calls himself

Speaker 4:          01:59:56       Buck Wild Bj the wrestler. That's Mickey work.

Speaker 1:          02:00:00       No buck wild as a band. A lot of bad shit on here. Wow. There's a, I don't know, we'll have to find it.

Speaker 4:          02:00:11       There's some bucks. Something as a fucking gay porn star named Buck something or other. And it used to be a woman and she took a. Oh my God, I saw the hormones. Male porn star. But he has a vagina. Hbo fucking Porn showed. Yeah. What is the name? Cornucopia was the name of the name of the guy. I'm sure you fucking people

Speaker 1:          02:00:34       online know about it. Yeah. Um, I dunno. Whatever. That's not important.

Speaker 6:          02:00:43       Your, your, your dude. Beat the fuck out of that guy. Buck Angel. Thank you sir. Thank you. Angel. Yeah, wild will. Dynamic Willie. Dynamic people in your silly names. This whatever. Don't look at buck angel. Just like, I don't want to look at the human centipede and just like, you don't want to look at Russian dudes cutting people's heads off. You don't need to see that.

Speaker 4:          02:01:00       No, no, no. What's the worst thing you've ever seen online? The worst thing I've seen online. Probably some shit that you show me. I remember I was uh, I take great pride in that. I always say that when you send somebody something fucked up, it's like, it's like a bomb. You just wait for them to react. You what's going to hit send and it just goes to them and you know it's going to hit them. The what the fuck. And then they type back and you'd get it in your inbox. Like, I mean, you know, the first time I saw two girls, one cup was very alarming, but one guy, one cup definitely was more like get the fuck outta here. And then one guy, one cup, the most disturbing thing was the scars around his. Well, you know, he's been doing this for awhile or his. How about his basically non-reaction to what's happening. Take the cream and how or even quiver move, right?

Speaker 1:          02:01:51       Yeah. He didn't even buckle. Homeboys got giant chunks of glass and blood coming out of his asshole and he's just fine with it. I mean if you haven't seen it, you don't need to see it. Don't, don't go to one guy. One Cup. Don't go. Don't check that out.

Speaker 4:          02:02:05       Mr Hanson and Mrs Hands were pretty crazy. This is Mrs Hamer, Mrs Hamer. Oh that's the girl gets fired.

Speaker 1:          02:02:13       Oh my God. And that's what they call her. Mrs Hanson.

Speaker 4:          02:02:18       The things that I don't like the most, the things that I can't react to or like the ultra real violent shit. That's the stuff I'm like, I fucking can't do this. I'll do this crazy sexual or whatever. But I'm with you. Larry Berg, the title, the decapitations and shit man. You know the conspiracy theory behind the Nick Bird Shit? No.

Speaker 1:          02:02:39       Those guys are not Arabs that they're actually CIA and they're Americans. Apparently their accents are off. They're too big, like the, they're not built like Arabs. They're like big bulky fat fucking be feeding American psychos and really invested in the idea is that they, uh, they killed a guy to make people more excited. They found some guy over there. He's doing what he's not supposed to be doing, going in a place where he's not supposed to be going. And so they jacked him, arrested him and cut his fucking head off so that he could act as a deterrent for people that want to go and investigate this and can get people enthusiastic about this war. Like, yeah, we got to get these motherfuckers done that they're evil. That's a big PR strategy man. For a guy like that, you know, you could take a guy and use him as a tool.

Speaker 1:          02:03:25       Like Samsung guy finds out some shit. He's not supposed to find out or go somewhere he's not supposed to go. And then, you know, if he can encourage other people to do it, they can have a real problem. They just cut this guy's head off and make a video out of it and now not only will, that shit never happened again, nobody wants to go over there. Now they're cutting your fucking head off and putting it on a video and you see that guy gagging gurgle and make these horrible noises while he still alive in there, saw him through his fucking neck, you know, and it gets people fired up about going to war, you know, an award that's not a very popular war

Speaker 2:          02:03:53       know you got to be a cold like I can, I can under like I can see in certain circumstances, you know, how somebody kills somebody. Like, you know, I mean I understand that there's a level that you cross that like, you know, so somebody could do something where you could kill somebody. Yeah, I understand that human biologically you're going to react if somebody crosses a certain line where it happens. But to cut someone's head off, you'd have to be a savage mother.

Speaker 1:          02:04:20       Especially with a little knife. You're not even losing a fucking going Samurai song through it, through it, you know? I guess, man, there's certain amount of people that feel like, you know, you have a goal and you have a job and you do that job and your objective is to fucking know, do whatever you

Speaker 6:          02:04:38       know, do whatever the orders are and the orders are to kill this guy because you're going to make a video and this guy's going to be a martyr and you know, we're going to use him as a publicity tool. You alright bitch, guess you got to die. You know, I mean, how many fucking people have been killed in interrogations that were innocent? I mean, how many people are in Guantanamo Bay that are innocent? How many people have been killed by accidental bombs and other hit apartment buildings and shit at a certain number? A certain. Certainly you see a certain amount of casualties. I think life starts to get real cheap. You know, we see it a certain amount of collateral damage that happens. It's just a part of the game. I think for a lot of these guys, life just starts to get started to get cheap. Yeah, I think you're right. I think you're right. Scary Shit, man, scary shit. The idea that someone is willing to cut someone's head off for a video, but if you look at like operation northwoods, if you look at that idea, the idea of attacking Americans and blaming on Cubans so that we can go to war. It really fits into the whole like, past scheme of things.

Speaker 2:          02:05:38       Yeah. Yeah. I mean they're definitely all about getting a, you have to get the American people on your side for shit like this. So that's why there's always a big push, you know, we got it. You got to get people to go like, yeah, we got to get them. We've got to get them.

Speaker 6:          02:05:51       God Damn fucking horrible. I'm gonna, uh, take a few questions then we're going to get out of here. It's already five, 13. You didn't watch the UFC this weekend, did you know? So I can't talk too much about the UFC. I'm a pretty interesting because a Josh Koscheck beat up this dude. He fought, he fought Paul Daley and was beating him up, took him down at will. And, uh, at one point in time in the fight, um, he, uh, he got kneed in the face in illegal knee and it didn't look in the replay like it hit him at all, it looked like. And he went down and it was like making it, like he was really badly hurt. I don't know if he was hurting. He says he was so, but it didn't look real. It was, it might've been part of his strategy to fuck with this dude because he was relentless.

Speaker 6:          02:06:39       He taunting and tormenting them. Like he would take them down. He was talking shit to him while I was on top of him beating him up and the guy just could not get up. And every time he wanted to he took them down in the last 30 seconds. He's just talking shit to this dude while he's on top of him always trying to gouge his eyes when he's on the bottom. It was crazy, man. And he was just like, I don't know what the fuck he said, but whatever he said it was driving him nuts. So anyway, the bell ends to the round. He gets off the students, starts to walk away and Paul daily walks up behind him like when like walks up behind the referee, walks up to him and sucker punches him after the fight was over. Yeah, it gets booted from the UFC for life, which you know, can't do that, you know that, that you can't have a fight and then try to sucker punch a guy because you didn't get to hit them for 15 minutes because he was too good because it was taking you down and he was imposing his game plan on you and they sucker punch.

Speaker 6:          02:07:31       I'm daily as booted for life. For Life. Yeah. He fucked up you and, and Dana White got really Paris. He asked him a question like, you asked him apparently after the fight was over, do you, uh, do you still want to fight in the UFC and you know, like why are you doing shit like this is like any like shrug his shoulders and walked away and Dana White was like, good, well now you want, I'll make that decision for you and just like, you can't do shit like that if you do, you've got to keep your composure. Like you talk a lot of shit before the fight. And He, this guy talks mad shit. Like that's his thing. And cost check talks mad shit too. So Paul Dale and construct which is going back and forth and back and forth. And it generated an incredible amount of interest in the fight.

Speaker 6:          02:08:07       But it also put an incredible amount of pressure on him and when he was getting his ass kicked and, and when it was over and it just got molested for fucking three rounds, like an end of the knee, which may or may not have hit cost check. And you know, it made it look like a big deal. And Kasha Globe was lying on her stomach and it was like making it look like he was out. And then when the referee said to him, referee said, get up. I saw the replay Denberg Eliade goes, get up. I saw the replay. It didn't hit you. He goes, well, can you give us vaseline? None of my eye.

Speaker 1:          02:08:34       And he gets the vaseline was, it goes back to fighting like normal. Like what happened if you were almost dead just a few seconds ago.

Speaker 6:          02:08:41       So it was, I think that was all part of his psychological strategy to just fuck that dude's head up and it works. Hook, line and sinker.

Speaker 1:          02:08:48       I really did. And then at the end of the fight, we're fucking Montreal. Okay. Montreal's in the middle of this huge playoff. The Canadians against Pittsburgh. So he goes and he grabs the microphone, who's don't worry about it because picked going to kick your fucking ass shit. And they go nuts. I mean, you never seen anybody like a sport or love hockey more than the Canadian. Oh my God. Do they go nuts? And then he said Nafta, that I'm going to beat GSP and you'll have to fucking losses. And they went nuts and they, you know, and he leaves. But meanwhile the dude is a fucking master strategist when it comes to that shit. Yeah. I mean, he's a, he'll, he's playing the heel and everyone will be so excited to see his friends. Of course there's fucking brilliant man generates so much more interest and made himself a great villain. Right? He's a fucking these. Where's the black hat and the business, you know. So. So he did that. But dude, the fucking disappointment in the Canadians when he goes, don't worry about it because is going to kick your fucking ass next week. They were like, it was like you said something about their mother mad. They were so fucking good. I

Speaker 6:          02:09:53       do. They were so upset. I've never seen a crowd more universally excited about a sport and a team than the Canadians are about their hockey dude. When they won, we got there Thursday night and they won and they won from behind. It came from behind them one and when we were driving right when we were driving the game got out and they want and the fucking cab drivers town us. Oh, he's talking to us in France to, you know, this franchise thing. They want to fund the leader to the hood and bag. They could not hold him back. He took the mic, the go. They tried to stop him. He couldn't stop him and he's fucking crazy. He's beeping his arm and everybody else's beeping alarm. It was a fucking party down the street. Every car was honking their horn. People were jumping on top of the hoods, cars and screaming

Speaker 2:          02:10:34       and yelling and everyone in a big smile on their face like you've never seen so many people, united people that weren't at the game because people that were leaving the game, they were fine up to everybody on the street. It's like family. It's like your family. Yeah, Dude. It's a level of love for a sport and a team. They must take it hard though when those guys lose. Oh God. Yeah. That's devastating to them. I've been in Vancouver when like, I think it wasn't even like the an NHL team. I think it was like a, like a club league team was playing, like their club team was playing and businesses shut down. People were on the streets for a game like there. Everything's going to be different tonight. That's crazy, man. That's crazy. You don't see that in America, but not more.

Speaker 1:          02:11:15       At least when I was a kid, the red sox, when the red sox won the world series was the bill buckner when the, when the ball went through his leg, that was a big goddamn deal. The whole, the whole city was into that and people that, that have been a very similar situation. They had won the world series back then. I think maybe it's still like that. I don't, I'm just not in Boston anymore, but I don't think it is. I don't remember it ever being the intensity level that it wasn't Canada and Canada. Those motherfuckers, they, they, they loved it. Man. You see this guy, Laura's vilks, he's the Swedish, the Swedish. I'm a cartoonist that drew the, uh, the image of Muhammad with his body, a of Mohammed's head on the body of a dog. He's, they're all trying to do, but trying to kill him for like two years before I heard about him.

Speaker 1:          02:11:59       Like drawing it. Is that actual footage of the attack? Yeah. Look at this shit. They did a, I won't put the volume on, it don't matter anyway because it's a, it's all in, in a, I guess it's in Swedish, the Swedish. So that's him right there. So he's showed us this video on religion and uh, during the middle of the video on religion, all these Muslims apparently a super offended. They run up and they tackle him and punch him in the head. It's one dude punches him in the head, that guy, and then they have to fucking tear gas people and they all start screaming. Allah Akbar. Oh, they're all, all. Yeah, they're all there to go after this guy. They're all there to attack this guy. It's crazy man. And they're all angry and they're young. They're students. They have fucking laptops and cameras and shit. And they really truly believe that this guy's a piece of shit for drawing their guy.

Speaker 1:          02:12:49       Yeah man. Scary shit man. This kind of type of fundamentalism and retarded thinking is very frightened. She, that guy just hit that guy for no reason. Look at a faggy way through that punch to indent the weak as shit. They're fucking sad looking at. Oh Man. Yeah. Nuts man. Look at him. He got some weekends. Cops there, man. I think that's a chick. Oh, isn't it? You can control. She's got terrible. So I control. So that's tricky. Is that a trick? I think she should break that arm. She got it right there. You just take that arm. Um, if you haven't seen the video, it's, it's unremarkable other than the fact that it's just another group of retarded fucking religious people screaming and yelling. They're the most scary because Christians, you know, you're allowed to draw Jesus. You know, Jesus. This is

Speaker 2:          02:13:32       so fucking crazy things rather guy to actually to like to validate that point of view. It was ridiculous.

Speaker 1:          02:13:39       Oh, it's so scary though, man. It's so scary that this is still going on in 2010 and not only are these guys like these college students, but these guys are actually, you know, they have laptops, they're in their hands while they're there. They have, you know, they have cameras, digital cameras, they have access to the Internet. They even have like forums and message boards and shed where they go and you know, like the south park guys, the ones who wanted to kill South Park and then somebody hacked them. Just see that. No, I didn't know it was awesome. Somebody hacked him in the picture was a Muslim guy kissing another guy and uh, the whole background was like all like Mohammed's head with a bomb in his turban and the left an email address for these guys to um, less than an email address for these guys to a um, a two email them contact though. That's hospital

Speaker 2:          02:14:31       that but liquid. Is it just me or this road and look like he was talking to a future outta shape version. That's hilarious. Best guests. Okay. So far.

Speaker 1:          02:14:39       Says this guy, Thomas you girl. We're looking on our forums. It's a forum, [inaudible] dot Joe Rogan.net and that is, uh, that's the, uh, the main forum for my website. It's pretty fucking crazy website. It's all the podcasts. Go on there. I used to put a lot of, um, I used to put a lot of blogs up and I still will write some, but right now I'm in the middle of writing a, a, a movie. So, or moving no, a book. And so I got an idea for a movie, but I'm, I'm writing a book and once I'm done with that then I'll be doing a lot more blogs again. But I got a couple more months to write this book. Mostly about standup comedy in my early days, like crazy stories and shit. Obama's a fucking liar. During the campaign he was listening to his ipod playlist. That's true.

Speaker 1:          02:15:26       See he knows how to use a fucking ipod. Yes. Rivalries. You are correct sir. Obama is a fucking liar. I am. I don't know why that's annoying to me, but that shit is very, very annoying. I hear wearing gold jewelry and one part of the Nick Berg video. You can see a military cap move in front of the camera. He was working on phone lines. He was working on a tower over in Abu Ghraib. He took digital pictures of inside Abu Ghraib, hence the kidnapping, so that's why they killed that guy and that's obviously a conspiracy theory, but my man rivalries. But that would make sense if that guy had witnessed, you know, the Abu Ghraib, a atrocities before we're talking about the guy who got his head cut off when he said that he was actually, his head was cut off by CIA guys. It totally makes sense. You know, I think they'd be willing to do something like that. What the fuck do I know? Man? I don't got no solutions folks. I only got questions. You got any solutions? Tommy Vaughn answers to anything. No, that's the goddamn problem is that there are no answers. We need a radical restructuring of our entire fucking society, our entire

Speaker 6:          02:16:30       world, and that's not going to happen anytime in our lifetimes. So what do we. Did we put a patch on things? No, you try to control your micro world. That's what you do, ladies and gentlemen, this is my advice. You want some advice, control all the people that are around you, control what you do for a living, control your body, control your mind, control how you treat other people and what kind of treatment you'll accept from other people. If you do that, and if that shit spreads and if people learn by your example, then you really can make a change and a difference right there. Absolutely. Make a small change, a small difference locally, sort of like politics, local politics, work, you know like you can, if you're a, a local town, you can choose to, you know, put up a stop sign in an area where the people need to stop because there's some accidents, you know, you can vote on that and that shit will actually happen and it'll actually become something. State, state politics. There's state laws that can get changed. You know, the medical marijuana law in California is a clear example of that. They voted like, yeah, the medical marijuana is helpful for people. Let's vote. Let's make it a real announcer reality. But federally, man, you don't get to vote on Shit like that federally. You don't get to vote on shit like that when it comes to the whole country

Speaker 2:          02:17:37       and you can make changes in your life and people's lives around you too. If you want to fucking like talking about you can, you can get away from shit that's not affecting you in a good way and get away from the people that are not good for you. And that's what you do

Speaker 6:          02:17:51       can control. You, can control what you're directly affect the people in your life, the way you think, the way you behave. You can control all that. You know, the real problem with us is that we have so much more access to human beings and to, to connecting to each other than we ever had in the past. That's why people or they feel like they can be so douchey on message boards because there's no social consequence. There's no consequence to emailing someone on my space and just saying nasty, fucked up shit to them. You know, I make comics. Have you talked to. They get horrible fucking messages on facebook, on twitter, and dudes just say shit, just to get attention.

Speaker 2:          02:18:26       People. Yeah, there's no, there's no consequences. No Accountant.

Speaker 6:          02:18:29       Why would they even want to reach out to someone like that? Why would they even want to do that? Like what? What, what is that all about? Well, it's all about the same thing. It's all about we've lost some sort of a connection with each other because there's too fucking many of us. That's why local shit is the only shit that works, you know, small groups, the people that you actually impact, like the people that you impact in your personal life, the people that you impact, the local politics, people, the impact that your job and in, in, in whatever the fuck you do for your living, you know, how you impact those people don't. That shit's all real. It's just the matter is how do you get it to work like that with the whole big giant group? Yeah. Yeah. You don't, man, we're fucking rambling. We're not saying shit anymore. Two hours and a half later, that's usually the end of the podcast. Ladies and gentlemen, we come to a point of no point. Yeah, it's the Zen ending, but no conclusion. A lot of good points were made before we got to know point. Yeah. Your friend who's a fucking ass ass

Speaker 1:          02:19:28       in slacks and tie. Shit and fuck with him. Don't fuck with that. Made a point. Brian job. We made a point. Let's review everything we learned. Don't drink a whole mouthful of Ghb. That's just terrible for you. That's really bad and your parents will be disappointed. You don't wait until you're 40 years old. You decided you want to be a standup comedian. Don't do that. It's likely that you're not Robert Schimmel. Yes, likely. And if you are a a funny person and you are funny, standup comedian and you don't assume that you have to live your life the same way that got you there with no discipline and no self control. You can get your shit together. Even though neither Tommy nor myself have our shit together. Shit. Go by Tommy's CD. It's called thrilled. He's fucking hilarious. A bank on it. He's worked with me many times.

Speaker 1:          02:20:17       You might have seen him with me and we were in Sydney, Australia. Together. We've done. And what else did we do? Did we do San Francisco together within San Francisco? San Jose, San Jose. We've done a bunch of gigs together. Fucking hilarious. Comedian Thomson. [inaudible] DOT com. Yes. S E G U R a.com. Please follow him on twitter. It's Thompson Guerra just right and I have links for my itunes and Amazon. And now you are officially on the Joe Rogan podcast promoting the Thompson thrilled CD. It will now below the fuck up your twitter. I guarantee you by the end of the day you will have 10 more twitter followers. Nice. I can at least guaranteed 10. I guaranteed to purchases of this cd because of this. That would not have happened. I fucking really appreciate that motherfucker. We also learned by the way, that you can masturbate in a whole new way. Yes. Fuck this. It's way better than your fist and yes, I am sponsored by fleshlight, but if it sucked, I would quit the sponsorship and I will tell you I would not sell you anything, but I don't think is real.

Speaker 1:          02:21:20       I will guarantee you this. I'm not saying that I'll never have sponsors, but what I am saying that I will never try to endorse something that I don't think is an awesome product and this is a goddamn awesome product and it's for beating off which I'm for 12 feeding off. Ladies and gentlemen, thank you very much for tuning into the podcast. We will see you next week. Next Tuesday, same bat time, same bat channel 3:00 PM Pacific and last Mrs. Rogan. Bus out the baby because she was ready to do it any day. Now. That might fuck up my schedule, but either way the weekly podcast will continue. I will keep you informed on twitter. Thank you everybody. Thank you very much for tuning in. I love you bitches. I'll see you soon. Thank you.