r8hggGc_IvM.txt

Speaker 1:          00:00:00       There we go. Beautiful. Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to day 25, Brian, 25, 25 week, week 25. You stream podcasts. We've got a double podcast week. We're getting crazy. Today is my good friend. Mad Flavor, Aka Joe t as in the motherfucking house, one of the funniest human beings I've ever met in my life. I've known joey for about a decade. Oh, before we go anywhere before we get started. Fleshlight.com. We are sponsored by the flashlights and this is the butthole version of the fleshlight. It's sponsoring the podcast. If you go to a Joe Rogan.net and click the link, you get like a discount. Joey Diaz. Have you ever seen one of those in persona? That little burp it up and explain it to me. They'll say, let's talk about it. This is the one that I haven't fucked so you can touch it with your finger in there and tell me that's the butthole version.

Speaker 1:          00:00:58       Those the butthole. Is there a vaginal birth yet so far is really retarded. How perverted either. Could you imagine if the vaginal one went out of style? Because nobody wanted to fuck it. It's like everyone's just wanted the asshole. Well it is tighter. So you think everyone would want to fuck because everyone likes tight pussy. Fucking square. It was a good big Scott to be like a fucking square. I love it. I love it. This is tremendous. You got to fuck one of these things I'm telling. Are you fucking crazy? It's way better the beat. Now if you bit off right? So you grab it like this and just go like this. Like a little fish in the bucket. Some fish in the bucket. It's just take the piss out of the bucket. That's your move. Dude. I don't want to check this out. How awesome is this fish in the bucket?

Speaker 1:          00:01:40       Look at that thing. That's how you wash. It pulls out it wiggles. So you come in that thing and there's a cap on the bottom. When you undo the cap, your load comes from. I love hanging out with these guys because technology, they always keep me up. This shit. You know what I'm saying? We're up to the latest. This is the latest in masturbation. Technical people hanging out with that disappeared. This is show up with a box with all of the product. There's a solid product and this product comes under a lot of unnecessary heat, in my opinion. Now, let me ask you, what if you want to go the other way? There's this come in different colors. What if you want to fuck? You know what I'm saying? He had a brown one. You get a Hindu one. We've got to find that. They got to.

Speaker 1:          00:02:19       Or a slum dog. Millionaire. One smells like a fucking lottery. Tickets. There's a difference. A bunch of different colors there has. We can't just be white. That's prejudice. There's 2010. You got to mix it up a little bit. Shit is this. I mean, yeah. I guess I would do a black on her mother as well. One of the Asian one and what? The little muffler. Slowly twice cooked pork, but there's a reason why like the black ones show the cross. How dirty it is. More probably, you know, it gets white. What's it going to say? Black and she'd be a little too high. What are you talking about? Okay. We're on the front page and I just see nothing but white pussy. Yeah, let's

Speaker 2:          00:03:00       go with the champagne collection. They have a loop, a version of it. You know who Lupez all white buzzy. The Puerto Rican singer from the 17th. No, Lupa is this new porn star. They have a loop, a version of the flashlight, and I was just at the hardrock x fans convention and she was there. Man, that chick is amazing. She's like four feet tall, but yet the proportions perfect of a regular female, like everything's fits perfect. This looks like a little girl now, like a midget. I wonder if you can get a blue one so you can pretend you're fucking that avatar. They have vampires. Vampire ones. They should totally make it. Twilight ones. Do you say the twilight one? Flesh lines. They have things. They swear to God. They have fangs in the tube that goes down that, you know, rubs against your Dick has like fangs on the tube or something like that.

Speaker 2:          00:03:45       So it's like fucking a vampire pussy because I know you'd like vampires better than where it was. Have you lost your fucking mind? You. You're so big. That's 100 percent true. All of that is that in Werewolf who loves do you said you liked him last week better, right? Goodness. And I've been thinking about this whole time because he likes making shit up. Brian's, you didn't say that. You didn't say you were choosing just back to the eighth grade silly eighth grader right now. Outside when you're not supposed to be there. Right. You got out of the gymnasium when you and your buddies got high and now you're cracking jokes on them. You're back in Columbus, Ohio right now. Wait, wait, wait, wait. What's going on here? Your barbecue barbecued. I know you are because I am and I'm listening to you talk and I'm like, this kid is too high.

Speaker 2:          00:04:34       I got to help him out of here. I got to pull them out. Pull out of this conversation. But they do have a vampire fleshlight. That's unbelievably ridiculous, but I'm more of a Werewolf guy, so that's why it's ridiculous. I don't even like vampire really tired of vampire movies. The wolf man sucked. Okay. I did not like that movie. It was dom just didn't work and I still bought the fucking blue. Right. Okay. How about that? That's how much I am. Uh, was there any special features? Search itunes for werewolf movies, Bro. Do you get this? I watched werewolf movies that are terrible. You know why? Because I know there's going to be at least a guy's going to turn into a werewolf and flux and people up. So you know what I do? I watched the beginning to get their names. Okay. This is Bob.

Speaker 2:          00:05:12       This is. Okay. Let me just know what the fuck's going on. Let me fast forward until I see solar turtle where all fucking the best latest technology and the dude turned to werewolf and just fucking people up is. I just think those are the craziest movies. The idea that I show American Werewolf in London got me hooked. Yeah, that was 1981 and I was aware will fan. I was done, but we still do other shit like Lon Chaney member. Like the problem with this wolf man movie, they went with a mask. It's Benicia del Toro and a mask and he's like, and his lower jaw sticks. I show the transformation with the arms and the fucking thing, you know, they do. I mean there's a lot of, a lot of cool. There's a lot of cool CGI in the transformation, but the final product just looks.

Speaker 2:          00:05:58       It just doesn't look right because it's like he tried to use the old wolf man from like the 19 forties or whatever the fuck it was. He was at Claude rains, I think it was, to try to use that version of the wolf man and just make a more modern, updated look after you go to American Werewolf in London, you can't go backwards. You can't because American Werewolf in London, that fucking thing was evil man. It was like a dog person. Demon thing was on a four legs because that I'm blurring just for cats on Blu Ray. I got that Shit's on. And like when they're running from it and you just see it, they did that movie so well. You don't really get to see it that much because the technology was not that good. The only one time you get to actually see the Werewolf, he's going through the streets of London, snap and people's heads off from everyone who was running through the streets.

Speaker 2:          00:06:42       Nobody's freaking out and car accidents and shit. That's the only time you get to see it moving around every other time in the movie. It's like you're barely see it, but you see it enough that it's fucking terrifying. And the transformation scene just off the chain, you know, that's the kind of shit that we had in 1981. Okay. Now what do they have? They have vampires that don't bite people and where to just growl at everybody and can change back and forth when they want. What the fuck have we come to the fuck are we? Tell them to joey,

Speaker 1:          00:07:11       bro. I can't even. I've never watched the twilight's, but I've seen what those two little fucking half a fruit cakes look like. I can't believe they're vampires. Vampires are bad. Motherfucker bottom. His College. That's a vampire shadows and you know when you were vampire, you fuck guys, you fuck chicks. It don't matter. You Ain't gay. You just slinked Dick, you fucking dogs. It don't matter. You a fucking animal. You know what I'm saying right now, Gary Oldman, Gary, get the fuck these vampires a tool. I don't know how to say it. The to me, it's Disney. It's. We've got a whole group of kids now that are growing up with horrible mediocre entertainment that's designed just for them as opposed to when we were kids were so fucking kids shows you add sesame street, you know, you had a, a fucking, a couple other different shows, you know, that you could wash it, but like kid oriented shows and everything else was a fucking adult show.

Speaker 1:          00:08:07       But the only kid show I ever watched was Betty Hill, like a motherfucker. Anyway, that was a kid. I was really fucking great. Every once in a while they show you a tinder or a great point. You were six. You last for a week. He was like the first guy to figure out that very simple combination. Tits, tits, tits and comedy and silliness and, and started the accident way before gender. Massada high. The linguistic. The answer the phone. Unless people do make you think that shit is legit, Susan, for those late night infomercials. So as an English person describing some products like God, people pay more attention. They think they're cooler or something. When you meet a chick that has an accent from over there, I don't know, but it makes her like two levels hotter.

Speaker 2:          00:08:56       Know you think, well you know English dude. Say that to Dave Bishop says out of American girl, that American accent, he said he just so hot. Damn.

Speaker 3:          00:09:03       I'm your soulmate dexter.

Speaker 2:          00:09:08       Yeah. There's an English chicken, Chinese chicken. The why would have English accent. Oh, you talked to her. You lose your fucking. Yeah. You might want to take a yoga class that check. Yeah. No, she's a very nice. That's a strong. That's a strong combo right there. That's a double exotic. You know, that's a proper exotic and another exotic on top of that. Oh, you got to hear him. But a strong one too, you know, look like a fucking guy in the life up. You know what I'm saying? Shit like that breaks up with you and starts fucking some new guy. And you know what kind of pussy she's slinging at him. You know what kind of crazy shit she's doing to him. You know, she said to put it in my ass saying crazy shit with that English accents to fuck you up. People worshiped him saying you can't eat Chinese food or watch fucking beverly hills.

Speaker 2:          00:09:50       No more flashbacks. It's horrible for her. Favorite Shit. She links to get fucked in the mouth. My mouth. Was He hard competition? Was he hard competition you have. Is that the American version of Benny Hill? Because it seems like it's a TV show was. It was a variety show country. They used to have like songs. They would play songs. They would do like sketches. Listen, it was a dumb ass show, but when I was a kid I enjoyed it. I used to go there for boobs also. I remember Benny Hill and he hollered my to like, I'll watch that. He will have cleavage. Yeah. They had the blogs with Benny Hill would show you it as something and they wouldn't catch it on channel nine and those days. So he got away with murder. You know what? I'm saying Benny Hill was the first guy to have like a real silly showing him chasing after girls and you know, that famous song that they use all fucking stressed as hard on this country has forgotten about the heart on.

Speaker 2:          00:10:40       No fucking respect to the heart on your right. Benny Hill always. That's because there's too many people. Do you think that when when there gets overpopulation naturally people get more reluctant to hide shit like that. We took, we disregarded the heartland because they got cialis. No it shouldn't. Nobody would fucking beverly hills. So they're just too common. The hard ons to common now because of big, because of a dick pills don't matter. I see. In the old days it was a big deal. It was a big deal because you can take fucking pills. You know what I'm saying? Like the old days, a 62 year old guy that had a harder and it was like, wow, that guy is excited. Whoa. Get Him. He's got a boner and 62. What'd you now? It's like, oh, that'll creep. He's on fucking Viagra. Look at them.

Speaker 3:          00:11:20       Have you done any research on these GNC versions of Viagra that, that, that are big right now? They're almost like, you know, there's just a bunch of vitamins and stuff like that. Flashlight was telling us about that. Telling us about one that works, the one that actually had vicodin Viken invite Viagra in it as a good 30 percent of. It was weird to me because I wonder why it works. They of course they had a booth like that at that. This x fans party I went to and the guys were selling it and was like, I'm no doctor. I'm like, yeah, what's in this? And I was looking through it and it was probably 300 different

Speaker 2:          00:11:54       routes in like fucking bird tiers in Agora Shit that works, you know, because all those routes and shared those aren't going to work on a 60 year old dick. You know, all you know, taking your fucking Gingko Biloba. That's not going to give you a boner when you're 80, you know. But viagara will fucking rocket via grower will rock it. Ever taken phrase 72 when he tells me the stories, how he's banging this shit out of fucking stays home Sunday through. He walks a refund park every morning for miles that he goes home, eats Viagara, buxom chick the debt. Wow. That's like a 30 year old chicken. He was driving. He goes back and remember Brian Holtzman rubbed by Agra because now these young girls that go out with these old rich guys, they have to fuck them now for that video and his load, his load. It's like paint that's been sitting in your basement for a year.

Speaker 2:          00:12:57       It's not a fresh product. Ladies and gentlemen, Remember that? Remember that bit? Brian Holtzman, Brian Holtzman, ladies and gentlemen is probably one of the funniest guys that unfortunately you're not going to hear up. Are you not going to see on TV? You're not going to see them as special. I hope you do. Unless you get it at the comedy store. Does he still even go there? I heard factory. Unless it gives you a ticket with a little beach, right? Fucking guy that was in a parking meter. Maid combination dog catcher. Which. How funny is he is a fucking dog. He's a goddamn reality show waiting to happen. Someone follow him around. He's the meter man dog catcher and he's Brian Holtzman, one of the funniest comics streak, and you give him a fucking a camera in front of him and Mike and mom. That's a great reality. Show somebody out there act on this.

Speaker 2:          00:13:42       Can you get ahold of Brian Haltzman? But Brian ultimate is like, well, there's only a few guys like that that you meet in your life. And you go, Oh man, this motherfucker like what? What happened? Like, why didn't, why didn't anybody see this? Why he's so good. Why doesn't anybody see that? You know, like brody Stevens is another one. Brody's got some stuff going on. He was in the hangover and you know, he's got good friends that are really funny. Guys respect him, but fruit is should be a national headliner. He should be fucking killing it all over the country. People should be like buying tickets to see him in advance and looking forward to getting fired up at Brody's in town. But you know what, the weird thing about brody Stevens, I almost don't want him to get that famous because I love just watching Chelsea lately and seen like miscellaneous parts in the movie, the hangover and stuff like that.

Speaker 2:          00:14:28       It's like kind of like a hidden game. Like find brody Stevens out of nowhere. No, no, no. I know. I obviously, I don't mean to, it's kind of Nice. Kind of cool. Only knowing who he is at the store lately. He hasn't been getting spots when we get the man show. Brody was the warmup guy and his warmups were so fucking funny. You can tell the same joke 10 times in a row and I, I'll ask for it, you know, I'll keep you on out. Did you do any modeling? And it'll, it'll do his whole fucking. That whole piece that he doesn't bottle in Beirut, Pakistan on the cover of camel beach. Enjoy it. What's ready? Stevens at twitter name. We just throwing that out. Brody's. Brody's friends. Yeah. I'm brody's brody's friend. Follow this guy. This guy is quite the, but he's a fucking great human being.

Speaker 2:          00:15:22       At least like six in the morning and he has the cutest dog that has the most human face I've ever seen in my life or this is so hilarious. Let me go back to Seattle with brody brody when they used to drive his car to the Gig harbor and he used to cry that was speeding in this car. Tell us a classic brody story. We put them in the truck and drove to Gig harbor. He told me they would take them two hours and I said, I'll bet you any amount of money I could do it. Not when. He's like, no you can't. And we put them in the backseat with soundgarden blast and they kept saying, global people don't live like this. I'm doing fucking right hand lane, cutting off. He's like, Stop Joe Diaz. I would not want to be in the car with you.

Speaker 2:          00:16:04       Reckless driving. If I was high, that's tonight. He stopped the show because there was a bunch of head shots on the wall and he stopped the show because there was no Jews on the wall. Not One fucking jewelry. That black people, you got white people. Whereas the Jews, next time I come here, I want a Jew on the wall. Brody gets these bad late nights spots or at least he used to at the store and you know, sometimes he'd get up there and the crowd would be dead. There'd be no one left, like, you know, the show starts at 8:00 at night or something like that. And Brody would be on like after 1:00 AM 1:45 or something like that. He'd go on and he would just start playing the drums. He would pull chairs up and pull out as drumsticks and start playing the drums and just start ad libbing and fucking around.

Speaker 2:          00:16:41       And before, you know, you had a fucking show showed there was eight people there, but that, that was all rock and eight, you know. And that's, that's one thing that, that creepy place was the best best giving you those little tiny ass crowds, those tiny ass crowds where there was no one in the audience and people barely paying attention. But every now and then someone would go up and just do something magical in that zero crowd. Eight people was all I needed. Let me tell you, let me tell the story about you. Joey Diaz. One night we were at the comedy store and it's one of those nights where it was just, it was kind of dead. It was it a Sunday that when you went to, when you get onstage and you were doing the [inaudible] while I was a Saturday and the mainland and it was late at night. There was nobody. This is the early day. There was the comedy store. Went through some dark periods where we got real bad crowds for a long time, you know, and this was. This was like pre fear factor, right? This was a long time ago. Yeah, between this fact. Okay. So. So it's one of these late nights and there's only maybe like fucking literally like five audience members left in this main room and joey goes onstage and Joe, he tells him to put up with at Wartburg, tells him and he fucking

Speaker 4:          00:17:50       cranks war pig and Joey fucking sings along, takes his shirt off and screaming into the microphone on key with every lyric and the place goes fucking bananas. And Bananas. I had to say it there because that's what it was. Everybody was going nuts. Everybody came in from the fucking kitchen. All the comics that were still left in the. Our came in to talk to you in the parking lot. Came in by the time joey was offstage, it went from 10 people to the only 30 people that were in the whole fucking building. And we were just clapping and laughing. It was like, there's these magical moments where, you know, a dude just hit some rare place on stage where he's just free as fuck. And that place, that place at the comedy store. There was so many of those moments. When did you, when you did it, it was, it was, it was such the moment.

Speaker 4:          00:18:42       It was so real because there was no one there, there was no one there. It wasn't like you could see large audiences. Sometimes you can trick them, you can sing, you know, and sound like fucking, you know, some other singer and they, they clap and they love you. And in the end they give you a big standing ovation. But it's really a bunch of dumb shit, you know, you've just entertained them sufficiently, but you're not going to get that kind of response at all. Like five people when there's only five people there. You've got to give them some real shit. It's gonna to come from some crazy place inside you when there's like five or six people. There can be no fat in your act. That's where your jokes sounds so gross and jokey. They like all the unnecessary parts. Your Act, they just seemed so stupid because now you're only talking to a few people.

Speaker 1:          00:19:26       It teaches you. That's one thing I give the comedy store. I'll never take away from the comedy store. I never hit magical moments like that in another club. The original room and the main room emphasis on the original room after midnight, see a lot of comments. She'll talk like I'm getting for 15 spots. Little do you know for a guy like me at 1215 spot is a gold because I go in there and do what the fuck I want to do. Which is really what comedy really isn't a way. You know? It's unprepared. You go in there, if you go up there with three of your jokes about me and my girlfriend broke up, it's going to be a long, 15 minutes, you know that, and that's what the comedy store pull data. You pulled that out to entertain for. I love going up and that'd be four people. That's my world. That's my fucking world. Five hundred. That's my world for five people on Tuesday nights, somewhere at the sentence. That's as fun as it gets.

Speaker 4:          00:20:14       Start laughing and rocking. It's so genuine. You know? Those moments are so genuine. It's so. There's no fat, no small crowds, man. It's a totally different style of comedy and that's something I realized when I started doing larger venues. Sometimes it's harder sometimes to get you to be like one-on-one reel with a large venue because like you don't want to give them too much, like dead air taught him. You don't want to give them too much time to contemplate. There's too many people. It's just too hard to control all of them anyway. It's more, it becomes more of like a show. Whereas like if you're doing it for like just a few people, there's something fucking crazy about that man. Every is dangerfield story where we did call me like four different guys did comedy for two people. We were at dangerfield show as part started, like, you know, 8:00 or something like that.

Speaker 4:          00:20:57       My spot was at like 9:30. I got there at 9:00 and everybody's just waiting in the bar. I'm like, what's going on? Like, no one's here. No one, no one, no crowd at all. Nothing. So what do we do? We leave now. We're gonna wait for people to show up, see if nobody shows up. So we went, okay. And were there for maybe 15 minutes and a couple walks in. And now there was a guy bobby who was the dorm and this big fucking powerlifting, Scottish guy. He was this guy who used to do power lifting with fucking bags of cement. He would take bags of cement and pour them into those big white plastic buckets and do fucking power lifting with them. I mean, it's just just, uh, a gorilla, just a gorilla of a man in a crazy sense of humor. So the people who've probably way funnier than 99 percent of the comedians that ever worked at Dangerfield funnier than me when I was a kid for sure.

Speaker 4:          00:21:40       I was like, how come this guy is the doorman? He's fucking hilarious. And um, you know, some Dildo to do stand up without a view of the world yet, you know, and, and I'm, I'm the one on stage. So anyway, the, the couple walks in and he goes, come back this way, ladies and gentleman shows up to stop, you know, it's crazy. Scottish accent. It's terrible impression of him by the way, pulls them down. System down to people like sitting in this room, like we're by ourselves. What's going on? Ladies and gentlemen? Welcome that danger fields, please welcome your host. And whoever the fuck the host and the host goes out there by himself and he does stand up for this couple and he does like 20 minutes and then he brings on the next act. The next act is a half an hour. Then it brings up the next act and he doesn't half an hour and then they brought on me and I did a half an hour and I brought on until all these fucking people sat there and watched a whole comedy show, just two people and they sat through the whole thing.

Speaker 4:          00:22:24       They probably felt trapped, but they probably had a blast too. They had a blast event from a different. There was some good comics. There were some good comics that night. Danger fields was a good place to work out. It's very similar to the comedy store and nobody was there that was going to watch you. There was no industry people there. You know, danger fields is not where you're gonna meet your manager or your agent. It's just weird little club that only the comics like because in a place like the comedy store, the good thing about like a lot of people like, well, industry won't come to the comedy store. I'm like, well you don't. You don't get this kind of a club. This kind of an atmosphere. If the agencies want to come here, they don't want to come to this kind of place. They want to come to the kind of place where they're taken care of.

Speaker 4:          00:23:02       It's very professional and the manager takes care of their tab and seats them and shake their hand and kiss their ass. The comedy store never gave a fuck about the agents. They don't give a fuck about you. You don't even get free tickets. Fuck you. And the only way they get free tickets have you call in. You say, Hey, I need two tickets from my agent. Then the agent gets free tickets. If the agents on his own, he's fucked. You know you're going to have to pay costs 20 bucks and this guy over here, he's going to take your money. They, they don't do that in other clubs, but because of that, that place was just this place where you just saw wild shit. I saw your deck there at least 100 times. There was at least a hundred times with Joe. He pulled his dick out as, this is the way I got to tell this. The first time, girl, what's her? That's

Speaker 2:          00:23:46       what the fuck's her name? A female comic or the one that sued on barrel name? Judy. Judy. Judy can see it. Okay, so this is what happens. She goes on to state, we shouldn't have said her name. She goes onstage. So she's. She's on stage and she's not doing very well and we're all barbecued. We're high as fuck. It's eight people. It's a Monday night, Monday night know there's nobody there. There's no one there. It was a small crowd. So she's on stage. Joey goes into the back area. There's like this backstage area that's like in the or the or is a small room. It only seats about a buck 50, but it does have a stage with a little backstage area. So Joey goes into the back stair, Jj area. He goes to the backstage area. It takes off all his clothes and he waits and so she's doing her act and when she gets to her punchlines, she hits the punchline and Joey opens the curtains and shakes his dick and then closes them up real quick and the people go crazy and you see this spark in her eye like working.

Speaker 2:          00:24:46       I can finally doing it. Oh my God. Now I see what it's like. I could do it all. You could see her loosen up and get confident. You could see her relax and every time she had a punchline, joy would pop up in their current shakes closer and the people were fucking just stopping their feet laughing, slapping their tables. She'd never did know that you did that. If she ever knew she never needed them, we couldn't break her heart. She thought that she was on the phone. She had so much confidence. The next time you remember the last, the next time we saw her on stage at the same jokes, just just didn't, didn't work. It was like the same day she had the magic that she had for one night and she didn't even know. I wonder if she's like, thinking back to what she ate that night.

Speaker 2:          00:25:31       Like I got to eat the same food everyday and she's been eating Heiko Baloney sandwiches for the last 20 years. It's hard to talk shit about any booze now. Funny because nobody's fighting in the beginning. You know? It's like how come some people figure out how to be funny and some people don't. I mean, funny is a strange thing. There's some folks that, you know, they might be intelligent, they might be cooled and met with. There's something about them that's just not funny, you know? And it's just that no matter how hard they try for whatever reason, it just doesn't seem to connect with. I know guys who have been open Micros for 20 years. Right. You know those guys. Yeah, they're happy. They're, some of them, some of them still can't figure out what the fuck it is, you know, it's been falling like really weird people on twitter.

Speaker 2:          00:26:12       Lately I've been falling Dexter's, uh, ex wife or I guess wife. No, spoiler alert. But you know, the main girl from Dexter on twitter. It is so weird to follow somebody that you know was supposed to be dead or something or that's supposed to be like, oh my God, it's going to be following our dexter is going to get pissed. You know what he did to the neighbor, you know, but you know about that dude that Donnie was dexter that dude up in British Columbia. Really? But wait, wait, I haven't heard this giant crazy dexter fan and winded up committing a murder and getting caught for it. I do feel like after watching that show so much that I find myself doing things like, you know, like, uh, uh, like I'm always thinking twice, like, what would my dad do? You know? I'm like, wait a second, I'm not, I'm just getting the mail you episodes on a fucking lie.

Speaker 2:          00:27:01       One shot stone. That's psychologically, that's a dark show. Well, it's kind of Kinda weird. Good though, Huh? The first season and now I can talk about it. Uh, I thought that John Lift goes season was the best season. Okay. Maybe it was. I mean, when I said it was only based on the very first episode that I saw, granted I was getting a little tired of the whole. Every week somebody gets murdered, thing for whatever is a formula to it that if you get caught with 20 minutes late, 20 minutes left in the show, who's going to kill? Well, you know, I tell you what, that whole, the smiths, third season, whatever his name is, Jimmy Smith or whatever his name is, Don thought that was the worst season. I hated that. So yeah, I did not like that season in mind. It wasn't the best. The best season was the first one.

Speaker 2:          00:27:43       The first one was, first of all, the first one was a motherfucker because I understand the guy got sick and you know, and he had some health problems, but the first one he looked like a killer. Like he was built. I didn't buy him when he lost all that muscle. I mean, I know it sounds silly, but I just, I'm like your Jujitsu and people and you look like a skinny athletic. I never even thought he had muscle to begin with. If you look at the first one, you know what it looks like to me, like there's dudes that you go to Jujitsu with and you see him and they're like purple belts or something like that, and you look at me like this fucking guy is going to be a pain in the ass. It's going to be hard to roll with this. It's got like a big neck, strong shoulders.

Speaker 2:          00:28:18       I'm like, this is going to be a battle. You just look at them. That's kind of what he looked like in the first season. It looked like a dude who's like a sturdy dude, you know? I bought that. He was like this killer that he made him look just a little more sinister. Even though he was polite. He looked so much like a victim yet, but maybe that's why they picked Jonathan Lithgo because they're like, oh, he could be him. Here's my problem and this is. I mean, granted, I'm a commentator for fucking cage fighting, but when John Lithgo caught her in that weak ass rear naked choke, I was like, you ain't cook put. Nobody's hit that bitch. You knew. It's so funny and in the fucking chick with a bronc people bought, they don't just lay there and accept the fact you're choking him. I try not.

Speaker 2:          00:28:54       Let me tell you something. My daughter who she's just fucking to. Okay, she's 30 pounds. She had something stuck in her nose last night. All right, and it was a. She shed a little Barbie doll shoe and she fucking shove it up her nose and it was like upper nose and she was pulling at it and I had a hold her down and get it out of her nose and do. She's fucking 30 pounds and she's screaming and freaking and kick in and I can barely get a hold of her nose and hold her little tiny head to pull this thing out there. John with NGOs. Got some woman, a grown ass woman who knows some crazy man's about to fuck her dead body and she's just going to go, oh my God, you're putting me to sleep. Shut the fuck up, right? Take that crap. The actor have grabbed the act and just hold them down. Just start smacking him in the face. Get up, get up, get up, have them fucking freak out

Speaker 1:          00:29:42       thinking you're gonna. Die Like you. You might die in this. I might not ever let you up you. Fuck, I might just beat the fuck out of you to death right here. And there's nothing you can do about it. But that's how you feel when someone is choking you to death in a bathtub. You don't just always got me. That was stupid. You know what though is like, it's so funny because while I'm watching it doing John Lithgo doing these moves and stuff, I'm like thinking of you watching this and they're like, ah, you know, Joseph's getting pissed right now. No, but we're so pleased that you get so mad about just the, that the choke. But I can't buy that fucking cell phone. It looks like it was made in paintbrush, you know, like incoming call. Where are you at when you look at the graphics?

Speaker 1:          00:30:20       You know, there's no fried. Makes that crap. So tech cell tech is not a real phone company. That's hilarious. I just, you know, to me that that scene where he kills a woman, the tub is just as unrealistic as spock grabbing people by the neck and putting them asleep. That's just just like a Ninja deft touch to me. People freaked the fuck out when you're choking them. Okay. They hyperventilate. They kick, they spazz. That's a, that's made by someone who's never seen anybody get choked and the guy was doing it to never choked anybody and there was no girls. Never been a show that nobody should have been freaking the fuck out. You don't just choke someone like that. They go crazy, right? I try to survive. You're gonna fucking bathtub with a naked old dude is behind you and you just kinda just. You would bite that motherfucker.

Speaker 1:          00:31:08       You'd be fighting for your life. At that point. I would be more believable that he would move his blood samples out of the air conditioning unit. After the first, second, third, or fourth time, the. I'm thinking more of Shit like that. I'm like, come on, you take your fucking blood samples that you put underneath the toilet or something like that. Little thing that evidence the little thing that he, you know, the trophies didn't need that, but I guess that's a thing that serial killers do though, right? Yeah, I agree. But you know, I look at a show like that, but then your last week Eddie said that he liked trueblood and and I just get so angry. I've been fighting people off twitter all week about true blood lovers. Another goddamn vampire show. How many vampire shows are there now? There's a new one. There's a new one.

Speaker 1:          00:31:47       Nigga. What the fuck? What happened to the black shirt with the fucking thing? What happened to the thing that they hypnotize you with that just fuck all evolved. That it. No Gate and no nothing. They show up with that. Robert Patterson looks like he's been getting punched in the nose. The other fucking kid and the chicken. I don't know. Even play the vampire. Fucking go there. I don't go halfway there. My wife watches true. What? I leave the fucking house. You understand me on Sunday nights? I don't like that shit. I don't know where it came from. It just snuck up on us, like fucking brings you out of a swarm of vampire show. No show. Everybody's got a show about the and I don't listen, but I don't know. There's. What's that other popular show with kids right now? There's another vampire show, vampire diaries, her diaries.

Speaker 1:          00:32:33       That one. What the fuck? Then there's another one that's just about to start. That's brand new. That's coming out soon. Can you have too many fucking vet? Will there be a bounce back? Can we expect? I don't know because there's people in the chat room. They're saying, dude, true blood is legit. You know, they just don't get what I'm talking about. Just the fact that there's a chat room of people talking about right there that destroys my life is too God damn easy. People are soft as fuck. They are soft. Some are people are fucking soft and they're not even interesting. Fucking vampires. That's safety. They have no character. Well, they don't have anybody. They live off La Luis, the twilight ones. He lives off animals and he can go outside in the daytime. What? You knew, what they've done. They've pretty much taken this soap opera, a dying thing.

Speaker 1:          00:33:23       They've taken off the evil guy with the patch, made him a vampire and that's what the shows you guys are watching his fucking soap operas with Vampires. So guys, I'm not gonna lie to you. What? I bought the fucking movie with Wesley Snipes. Spade a spade a spade. Limited speed. Wasn't a name for a black guy. Wouldn't be nearly as where he met with the Chinese people. I bought that shit. I was like those Chinese. Oh, a huge bleed. I was a big blow. I love as a kid, but that's it. That's where it ends. I don't want to see all this new shit. Guys were arrested in hand. True blood that a vampire. That's bullshit. I don't like. That shit scares me. I don't fuck me. I was a kid. Yeah.

Speaker 4:          00:34:05       Glade was my. One of my favorite comic book characters. That was a bad. It was black and he used to have little knives made out of teak wood. He would kill people with teeth because they were all vampires would kill them with wood. So we had wood knives made out of is really hard.

Speaker 1:          00:34:20       I love that. Everything else I got to tell you guys, I don't even go and fucking put this shit on. They change so much about the whole vampire lore. I mean the whole thing. What the fuck happened to Transylvanian out Seattle now? But I want to see where the fuck the APP for the iphone is. The fucking Transylvania. When I was a kid, you want to see a vampire? We to go to transport rating. Now they don't even talk about fucking Transylvania just disappeared. Go look it up. Fucking Transylvania. What the fuck is it's people like they had an accent and shit like that where they'll from Bulgaria. All of a sudden now they're fucking Spanish. So if I was a smart man, everyone should like bet money. What the next monster is going to be. You know, it's like it's not going to be vampires. What's the next thing? And Big Foot's going to come back and make a comeback or. So there's another

Speaker 4:          00:35:04       vampire thing by Google Eramo del Toro. I don't know how to say his name, how you say his name is Guillermo del Toro. He wrote a book called the strain and I saw, I read the book. It wasn't that good. It started off really good. It started off like, wow, this is a crazy ass vampire movie. Like this is like really suspenseful. But then towards the end it was almost like he was just trying to finish it. It's like, you know, and then the guy jumps out of the car, the guy killed him. It was like, it was really bad. The end towards the end, like it's almost like he was trying to jam a six series book or a two or three series book rather into one book. So

Speaker 2:          00:35:38       it, it dies, but they're, they're going to do something with that. They're going to make that some sort of a big event, but at least he's a murderous evil fucking vampire. And He. And then he runs, you know, like takes over New York City. It's pretty crazy shit, but it just ends bad and maybe if they can fix the ending, but the in the writing in the script and it maybe it was creatively directed and they did a good job with it, but the writing was just. It was kind of clumsy at the end, but what? What? What is it about people that are fucking obsessed with vampires and all the animal, all monsters, all the things to be worried about in the world. Why would it be vampire? It's none of the obsessed. It's the hot thing right now. In two years, this vampire then will be gone.

Speaker 2:          00:36:17       Twilight. Those two fucking half of fags will be dead somewhere. I'm telling you, I think it's going to keep going. You know why I think it's going to keep going. Sex in the city. I didn't understand sex and the city. I couldn't believe that. I mean, I watched it a couple times. I'm like, yeah, it's kind of a cool show, but it's not just that people like it, but they go fucking crazy for it. Grills, they respond to it like it. It resonates in them in a way that a guy can understand, you know, took out like Uri, you watching. Oh, that's funny. Show. But to them it's like a movement. It's like something that validates them. Like this fucking movie. The, the last one, when they went to Dubai, I saw more people get fired up about going to city. No, you sought though, right?

Speaker 2:          00:36:58       We talked about. That was a terrible bad. It wasn't bad. The first one on cable when the second one came, I was in the hotel room. You know, it wasn't back. I think with that is when we talked about it for two hours. That's the kind of resonating to entertainment for women. Okay. That twilight is for like young girls and young girls. Young girls were in their thirties or forties or there's a romantic aspect to the vampires that, you know, there's something in the writing. Know how we can do it. We can. We can kill vampires today guys. We make a movie about vampires that cheat guys. Empires are cheaters. That'll be an asshole. I don't. I never watch TV and they suck. What is, what is the suck blood? What the whole thing of of twilight. I don't say this, there's a family of vampires and they try not to eat people because they're nice, but why are the women in love with them is because they're super.

Speaker 2:          00:37:54       He's super romantic. Like the read the book is all about him being. He's really romantic. You know? He's this guy that lived hundreds of years ago. Meanwhile he's a fucking Pedo is banging some high school chick. How the whole thing is kind of creepy when you think about it. I mean the guy's fucking 300 years old and he's hanging out with some 17 year old trick. What the fuck do you have to say to a chick was 17 when you're 300 chicken. That movie. What I'm saying? I think that the biggest problem that does movies, it's the chick though. She chose somebody that's dead instead of somebody that just turns into a dog once in a while, but he's alive. Can you imagine that chick was trying to talk to you about some stupid new song that was out like, oh my God, I love this song. He'd be like, bitch, I was around when they didn't have cars.

Speaker 2:          00:38:35       Do you understand that? There was no photographs when I was born. How the fuck yeah, we used, we used to find a way across oceans by staring at the stars. What do you want to talk to me about? You stupid. Fuck. He would just kill her in either. He wouldn't be able to take that bullshit. Three hundred year old man talking to a 17 year old girl. Can. You're 44 years old. Can you talk to a 17 year old fuck. You could talk to her like she's a nice kid. Like, so what do you want to do when you get out of college? So what are you thinking about? That sounds cool. Oh Wow. That's a child. This guys banging her. This is a stupid ass fucking movie. It's the premise is absolutely completely ridiculous. It would've been way better if it was a grown woman like in her twenties or thirties or something.

Speaker 2:          00:39:17       Gets divorced, branches out our own meats, a vampire falls in love that would work. Just fucking high school check. He's going to high school and he's banging a 17 year old and no one thinks that's crazy about the fact that he's evil. He's interested in her. She's fascinating to him. It's a fucking baby. It's a baby. Imagine how young 17 year old girl is to you. Your 44. What the fuck would it be if you were 300? You know, I mean look like if I was 300 that motherfucking could speak Latin and he's talking to the interviewer 300 years old, you'd be fucking black chicks by then. You know, you'd be done with the white race out there. You'd be like, you're getting the darkest black. And does that happen with so many older Italian guys? Oh, like Deniro type guys.

Speaker 2:          00:40:06       Bill Maher's all black too. They just go fuck like bitches. I'm tired of it. I'm tired of it. You don't want to get freaky. Want to complain? You don't want to shake that ass down for the party. Get the fuck out. Go, go. I'm done. I'm done. Alan fix all black too. I heard Alan Thick. Alan thicke is a cool motherfucker. Gets up on the side. We had Alan thicke on. Um, we had them on fear factor. He did celebrity addition. That dude is funny as fuck. Smooth Professional. Always got a smile on his face. One liners just coming left and right. Totally. Naturally I was getting delirious. Hilarie will just say I was kidding about the Alan thicke thing. Oh, you didn't make up something about this chick that went around the world. The red filming. Oh, that poor little quit letting these stupid young chicks get it on rats just cause they want to break records.

Speaker 2:          00:40:55       There has to be laws against sabre. They put it back on the boat and yeah, it's fucking retarded. That's what, that's what Farmville is for chick. Well, you know what, man, it's irresponsible over parents, man. It just flat out is. There's no way you can have your shit totally together at 16 years of age. There's no way you should be allowed. Not just out there living in an apartment by yourself or staying at a hotel room by yourself unsupervised. No. You know, you, you might be a little bit naive about the way the world works. You might not have ever been fucked over. Might not truly understand like how deceptive people can be. You shouldn't even let your 16 year old be by herself in a big city. You're going to let her out in the ocean. You crazy. Fuck.

Speaker 1:          00:41:34       You're going to let her get on a boat now with this start. It started raining. Apparently like a really good boater. Oh, where? What location? I don't know it just counting county. Where's she going now? But I just want to know where it started and where. Find. I was just looking at pictures of her. I just want to know where it started. Where it there? What's it say? What's the story? Brian? Sixteen year old girl. Sixteen year old girl. Lost. See?

Speaker 5:          00:41:59       See two words. Two holes.

Speaker 1:          00:42:05       First one that hit. Click on images and send. Let me know if there's a butthole. Okay, hold on. By the way, have you seen that Miley Cyrus? We were talking about it. This is high level Internet Geek Shit that Brian is throwing at you. Brian. Probably does this with every story in the news and I just want to see searches to get tickets. The first buckle is someone will put up a goat c and attach it somehow with tags and it will be on Google images and he'll hack his way though the first position. I absolutely know that will my girl Miley Cyrus Felton was showing my miley Cyrus's Jj on his website. There's a picture of it. Someone took a picture of it, I don't know. Miley Cyrus was getting out of a car and there was like a, like a Britney Spears crotch shot and a president put it on his website.

Speaker 1:          00:42:50       He twittered it. And then like a couple hours later, the picture that was taken down from twit pic or whatever you put it up. Now the picture is fucking Vagina, Maria, whatever her name is miley Cyrus's vagina. And people are saying, you know, that's child porn, just 17 and stuff like that. So then there was this whole movement showing that the other pictures from that day, uh, like, you know, minutes or seconds before and it shows her having underwear on now a [inaudible] went on his website saying today, hey, that's not a real picture, blah, blah blah. It's been photo shopped, blah, blah blah. Right, right. So, but then you go to, what would tyler durden do? WWT D, D dot Com. And there's pictures of her from the same shoot where it doesn't show the underwear. Like, like you can't see the underwear anymore. So you think the underwear was supposed to sell it.

Speaker 1:          00:43:36       Now it's doing that whole shit. When Britney Spears at people did this too. They're fucking putting fake throws out to cover up fake or real photos or snopes or something grabs it. It looks at it and go, oh, that's not really her vagina. It's probably love to do the opposite. It's presence people probably to. Well they should be. He's pretty web savvy. Ryan. Him, he owns a giant website. Even if you put up a photo of a fake vagina on a 17 year old, I believe it's illegal. Absolutely. It's illegal more. That's why I'm on the board. The mods have pulled pictures down many times where it was a girls that even just looked like they were under 18, you know, because you don't want to get caught with that kind of shit. Man. That's some serious, serious, serious shit. Even just like a fake picture of a young girl's pussy can get you locked up. You can read a lot of problems. President's a fucking retard. When he used to make fun of Adam Sandler's kid and doing all that bullshit, that's just, you know, he just needs to be shut up. Would benefit

Speaker 2:          00:44:32       from three years in jail. I think that's why that do beat him up or the black eyed peas, whatever. That's embarrassing and listening to them afterwards was so ridiculous. When you sit on the couch, got violence is never the answer. Oh my God, yes. It is the fuck beat out of you. You want to. You want to fuck with people. People are going to hit you in the head. Stupid. The only thing that protects you from that as the law. All right, that's it. Human beings want us. They want to pass that. They want to just find a way around that. They want to cause you pain. You know why? Because you're putting out a lot of negative energy. You know what? I want to see Jonathan Lithgo and pres in a bathtub. Him choking him out from behind. So I say that. Do you think that he would struggle?

Speaker 2:          00:45:07       No, I think even just let it go. Let it happen. Do you think his butt hole would open up like a flower fleshlight and just lock a hold of with cow's body and pull them into his asshole garbage disposal as bottles get fucking sharp teeth and shit. Hilton Bro. He is so fucking disgusting. As a human being, I get that whole. His whole site is set up to be mean to people and some of it's funny. I think some of what he says is funny, but I mean I think he could. I mean, I think we could all benefit from a little less negativity in the world. Let me say the negativity shit. I buy the same dementia doesn't make me laugh. You know, when Shit's on people's kids being ugly or you know, call certain women, ugly, you know, you don't like the way they look.

Speaker 2:          00:45:48       Who gives a fuck you. Unless you're saying something really funny, you know, you shouldn't, shouldn't shit on him. Like that shit on things. They can't control what they're fucking kids look like. Like really? That's just negative, you know, it's not. And the people that enjoy that are cons. They're the people that don't feel bad when someone shitting on someone's kids like, whoa, really know because they're ugly man. What was he saying about his kid is the same as ugly and Blah Blah, blah, and they can find a pallet. She looked like a kid, not, not Adam Sandler. I think his kid, he's probably had a lot of people fuck with him in his life and he's probably got a lot of pent up hostility if I guess we'll wait to fucking rappers who don't get. That's what happened. The willingham thing. They were so lucky that that was outside.

Speaker 2:          00:46:31       Yeah, but we'll, you know what I'm saying? It was another one. It's because you know what? He will, will I am said, you know, I'm a fucking artist, like respect me. I'm an artist. And he goes, you're not a fucking artist. You're a fucking faggot. And someone went, oh, no, fucking hand came out of nowhere. He clips him. I mean, the dude barely got hit. Okay? It was a scratch, a tiny little square vial. It was nothing. And he's screaming. The next day mean it was like another version of leave Brittany alone. It was so ridiculous. It was like, Dang. I wonder if he was thinking like, Oh my God, I'm idea this Brittany thing was he believed in at one point in their life needs to get their ass kicked. You know, I'd get my ass kicked all the time and Jujitsu and I think that is very good for you.

Speaker 2:          00:47:20       It's very humbling to get your ass kicked and when dudes have never experienced the frustration and anger, have another dude on them taken out in the physical. If you never experienced that, you're going to talk a lot of stupid shit. You know you're going to get mean to people for no reason. You're not going to be civil when you can be. You have the option to be a nice person and you're choosing not to be and you're making it a pain in the ass for all the rest of us and someone's going to punch you in your fucking head. Right? And if no one's around, you're fucked. Okay. If no one's around and they find you and you've been mean to people for no fucking reason, talk shit on someone's kid, they might kick you in the Dick or they're going to cover their whole kitchen with plastic and when he's going inside the kitchen, he's going to come up from behind him with a syringe and the neck and he's going to wake up, covered up and part of that movement where they say shit to you when you smack them laid down nine one, one.

Speaker 2:          00:48:11       That's one thing in it though. See, there's a living in it. People enjoy it. They enjoy being shit and that's. That's what the problem is. The problem is that, and I'm as guilty of it as anyone, I'm not. I'm not saying that I'm above this in any way, shape or form because I'm definitely not. I'll go to those sites. I'll go to, I'll pick up US weekly if I'm taking a shit. I've seen US weekly. I'm like, all right, who's up? Who's doing something mean? Who's who's an asshole? Who's getting sued? You know, I draw, come coming out of your mouth all the time. Oh, how rude. But you know what I'm saying? I mean, it's just, there's a, there's a part of us that likes, likes getting upset at people. There's a part of us that life's going to be how you fucking loser posted before there's a guy on twitter you posted before that I was going to come up.

Speaker 2:          00:48:54       Everybody put some nice stuff on that. One. Guys said, fuck you. Tbi. You know, of course. But what kills me is if you're going to be a tough guy, come out of the fucking live today. There's a million tough guys. Well, there's a million fucking tough guys on the Internet and when you tell them to go fuck that mother in the ass, then you'll never hear from them again. Seattle fuck around. I tell them exactly. Go light your mother's pussy on fire, whatever. Then they don't bother me. No. This stuff that I don't like, stuff, I don't really fuck with it that much. You know, I, I got into it with a kid from my hometown on facebook couple of weeks ago, a Bible breather 20 years ago. I was stuck. He was selling me, quite alludes that he's telling me that I shouldn't curse on facebook a motherfuckers.

Speaker 2:          00:49:33       I hate all that shit. You want to hear some negativity in the Internet. This is a hilarious story and this happened this weekend. I was in Vancouver for the UFC and apparently I got an elevator with some dude and the dude didn't say hi to me or nothing, but he said I gave him this look like I didn't like him or like a, you know, like back the fuck off look. And then he says that. He said take care guys. And then we said nothing and then he left the elevator like wow, Joe Rogan's a fucking hassle. So he goes online and makes us whole thread about me being in an elevator with him and no conversation taking place at all, but me being an asshole like I'm giving him this look, I think I'm a bad ass and I got short man syndrome and you know, and then fucking I got problems with communicating with people.

Speaker 2:          00:50:16       Like it was crazy shit and I'm like if I saw you, if you said something to me, anything, if you said you know, take care of, I would have definitely said you too man. I always say that I not, I could fucking hate you. And if you said take care man. Have a good day. Bye Bye. All right dude. Take it easy. I would fucking respond to you. I wouldn't just stand there stone faced. Even if I fucking hated you, I would say something. I'm not a mean person. I'm not the type of person that does shit like that. So it's either one or two things happen. Either he said it and I didn't hear it or I responded like our dude take care. And he didn't hear that either one. And the dude was high, those the other thing, so he was probably a little bit paranoid and a little bit star struck, but he makes this crazy fucking thread and then I tell him, you know, I get on, I said, Hey, I'm sorry you had a bad experience, but it was probably a misunderstanding.

Speaker 2:          00:51:02       I'm, I'm out. I'm a nice guy. If you're nice to me, if you're not retarded, you know, and you're cool to me, I'm going to be holding you back. I tried to be cool to everybody. Like it was just a misunderstanding. Well, the threat. He says, all right, cool man. Sorry. No big deal. Well, the thread keeps going on and on and on, and he keeps commenting on it, like it keeps going back to it and back to it. Like I did something to them. And then finally I come back, I go, listen man, I go, you're out of line. I go, nothing happened. You're making this thread about a conversation that didn't take place. Do you understand? We didn't even say a word to each other like, this is crazy. You're still going on about this. And then he comes back, fuck you, I'm out of line.

Speaker 2:          00:51:33       You fucking piece of shit. Wow. You fucking short man syndrome. You're like one of those Chachi's window's tight shirts. And you walk around like you're fucking crazy. Is that. And I'm why you can't back down now. You know he has like, this was not easy. Yeah. You. This is out of nowhere. I'm going to. I'm not saying anything negative. I'm saying he's out of line for other guys. Have you elevated with three other people? Me and Eddie Bauer. Fuck, is he. Anyway, I'm on the phone on the way here. I stopped. I've totally somebody. And the next thing you know, somebody comes up to me. No, excuse me. I would've never come up to somebody. But that's the little tread over here. Your Joe Broken. So you have to say something. I don't think he was that. This is what I think it was. I think he was a little high.

Speaker 2:          00:52:16       It was a little paranoid. And I think he's a little sensitive. And you know, sometimes people think that people think they're better than you and that fucking sucks. Nobody wants to be around some. If I'm around someone like an actor or someone and they get Douchey, I'll say something stupid to them, you know, if I'm around some asshole actors, one of the reason why I don't like being around actors, a lot of them play fucking games. They say stupid shit to you. They said like, I was on a set with this one guy once and we were about to do the scene and uh, I'm just being cool with them like, right. All right dude. And he's about to walk away. And he goes, so you have almost no hair. And he walks away. I go, what? What'd you say? Nothing. And just walks away like he said something to try to fuck with my head before I did the scene, like picking on my hair, falling out to so and so.

Speaker 2:          00:52:55       Then I saw him the next day and I was still in my head and so he started to try to fuck with me again and then I just, I just said something to him like, dude, don't, don't fucking get stupid with me, you know, don't, don't like play little insult games. Me, I go, you and I will never have a real conversation ever again. Right. You know why? Because you're a fucking idiot. I was nice to you and you came with this. You, you know, it wasn't like a joke. It was like he said something like a little slightly insulting thing and then walked away. I mean, you could say that like, dude, your hair's falling out. I'm like, fuck you, you ugly bitch. You gotta mirror and there will be joking with each other and we can be friends. But when I know that someone's trying to fuck with me, like why are you doing that?

Speaker 2:          00:53:29       This isn't funny. Like you're trying to be shitty with me. That happens with actors all the time. With actors, you're always dealing with little psychological bullshit. They're all fucking tweaked out and freaked out because they don't create anything. They have to have someone come to them with scripts and ideas and pick them and choose them. It's like the only art form where somebody has to pick you so you can perform, you know? I mean, if you're a fucking musician, you, you do your goddamn music, you make your own shit. Your comic, you write your own jokes. If you're an actor, you have to sit around and wait for someone to give you a role, you know? I mean, you could. I guess you could put together your own shit and throw it up on youtube if you want to get crazy. I had, I ran into something that goes along this whole line at the same a couple of days ago.

Speaker 2:          00:54:08       This guy I know wrote something to a friend of mine that was so fucked up like, and so I took a screenshot of it. He wrote, you're a dirty fucking whore. Your tits look like shit. Obviously you're desperate for attention. Get a light. Three minutes later he wrote, you are so desperate for attention. Your tits. You Post. Look like Shit, you're a funny girl who is lonely, so this guy, I'm like, who the fuck is this guy? And I'm like going. Somehow he has connections with opie and Anthony, not really sure how yet, but then I go through it and he has this fucking envelope where has this full address and so dexter style, I googled his address, fucking took a picture of his house and on another twitter account, send it to them and goes, that's a very rude thing to say. Now he deleted all those photos, a post and stuff like that.

Speaker 2:          00:54:55       His latest tweets I've been, I feel really sick. I've never been this sick in my life. Instead you them the fuck out. It's so crazy because he has like his pictures and his whole twitter is a real twitter and he's a family guy. His daughter, he's a sign nothing. How do you do this when you have a daughter too? So I'm really interested in finding out what his connection to the open anthony show. It's because he has all these shots from like in the studio with Jim Norton, blah, Blah Blah. Oh yeah. You can find out you got pictures of him and everything. Oh yeah. I'm looking at it right now. Okay. Well tell us what Jimmy will tell us. Yeah. Wow. Crazy people. So this guy I got on afterwards and he goes back and forth and starts bringing up a video of me being an asshole to some guy from like nine years ago as proof that I'm a Douche bag.

Speaker 2:          00:55:37       I'm like, you're trying to distract from our conversation. Like we didn't have a conversation, right? There was nothing. Nothing took place and you've made this whole thread about it. Now you're screaming and swearing at me and insulting me like this is craziness. Do you understand this? And so he actually came on and apologized and then I came on and so it's all good, you know, no harm done. It's just. I think it sucks when the thread by this time everyone's piling on. Everyone is like, you insecure a piece of shit. Like what the fuck is wrong with you? Like what are you crazy? Like? So many people are saying the guy's crazy. And a few people say, oh, I met Joe Rogan introduce bag. Some of them are like making up stories. I just told us to sign my autograph, which is just crazy horse shit. So anyway, the dude he apologizes and I say it's all good, you know, I think that we all learn from a being criticized.

Speaker 4:          00:56:24       It doesn't feel good to say people need to hear people say you suck at and to hear people, you know, call you piece of shit and criticize you. But it's good because when you realize that you're having a negative effect on people, it makes you think like, what is this a fact that I'm not seeing. I'm thinking I'm doing the right thing. I'm thinking I'm living my life. What am I doing that's making people so upset with me? Like, what is, is it real now? What is it? Is it, is there is a jealousy issue, is a, as an Alpha male issue, is it a, am I being too insensitive? Like what is it? I think it sucks to admit that we all have like little, little issues, but being criticized like especially online, I think it accelerates your social development because it makes you a little bit more aware of what a bunch of anonymous people really, truly feel about what you say.

Speaker 4:          00:57:07       No, you don't get that too much in real life, in real life. You know? There's a lot of people that especially like until the internet came around, they were there know they could bullshit their way through. You know, you could bullshit your way and charm. People be can't fucking charm anonymous douche bags on the internet, anonymous Douche bags and the Internet will go, fuck you. You fucking hack. You suck. You know you're nothing. You're a loser. You're going to die like that. Like they'll go after you, man. They'll go after you, but you develop two things. You want to develop a thick skin from that were like, it doesn't hurt anymore. Now it just feels weird. It's like, what's this guy doing? It doesn't make you do something like that. I hate you guys. Got To be something wrong with it. Elevated with God. Having a good day, guys, it didn't hit me or whatever.

Speaker 4:          00:57:50       I get off, I go home. It's like the people go to comedy clubs and write 11, saying that you would sell it though, that you wrote a joke or you said something on stage. What would make you go home and write a fucking letter about your experience at a comedy club? Or if somebody said, well, here's a lady that wrote a, ever tell you the time to. The lady wrote about my retarded Jesus joke. Remember my retirement. I had a joke about cloning because there was a. There was a group called the second coming project and the second coming project they were going to take some DNA from the shroud of Turin or some other religious artifacts and try to clone Jesus and they thought that that would be the bringing back of the Messiah. That would be the second coming would actually be through science and that they would clone Jesus.

Speaker 4:          00:58:31       And so I, I wrote this joke about, well cloning is not been perfected yet. Like Dolly the sheep shed all sorts of genetic issues and she died young and you know, that was considered a success. There's a lot of failures, I'm sure that we never heard about. They were like horrible genetic disasters. Fucking monsters and shit. I'm like, what if they clone Jesus? And the first one comes out retarded. I mean that's possible because that down syndrome, what do they do? They kill it. You start from scratch or. Yeah, maybe it's a test. It's a test. He's testing us instead of turning water into wine. He turned like dog shit in the cookies home thing where they were following Jesus everywhere. He was like, I want to go into the park today. They're like, don't you think we should seal the hip, you know, heal the sick or help. No, no, no. The park. So they were all waiting for him to come up with, you know, the fucking answer. Great. Manatee. Well this woman got so mad.

Speaker 2:          00:59:22       She gets so mad. She wrote this fucking shoot. This was. I thought it was really funny about it. She said not only did he tell this horrible job, but when the audience didn't respond, he insisted on talking about the same subject instead of moving on. She was upset that I wouldn't move on. Like her version of comedy is you got to do what the audience wants. Like you're not, you're not supposed to be coming from your own head. You only do what they like, you know, it's like, like you're, you're a band. They can yell out, you know, do hot for teacher. Then you have to sing up for Dj, you know, like I thought it was running and there was people that were laughing. So that's the same woman that doesn't change the radio station when they're talking about boobs on opie and Anthony, there's fucking read.

Speaker 2:          01:00:04       That's a form of retard right there. Well, it's also a person who's very self righteous because she thinks that she can get away with telling people what to say and what not to say. You don't have to like comedy, you don't have to like accommodate. So for everybody, but just either shut up or leave, you know, don't fucking get angry. Don't yell shit out of me because she was yelling at me to stop and stop. Stop. Like what? I'm talking about your fake guy. Sorry. I'm talking about a fake retarded guy that I made up. It's killing you. Remember, remember, remember when the first videos I've filmed for you was. I was sitting behind a guy and he was getting so upset. Oh yeah. Watching your show. I was filming his legs starting to Flinch. He was like fucking looking around. There was the Noah's Ark Shit, was it?

Speaker 2:          01:00:46       Yeah. Then he wrote a letter a couple of days later and we've had a bunch of letters. Where does the phrase, when you say science, where did that originally come from? Thomas Dolby. And Thomas told she blinded me with science. If you've ever seen the video. The guy was the uh, our answer to the scientist on TV in England. He's old. If you see the video, he would just yell science. That guy's a real. He's like our bill Nye the science guy video. So that's what I wanted to talk about. What we were talking about, the whole Jesus thing, I almost forgot was that giant fucking statue in in Columbia. It was at Columbus, Cincinnati, Cincinnati, this fucking 70 foot Jesus got hit by lightening, caught on fire and right across the street was the street from. It was a big billboard for the hustler store. I love. And so billboard not a scratch.

Speaker 2:          01:01:37       I love the quote. Yeah. It was like, I think it's Kinda messed up, but the hustler billboard didn't catch on fire and that's just not right. One Guy said, my favorite quote, one guy said, I didn't expect that. Expect that. I expect that. I'll thought the magic man. We've got a bit. I mean the stupidest thing about it is you're not supposed to make like idols of Jesus. Isn't that like even in the Bible you're not supposed to like make, make churches even. Doesn't that say in the Bible that he'd rather have you do it under a tree than break would or something like that make a church or something, something like that. Something like that. I don't know. I cannot quote the Bible here. Can I just have no fucking at the part you're saying I don't know a goddamn thing in it anymore. I read it when I was younger. When I lived Florida. They made us read

Speaker 4:          01:02:20       it. They didn't make us read it, but they gave it to us and they gave us an opportunity to read it. They handed out bibles in the class and I went from San Francisco to Florida in San Francisco. Super Liberal, had gay neighbors. My aunt used to go next door and smoke weed with gay neighbors and they would get naked and play the bongos together. So I was like around all these hippies and war protest type people in San Francisco. So I moved from there to like Super Religious Retard Florida. So I'm like right around retards and they're. They're handed out bibles and this one kid, he gets his Bible. I swear to God the word fucking 11. He gets his Bible. I'll never forget this. He goes to read the Bible. That's what he said to read the Bible and then he sits there all like crazy, like excited to be reading this book.

Speaker 4:          01:03:03       Like, Whoa, what that fucking kid's face and what he said. Well, it burned into my head. Definitely. Definitely lochner. I went to Catholic school. I don't remember shit from that Bible for years. I went to Catholic school and I went to a Catholic school. It's so fucked up that the people should allow anyone to push any ideology on the kids. Everybody thinks that like having your kids grow up. Religion is no big deal and you know, it's good for them. I agree to give some kids some morals and set some standards of behavior and to tell them that you know, about communicating with people that what's important is you be positive. You can do good things, be a good person, you know, and, and spread out that good energy spread out love. But to make the kid to go to any fucking super religious school, you're going to fuck their programming up so bad, you know, but no one is objective enough to see that people just want to have good kids and they want to carry on the tradition that their family has.

Speaker 4:          01:03:57       Religion as a child should start off as in a different religion and then move onto Christianity or whatever. Like I should start off as Buddhist, like just teaching to be a good person and then you get into like that that they should do is teach you the different principles of each religion and not say either one of them is the fucking answer, right? There's too many of them. You look at all the good aspects of all the different religions and say, well, where did all this come from? We don't know. We don't know where it came from. We assume it came from some wise people that got through a lot of conflict and figured out some way to live life and then they wrote it down and some of it makes a lot of sense even today. But when, when the book that you're basing everything on includes treating women as second class citizens, condoning slavery, murder a fucking angry God who punishes people by death and you're gonna burn into fucking fiery hell, come on, just shut the fuck up. Just stop it. You're talking goofy nonsense. You know you, you got to show me something. You've got to show me up fucking youtube clip. You got to show me something before I went and believe in, in this kind of goofy shit is silly. But in 2010, we still let that slide. We still say, well, you know, everyone has their own freedom of religion. Do whatever you want. But if you start saying like, stop, this is fucking completely ridiculous. You're saying your way is the only way you're saying people should die if they. You're saying

Speaker 2:          01:05:18       you know people can't be gay and get married. You're saying you're, you're imposing all your bullshit on other people. And we still accept it in 2010 except at the Church of what's happening now. That's where I'm from, church. That matters in my book. What are we going to get past this? When are we going to get past? When were you going to step up and say, no one knows. No one knows. You don't know. Don't say, you know you can't say, you know, if you say, you know you're crazy, tell me your experiences. Tell me what happened. Throw it in the pile. Let's all sort this out. You can't tell me that you know this is the way and you're the chosen people and she just shut the fuck up. Stop your all your Joseph Smith and you're fucking nutty. Scientology. Stop. Stop. It's all crazy. You're awkward and it's fucking up everything because when people pretend they have the answer, it fucks up. Everybody else had searched for the answer because there's an option to not even think. There's an option to like, fuck joining the search to figure out how to live the life the best way. Let's just fucking follow. These douche bags are doing. Did you ever. Were you ever religious when you were a kid?

Speaker 1:          01:06:18       I made my first communion. I got thrown out of there. I got thrown out of there before my confirmation. What happened? I beat up the fucking none storytelling stage. That's the true story. Tell me what happened. Tell me what happened. I was in the fourth grade, fifth grade, and my friends, I hung out with these two little twins and the one kid's mother was having a baby and he wanted to call and then we'll let them fucking call. So he's crying. You know how twins are. One starts crying, the other one started fucking crying. They're crying. I'm trying to learn my fucking abcs. And I said, just let him call. And she's like, mind your business, little quality. Pay Your Bill. How can you not let somebody call the hospital? This isn't like a corridor. Joe Rogan, I this your mother and the none wouldn't let him.

Speaker 1:          01:06:59       So I said, you know, fucking get up and go. So she'd made me in the two other guys get up and wait outside. Then she took me into the stationery closet and she beat him up first and I could hear it outside. I'm in the fourth grade now. My mom used to always say, don't let people hit you if they hit you, whatever. So she takes me to the closet and she turned her ring around and she just started hitting me, hitting fucking hit me, hit me, hit me, hit me in the face and shit, and I like a taste of blood in my lip and that's when I couldn't take it no more. I just fucking grabbed her and took her around and I didn't know nothing. I just hold it by the fucking throat and I said, I'm calling my mother. This is going to fucking stop it real quick.

Speaker 1:          01:07:38       No, but here's what's crazy. It was a disciplinary in there that walked around with a stick and he hit me in the leg and his name was Jack. He had gone to the school. He had stayed there as a teacher's assistant and he's the one that lit you on fire. Every once in awhile he would light you on fire. You know what I'm saying? What do you mean he will hit you? You know he was punching or smell hunch you. Oh yeah. And I fucking would punch you oprah on the chest and shit, and I had that in mind. But if you went home and told your mother you were kind of scared. I just couldn't, couldn't take people hitting me. I never liked that. So I grabbed her. He threatened to call. He didn't, didn't even threaten to call the cops because I had blood coming out of my mouth. So I said I'm getting to the payphone and called my mother. She's going to come here and we're going to straighten this up. But the funny thing is my mother came

Speaker 2:          01:08:16       with like 20 dudes from the bar so that we made a deal. They couldn't expel me because I didn't do nothing. I just protected myself. It was my fucking lip hanging like chocolate. Does your mother, you're mad at him? Yeah, my mother went off and then that's when we made an agreement. I'm going to stay till June. This happened in April. So for two months at a time, Jack got close to him. Remember when my mother said, I'll fucking kill you motherfucker. So for the last two months of my fourth grade, they couldn't even say nothing to him and I started revolting having other kids telling their parents. Now it's just such a joyless religion. How can you go back and see her pulling my ear or give me a punch to the back or something. I don't want to Catholic schools. I went to Catholic school from first grade.

Speaker 2:          01:08:56       I was very religious when I was a little kid. When I was a little kid, my parents got divorced when I was five. They separated and I was really lost and I was really scared. I remember thinking like, my dad's not around anymore. This is crazy. It's just me and my mom and my sister. It's like, it was very unsettling. My mom had to work all day and we had to be in different people's houses while they babysat us or grandparents, whatever. It was unsettling. And while this was all going on, I went to Catholic school and it was my first year in Catholic school, first grade, and they were so fucking mean. Dude. I don't remember shit about first grade. Okay. I don't remember anything about being six years old. You know what? I remember sister Mary Josephine at Our Lady of Chester Hova in Paterson, New Jersey.

Speaker 2:          01:09:34       I think it was patterson, Patterson or NORC. I remember that. I remember that experience. I lived there for a year. Okay. I went to that school for a year and in that year I went to school everyday terrified and everyday that was just fucking cunt. Old. Wasted up, used up life. None. That was just evil to everyone. Every day it was always yelling at you. I would cry like I missed my mother. Like the first day I cry. You might cry like a baby. Crazy man. This fucking evil cunt. And if you didn't do your work right or you didn't listen to her or anything was wrong, she'll tell you. She's going to make you sit on a nail and the closet. It was like a fucking pink floyd video. Is that just east coast religion or something like that? Because you guys just go after these scary.

Speaker 2:          01:10:23       Don't let them fuck when people don't get the fuck they're not happy. Period. End of discussion. Your whole life is no deck. How are you going to be happy? You're not going to come. You don't come at all. What does the Guy Do? He doesn't come because he his a fuck the Fox. Nolan. He can't even jerk off. What kind of a life is that? That's a horrible existence. It's not love. It's not passion. Emotion, celebration of life. Now it's all just do what I tell you. Follow my rules or you burn in Hell and let me touch a cock. There's a lot of that. I was going to go back and talk to them, but the school's governing, it's in New Jersey and I was there one time and I was like over there and just talk to them, but they will. That school was closed up.

Speaker 2:          01:10:59       It was when I got older and I started hearing stories about kids getting molested. I get fucking angry. I got angry at my mom. I said, how are you letting me go to school in a place where it people getting molested, you know, like the preset were molesting kids, but I don't. No, nobody was always close. It got covered up fast, but there was almost like this thing that they deserve it though. What the fuck are you doing being an altar boy? So it was like, don't you know, there was like this weird little like, C'mon wasn't why was, why is he being an altar boy? You know, it's like maybe when they were altar boys, like he was like almost an excuse that maybe he knew and he wanted it like fucking crazy. So weird. Because like my band, my religion was completely different.

Speaker 2:          01:11:34       It was like there was a starbucks there, there was like a band, you know, with that kind of like a party. It's totally different. Yeah. But there's a lot of good products that are like emily luther, they become a good part of the community. It's like a nice step off point where everybody gets together and promises to be nice. You know, you promise to abide by the laws and respect your friends and you have cookouts and shit and there's a lot of positivity in, in, in being, in a church. There's a lot of positive shit about any big community gathering where everybody agrees to be nice and the best way to get everybody to agree to be nice to say that's what God wants. There's a lot of fucking great things about church but not the Catholic church pro that is shut. That shit ain't good.

Speaker 2:          01:12:12       This fucking thing that's going on with the, the, the uh, the, the pope we've talked about or are they on a show? But for people that don't know, the guy who's the pope right now is been accused and there's all this evidence that points to the fact that he was shielding child molesters. The Guy, this guy who's the pope, he was protecting the church and shielding known child molesters and then putting them back in action around other kids that the guy went on to molest again. And the fact that there's people that are calling for that guy to be arrested for crimes against humanity. You know, like Christopher hitchins is called for the, for people to, to arrest him and charge him with, with pedophilia or charge him with child labor and child endangerment or whatever the fuck he did though was involved knowingly and exposed pedophiles to children with some of them moved to try to protect the business of the Catholic church to a different place.

Speaker 2:          01:13:02       Behavior. So yeah, exactly that. Nobody. No, you didn't let the church know. You didn't let nobody know that this fucking guy likes to dress up as Peter Pan. I mean, Hey, I don't mind. Let's handle the fucking problem, but don't put them in the witness relocation plan for priests and ship them up to Albany and two years from now you got another molestation. Ship them across the world to Philippines. Then they're at all. When they fall, they do something there. They shipped them to Germany. They just keep moving them around. Avid capital. It's been proven. Now if you, what does that, um, what is the fucking documentary? The documentary a one horrible one. The priests. Hold on, I'll find it in two seconds because I got it on my itunes. Did you watch it? Yeah, I watched half of it and I couldn't watch it anymore because it was just driving me crazy.

Speaker 2:          01:13:47       It was just so horrible. Deliver us from evil and this is all about a guy who was just his whole life boys. Girls just molested, molested hundreds of them and they just moved this motherfucker around. They just moved them around and protected. I'm protected the church. There's so many of them that are doing it, man. It's not like one or two. There's so many of them. It's a percentage. It's not like a small number, you know? It's fucking terrifying and a lot of it is just accepted. A lot of people just keep the fucking mouth shut. Just avoid the creepy flux, you know? And then I guess like, you know, maybe some of the kids that get sucked into like gay kids get sucked in and who knows, you know, but it's the idea behind it is ridiculous that these, these crazy assholes that don't fuck have a front row seat to God like they have.

Speaker 2:          01:14:24       They have the best connection they got. They got God's best cell phone number. Like it's fucking crazy that they don't even get a special spot in heaven, you know, and we all grew up with it. I mean, Joey can tell you, anybody who went to Catholic school, nobody went to Catholic school and had an awesome experience. I think we got a little less. That's the thing I just beat the fuck out of. Yeah. No, nobody even beat me. I think she whacked me with a ruler wants, but it wasn't bad. It was just a little slap, you know? It wasn't anything like nobody ever did what they did to you. Well, don't get me wrong. I always fucking fueled crazy lit. That's why they put me there. I'm sure. I'm sure you will. It wasn't for the beat and that they would give him. Listen for that.

Speaker 2:          01:15:01       He never, never allowed to beat a kid Po. That was terrible. You never lead with you that. That's a crazy angry human being. She wasn't a lack of love fucking bitch. Dot Eisen was a vape sister Mary ice at the. Something like that. If you had a choice between hanging out with an old nun or hanging out with an old porn star, who are you gonna hang out with, you know, pretty simple, you know, hanging out with Nina Hartley. I bet she's a nice lady. You know? I bet she has a good conversation. I bet she's cool and friendly and I better eyebrows. Look really creepy. Eye lashes but crazy fake eyelashes. That's old school. That's the old school. Look, that's a hot look back in the day, but you know what I'm saying? I mean it's, it's just an unfortunate choice to waste your whole life, you know, in a non loving, non friendship oriented sort of a situation like that based on a bunch of fucking silly, crazy old rules we need as a human being, as a human, the human beings as a race, we have to, as a race, get past where we're at right now and move into some new way of designing the way human beings behave and act and it can't be based on some nonsense.

Speaker 2:          01:16:06       It has to be based on just positive energy and success. Success as a race success, as a neighborhood success, as a group of friends, you know there's a way to live your life, there's a way to be positive and there's way to figure out a way to spread the most positive energy and the way they'd be the most honest, the way they'd be the most creative and the most friendly and the most productive and the most satisfied. There's a way to do that and it's not through religions currently. Re tweeting, you know, he's a little positive bump, right? Like I just said, man, retweets and pokes. Retweets are actually cool when someone cool retweets you. Wow. I always forget to look though at the re tweets because I use just the twitter website. I don't use it too much, you know, so I owe you have to go to like retweets, go to the twitter website, do I give up on tweet deck and all that stuff just keeps timing out and I'll type it out. But I love having all the different lines. I love having, you know, my timeline and I tried to respond to as many as possible. Some people get crazy. Dude, some people you don't respond to them to get upset and you're like, dude, I can't like 100 of these in an hour. There's no way I can keep them up. When you get to like 130

Speaker 4:          01:17:10       something thousand people and you say something funny or say something interesting, you'd throw up some new. I'll get like a hundred to 53 crazy. If it's crazy one, it might be a couple hundred. You can't respond to them all. It's impossible, you know, but the beautiful thing about twitter is even if you respond to them, it's like a real quick thing and nobody can send you these goddamn story of their lives. You know? Some guy sent me some fucking material he wanted me to assess the other day. Some guy says I'm thinking about doing standup comedy and those sort of really weirdly written letter like utility guys psycho and he wants me to review his comedy and then he just writes out his whole fucking routine. I'm like, dude, come on man. I'm not gonna. I don't have the time. I can't just sit here and review your comedy and tell you what I thought about this paragraph. It's like fucking up to page little email.

Speaker 3:          01:17:54       Do you just write back, send back that email in a tweet? That's what I've been doing lately. All these people are sending like Brian, check out this documentary, this, ignore this scientism, blah, blah blah. And I'm like, dude, write it back in 130 characters or less and I'll

Speaker 4:          01:18:07       reply. Yeah, people need to learn how to edit in real life too. I think twitter is awesome for that. Yeah, twitter's great for jokes. It teaches you to, to reply in, um, in like a short amount like, t to get your point across in the shortest amount of words possible.

Speaker 3:          01:18:22       Could you imagine being able to tell women that that's how you're supposed to talk to me? And for now on, it has to be tweaked. One hundred 30 words or less lady.

Speaker 4:          01:18:28       You know, Mrs Rogan just hit me with a story the other day. Oh, it was about chicken salad as opposed to a chicken salad and this fucking story took it. And meanwhile I'm on the way that gym, so I'm getting fired up and ready to fucking hit the bag and shit. Fuck shit up. Right? So I'm all, I'm all amped and she corners me with this chicken salad, chicken story about how well I always get the chicken salad at this place. But today I decided to try the chicken salad sandwich. So I ordered the chicken salad sandwich. But since I always get the chicken salad, they gave me chicken salad. So I got home and I was like, oh, it's chicken salad. Dammit. I wanted to try the chicken salad sandwich. And then it keeps going on.

Speaker 3:          01:19:15       Like I got it. I got to see what happened. Who's on first base over that? Man, there's a window opens. She's still a callback. Shiny, happy Jihad.

Speaker 4:          01:19:28       No fucking neighborhood. Chicks love to just talk. They love like reassuring communication. Some of them do his rash generalization of course, but some of them just like to just keep fucking talking man. They just like keep talking. Yeah.

Speaker 3:          01:19:41       I got an ice machine the other day. By the way, Joey, this is a new snack for you. I don't know if you like snow or ice. Told me about the Margarita. Everything. Yeah. You just sit there and make up on at 1:30 I dropped. No, but it's great because you have the Big Cup of ice. So that's like zero calories, right? You get sugar free syrups like root beer or grape or something like that. And it's just like the. There's like ice pops, remember this frozen pops like the bottom and it gets all mushy and you know, eyes. It's just like a whole

Speaker 2:          01:20:08       cup of that. But there's no calories in it. I restrict myself to one diet coke a week. No Diet coke. Yeah. As I'm getting older I'm like, you've got to pay. Okay. Nothing is for free. Right? And when you're eating this stuff that tastes sweet and it's not really sweet and it doesn't have any calories, what the fuck is really going on? What's going on, man? I mean you could tell me the diet coke is safe and I'm sure it is. I mean I've drinken a bunch of them. Nothing's wrong with me. You know, I used to do a joke. If you get cancer from diet coke, you're a fucking pussy.

Speaker 2:          01:20:39       Reality is. The reality is that kit check can be good for you. Yeah, but I mean it's like what? Do you want diabetes or do you want maybe a ankle cancer? I'll have a water. You. They have to have a coke. If you didn't have water, okay. If you were just forced to drink coca cola every day and then someone gave you a nice ice cold water and be like, God, this tastes so good. If water was like super precious, I know like there wasn't that much of it. So you'd go to like a fucking restaurant and buy some water and you know, for real good water it would cost you $100 a bottle, like a bottle of wine and you drink it and be like, oh, this is delicious. It's so satisfying. I don't want it to end anyway. You just take it for granted.

Speaker 2:          01:21:14       You open up a bottle but a little, a little drink it. No big deal. Water Tastes fucking awesome. All right. We just don't think it tastes awesome because we want that goofy sugar rush and then that Goofy Coca Cola sugars that we're all addicted to. Caffeine rush. I went to Baja fresh the other day. I had a chicken burrito and it's big mother fucking dichos dude. It was giant. I direct that thick and I was wired. That was wired. It was like. It was like I had a 20 ounce starbucks. Another big ass coat. The worst is have you ever had like you were really thirsty at night and you only have like a diet coke on your nightstand in Chug it and that's the worst warm. Oh yes. Sitting there all night. Caffeine. Yeah. I. You know what's good man? I got these new drinks that these dudes sent me. If you're into energy, not an energy drink, but workout drinks, just healthy, good for your drinks. A lot of Ginseng and shit in them. They're called good for you. Drinks. These guys sent me a whole case of these things. They're fucking awesome. They're like the best workout. Drink less. You have gatorade. Gatorade is good after you work out, but it's like a little too sugary.

Speaker 2:          01:22:18       I always add water. Two months. Yeah, you have to pour water in and I did that with all juices to apple juice, orange juice to citric for me. Let's mix it with some water. Anyway, these people that if you. It's good for you. Drinks good. The letter, the number for you drinks. You could find them on twitter. You can find them online. I'll go google them. It's shit. If you're into a good workout, drink and they support mma. I found out about them through Shane Corwin and I know they've sent Jason Ellis some some shit. They're good guys. They'd go get it now for a word from our sponsor. Flashlight back at the beginning. These gentlemen, fleshlight dot Tom. Masturbate. Ladies and gentlemen, and I know you do. Let's be real. Wouldn't you want to fuck something that feels better than your hand? I know I do because I know when I'm masturbating at least half of my body saying,

Speaker 4:          01:23:06       hey dude, you've got a dick in your hand and it doesn't feel as good when you. When you're thinking about that and you think about the fact you got a dick in your hand, it doesn't feel as good. So what I proposed last gentleman, as you go to fleshlight.com, you get one of these things and you fuck it. All right. You got to get past the embarrassment and I tell you from personal experience, because I knew about the shit, I'd heard about it on TV and on TV ads. I heard about it on the Internet. I heard about people talking about a little Eddie Bravo. Told me his flashlight story before. He's had a flashlight for awhile, but I was too proud to walk into a store or order one online. I will approve too proud to even admit that I masturbate. That shit's ridiculous.

Speaker 3:          01:23:37       So my dad told me about this fucking thing that he's hooked onto right now. Cut a reserve or a patrol was vera trawl. R E S v e r a t e r o l yeah.

Speaker 4:          01:23:49       Dioxin. Very potent antioxidant that exists in wine and I've been taking it for years.

Speaker 3:          01:23:54       Yeah. So He's been doing like this huge. He's like crazy research guy when he gets hooked on something, it's actually, it comes from plants when it's stressed by parasites or various infections like the plants, like a release like this, like fucking chemical or whatever. So people are taking this a chemical and putting it, you know, you can go to Gnc and stuff, but then there's kinds that are mixed with other things that uh, but if you get it as pure as possible, that benefits from it or like insane. It's saying that this is all in like rats. They found that the rats have like cancer gone away from it. A lot that in person routes of cancer, like bus route and they're saying that it will block colon cancer in humans and uh, it will your life will you be 30 percent more life. You live longer and stuff like that.

Speaker 3:          01:24:45       It's also saying there a difficulty in absorption that we were talking about this before. That's what I'm saying. I've, I've heard that your body absorbs very little of most of the brands that you bought. That's a, you have to find out how pure it is. And if you look on the bottle, look to see how pure it is. You want about 200 or 2:50 to 500, it goes up to $500. But look how the pure of the actual chemical of that. So two to 5,500 milligrams. Is that what it isn't? So milligrams milligrams. So the higher the milligram, the more pure it is, the higher it's just that chemical mixed with other things. So it a mix with what are the other things that they put in with it? Oh, I like grape grape seed extract, stuff like that. Yeah, he is also an anti. Have you been taking the Brian?

Speaker 3:          01:25:30       I just started in two days, but my dad's been taking it for about a month now. And he says a couple things. He said that he feels like he is just nonstop energy from when he wakes up to something that he hasn't had in years. He also said that his hip pain, he has a bad pain. He took, stopped taking it for a week and his hip pain immediately came back. And he also said that, uh, uh, that he has stomach is always getting full faster now. So after we, it gets like second side, a dinner or something like that. Now he says he feels full after the first time your dad selling resveratrol. No, he's not a scam motherfucker.

Speaker 2:          01:26:04       He's not, but he's to somebody. He's somebody that like when he could find something to eat, like researches the fuck out of it and stuff like that. If you said that whole thing in an English accent, I probably wouldn't get online. Yeah. But anyways, there's a whole thing that I emailed you, Joe, that you should look for that it out. Have some in my, um, my, my vitamin cabinet. I don't know, I never even looked at what the dosage is though. I mean it says a blocks, colon cancer in mice and then right now that they're trying to find out that the problem is we're not mice. Yeah. Well we're mammals. We're mammals. So they're, they're looking into it and a lot of the research are finding is all positive. Interesting. I'm sure there's definitely a connection with camp, but there's a lot of shit that mammals can eat that we can't and we can't, that they can.

Speaker 2:          01:26:47       Like dogs can't even eat chocolate. Dark chocolate. They'll get fucked up. Shit's poisoned. Poisoned. Did her stomach kill them and if you give a sheep, DMT, they die. You know that sheep, there's certain types of grass that has dmt in it. She eat the grass and they just fucking fall down the little feet, just twitch in the air. It just boom. Explode their brain. If you put a snail on a listerine strip, they melt. Yeah, but listerine strips on the nature, son. That's ridiculous. Well, if you flipped, hit a monkey with a rocky dies, Huh? That's all my dad. My Dad's the one that first told me there were about splendor like seven years ago. How about all the bad shit about bad when people are just getting on splenda. He was like, send me reports about how the brain like things like sugar, and this is seven years ago he was sending me this shit. So He's pretty coke. The sucralose. One's a weird one, right? Splenda what? SPLENDA as any of those chemicals tricks the brain into thinking it's sugar, so it does the ship that it does do fight a burn off the sugar, but it's not there, so it's just. I guess it has a lot of bad negative side effects. It's pretty critical. Aspartame is a bunch of them now.

Speaker 2:          01:28:01       I don't think any of them. I think actually sugar is probably the best. The best one for you. That's why a lot of these companies though. Here's the key. You got to exercise. You can't just eat sugary shit and if you're going to have one of those things, you have to have a body that can process that sugar. You can't just be sedentary and be down in sugary drinks that will fuck your whole system and want everything in moderation. Yeah. There's nothing wrong. A little coke in moderation. The drink. Yeah. Lately I've been buying those small little mini regulatory fuck cock sucker. Why you looking at me? You know? I don't know. It'll. It'll totally because I wanted to a diet coke for awhile. Terry bought like 95 of a costco. I stuck to my points. They actually gave away fucking sodium is. Oh yeah, you've got so much water with kidding me. So now I've been, I got off of that. I just drink them when I go to a restaurant. And even then I don't because I feel that they only gave me the wrong batch of shit. Right. So I stopped, you know, because I just don't want it at all right now. Have you been following e three at all this week, Joe and seen all the

Speaker 3:          01:29:02       new shit that's coming out with Xbox, Sony and all that stuff? No, I saw the, uh, the, they made the xbox smaller, but I mean, what are they going to do? This really interesting new things. It's like they're all turning into the Nintendo wi with the motion controllers and stuff. But what's really cool is like, Sony has this one which is like it, like it looks like a microphone or a fleshlight or whatever, but in the game you're like in the game and then it turns your controller into a weapon. Kind of like, you know how cgi they have like the Ping pongs all over and stuff, so you're looking at yourself with a weapon and it's Kinda, it's Kinda trippy. So like that's the whole thing with the xbox and the ps three is that it's turning you into the controller. But I think I'm sick of all this.

Speaker 3:          01:29:37       I just want to play video games. I, you know, I'm a grown man. I don't need to be dancing around just trying to fucking cast spells on dragons and stuff for a lot of people they've lost a lot of weight. Oh yeah, yeah. For, for, for, for people, for young kids. I'm sure they're loving this shit, but you know, we fit, we fit shit. A lot of people have lost a lot of weight with that stuff and they also, Nintendo just released a new three d game. Boy that I, I don't think you have to have glasses for. Maybe you do, but I don't think you do. And they said that it's actually coming out. Wow. What about like, that's, that's crazy man. What about that Microsoft thing? There was a Microsoft thing. They're working on, that was a, it was a emotion detective thing that we're going to be able to do with martial arts game.

Speaker 3:          01:30:16       Yeah, that's it. That's one of the things. That's what I believe it's called a, I forget what it's called now. Vizio or something. I can't remember. But uh, so that's, that's my xbox version, you know, I think they both, they have both a positive so I'm going to get it. They're cheap. They're $49 for the ps three and something I think we're ever going to get to reality helmets, you know, like alternate reality helmets. Remember when they had those, when they were trying to do that for awhile though. The virtual reality there were there, there was like a big thing like that. Someday we're going to be able to put a helmet on and you'll know if it's going to be like that. I was, when I was in Vegas, I was talking to all these, uh, there was a tech conference going on there and this guy I know from San Francisco owns this whole company and he was telling me about what was big in the tech shows and he says, you know, the big thing that's going to be next, he's like, porn is kind of at a dead right now with no dvds, fucking porn.

Speaker 3:          01:31:06       So red porn. He says, he says some of the technologies coming out, Yo. He's like, he's like, you know, that's going to be big where you can just lay in bed with no pants on and you feel like the legs are wrapping around you, you know, and you're fucking sitting there with their flashlight on and you're immersed into it like a helmet. He's like, that's what's going to be big. He said the TVS weren't even that impressive. He said, what was impressive this year at this convention was the digital projection, three Ds. He says, that was just amazing. That's like some help me. It will be one time shit. Kind of. Yeah. Imagine having this whole wall behind you be three d, You know, you're just fucking sitting there in this chair over here and you feel like you are in Lord of the rings or whatever. Yeah, you got to flinch and next thing is going to be way more immersive. Every step is coming to watch. The TV is going to be your wall and it's probably gonna. Be Greedy when it moves past the flat plane, that's when it's going to get really crazy. When somehow know that they figured out a way to bring you more into the action. Some some invention that allows you to be

Speaker 2:          01:32:00       like a virtual reality type situation when you watch movies. So the guy said at that convention they had a 40 inch tv that didn't require glasses. He said it kind of sucked, but he said he saw just looking at it how eventually that is going to be huge and it's going to be three d, so it's going to add a depth. So you walk into your room, you could have a picture on the wall, this long hallway, and you're gonna. Feel like that's a long hallway in your room. You know what I mean? There was a thing I went to at the planetarium the other day was one of those science shows where you lie on your back and they take on a tour of the all the different astrological configurations in the sky and constellations and stuff and so they were. They were taking you on this tour and all this different shit and space and everything.

Speaker 2:          01:32:36       I was like, how intense is this? Like the whole ceiling is a fucking screen and you're lying back. Like almost like a lazy boy chair. You lay all the way back. Like I fell asleep even so I was tired when I was there. I'm an old man. I fall asleep with the movies, so I'm standing up there watching this fucking thing and I'm like, well this is so much more immersive than television. Like that's what the next step is going to be. It's going to be like, you're going to go to the movies, but the movie is going to be like a ride. You know what I'm saying? It's going to be like some space, mountain type shit. It's not going to just going to be used sitting there and everybody gets strapped into a seat and you know, you put a helmet on captain fucking chair moves and Shit and you go on a ride through the movie.

Speaker 2:          01:33:14       I think they have similar things probably already at like Disney and stuff, but not only for a couple minutes till the ride starts, you know, but the. Oh, did you ever go in the Jurassic Park ride? Jurassic Park rides a dope one. They have. That's one of those. I think that's the one I'm thinking of. It's a. it's almost all our score. No, no, no. It's not Jurassic Park. There was another one that they had and that was old school has a robocop shit. I don't know what the fuck. No, there was one I feel maybe it is dressed park where there's the one. They had a universal studios that was all three d. It was. It was all rather a virtual. You're in a chair and the chair moves in you and you go on this adventure, but it doesn't last very long. I don't remember which one it was, but it was one of those ones where you're like, wow, someday this is going to be what movies?

Speaker 2:          01:33:54       You're like, no, we need a fucking three d avatar. Need this rather a blue avatar. Vagina needed. We need to really contact them. Don't they need to kick that up a notch? That would be a big seller amongst the geeks. The new. We've got to do this, man. You got to do a get in touch with James Cameron. I'm sure he'll agree with me. You get smurfette pussy one of the two. Just don't tell them it's an Avatar. Pussy. Just he won't agree to it with the little sparkles of some little glitter on that pussy. The new, um, the new Jack asses in three d and which is kind of gross and weird about that. But you know what? Here's the thing, I have this problem where Johnny Knoxville or Bam or none of those people have been on in the news at all for like years, it seems like, you know, now in the last week on TMZ, they've been in the news like four times, you know, and I'm almost wondering if this is just all promotion for the new movie because smart guy you got beat up.

Speaker 2:          01:34:48       Isn't that what could happen? All that. But the problem is someone got arrested, someone got arrested and it's on the news, right? Here's an $80 ticket or whatever. First assault, attempted murder. She hit him in the head with a baseball bat. It was like some serious assault charges. Some 59 year old woman baseball batted. Bam. Mark Air outside his bar in Pennsylvania. How much you all that follow that shit and see what happens. I'll let that girl finally gets Ryan. So cynical, but so right. So right. So often you're right. A lot of tell you that fellow you've called a lot of fake things and I was like, 10 ain't fake. Fake, fake, fake. You get angry. Fake. Well, what's crazy is when tmz first announced it, they were like, he's in critical icu condition, you know, blah, Blah is looking bad, and then the next thing is like, oh, just talk to Johnny Knoxville.

Speaker 2:          01:35:31       He said he was like, he was a heavier. Yeah. What was, what were some of the fakes that you've called in the past? You've called it quite a few fix where you were way ahead of the curve. Well, there was one that there was like this really horrible fight and somebody had filmed it and it looked like a dude was punching the guy fight. See, I think the added sound effects to a real fight totally added sound effects to a real fight and it looked really bad because it was the same noise didn't sync over again. It was not sinked up. I blew up that video so you can see where the hit, you know that's true. But I, I recognized from years and years of watching dudes get fucked up. That was real. That guy got punted in the head when he was unconscious and his whole body move dead.

Speaker 2:          01:36:09       I mean, what? It was a real, I don't think I ever told you I found out what happened about that video was actually made for one of those shocking TV things. They had like America's funniest home videos. Like ads, like oh no, invoices and stuff. They pump it up. That's another thing. By the way, I'm gonna. Have you guys ever seen this? Like America's funniest home videos. Don't do it as much, but any of those like sending your video type shows if you really pay attention, they don't want to pay people and stuff like that for certain things. So like most of the voices are all done by the same guy. So it's like, hey honey, come over here and look at this. And then you see here the same guy, like two videos there go, oh honey, look at how you know, and then you realize it's just one dude and it ruins the whole show for you.

Speaker 2:          01:36:51       So next time you watch one lady's like video shows, listen to the voices. It's just one guy redoing all these weights. Like, oh no, look at this. And you can tell us the same guy. It's horrible. Brian's ruining childhood memories, crushing dreams, right about Carlos conduit. What the fuck. Fucking Wolf, Carlos Condit and Roy Mcdonald. What our fucking fight. Battle Royale kid is a first of all, props to Carlos condit for coming back after those first two rounds. The first few rounds he was getting beat. He was getting taken down. He, you know, he's getting clipped a little bit on his feet, but he tacked our kid quite a few times too. The kid know kid took some big shots. There are a lot of people are saying like, you can't take a punch and like you're crazy calls. Conduit rocked him on the button and he was coming forward. I mean, no one takes good shots when they're coming forward. You know when you're coming forward, that's when you can get hurt and you know, they, they had a rock 'em sock. 'Em robots fight and then Carlos condit pulled it out at the end, got them down and just start blasting them with elbows. Man hit him with some hard left. Oh God. It was his eye up. And you know what? The kid has massive class man after. It was over and I interviewed him. He was so classy, like the way he handled it, there

Speaker 4:          01:37:55       was no ego, no bullshit. The kid was like, you know, when he kicked my ass, who's the toughest guy I ever fought? You know, I was asking them, do you think the fight was stopped prematurely? He was like, no, no. He was kicking my ass, you know, the kid was just ultimate class and honesty and just the way he handled himself, you know, and he's so fucking talented and he's like one of the first cars being 20 years old. He's one of the first guys that started out training mma that started out as a wrestler or a or whatever. He started out learning the whole sport altogether as one thing. So it's pretty impressive to watch that. That kid's got a super busy, you know, you could tell. What have you heard about the first fight? That was anything, unfortunately. Yeah, they're gonna Redo it.

Speaker 4:          01:38:35       They'll definitely do it. Fence. Dana knows the fans wanted to see that fight again. That was just a mistake. You've made a mistake. It happens, man. Being a referee is very hard to avoid. Tyson Griffin. That was a good fight. That was a great asset grid. That Kid Evan Dunham is a study that is. He's fucking good. These are great fights to sweet, but standup is good. His fucking Jujitsu's good. How dare do they think of in the middle of the Goddamn POC. They knew that they shut that shit off. That's probably my manager. She's probably thinking about like calling me to tell me that you're talking about the flashlight too much.

Speaker 4:          01:39:10       That was a good. Anyway, that was a good fucking car. There was some good pricing. What's up with pat? Barry's shit. He broke. He broke his foot and he broke his hand. He broke his neck when he punched cro. Cop in the first round and then dropped them. The second punch he hit him with, he said he felt is not going to give out. And then he uh, apparently broke his foot somewhere in the fight to his foot. Swole up like an elephant foot took pictures of it online. Like he has the two feet together and one of them's like literally twice the size. It's nasty, but a great fight though. Woo. That was fun. That was a fun fight and fun. Comeback to watching cro cop turn it on at the end of Glasgow and then take us back and choke him and then Cro, cop campaign for the submission of the night.

Speaker 4:          01:39:46       That was a good article. Yeah. Tell him what do you call them? Strategy. I don't remember what he said, but it was funny. There was a for him, man. I hope that's his last fight. I really do. Because he's been talking about retiring. I hope he chooses to go out that way. It's nice to see a guy go out on a high note, you know, that was a high note. That was an awesome performance. At the end he addressed the crowd and address the Croatian fans and it's pretty cool. I gave him the microphone. Yeah, I just gave it to him. I mean it was just, it felt like I said something to him. He was so proud and so happy and he could feel and I was happy for the guy and the crowd was going nuts and everybody was happy and I said I looked down, I saw was Croatian flags and I remember him talking about how many Croatian fans are going to be here in Vancouver because a lot of Croatian people lived there and I said, do you have anything to say to your a Croatian fans out there?

Speaker 4:          01:40:29       See, you got a lot of support and the crowd goes nuts. All the correlations go fucking ape shit. And then I just knew I was going to give him the mic and he knew I was going to give him the mic. I didn't say anything to him. He didn't say anything to me. I just, I just handed him the mic and he took it and he started walking and pacing and talking in his native language and the crowd went nuts. It was just a beautiful ending. You know, if he, if he decides that he doesn't want to compete anymore, I mean, who knows? He might decide. He might be saying that now because it was a lot of stress, but they'll get up and get back in there again because it was one of his best performances in a long time. He looked real good, especially in that third round. You know when he, when he had barry backed up and he was nailing and with punches. He was, he was looking sharp dude. He was nailing them. What's the fucking hands, you know? So who knows, man. He might decide. He might decide to keep it light and heartbreak. My doubt broke my fucking heart, man.

Speaker 3:          01:41:11       Well, it's good, but this does seem to me. It seems like it's happened. Like the last three fights. It's broken my heart. I thought I didn't know he was even going to fight again. I was like, really? I mean, because he's been getting knocked out. What the last three fights he got knocked down. Yes. I mean it's like, I think it's. Oh, got.

Speaker 4:          01:41:26       Well you got to look at it two ways. One way is the last four fights actually now he had one in there with vandelay in between and they keep charging. One actually was after the rampage last two weeks for two. Um, you, you got to look at it two ways. One, you got to look at it. The fact that the guys fighting top level talent, I mean, rampage knocked him out. He got knocked out by Rashad and he got knocked out by Shogun and he got knocked out by ace rich Franklin. So you've got to think about these are, those are four killers, you know? Yeah. It's, it's unfortunate. Yeah. It's, it's very hard to watch him lose like that. Especially when you grew up like, you know, basically I came up in the UFC, watched that guy fight. One of the first, the first fight that he ever had in 1998.

Speaker 4:          01:42:03       I was there live. I saw him fighting. I think he fought. I think the dude's name was Louis Hernandez know Econ Zalas knowing, knowing your man is no Hernandez. Those, the comedian Louis Gonzalez is the comedian. So it's known as the fighter. Right? The Guy, the guy had really said that too. I always go, what? He fought a boxer, a real good boxer, and it was a good fucking fight and I'd seen a bunch of chuck's fights. I saw the fight that he had. I wasn't there live of course, but I saw the fight that he had in Brazil against Palae in Valley Tudo. This is back when Paleo was in its prime. Paleo was one of the baddest motherfucking Muay Thai guys to ever come out of Brazil and he's one of the guys that helped train Anderson Silva and he was the best shoot box guy knocked out Matt Hughes when he knocked out a lot of dudes.

Speaker 4:          01:42:43       He was a killer. So anyway, Palae his fight and chocolate, Dell, any fucking head kick? Some ba boom. I mean with a shot that would kill a normal man. Chuckles down, gets right back up. He had kicked him twice. Now. Fight and dropped them in the end. The fight. Chuck's on top of them beat the fucking shit out of him. Bare knuckle into the netting on the bottom of the rope. The bottom of the rope has a net. Okay, so that you can't slide out. So you've got to get stuck in there, take your beating. So Chuck's on top of them just fucking punched him in the face. I mean, it was a bare knuckle old school. No rules war. I mean this is the kind of fight to that guy was involved in. He wasn't just involved in the UFC five rounds, you know, for the championship title, five minute rounds, Nevada state athletic commission to presides over it.

Speaker 4:          01:43:24       No, no, no, no, no, no, no. In Brazil, in the jungle. Okay. You know what I'm talking about. He's frightened that no one in the audience has shoes on. Okay. Either fucking screaming and yelling. Those IBC value to those. Those were savage fights, man. There was always like browse would break out. Henzel Gracie got stabbed in one of those. Okay. He's frightened that would tatio I think that's the guy's named Eugenio tatio who's an old school Luta leave ray guy. And so of course, you know, old school, Brazilian Jujitsu, Gracie family guy, and they're fucking battling out and the lights go out. Okay. Somebody kills the fucking power, you know? And there's a lot of speculation. Who did it? Maybe they thought that someone was getting their ass kicked. Who knows? There's a fucking crazy mats. Couple goes on. Henzle gets stabbed. Okay. Fucking people are stabbing people in the audience.

Speaker 4:          01:44:08       I mean, these are the kinds of fights that that chocolate Dell went through. I mean, he did it all. He fought in the early days. He, he found the first time in the UFC was wearing shoes. He was wearing wrestling shoes, kicking dudes. You know, there was very few rules, you know, things were totally different back then and that has been through so much. He's been through it all, you know, it's just the last few guys that he fought, he's a step below, you know, always a step behind where he used to be. If he was fighting lower level competition, like say if they put chuck against, say some of the guys that fight at two, oh five. When the ultimate fighter or some guys that are like lower level guys don't have the kind of standup up the ass, he'll be fucking a lot of dudes up. Do you think though that brain, his brain just wants to go to sleep though I it knows that like, hey, I know when a knockout is now I, you know, I mean he's lost his chin.

Speaker 4:          01:44:51       That is what everybody says and that is what happens with fighters. That is what happened with that. There's no getting away from that at a certain point in time made it happens. Joe. He knows that it happens with football players once they got hooked on it. Yeah. When, when guys start getting knocked out, it's just when you've taken a certain amount of concussions, sidewalk bathrooms, you got hit on the side and he went out and we'll talk afterwards because nobody's, you're not miked up. But um, you know what? He's a, he's a legend. He's a guy who's had a gigantic career and he was one of these when he was in his prime. He's one of the scariest guys. Every one of the most exciting fighters ever. When you went to see a chocolate Delphi, you knew that someone was going to get their fucking ass kicked, you know, and it was going to be brutal.

Speaker 4:          01:45:35       You know, he was going to smash somebody, he was going to get a hold of you. He's going to kick you and punch you and smash you. Remember the first time he knocked out randy couture, it was like, oh shit. He can knock out randy. Randy had been in there with Pedro Huizar. Randy had been in there with Maury Smith. Randy had been in there with big, strong knockout, high level kickboxer heavyweights and they had knocked him out, but to get in there with chuck and Chuck blast to orbit with one punch. So like the way he could knock dudes out there was. There was very, very few human beings that could stand in front of the guy, that guy when he blasts, but like a lot of guys who have a very particular style. Once you know, once, once your reflux it start to go a little bit.

Speaker 4:          01:46:14       Once you've taken too much punishment, you don't have other ways to win. The more ways you have the wind, the more unpredictable you are, the more successful you're going to be. So I got to like GSP, he doesn't even hardly get hurt. Mean got hurt by Matt Serra, but he got clipped and he says he didn't take Sarah. He took Sarah a little bit lightly. But if you, if you're the type of guy that nobody knows what the fuck are you going to do, where they're going to shoot and go for a take down or are going to in the bang if you're cautious, but you know when to attack and went to move, you've got to be like always one step ahead. It can't just be just run in there and brawl and, and chuck was so fucking good at running there and brawl and he had such a good chin.

Speaker 4:          01:46:49       It was such a good counter puncher. Know he based his whole style on that. And because of that he was the most one of the most successful guys and one of the most exciting guys. But you know, that's not the style that allows you to keep going deep into your forties. Like Randy coture. He's got a safer style like you stands with guides, but he just wants to get a hold of your ass and went to get a hold of your ass. Pressing up against the cage, beat the fuck out. You kick your knees, no, kick your legs rather knee you in the legs, elbow you punch, you get that dirty box and going and then hopefully get your ass on the ground, beat the shit out of you down there and then choke you. You know what I mean? That's how randy's rocking it these days, especially in the coalmine fight.

Speaker 4:          01:47:24       Oh, that's in the coalmine fight. You get to see him, um, you know, in the coalmine fight, like he had a totally different strategy. Beat Coleman standing up and then took home and down choked him. You know, he's, he's diversifying, adding more shit to his game. I think of chuck had done that and it's fight who had been a lot better off, but I think he hits so fucking hard and he's, you know, he's so used to blast and guys and there's so much success that it just feels good to them. And once it starts going, he just chases these motherfucker down chase's, these motherfuckers down. He wants a blast them. But Franklin condom with that really well timed right hand a current overcommitting so chuck was moving forward and he just catches him with that counter. So even though it didn't look like the hardest punch in the world, rich has a hard puncher and chuck was moving forward and so it was a hard shot. Man. It busted open his lip. Do you see what his lip looked like? It looked bad. A big, big cut. So it wasn't like. It wasn't like, you know, a shot that shouldn't have dropped him, that Shaka dropped anybody. It was a hard shot.

Speaker 2:          01:48:18       Sick two years ago we'll have dropped. I think it would have rattled him a little more maybe. I think he's gotten this in his head and says, you know what? I had to sleep apnea first. When you first have an extreme, you wake up like this, Joe. So what happens is every time you lose your breath, when I was 400 pounds, every time I chase you or walk and I lose my breath, my body was going through anxiety. That's how. That's why I had to go to the ICU. So your body would start thinking about the trauma that you've had in the past and when you, when you have sleep apnea, you wake up choking, you wake up on your feet going like this, no grasping for air. So every time I ran on the air for a long time, even on planes, there was just a connection, just the connection and yet, okay.

Speaker 2:          01:48:59       So there's that. And then on top of it, just the raw data that we know about people that take concussions, you know, you cannot take too many concussions. Oh, you don't want to. Yeah. You don't want to know that putting the finger. Like I told Eddie, Eddie goes, well, soccer. Robert came back and he just started covering him. Stuff like all the way chuck is right now. Somebody will just hit his hand and he could hit themselves, knock himself out. That's how sensitive that switching. And it's a shame. I'm as big as four. He took a couple of shots before that. Before that Bro, he took one to the head. He took one to go back to watch the fight again. But I remember him getting clipped a couple of times. Yeah, he got clipped a couple times. I heard it. The whole place smelled like weed.

Speaker 2:          01:49:36       Was that true? Oh my God, Dude. When I went to the bathroom, I went to go take a leak and that's how I was running back to the bathroom. It just stunk of weed in this one area and it's the same area. We're dudes. We're stealing dudes. Hats. Two guys were baked. It's fucked. They snatching hats off people's heads as they would walk, walk through the tunnel on the way to the arena sign. They got their hat on their focus and just snatch and dude's hats off. And there's all these animated gif files online. Other guy's hilarious. Is the same guy and they got these big stupid shit eating grin on their face. Like that's awesome. And the funniest one is when he tries to get Martin Kampmann his hat and he just misses. Just misses. I got walks by and you see the guy who like to retweet that later. Oh yeah, I will. I'll find the link.

Speaker 2:          01:50:22       Was the seller Sarah Pailin. He's losing his mind just like Sarah Pailin to set aside from, you know, chill son and uh, he stolen Aziz Ansari joke. It was like doing one of his, uh, his speeches about Anderson Silva and his manager and he did a disease joke. That's awesome. He called the little ghetto brothers busted on that. You can't do that. One is a punching bag and the other one I'm not worried about. Wow. He said that they'll get was black belt. You get a Mcdonald's and a gift set or whatever. The happier. He's the best shit talker by far. A fucking nice guy too, man. When you talked to Chael Sonnen like outside, he's a fucking funny, nice guy. He's just real good at talking shit. He's a politician and he can fucking fight dude, bro. Me and all this emotions that he's charging up and this is all like, look, you think about what Damien Maia got mad or got Anderson, Matt Damon My.

Speaker 2:          01:51:16       This is what he said. He said, I respect Anderson as a fighter. I don't respect them as a person. Whatever the fuck that means to Anderson. Why? I don't know. But that made him crazy, he got so angry and so we never seen Anderson standing in front of a guy yelling and screaming, screaming at him, calling him rich boy and you know, show me your Jujitsu and swearing at him saying all these different squares and then just beating his ass and mocking them. Never seen to Anderson do that before to anybody. And Demian Maia is generally known as a really nice guy and respectful guy in a martial artist. But that one statement, whatever the fuck it meant, threw him into a tizzy. What is gonna happen when he gets in the cage with channel Sunnen? Charles Center has talked so much shit about them making sacrifices to pick me God's and fucking all kinds of knots.

Speaker 2:          01:51:58       He's going, fuck. It doesn't stop. He doesn't stop. He goes to Pailin certain Doug, his twitter is just rampant with it, whose twitter is all like him talking shit. But I have not even seen this. Thank you for opening up my house. He does these questions and answers. I missed the one he did in Vancouver. I, I missed the other one before that, but everybody was talking about that. It said it was the funniest fucking q and a by far. My facebook. Somebody say yes. Peter Fogle the Guy Willie bar setup broke his nose, emailed it to me. Well, he just did another one. It just did another one. Okay. This is the second q and a. Then two of them so far pumping up the Anderson fight. Dude, he's fucking hilarious, but he fucked up when he's told that as he's Antasari joke, they're not going to do the Internet is not going to let them ride that out. Have you been to a website called a Wolfram? Wolfram Alpha. This Wolfram Alpha

Speaker 4:          01:52:46       for people who aren't aware of it is just project where they're trying to take the next step after Google and it's trying to be a website literally that you ask it a question. It gives you an answer. Right. It's so cool because like I put in my birthday in the weather and I got the exact temperature when I was born to the exact hour. I got the lows, the highs during the day. That cloud cover the population of Columbus at that time, the humidity, the pressure, the wind's blowing so much shit that if I was with doc from back to the future, I could totally get to the right second of the day that I needed to go back in time with, you know, if this will give you the information for that. You know, it's really funny that you just brought that up and then you're talking about this because there was a subject that was on the message board the other day that I thought was really interesting.

Speaker 4:          01:53:26       There's this new scientific discovery that they found where they do believe that it's possible that the universe might be far older than 14 billion years. That's what they think it is. Now. They think it's like 150 billion and it's just this small group of scientists and astronomers, the that have this possibility in their head and you know, it hasn't been sold yet entirely, but when you start thinking about stuff like that, people. There was like an argument on the board and the argument was there's some things about the universe. You're never going to be able to know. It's pointless to even try it. Never got to know when the universe began. How the fuck do they know that? How do you know that you're not going to ever be able to know? We are. If our understanding is constantly increasing. Okay. What we know today is so much more advanced than what we knew just 100 years ago or 200 years ago or 300 years ago, you know, a couple hundred years ago to get around.

Speaker 4:          01:54:13       You have to be on a fucking animal. Okay. You wanted an image of someone. You had to draw it, right. There was no cameras. Right? Think about that. All right. That's just a couple of hundred years ago. We don't know what the fuck kind of innovations going to come up a couple of 100 years from now or a couple thousand years from now. It might very well be possible that not only can we decipher exactly how the universe began, but we can probably. We're probably going to be able to get an accurate map of the history of the planet from the very beginning to now much more detailed, much more precise than we have today. We're probably going to be able to recreate or capture every single moment of every single day of every single hour that that's ever existed. That's it's all very possible. They're going to get crazier and crazier with time.

Speaker 4:          01:54:55       They're going to get crazier and crazier with breaking down the quantum mechanics of the universe. You know, when you start getting into like the crazy subatomic particles that disappear and reappear and exist in two different places at the same time or in a superposition and these things that they don't understand well. As we get more and more understanding and know more and more about the weirdness of the world, we're going to be able to figure out how to fucking decipher it. You know, and it might be that like, you know, like a time machine when the, when they invent a time machine or something like that or, or whatever the fuck you want to call this next stage of understanding of matter. When they invented the idea of a time machine is the only way you're gonna be able to travel back in time. It's once the first time machines invented, so they're going to invent a time machine and you can't go before that, but what you can do is anything from that, we'll be able to come back to that point, so everything that exists from now until whenever you can access it, as soon as they invent a time machine, why not?

Speaker 4:          01:55:47       Why fucking not shit's going to get crazy. If you can do this, nobody would have ever thought you could be able to do this. If you talked to someone in Shakespeare's day and say, do you think there's ever going to be able to time where I've take something out of my pocket and through the air, I ask it a question like, you could mean Wolfram Alpha. You can't do that. We can do that with Google. You can google voice it. You know what year did the Sistine Chapel get built? Bam. They tell you instantly and if you get. If it gets to a point and it's gone to if they've got the google, if it gets all Wolfram Alpha point, we can have. You can ask it a question, you can give any answer or it can give you any answer on any question of anything that's ever happened ever that human beings are aware of and you'll have all the information right there were you told that to people that lived in Shakespeare's Day.

Speaker 4:          01:56:26       They were told you about her fucking mind. It's going to get crazier than this. It has to because everything gets crazy. What the fuck is next? Sometimes I just drive in my car and I sit in traffic and I go, what the fuck is next? Is there going to be some crazy new thing that's going to change everything? Like is it, are we in a race between human beings figuring out what the next thing is? The next crazy innovation is or us just completely fucking everything up with polluting the fucking ocean and you know, nuclear explosions and wars and all that other crazy shit. Like are we in a race between like Schumann retarded chimpanzee instincts and technology? You ever thought about it like that? Like when we talk about like the peak oil documentary that we watched, we thought it was bullshit, but the idea of peak oil is a terrifying idea.

Speaker 4:          01:57:15       If it was true and if there was a finite amount of oil and they do bust into it and then we have, we're fucked, we have no oil. Things could get really crazy like that is really possible. Are they going to come up with something that's going to replace that and make everything better and make everything even more advanced and more simple and more, you know, more natural to the, to the environment. Are they going to figure that out first or are we going to run out of supplies and resources first? Like is that a battle is a battle between the human retarded monkey chimpanzee behavior of take, take, take. Don't think about the future and technology and innovation and the ability to harness matter.

Speaker 1:          01:57:48       I think whatever happens is not going to happen during our lifetimes. I don't think so. No. I think something crazy, a lifetime. Twenty years ago when you were finger banging, that chick behind boulder, Boston high school, that was going to be a milkshake thing with the same shit that is every year something new technology. Every year, every year there's going to be after we think the reaction to all this oil in the ocean. It's got to be a rehab. It's going to be. There's going to be innovation. Some. It's a horrible, horrible disaster. Some west coast, you know what I mean? Hopefully like what have jersey shore and the whole east coast beach gets destroyed and all those people for summer vacations. When it come to the west coast this summer it might be. It's too much of a drug to go from. Problem with that show is there's so many people like that and now think they can be famous

Speaker 2:          01:58:42       too. They can get on a fucking jersey shore, bro. I'm fucking auditioning for that. I'm fake Tan and Everyday Glendale lately. No. Glendale is off the hook now version. Yeah, the PR. They use that to Psycho Mike from K rock in La. That the thing that he did the video about, uh, about Glendale. No, dude, it's hilarious. It's all Armenians in Glendale. I forget the fucking bit. It's a really, really funny song. Did. It's ridiculous. This one place I go to Brooklyn, it's one place to go to called a Sushi joint. It's like this change, this strip mall. It has like Ernesto outdoor stores and there's a Sushi place, but all the stores are like fashion outlet and then like the windows are all black and stuff like that. And then the next thing is like something else. But what's weird is if you go by there at like two in the morning, none of those places are open.

Speaker 2:          01:59:33       But yet every single car there's like 100 cars in the parking lot. It's like, what the fuck is going on? That's how Glendale is. Everywhere you drive, you see these fake rug stores and shit. You know, it's partly luck and armo party, like an original song apparently. I'm going to watch that later. Uh, yeah. Somebody sent a, I think the video. I think Opie, opie and anthony twitter the other day, a nature's little flashlight. And it was at monkey using a frog to whack off like a fleshlight. Yeah, that's old school video. Funny Video. That monkey fucks that frog's mouth. That's the monkeys are down for their down for rape and shit. You know, we think about those champions to like Bj and the bear. We think they're all cute and shit. Then you find out about like their chimp at eight. That lady's face. And another chimp that fuck that dude up and rip his balls off and ripped his feet off. Chimps eat babies. Man. There's been recorded instances of chimps stealing babies and eating them. What the Fuck Joe Rogan. Why bother me with this shit? I got to what was sitting there having a good time. Like gentlemen, you got to talk to me about chimps. Eat and babies. What the fuck? Kind of been a table conversation. Is this cocksucker

Speaker 2:          02:00:41       he hit the two hour mark with me. That's the two hour mark. Yep. Alright, well we'll come up with one subject then we're gonna. Wrap this up. Joey, that's up to you. The subject. Uh, you had a job before you fucking Brian. You had to go with and stuff. What was I talking about? Senior, old surf. See? No. The other one before that. You see going to bring it up during the podcast. Oh, uh, I thought. I don't remember. I can't order an iphone. Shit. Is this, you're the fucking captain Kirk or this program for a word from our sponsor from 1:00 AM to 3:00 AM. Just trying to access the island. No, I wasn't. I knew I wanted to talk about that fucking guy. That Christian warrior who went looking for a lot. Yeah. Yeah. That's what I wanted to talk about. If you don't know this story, there's a fucking dude who is this just old white guy who's just Christian warrior from America who put a fucking.

Speaker 2:          02:01:37       He got a sword. He took a sword with them and a gun and he went to the fucking mountains of Pakistan and he went to the mountains of Pakistan to try to find Osama bin Ladin to kill him. And they caught his ass. Wow. Like, what are you doing dude? They put them in jail. I can't believe they didn't kill him. I mean, this guy was sitting in Kentucky or somewhere and they said, when they fuck it, I'm sick and tired of waiting for a sign to live. This has been going on for 10 years. Yeah. That's borrowed money from his cousin and he said, fuck it. I'll go over there like a boy scout. He made that grace your bitch. He ain't first you last a story. A 52 year old American citizen who said he was searching for Osama bin Laden was detained in Pakistan near the border with Afghanistan this week.

Speaker 2:          02:02:19       His name was Gary Faulkner from California was carrying a pistol, a sword night vision equipment and Christian religious books. What that might be, the last guy in the world you want looking for you. The last thing, the last dude in the world you want is a 52 year old man with a sword and a Bible and he's. He flew to the other side of the fucking world, defined you. He's got religious books, a gun and a Bible and a sore. Oh my God. Do. There's guys like doubt out there, out there, out there, out there, out there, and they're ready to go. You've got to remember that it's sometimes it's, you know, sometimes it's good to go online and watch some fucked up videos just to know that guy's out there. I don't like watching murder videos, but I watched one recently, but the Mexican drug lords killed this fucking guy. I cut this guy's head off. They showed a video. They put that shit online.

Speaker 2:          02:03:11       Watch youtube. I stopped watching this. Who started cutting his throat. Fuck that shit. My am. I need to watch the whole thing. Apparently he cuts his whole head off. The guy's squealing and making noises and over that crap coming out of his whole apparently terrible. It takes awhile for them to saw his head off and that's how they kill them. Hard to watch, man. Hard to watch. They tied the stood up, you know, just fucking cut his head off on video. Next time you see a video like that, go to kick [inaudible] dot com and white stag instead it and refresh your memory like gingers cake for this woman. That puts a cake down and as he sits on it and then she farts into the camera and it's the icing and everything bubbles. That's such a little fucking Weirdo because that. That'd be like ginger to your fucking taste buds.

Speaker 2:          02:03:55       After watching a d heading you up and tell you about these websites. It's all my website, my message board, you know I go to when I go to Joe Rogan Dot net, that forum, the forum right now is over $3, million posts. Some guy emailed me that does go to cake farts that come and watch that video. It's just in the main forum. There's 2 million, 737,000 posts now and then you count the retard room and all the other shit on there. There's more than 3 million posts or anything that's fucked up. Anything that's crazy. And the Internet whenever it comes out, it's like a portal to all things interesting and fucked up. So just it's my own website so I can't get away from it. If there's anything nutty that's out there in the world, I have the choice whether or not to watch it, but I don't have the choice whether or not to know it exists because someone's going to put it up there, you know, like that human centipede.

Speaker 2:          02:04:39       I ducked and dodged that human centipede video for a long time because I thought that it was like a short clip. Something fucked up. Like somebody who's mutated or someone who did something crazy to somebody then turns out it's just some Nettie horror movie. You know the whole story behind the human centipede. Did you go fucking see splice? No. I downloaded it, but the people don't even who are pirating it don't like the movie said it like they don't care about the quality of their torrance right now, so I have to wait because it's so bad. I couldn't even watch it. I was like, I can. I'm not going. I'm not going to pay to see this. The bad version. Horrible version like that. Halfway through the camera, man.

Speaker 1:          02:05:13       The sucks. There's nothing funny. The little ones, will they do it in a movie theater when someone like, how did he get away with that shit? Just put a little fucking tripod on that. A little thing where those soda sets, they put a tripod in there, Jack that sucker up and keep an eye out the door. People who've gotten caught, they got caught. No, they would go into a theater in Chicago. So the uh, the became took codes and you have them on the top side of your screen, right? Narrows it down to the theater and that's how they know, you know, so they can break down the images and they could find in the movie, boom. They go to the top feeder out of like, where do we go? What's that club we went to. It wasn't Chicago but it was the one with the older Sharpsburg. It's right in that area because I don't want them showing it. And it was an AMC and AMC said fuck it. So they put codes on the film then, but how they know who did it,

Speaker 2:          02:06:07       they don't know who did it. But I guess the theater is getting charged for it, so they have to make sure they have ushers that go in and look for cameras and grow. They find the theater. Right.

Speaker 1:          02:06:17       Well, this theater here at this day that he has this ring, all the ushers were part of the rent. Oh. So that's how they knew that it was the screen. And I used to buy old school

Speaker 2:          02:06:28       back in New York. We could walk down the street and be walking home from a comedy club and there'd be some fucking guy was. He had a little box out looking for people. They just put that. Put that video on the computer. Yeah, these guys would do it on vhs. They would make copies and every fucking copy would be, you know, Shittier and Shittier. So if you came to the dude like a couple of weeks after the movie was out, you're getting like fourth and fifth generation vhs copies of some fucking Bruce Willis movie. So tomorrow you're going to have bill burr on the posts coming in tomorrow at 3:00. Cool. This weekend I'm in three different places. I'm going on a fucking mad candidate tour. I'll tell you where I'm at right now, and we said, well, at the end we should always sponsor is fleshlight.com 100 times in the contract we had to do at the beginning of the contract.

Speaker 2:          02:07:14       Smarsh track. Alright. I'm in Saskatoon on Thursday night at the Saskatoon Arts Intervention Center. I'm in Grand Prairie, Alberta at the Cran prairie regional college and then I'm in Winnipeg and at the Burton Cummings Theater. So this is my just three Canada stop weekend. I'm looking forward to that. Canada is always a good time. They won't let Joey Diaz up there because he's a fucking criminal. You ever tried to get to Canada? Yeah, they turned me down two years ago. What did I say? Uh, they didn't tell the club, but it was, it just said my passport was no good and I didn't know what it was. I know Canada is and let you in. If you have a salt, they don't let you in. If you have a felony, they don't let you in. If you're a drunk driver, they don't let you in. If you're fucked up at all, either Dui and they don't fuck around man, but you know what, it's one of the reasons why Canada is so nice candidates.

Speaker 2:          02:08:02       Fucking nice man. People are nice and shit up there. Especially in Vancouver because Vancouver doesn't really get that cold and now it doesn't get like Boston called slows a little bit here and there, but it's mostly rain in the winter, you know, pretty temperate climate, a little rainy and shit, you know, it gets rainy, but Goddamn, it's cool up there. Restaurants are awesome. People are cool. The UFC, there was fucking funny as shit. I had a good time but I suck because I couldn't do a show because they usually have a. I usually get booked at the uh, red Robinson theater and unfortunately they had a gig there already and they couldn't cancel it and I couldn't. So. And they didn't want me doing a local show. We like a little place. I'm like, what if I just do like a little rock club or something like that.

Speaker 2:          02:08:39       They wanted me to not do it totally. They moved to UFC from Utah because they couldn't sell tickets. Selling tickets on Sunday. Man, that's a Jesus Day. Awesome chick fil a deck. Two in Utah is very religious man. People are very religious. You know, it's a strong mormon community and a strong religious community. People don't want to go out on a Sunday night. It's tough. It's amazing. Who else? The UFC cells like it's a Utah. You can criticize that. I could. I'm saying myself, but you know, you're looking at Utah and I fucking played there. You know, it's pretty, pretty decent place to live and I heard a lot of those Utah girls kind of slowly. Of course they are all religious. You're fucking crazy. They get a little crazy, right? The army base. I used to drive up there from boulder and shit. If you want your kid to be a freak number one rule of thumb is making religious cause you're gonna get one or two things. You're going to get a really crazy scared religious adult or you're going to get someone who rebels just shocks the first time they suck that 16. She just stops. She takes that fucking cross and the cross curls up. It's darker. The Berry, the sweeter the juice. Fuck yeah. She can't wait to get some black dick too. Right? The crisis at target. What? The cross is a target for Brian. You know, I took it to a bad place. There's no need to end the show on such a sour note.

Speaker 2:          02:10:08       Baby. Jesus. Well Ladies and gentlemen, if you want to follow Joey Diaz, exploits on twitter is mad flavor on twitter and a d f l a v O r m and a also Joey Coco Diaz Dot com, right? Yeah. Website. Joey Coco Diaz Dot com. And do you do do a facebook? Facebook was just Joe. It's out there. What are we playing games here? You want to fucking send me away? So a follow them on. Follow them on twitter. Fucking hilarious dude. Where you were? You have this weekend? Uh, Donna sub, uh, on Friday bitches at the Hollywood bowl. Oh, you're going to go see. Hey. Ready? Saying that you want to come right here? I got fucking tickets. They're adopting her in the hall of fame. He having sex with that night? Nobody. No one. No. But we can take a bus ride from your house. That dropped us off right in front of the fucking starts to glow sticks.

Speaker 2:          02:10:57       I got. And a pacifier. Let's get this show. Can we use your pacifier? No. You know what? I forgot how fucking good domus Donna summer was. Really forgot. I put it in the other day and I felt really Good Friday. No, dude, this is. This is. This is. This is what I remembered. I remembered when Joey Diaz told me, Joey Diaz and I were at the fucking Bray Improv. Was it the brain? We, we're the brain improv and I pull up in my truck, has a real good sound system, and he goes, put this in your fucking car right now. Joe Robin, put this in your fucking car. He goes, put on his fucking track. Put on this track so it puts on hot stuff. This fucking truck right here is this guy to come out?

Speaker 5:          02:11:44       Yeah.

Speaker 2:          02:11:47       No.

Speaker 1:          02:11:55       Yeah. So for you people on itunes just playing a song and he's dancing and joey doing joey ideas is doing the wave.

Speaker 5:          02:12:06       No joke.

Speaker 1:          02:12:08       And you could find me at five and some weed to smoke.

Speaker 2:          02:12:19       Sorry for the fine right now. I'm trying to turn it down because Jay was going to kill all your ears. Mute, mute, mute, mute. Mute your laptop. Here we go. Ladies and gentlemen, that's not the most professional thing in the world. The point is. Sorry about that. Shouldn't that be pushing buttons over here, Brian? I don't know what I'm saying. It's me. Shouldn't have. I don't know what the fuck I'm doing. The point is I forgotten a fucking good. Donna summer was. We were. We were smoking a joint outside the brain improv in the parking lot and joey puts on hot stuff and and I wrote a song about it. I wrote, I wrote a blog about it, about Donna. Summer was a bad ass. It's amazing. Somebody wrote a blog about that night because it was so powerful. I was listening to that music. I'm like, God damn, that music was good. That chick didn't give a fuck. I had the opposite reaction happened to me last week when I pit Donna summer on a on a road trip and my girlfriend goes, what are you a faggot? I was like, yeah, this does sound pretty gay when you say it like that.

Speaker 2:          02:13:21       She had some jamming songs were two p, p, p, p, p, p, p, p, p. like I said, she's a very intelligent girl. Everyone's got their own taste. Brian, Donna summer is just totally unnecessary, but it's right every now and then you got to respect that. There's some shit that's not. It's not like cool to like, but it's fun. Good. I agree. I was. I was in a bar the other day and journey. Don't stop believing. Started playing and I was like, God damn, that was good fucking song. Oh my God. Journey. I listened to some of night will, so it was ideal. It was fucking great. I'm like, I forgot how good journey was. The journey had some heads that guy had a very unusual voice and God damn did he connect with fat pitches. Fat pitches will go crazy journey. So Kenny, the gambler and love that, they love that chicken chicken company, chicken company, Kenny Rogers roasters and shit. You know Jimmy Dean died. Jimmy Dean, sausage lead sources for 30. That motherfucker was 81. He just drank booze every day and sausage and he lived to be 81. Can you imagine the jokes and. Haha. Is he had with his wife at lunch. You took my sausage, you know, Shit like that.

Speaker 2:          02:14:35       When that guy had so much money, I bet he'd just mounted his wife's face. Didn't even ask her questions. Pull those pants. I probably didn't even talk about it. It's probably didn't say the thing. He's so retched. Polish sausage again, bitch drinking whiskey. Just fucking her mouth shoots a batch town it's throat and walks out the door and gets on a horse. Can Be fucking Jimmy, Jimmy Dean, you know, billion dollar sausage. Empire. And he started out as a musician, right? There wasn't. It wasn't one of those fucking things. Maybe it was. You know what? Good for him. This episode is dedicated to you, Jimmy Dean. Good for you. You motherfucker. You met a living selling ground up animals, ground up pigs. All right folks, that's the end of this podcast. Thank you for tuning in. We will see you actually tomorrow. We got to one tomorrow with bill burr. Same Bat time, same bat channel three PM. Joey, Coco Diaz, ladies and gentleman, a black baby brian red band. Reichel laser. Actually it was way. No, there we go. Yeah, we can't get to you. Thanks everybody. We'll see you next week or tomorrow.