Skip to content

Commit

Permalink
Minor homepage updates
Browse files Browse the repository at this point in the history
  • Loading branch information
Spelkington authored Jan 16, 2024
1 parent 2b2ab39 commit cdca529
Showing 1 changed file with 19 additions and 28 deletions.
47 changes: 19 additions & 28 deletions gatsby-config.js
Original file line number Diff line number Diff line change
Expand Up @@ -4,7 +4,7 @@ module.exports = {
author: {
name: "Spencer Elkington",
summary:
"who writes software that is broken, until - one day - it isn't.",
"a man who writes software that is broken until - someday - it isn't.",
},
description:
"A collection of rants and soft tutorials on programming, math, and economics",
Expand All @@ -27,18 +27,19 @@ module.exports = {
label: "LinkedIn",
link: "https://linkedin.com/in/spelkington",
},
{
label: "Contact",
link: "mailto:business+fromwebsite@chaoticgood.computer?subject=Regarding%20[TOPIC]&body=Hi,%20Spencer!",
},
],
flavorTexts: [
"Do you think God lives in Heaven because He, too, lives in fear of what He's created?",
"My favorite Age of Empires II loadout is: Sicilians; Flank; Losing Team",
"Ideal Age of Empires II loadout: Sicilians. Flank. Losing Team.",
"I can code FizzBuzz in 18 different ways, and all of them are wrong",
"Cause of Death: Gatsby & Typescript",
"“Recursion” is just a fancy term for Jupyter Notebooks calling other Jupyter Notebooks",
"“Recursion” is just a ten-dollar word for Jupyter Notebooks calling other Jupyter Notebooks",
"It's all fun and games until you ask me how a JavaScript Promise works",
"This website could've just been an email",
"All opinions expressed here are my own and do not reflect those of my employer (unless my employer is super cool)",
// "Flavortext 87",
"If you see a typo: no it's not",
"All opinions expressed here are my own and do not reflect those of my employer (unless my employer absolutely kicks ass)",
"ChatGPT is just Clippy Incarnate",
"If my Spark driver is going to die unexpectedly, it could at least do me a favor and take me with it",
"I can usually read a triangular graph on the 8th or 9th try",
Expand All @@ -47,39 +48,29 @@ module.exports = {
"Proud member of #TeamHubAndSpokeModel",
"BREAKING: The National Missile Defense has shot down a flying sleigh and nine reindeer off the coast of Miami",
"The only thing stopping us from achieving world peace is the 12 pentagons on every tiled sphere",
"Being at the front of the adoption curve means paying for Dominos in four interest-free payments",
"Absolutely thrilled to pay for Dominos in four interest-free payments",
"My dream is to one day be a part of the shady cabal that runs Wordle",
"Incredibly stoppable.",
"AWS Graviton is just compute clusters made of unsold Fire phones",
"Your email finds me incredibly unwell",
"Most of my nightmares involve load-bearing Jupyter notebooks",
"I will not sleep until the Keytar has the emoji it rightfully deserves",
// "Comments were removed to prevent being ratio'd on my own website",
// "what if we kissed 🥺👉👈 outside of Salt Lake City's Northrup Grumman IMAX Theater",
// "Please direct all concerns to the comment section below",
"Startup Idea: PIPs, but for your kids",
// "str'berry",
// "Twitter search: `<problematic word> until:2018-01-01 filter:follows`",
"Please direct all concerns to the comment section below",
"Proud creator of PIPs 4 Kidz",
"Lead developer of the 10x team at Microsoft making sure no Office application correctly supports code formatting",
"I don't know when and I don't know how, but I do know the AI apocalypse will start in Minecraft Command Blocks",
"Forrest Gump is the only movie that deserves to be more than two hours long",
"The finest 0.1x engineer west of the Mississippi",
"If you ask me how much money I've spent on Bloons Tower Defense 6, I'll cry",
"The finest 10% engineer west of the Mississippi",
"The finest 10÷ engineer west of the Mississippi",
"The government can't steal my thoughts because I haven't got any",
"Personal Finance Tip: If you don't pay into your retirement fund or health insurance, you won't need either of them",
"Personal Finance Tip: If you don't pay into your retirement fund or health insurance, you won't need either",
"Raised by a man whose most-endorsed skill on LinkedIn is “Interrogation”",
// "Incorrectly voted “Next Prophet” by my early-morning seminary cohort",
"Described by my third-grade teacher as “lazy, but efficient”",
"Between you and me, the long hair and beard is less a stylistic choice and more of a work ethic issue",
"game.Workspace.Player.Head:Destroy()",
"My ROBLOX account is old enough to drive",
"My third-grade teacher as “lazy, but efficient”",
"The long hair and beard is more “laziness” than “purposeful stylistic choice”",
"Proud owner of a ROBLOX account that is old enough to drive",
"Learning stenography hasn't make my code better, but it has made me bad, faster",
"Where do I see myself in five years? 1,000 AoEII MMR, hopefully.",
"SQL, but pronounced “Squeal”",
"I'd rather be shot into Sol herself than touch VBA ever again",
"SQL is pronounced “Squeal”",
"My goal is to be funny enough for my therapist to work pro bono",
"TCP throttling is just Prisoner's Dilemma for network engineers",
"Aspring to reach the range of Hedy Lamarr",
"Telling robots “please” and “thank-you” since 2016",
],
},
searchTags: [
Expand Down

0 comments on commit cdca529

Please sign in to comment.