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RinCynar committed Jul 10, 2024
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52 changes: 30 additions & 22 deletions _posts/2022-12-06-OUTSIDE-THE-WINDOW.md
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---
title: OUTSIDE THE WINDOW
author: RinCynar
date: 2022-12-06
categories: [Literary,Essay]
tags: [sorrows]
title: OUTSIDE THE WINDOW
author: RinCynar
date: 2022-12-06
categories: [ Literary,Essay ]
tags: [ sorrows ]
---

It's a night
<br>
The sky is pitch black, the sun has long set, and there's no sign of moonlight. 
<br>
In the darkness, no single star shines, not even a few sparse bright spots are visible. The earth is draped in a layer of gray sand, hazy and mysterious, like a canvas covered in white cloth, soaked in thick ink, yet everything remains tranquil and serene. 
<br>
However, at some moment, this somewhat peaceful scene will be shattered, torn into pieces, and both will be truly acknowledged, just silently waiting.
The sky is pitch black, the sun has long set, and there's no sign of moonlight.<br>
In the darkness, no single star shines, not even a few sparse bright spots are visible. The earth is draped in a layer
of gray sand, hazy and mysterious, like a canvas covered in white cloth, soaked in thick ink, yet everything remains
tranquil and serene.<br>
However, at some moment, this somewhat peaceful scene will be shattered, torn into pieces, and both will be truly
acknowledged, just silently waiting.
<br>
A gust of cold wind blows, bringing a chill.
<br>
The black night unfolds like black satin. The sky is dark, devoid of any clouds, as if the entire city is shrouded in a hazy smoke. Through the window, only half of the sky is visible; the other half, the crescent moon hangs like a curved blade, emitting a cold, eerie glow, perhaps with countless stars—yes, one can easily imagine, before seeing it with one's own eyes, an ideal night sky, a night sky that perhaps only exists in fairy tales, a sky that is so real in every passing moment. 
<br>
Yet, if that layer of window paper were truly pierced, one might feel that those so-called dreams are as distant from reality as a thousand mountains and rivers apart.
The black night unfolds like black satin. The sky is dark, devoid of any clouds, as if the entire city is shrouded in a
hazy smoke. Through the window, only half of the sky is visible; the other half, the crescent moon hangs like a curved
blade, emitting a cold, eerie glow, perhaps with countless stars—yes, one can easily imagine, before seeing it with
one's own eyes, an ideal night sky, a night sky that perhaps only exists in fairy tales, a sky that is so real in every
passing moment.<br>
Yet, if that layer of window paper were truly pierced, one might feel that those so-called dreams are as distant from
reality as a thousand mountains and rivers apart.
<br>
Or perhaps, all of this is just an illusion.
<br>
Let's not dwell on it for now. At this moment, the dim yellow light of the street lamps does seep in from afar. 
<br>
There are no pedestrians on the street; the street lamps are merely lit for the sake of being lit. A breeze passes by, blowing down dry branches and fallen leaves, the sound somewhat eerie, sending shivers down one's spine, like a sob choked in the throat, so sorrowful yet powerless to struggle.
<br>
The dim yellow light of the street lamps, the swaying shadows of trees outside the window, in the night, sway like ghosts, as if menacing. Yet, it's neither quite ghostly nor quite alive. 
<br>
In this silent and dark world, the light inside the window is dim, as if there's some invisible barrier between night and light, keeping all sources of light outside, leaving only strands of gloom, obscure darkness, despairingly dark. 
Let's not dwell on it for now. At this moment, the dim yellow light of the street lamps does seep in from afar.<br>
There are no pedestrians on the street; the street lamps are merely lit for the sake of being lit. A breeze passes by,
blowing down dry branches and fallen leaves, the sound somewhat eerie, sending shivers down one's spine, like a sob
choked in the throat, so sorrowful yet powerless to struggle.
<br>
Below the window is a narrow, shadowy alleyway, pitch black...no, that dark, shadowy alley has gone far from me, perhaps existing only as a phantom in memory.
The dim yellow light of the street lamps, the swaying shadows of trees outside the window, in the night, sway like
ghosts, as if menacing. Yet, it's neither quite ghostly nor quite alive.<br>
In this silent and dark world, the light inside the window is dim, as if there's some invisible barrier between night
and light, keeping all sources of light outside, leaving only strands of gloom, obscure darkness, despairingly dark.<br>
Below the window is a narrow, shadowy alleyway, pitch black...no, that dark, shadowy alley has gone far from me, perhaps
existing only as a phantom in memory.
<br>
Everything exists, yet nothing exists anymore, existing in disappearance, existing in birth, existing in existence, but all of this should never have existed. 
Everything exists, yet nothing exists anymore, existing in disappearance, existing in birth, existing in existence, but
all of this should never have existed. 
50 changes: 32 additions & 18 deletions _posts/2022-12-11-AS-IT-USED-TO-BE.md
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---
title: AS IT USED TO BE
author: RinCynar
date: 2022-12-11
categories: [Literary,Essay]
tags: [sorrows]
title: AS IT USED TO BE
author: RinCynar
date: 2022-12-11
categories: [ Literary,Essay ]
tags: [ sorrows ]
---

Lost in illusions and false appearances, I watch the dust rise and fall, again and again. Only the red earth covered ground, scattered bits of wheat, and... perhaps a faint echo of laughter from years ago remain.
Lost in illusions and false appearances, I watch the dust rise and fall, again and again. Only the red earth covered
ground, scattered bits of wheat, and... perhaps a faint echo of laughter from years ago remain.
<br>
Maybe this place once held true beauty, but now it's just a faded memory.
<br>
I've traveled to many places, but I'm just a passerby lucky enough to have walked through fields once farmed by someone. Still, I can't help but sigh: oh dear, who could have cultivated such exquisite beauty!
I've traveled to many places, but I'm just a passerby lucky enough to have walked through fields once farmed by someone.
Still, I can't help but sigh: oh dear, who could have cultivated such exquisite beauty!
<br>
Maybe this place once held true beauty, but now it's just a faded memory.
<br>
I've traveled to many places, but I'm just a visitor fortunate enough to have passed through fields that someone once cultivated. Still, I can't help but sigh: oh dear, who could have created such exquisite beauty!
I've traveled to many places, but I'm just a visitor fortunate enough to have passed through fields that someone once
cultivated. Still, I can't help but sigh: oh dear, who could have created such exquisite beauty!
<br>
Even if the person from the past is gone, even if the fields have become barren, the dazzling starlight has been extinguished by mere rumors, hasn't it?
Even if the person from the past is gone, even if the fields have become barren, the dazzling starlight has been
extinguished by mere rumors, hasn't it?
<br>
I believe, perhaps I can still...
<br>
Expand All @@ -39,21 +43,25 @@ He's not only a dirty creature living off blood, but also a monster surviving on
<br>
They have their own secretive pasts, their private matters they don't want anyone to know, hidden emotions.
<br>
You & I were separated for 4 decades before being able to meet again; we shouldn't dwell on those partings but be grateful for our reunion.
You & I were separated for 4 decades before being able to meet again; we shouldn't dwell on those partings but be
grateful for our reunion.
<br>
Everything has cracks; that's where the light gets in.
<br>
That hundredth love letter, with just a few weighty words, his beloved never said throughout her life, because she had already lived it.
That hundredth love letter, with just a few weighty words, his beloved never said throughout her life, because she had
already lived it.
<br>
The Vermilion Bird finally smiles, embracing the brightest star in the Western sky & the entire sky itself, even the most dazzling constellation.
The Vermilion Bird finally smiles, embracing the brightest star in the Western sky & the entire sky itself, even the
most dazzling constellation.
<br>
At least, sour or sweet in the end, it should end sweetly in his heart.
<br>
No matter who comes, they can't resist the embrace of the one who carries the entire spring!
<br>
Look, it's so dazzling, so captivating, it moves the heart.
<br>
Tomorrow, will it be chilled watermelon & a fan, or gazing at the stars while waiting for fireflies to rise from the grass?
Tomorrow, will it be chilled watermelon & a fan, or gazing at the stars while waiting for fireflies to rise from the
grass?
<br>
In this lonely universe, you & I are never alone.
<br>
Expand All @@ -69,22 +77,28 @@ In this vast universe, we stand side by side on a solitary island.
<br>
Only Xuan Ce, he transcends data, seemingly losing the ability to turn everything into data with his brain.
<br>
Until the day the universe collapses, in the island-like hibernation chamber, the one closest to divinity awakens from dreams.
Until the day the universe collapses, in the island-like hibernation chamber, the one closest to divinity awakens from
dreams.
<br>
Blazing holy fire, consume my body. Pity us, humanity, for we have too many worries!
<br>
In the apricot blossom shadows, playing the flute until dawn.
<br>
Only the pitiful elder brother who deeply loves his younger brother, lost in the abyss of unforgivable guilt for 7 years, while the younger brother forgets everything.
Only the pitiful elder brother who deeply loves his younger brother, lost in the abyss of unforgivable guilt for 7
years, while the younger brother forgets everything.
<br>
What worldly storms, just a paper umbrella covers them, allowing him to remain so pure & happy forever.
<br>
Because his feelings are so sincere, so sincere that even the naive Bai XuanCe, who is still ignorant in the realm of love, unknowingly trusts him.
Because his feelings are so sincere, so sincere that even the naive Bai XuanCe, who is still ignorant in the realm of
love, unknowingly trusts him.
<br>
Demons lurk around us, please, light up the stars of humanity, we fear no darkness, as long as our hearts are still beating—Apostles of the Abyss.
Demons lurk around us, please, light up the stars of humanity, we fear no darkness, as long as our hearts are still
beating—Apostles of the Abyss.
<br>
<br>
It's a pity, it's lamentable, it's even more tragic. Without continuing to love, without growing old together, just "reminiscences as it used to be" will do. Passing each other by, that's the end for you & me. But I don't know if this is the best ending.
It's a pity, it's lamentable, it's even more tragic. Without continuing to love, without growing old together, just "
reminiscences as it used to be" will do. Passing each other by, that's the end for you & me. But I don't know if this is
the best ending.
<br>
<br>
Destiny • Reminiscences as it used to be.
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